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Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant Part 2 - Travel (355) - Nairaland

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Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant Part 2 by safex(m): 11:11am On Jul 16, 2020
I think I understand - we all have that agbero side of us reserved for such situation smiley
einsteino:


Yeah but it took my friend's nigerian side to compel her to (If you know what I mean)
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant Part 2 by ewaller: 4:00pm On Jul 16, 2020
Hello house, please a quick question.
Can a Spouse of a PR holder in canada book on any of the evacuation flight to Canada. Incase anyone have useful information regarding this please. Thanks lot
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant Part 2 by XX01(f): 5:02pm On Jul 16, 2020
PLSHELEP:
My people...

These "unfortunately" and "we regret" mails have been coming in but we thank God...

Been here since Feb, came in 2 weeks before the lockdown. POF slowly evaporating.

Please anyone that has leads for HR positions, kindly help a brother.

God bless you all.

You can also try reaching out to those with a similar career path and see what additional certifications you can do to get a foot in the door.
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant Part 2 by emmyN(m): 6:21pm On Jul 16, 2020
Blackbuddy:
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Ladies only? sad

1 Like

Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant Part 2 by NaijaCanadian28: 8:52pm On Jul 16, 2020
ewaller:
Hello house, please a quick question.
Can a Spouse of a PR holder in canada book on any of the evacuation flight to Canada. Incase anyone have useful information regarding this please. Thanks lot

Yes, spouse and parents of PR and citizens can travel. The restrictions does not apply to them.
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant Part 2 by Newmum0615: 11:55pm On Jul 16, 2020
Your head is there.
oseoji:


Typical gaslighting.Is it the system that raises hands for a partner to be beaten up? Is it the system that causes a partner to batter a person's mind relentlessly?
The family has already been destroyed by the abuser so why is the government being blamed?

Abuse is abuse,there's no IF ,AND or BUT.

The person benefitting from the police being called is the one who has suffered emotional, physical or psychological damage and rightly so.

A person who is able to get away from an abusive partner should be congratulated for being strong enough to leave.

Children suffer so much damage by watching their parents go at each other constantly, you produce unhappy children who repeat the same cycle thinking it is normal.

If a woman or man decides to use Canada as an opportunity to revenge,it's not anyone's place to chastise them. Do you know what they suffered?

If you treat a whole human being like shit for years and years and they bear it because of being in the Nigerian society,when they move to Canada and see they deserve better,it's only expected that the person will act out.

The guilt does NOT lie at the foot of the abused!

All these una statements are the reason why people die in abusive situations..There is only so much that a human being can take without breaking down.

Anyone who is abused should seek counseling for themselves to gather strength to move on.It is not your job to hold brief for your abuser.

You deserve better,your children deserve to grow up in a healthy happy home.




6 Likes 4 Shares

Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant Part 2 by Newmum0615: 11:58pm On Jul 16, 2020
It's people that are unhappy that Canada has taken the power to be abusive away from them that will be arguing against this your post. Enuf said.
SixSigma1:


@ oseoji:
Everything you said here is so on point.

I shake my head when I hear people say that the system here is set up to destroy the family. As far as I am concerned, the system is fair, and it is set up to protect everybody irrespective of your gender (male or female). All you need to do is to know the system; do the right things and your family will be intact.

Apart from the potential death of the person being abused (even in situations where the abuse is not physical), what many people fail to understand is the extent of other damages caused by such abuse (physical, psychological, emotional etc.) on the person being abused, the children and the society. The kids see everything going on and they in turn may become abuser or they feel it is okay to be abused in a relationship. You end up bringing up kids that becomes abusers and bully people at school or they keep quiet when being abused or bullied at school because they think it is okay to be abused.

Even if the person being abused refuses to call the police, the neighbors may notice that something is wrong and call the police. When you take your kids to see the doctor, or you take them to the hospital, they always ask them if they feel safe at home or if they are being abused at home. Be rest assured that if the kids do not feel safe at home they will say so and you can expect a child protection agent and or police knocking on your door if it is as a result of being abused at home. So, as you can see no matter how much you try to hide the abuse, it will eventually become open. The only solution is NO ABUSE, and everybody will be happy.

Finally, I repeat, if anybody is being abused in their relationship report the abuse to the police or talk to a lawyer. To the abuser, please STOP IT before you destroy yourself with a criminal record and inability to get a job in Canada (see my earlier comments below about this). Think about this before you start abusing somebody (or before committing any type of crime) and claiming the system is set up to destroy you. The system is not destroying you. You are the one destroying yourself.

17 Likes 5 Shares

Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant Part 2 by Echinedu1: 2:01am On Jul 17, 2020
NaijaCanadian28:


Yes, spouse and parents of PR and citizens can travel. The restrictions does not apply to them.

With a tourist visa?? Which airline go carry a spouse or parent with tourist visa this time?
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant Part 2 by Boss13: 3:22am On Jul 17, 2020
I have read some comments indicating the justice system is designed to be fair - Yes. However, practically it isn't. Don't take my word for it. Visit the nearest regional court or have a good discussion with a criminal lawyer. Infact I encourage everyone here to do so.

I have a clear understanding of how "out of touch" social media or chat fora can impose on individuals. Nevertheless, it is your responsibility to understand how the justice system operates. I also understand how people enjoy popular talking points, and like I previously wrote I'm less concerned with that, rather advise you strongly against getting yourself into situations you probably do not fully understand.

Is the justice system bias in Canada - Yes. As a matter of fact, your postal code determines the severity of your penalty. Nobody will tell you this till you confront the Crown or a Peace Officer a.k.a the Police.

I will repeat again because the same individual is still repeating the same ignorant talking point. The Police Officer, Crown, Child Services and entire Justice System do not care about you. To them, you are a job and a statistics and they will pursue things from their own agenda - which is primarily to advance their career. I recently discussed with an individual whose wife spanked the son due to poor behavior. The boy went to school and as a kid was discussing with his friends and in few days Child Services called them seeking appointment to visit them. Child services visited separated both parents and children, took the children to a separate room. Luckily for these family, the children are in their early teens and they didnt disclose any information.

Now let me tell you what would have happened if the children had said something the child service worker (case worker) wanted to hear. Immediate separation of kids and relocation to foster homes. The family will have to prove why the kids should return back to them and it is at the discretion of the case worker to say the family is no longer a threat to their children and the environment is healthy for them to function. Also, the case worker, at her discretion, will escalate the case to the police. Please note I said at her discretion because when I say the system can be bias this is part of it. Then there is potential criminal charge against the parents based on the report of the case worker.

For those in abusive relationship and still feel their marriage or relationship is important - go for counseling and also seek clinical therapy. If you feel your marriage/relationship is not important, leave or initiate dissolution of marriage. The Police is not a peace negotiator. However, a marriage counselor can broker peace and a therapist can sort out behavioral issues. I am not saying this for LIKES or to be popular. I am saying this for those who are unaware and to debunk ignorant talking points. Also, if you are tired of your marriage and want instance separation from your partner, you can call the Police tonight. There must not even be an argument, just tell them you fear for your life and you want your partner gone. The Police will be happy to do the job. Don't take my word for it - just dial 9-1-1.

Finally, for those spewing popular talking points and/or opinions for likes, be careful. You have no clue.

26 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant Part 2 by Transformium: 4:42am On Jul 17, 2020
Canny19:


The cute lady beside me slept for the better part of the journey while I was finding it hard to sleep. I was calm tho cos I got TCC (travel clearance certificate) from my village ppl and they already promised not to follow me to Canada. So I had nothing to worry about.

Landed in Edmonton and saw that one of my checked in bags was ripped. I wasn't surprised tho cos the bag had a whole lot of orisirisi and panti foodstuffs.
Stepped out of the airport and was greeted with cold but I decided not to use my jacket, I got shocked when my host came wearing armless and said the weather was warm... Ki lo warm exactly? Are you people playing me ni? It was at that moment I started dreading winter. As I type this, my jacket is on while people are wearing pants n bra outside my window ��

I'm settling in quite well even tho I'm still in shock how 10pm can be looking like 4pm and 5am be looking like 9am. There's no way one can predict the time by looking outside in this country.

It's time to start 'living life' as opposed to just 'merely existing' in Nigeria

I'm finally HOME. 10/7/20
Home is where an average person can afford 3 square meals per day. Home is where security is well guaranteed. Home is where there is no huge discrepancy between the rich and the poor. Home is where our resources and funds are not being embezzled by our corrupt leaders . Home is where there are job provisions for graduates. HOME is where there is HOPE!! Home is, home is, home is, home is.................. CANADA
Have a dream and work towards making it a reality.

NB: Ignore the errors cos I hate proofreading, I bet that's why I wrote IELTS twice grin

Big shout outs to those who made this happen.

Welcome to Canada! smiley I couldn’t stop laughing while reading your landing gist grin cheesy grin. Glad you made it. Congrats again!!

2 Likes

Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant Part 2 by 19CannyMum: 5:15am On Jul 17, 2020
Boss13:

Now let me tell you what would have happened if the children had said something the child service worker (case worker) wanted to hear. Immediate separation of kids and relocation to foster homes. The family will have to prove why the kids should return back to them and it is at the discretion of the case worker to say the family is no longer a threat to their children and the environment is healthy for them to function. Also, the case worker, at her discretion, will escalate the case to the police. Please note I said at her discretion because when I say the system can be bias this is part of it. Then there is potential criminal charge against the parents based on the report of the case worker.


Ermmmm... Pardon me but I'm not sure that's how it works. Because I know someone whose child called 911 on the dad. Before police arrived, papa beat the living daylights out of the boy so that he will know he beat the boy. Police came. Pikin told police to take him away he doesn't want to stay. Police still did not take him because they realised that there was no real abuse.

If the situation is genuinely not abusive you have nothing to be afraid of. I had a personal case worker for about a year and there's 'nothing they want to hear.' They're just doing their job. If your hands are clean, the system won't automatically turn against you.

However if you're beating children in a country that you voluntarily moved to when you were aware that such method of discipline is not allowed, you're on your own.

We also need to be aware that a child you're beating here even if they don't report, will be traumatised. Because that's how they are conditioned by the environment. It is just not normal here to be spanked talkless of beaten. They themselves will feel victimized and may never forgive you. They will probably need therapy as adults and they may hate you.

Parents, please read this thread just posted today on reddit. Children of nowadays are not us of those days so we need to evolve our parenting styles. Read and choose your methods of discipline carefully. https://www.reddit.com/r/Nigeria/comments/hs9rkb/african_parents_are_abusive/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share

6 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant Part 2 by Boss13: 6:11am On Jul 17, 2020
19CannyMum:


Ermmmm... Pardon me but I'm not sure that's how it works. Because I know someone whose child called 911 on the dad. Before police arrived, papa beat the living daylights out of the boy so that he will know he beat the boy. Police came. Pikin told police to take him away he doesn't want to stay. Police still did not take him because they realised that there was no real abuse.

If the situation is genuinely not abusive you have nothing to be afraid of. I had a personal case worker for about a year and there's 'nothing they want to hear.' They're just doing their job. If your hands are clean, the system won't automatically turn against you.

However if you're beating children in a country that you voluntarily moved to when you were aware that such method of discipline is not allowed, you're on your own.

We also need to be aware that a child you're beating here even if they don't report, will be traumatised. Because that's how they are conditioned by the environment. It is just not normal here to be spanked talkless of beaten. They themselves will feel victimized and may never forgive you. They will probably need therapy as adults and they may hate you.

Parents, please read this thread just posted today on reddit. Children of nowadays are not us of those days so we need to evolve our parenting styles. Read and choose your methods of discipline carefully. https://www.reddit.com/r/Nigeria/comments/hs9rkb/african_parents_are_abusive/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share

Thanks for your comment and for validating some of my points.

Paragraph 1 - You know the individual and I don't. However, the Police cannot take a child. It is not their job. The Police may choose to escalate the case to Child Services and this is often done when there are domestic issues. I don't know how long this is but the Police would have reported to Child Services to review the case.

Paragraph 2 - Well you maybe surprised to know that what you call discipline maybe considered abuse and what you call abuse may be considered discipline. When your case is under review, the assessment is dependent on the case worker. May I also ask why you have a case with child services? This is not good because it opens you up for bias assessment in the future if a similar circumstances occur.

You are very accurate with child services case workers doing their job. However, they are not doing their job for your own best interests rather from their own agenda. Just like we pursue our self interest at our workplace, the case worker pursue their own agenda too. Please, I will stress here - don't get it twisted.

Now let me tell you another story - this happened around June 2020 and I don't know if you are aware of this story. A Nigerian family lost their son and told paramedics that their son choked on his food. The food here I believe was meatballs and the parents said it was his favorite. I got to know about the story because a GoFundMe was created for funeral services. My opinion on this is that a child cannot choke on his favorite food especially if that's what he enjoys eating. There is the possibility of force feeding and that's abuse. I'm not saying it can't happen but the story doesn't add up. I have advised they get a criminal lawyer ready because the police will investigate the matter and where stories don't add up - Omo na criminal case.

Why am I highlighting this - for the righteous and popular talking points opinionated ignorant individuals quick to express ignorant dangerous opinions to know that they are not above mistakes. It is easy to speak about things you don't know, but stupid to stand on them especially when you have no understanding or knowledge.

9 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant Part 2 by odiliikenna: 7:30am On Jul 17, 2020
Please I need some advice here. I recently got a letter of interest on the 16th of July 2020 from New Brunswick. I am single now but I and my finace will be doing our court marriage in August 2020. When will it be the right time to include her to my profile as my wife. Currently now I have gone to New Brunswick site to open a profile and I still indicated that I am still single. Will I be able to update my Marital status in New Brunswick site as well as my express entry profile after our court marriage in August 2020. Please anybody with experience should help with what I can do.
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant Part 2 by oseoji: 8:22am On Jul 17, 2020
Again,ABUSE is ABUSE.


It is NOT your job to take them to therapy or counseling.They need to come to realise that for themselves.Is it after you get killed that they'll now use you as a reason for change?

When someone is beating you to kill you,believe me,they actually mean to kill you and will do so one day.

Women and men that are stabbed or set ablaze by their spouses will tell you it didn't start from the blues. There is always a pattern. Slap here,slap there,punch here,punch there. Telling you that you are useless and hopeless.

How can a marriage work when someone born of a woman like you makes you feel worthless ,berates you constantly and ontop of it beats you like an animal.

An abuser is most likely a psychopath that will beat down your psychological well-being to the point that you start believing their lies and thinking they are right when they say you are worthless. They usually select their prey.

I work with victims of abuse (both male and female) and the impact is beyond what I can describe. You'll see a grown man or woman who cannot even maintain eye contact,no drop of self confidence, nervous and shaky when there's loud noises, apologising for every single thing.

Why lay blame at the door of the victim? Hold up the family,go for counseling. There is nothing to hold up if the very fabric of the marriage has been torn to shreds.

What sort of children can a woman or man who feels worthless raise?Most of these children who grow up to do the same thing to their partners..daughters who enter abusive relationships because they think it is normal to be beaten up.

Sons who have low self esteem or think that the best way to sort an argument is to throw hands or berate another human being. Some go on to have mental health problems and personality disorders.


Staying married is NOT worth the after effects of abuse.If an abuser wants to change,let them do it by themselves first,away from you.It is NOT your job to save them from themselves.


People love to make excuses for abusers and claim they have some underground knowledge.

Someone who tells a victim to go to a counselor and put the welfare of the marriage ABOVE their own mental and physical well-being has issues because they underestimate the far reaching consequences of abuse.

NL is over run with people who victim blame and ask you what you have done wrong..stop talking back,say nothing,be respectful,stop triggering them .. forgetting that an abuser needs no excuse. Think about it,there are couples who engage in fights even in old age,grown up children witness their dad still beating their mum or their dad being emotionally abused by their mum and a lot feel powerless.It never ever ends.


Again if you are being abused,find the strength to save yourself before you end up on front page,same people will come to ask why you didn't leave.

Done with this..I'm not even Canadian .

26 Likes 5 Shares

Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant Part 2 by Claire40: 9:11am On Jul 17, 2020
Lol@ I am not even Canadian. Man pikin is tired of talking
oseoji:




Done with this..I'm not even Canadian .





Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant Part 2 by Claire40: 9:14am On Jul 17, 2020
That's the stream open for now. Their earlier batches this year were open to males too. You can check their site periodically to know when other streams will open
emmyN:


Ladies only? sad

1 Like

Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant Part 2 by smartkester(m): 12:37pm On Jul 17, 2020
odiliikenna:
Please I need some advice here. I recently got a letter of interest on the 16th of July 2020 from New Brunswick. I am single now but I and my finace will be doing our court marriage in August 2020. When will it be the right time to include her to my profile as my wife. Currently now I have gone to New Brunswick site to open a profile and I still indicated that I am still single. Will I be able to update my Marital status in New Brunswick site as well as my express entry profile after our court marriage in August 2020. Please anybody with experience should help with what I can do.
hello sir, I sent you a mail, can we have a brief chat off nairaland?
I just need to get some information from you sir, best.
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant Part 2 by tlomo: 5:30pm On Jul 17, 2020
[quote author=odiliikenna post=91796536]Please I need some advice here. I recently got a letter of interest on the 16th of July 2020 from New Brunswick. I am single now but I and my finace will be doing our court marriage in August 2020. When will it be the right time to include her to my profile as my wife. Currently now I have gone to New Brunswick site to open a profile and I still indicated that I am still single. Will I be able to update my Marital status in New Brunswick site as well as my express entry profile after our court marriage in August 2020. Please anybody with experience should help with what I can do.

Congratulations on the LOI bro. Adding your wife after marriage will cause no harm so far your wedding certificate is issue by Government of Nigeria. Alot of people have done that. If I may ask, what is your NOC and did you attend any information session organized by the province of New Brunswick?.
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant Part 2 by NaijaCanadian28: 5:40pm On Jul 17, 2020
Echinedu1:


With a tourist visa?? Which airline go carry a spouse or parent with tourist visa this time?

Ma/Sir I don’t know how the arranged flight works. What I said is based on the current update from IRCC about the travel restrictions. You can check it to confirm.
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant Part 2 by odiliikenna: 6:36pm On Jul 17, 2020
smartkester:
hello sir, I sent you a mail, can we have a brief chat off nairaland?
I just need to get some information from you sir, best.

Ok.
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant Part 2 by odiliikenna: 6:48pm On Jul 17, 2020
[quote author=tlomo post=91814963][/quote]
Thanks bro. My NOC is 1311 and i didn't attend any information section.

1 Like

Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant Part 2 by abiodunn: 7:54pm On Jul 17, 2020
Congratulations. Do you speak French or updated your profile with French scores?
odiliikenna:

Thanks bro. My NOC is 1311 and i didn't attend any information section.
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant Part 2 by Cherrymia: 8:27pm On Jul 17, 2020
[b][/b]Really enjoyed your gist.I have been a silent guest/reader.please I have a quick question as we also have a ticket booked before the lock down.How did you reroute the ticket and please can tell me the cost of going to cotonu airport. Thanks
Canny19:


The cute lady beside me slept for the better part of the journey while I was finding it hard to sleep. I was calm tho cos I got TCC (travel clearance certificate) from my village ppl and they already promised not to follow me to Canada. So I had nothing to worry about.

Landed in Edmonton and saw that one of my checked in bags was ripped. I wasn't surprised tho cos the bag had a whole lot of orisirisi and panti foodstuffs.
Stepped out of the airport and was greeted with cold but I decided not to use my jacket, I got shocked when my host came wearing armless and said the weather was warm... Ki lo warm exactly? Are you people playing me ni? It was at that moment I started dreading winter. As I type this, my jacket is on while people are wearing pants n bra outside my window ��

I'm settling in quite well even tho I'm still in shock how 10pm can be looking like 4pm and 5am be looking like 9am. There's no way one can predict the time by looking outside in this country.

It's time to start 'living life' as opposed to just 'merely existing' in Nigeria

I'm finally HOME. 10/7/20
Home is where an average person can afford 3 square meals per day. Home is where security is well guaranteed. Home is where there is no huge discrepancy between the rich and the poor. Home is where our resources and funds are not being embezzled by our corrupt leaders . Home is where there are job provisions for graduates. HOME is where there is HOPE!! Home is, home is, home is, home is.................. CANADA
Have a dream and work towards making it a reality.

NB: Ignore the errors cos I hate proofreading, I bet that's why I wrote IELTS twice grin

Big shout outs to those who made this happen.
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant Part 2 by Canny19: 9:41pm On Jul 17, 2020
Cherrymia:
[b][/b]Really enjoyed your gist.I have been a silent guest/reader.please I have a quick question as we also have a ticket booked before the lock down.How did you reroute the ticket and please can tell me the cost of going to cotonu airport. Thanks
If you booked with Ethiopian Airlines, go to their office and table your request. The cost of flying to Cotonou depends on the number of people flying, it's a chartered flight so the cost is evenly shared among the travelers. Going through the land border is also an alternative you can explore.

4 Likes

Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant Part 2 by Canny19: 10:00pm On Jul 17, 2020
Transformium:


Welcome to Canada! smiley I couldn’t stop laughing while reading your landing gist grin cheesy grin. Glad you made it. Congrats again!!

Thanks

1 Like

Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant Part 2 by PLSHELEP: 10:06pm On Jul 17, 2020
Thanks. Already on the sykes route.

Kekereekun123:
there are survivals jobs like customer care and others. Sykes, concentrix and sutherlandglobal are all recruiting work from home customer care agents
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant Part 2 by yokus(f): 10:51pm On Jul 17, 2020
I concur.
However, I have seen cases of false reporting
Thankfully, my friend had evidence andthe police confirmed the evidence. He would have lost everything now if not for that evidence.
Zero tolerance for abuse
Communication is key
No one deserves abuse and no one deserves to be lied on either.


SixSigma1:


@ oseoji:
Everything you said here is so on point.

I shake my head when I hear people say that the system here is set up to destroy the family. As far as I am concerned, the system is fair, and it is set up to protect everybody irrespective of your gender (male or female). All you need to do is to know the system; do the right things and your family will be intact.

Apart from the potential death of the person being abused (even in situations where the abuse is not physical), what many people fail to understand is the extent of other damages caused by such abuse (physical, psychological, emotional etc.) on the person being abused, the children and the society. The kids see everything going on and they in turn may become abuser or they feel it is okay to be abused in a relationship. You end up bringing up kids that become abusers and bully people at school or they keep quiet when being abused or bullied at school because they think it is okay to be abused.

Even if the person being abused refuses to call the police, the neighbors may notice that something is wrong and call the police. When you take your kids to see the doctor, or you take them to the hospital, they always ask them if they feel safe at home or if they are being abused at home. Be rest assured that if the kids do not feel safe at home they will say so and you can expect a child protection agent and or police knocking on your door if it is as a result of being abused at home. So, as you can see no matter how much you try to hide the abuse, it will eventually become open. The only solution is NO ABUSE, and everybody will be happy.

Finally, I repeat, if anybody is being abused in their relationship report the abuse to the police or talk to a lawyer. To the abuser, please STOP IT before you destroy yourself with a criminal record and inability to get a job in Canada (see my earlier comments below about this). Think about this before you start abusing somebody (or before committing any type of crime) and claiming the system is set up to destroy you. The system is not destroying you. You are the one destroying yourself.








1 Like

Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant Part 2 by SixSigma1(m): 11:47pm On Jul 17, 2020
yokus:
I concur.
However, I have seen cases of false reporting
Thankfully, my friend had evidence andthe police confirmed the evidence. He would have lost everything now if not for that evidence.
Zero tolerance for abuse
Communication is key
No one deserves abuse and no one deserves to be lied on either.

You are very correct with everything you wrote. There are definitely cases of false reporting and lies. This is also not acceptable and it is also a crime called public mischief here in Canada. I mentioned it in my first post on this topic. Part of the post that talks about false reporting is below:

SixSigma1:

Having said all of the above, you mentioned that the husband is giving the wife a tough time. What do you mean by he is giving her tough time? Is it that they are just having disagreement that they need to sort out between themselves? Is it that he always wants things his own way which does not necessarily mean that he is abusing her? So, what do you mean by giving her tough time?

The reason I am asking all these questions is that if the definition of your giving her tough time is really not that she is being abused and she reports it as she being abused by him (i.e that he is committing a crime when he has not committed any crime), she (your colleague sister) can be charged for public mischief.

Public Mischief Under the Criminal Code of Canada: Section 140 of the Criminal Code of Canada reads as follows:

140 (1) Every one commits public mischief who, with intent to mislead, causes a peace officer to enter on or continue an investigation by
(a) making a false statement that accuses some other person of having committed an offence;
(b) doing anything intended to cause some other person to be suspected of having committed an offence that the other person has not committed, or to divert suspicion from himself;
(c) reporting that an offence has been committed when it has not been committed; or
(d) reporting or in any other way making it known or causing it to be made known that he or some other person has died when he or that other person has not died.

So, as you see if what he is doing is not abusive and she reports him as being abusive she may be violating section 140 (1c) above.

In conclusion, she needs to be sure of her husband’s actions before reporting him or better still talk to a lawyer first.

Disclaimer: I am not a lawyer. So, do not take the above as a legal advice.

Just like there is ZERO tolerance for abuse, so also is ZERO tolerance for lying to the police about being abused. Hence, when in doubt talk to a lawyer first.

5 Likes 4 Shares

Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant Part 2 by MoneySmart: 1:41am On Jul 18, 2020
Boss13:
I have read some comments indicating the justice system is designed to be fair - Yes. However, practically it isn't. Don't take my word for it. Visit the nearest regional court or have a good discussion with a criminal lawyer. Infact I encourage everyone here to do so.

I have a clear understanding of how "out of touch" social media or chat fora can impose on individuals. Nevertheless, it is your responsibility to understand how the justice system operates. I also understand how people enjoy popular talking points, and like I previously wrote I'm less concerned with that, rather advise you strongly against getting yourself into situations you probably do not fully understand.

Is the justice system bias in Canada - Yes. As a matter of fact, your postal code determines the severity of your penalty. Nobody will tell you this till you confront the Crown or a Peace Officer a.k.a the Police.

I will repeat again because the same individual is still repeating the same ignorant talking point. The Police Officer, Crown, Child Services and entire Justice System do not care about you. To them, you are a job and a statistics and they will pursue things from their own agenda - which is primarily to advance their career. I recently discussed with an individual whose wife spanked the son due to poor behavior. The boy went to school and as a kid was discussing with his friends and in few days Child Services called them seeking appointment to visit them. Child services visited separated both parents and children, took the children to a separate room. Luckily for these family, the children are in their early teens and they didnt disclose any information.

Now let me tell you what would have happened if the children had said something the child service worker (case worker) wanted to hear. Immediate separation of kids and relocation to foster homes. The family will have to prove why the kids should return back to them and it is at the discretion of the case worker to say the family is no longer a threat to their children and the environment is healthy for them to function. Also, the case worker, at her discretion, will escalate the case to the police. Please note I said at her discretion because when I say the system can be bias this is part of it. Then there is potential criminal charge against the parents based on the report of the case worker.

For those in abusive relationship and still feel their marriage or relationship is important - go for counseling and also seek clinical therapy. If you feel your marriage/relationship is not important, leave or initiate dissolution of marriage. The Police is not a peace negotiator. However, a marriage counselor can broker peace and a therapist can sort out behavioral issues. I am not saying this for LIKES or to be popular. I am saying this for those who are unaware and to debunk ignorant talking points. Also, if you are tired of your marriage and want instance separation from your partner, you can call the Police tonight. There must not even be an argument, just tell them you fear for your life and you want your partner gone. The Police will be happy to do the job. Don't take my word for it - just dial 9-1-1.

Finally, for those spewing popular talking points and/or opinions for likes, be careful. You have no clue.

Since registering on nairaland 5 years ago and reading posts on nairaland everyday, this will be my first post as I have been a silent reader.

The tone of this your post is better than most of the other ones that you have posted on this issue. However, bro, I need to be honest with you, you have to chill with the way you are making conclusions about people you do not know, have never met and will probably never meet.

The bolded areas in your writeup above are just uncalled for. Simply because an individual’s viewpoint is different from yours, you keep on stating that the individual’s talking point is ignorant, and that they are repeating it. What makes your viewpoint correct and theirs ignorant? Do you expect them to change their viewpoint simply because you think yours is right? Think about that for a second. Why can’t you make your point and let people either take it or leave it.

How do you know that the individual is saying what they are saying for likes? Reading all the postings of this person regarding this topic and other topics, it looks to me that this individual is very intelligent, and that he is not making his posts for likes.

As you will see, this person is not even bothered by any of your posts even though you keep referring to him derogatorily in your posts. So, please make your point and move on.

For me to make this first post after 5 years on nairaland, you must know that I am very bothered about your approach. I do hope you will know better than attacking me for this post.

Peace!

32 Likes 5 Shares

Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant Part 2 by Praia(f): 2:46am On Jul 18, 2020
Boss13:
I have read some comments indicating the justice system is designed to be fair - Yes. However, practically it isn't. Don't take my word for it. Visit the nearest regional court or have a good discussion with a criminal lawyer. Infact I encourage everyone here to do so.

I have a clear understanding of how "out of touch" social media or chat fora can impose on individuals. Nevertheless, it is your responsibility to understand how the justice system operates. I also understand how people enjoy popular talking points, and like I previously wrote I'm less concerned with that, rather advise you strongly against getting yourself into situations you probably do not fully understand.

Is the justice system bias in Canada - Yes. As a matter of fact, your postal code determines the severity of your penalty. Nobody will tell you this till you confront the Crown or a Peace Officer a.k.a the Police.

I will repeat again because the same individual is still repeating the same ignorant talking point. The Police Officer, Crown, Child Services and entire Justice System do not care about you. To them, you are a job and a statistics and they will pursue things from their own agenda - which is primarily to advance their career. I recently discussed with an individual whose wife spanked the son due to poor behavior. The boy went to school and as a kid was discussing with his friends and in few days Child Services called them seeking appointment to visit them. Child services visited separated both parents and children, took the children to a separate room. Luckily for these family, the children are in their early teens and they didnt disclose any information.

Now let me tell you what would have happened if the children had said something the child service worker (case worker) wanted to hear. Immediate separation of kids and relocation to foster homes. The family will have to prove why the kids should return back to them and it is at the discretion of the case worker to say the family is no longer a threat to their children and the environment is healthy for them to function. Also, the case worker, at her discretion, will escalate the case to the police. Please note I said at her discretion because when I say the system can be bias this is part of it. Then there is potential criminal charge against the parents based on the report of the case worker.

For those in abusive relationship and still feel their marriage or relationship is important - go for counseling and also seek clinical therapy. If you feel your marriage/relationship is not important, leave or initiate dissolution of marriage. The Police is not a peace negotiator. However, a marriage counselor can broker peace and a therapist can sort out behavioral issues. I am not saying this for LIKES or to be popular. I am saying this for those who are unaware and to debunk ignorant talking points. Also, if you are tired of your marriage and want instance separation from your partner, you can call the Police tonight. There must not even be an argument, just tell them you fear for your life and you want your partner gone. The Police will be happy to do the job. Don't take my word for it - just dial 9-1-1.

Finally, for those spewing popular talking points and/or opinions for likes, be careful. You have no clue.

Child services is doing a superb job. Hopefully, Nigeria would one day have such a system and the abuse of children, which seems like the norm, would become a thing of the past.

Canada Police is the absolute best. They've got no time to indulge abusers. Anyone who has issues should go seek help themselves.

I love Canada.

11 Likes 5 Shares

Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant Part 2 by Boss13: 3:07am On Jul 18, 2020
MoneySmart:


Since registering on nairaland 5 years ago and reading posts on nairaland everyday, this will be my first post as I have been a silent reader.

The tone of this your post is better than most of the other ones that you have posted on this issue. However, bro, I need to be honest with you, you have to chill with the way you are making conclusions about people you do not know, have never met and will probably never meet.

The bolded areas in your writeup above are just uncalled for. Simply because an individual’s viewpoint is different from yours, you keep on stating that the individual’s talking point is ignorant, and that they are repeating it. What makes your viewpoint correct and theirs ignorant? Do you expect them to change their viewpoint simply because you think yours is right? Think about that for a second. Why can’t you make your point and let people either take it or leave it.

How do you know that the individual is saying what they are saying for likes? Reading all the postings of this person regarding this topic and other topics, it looks to me that this individual is very intelligent, and that he is not making his posts for likes.

As you will see, this person is not even bothered by any of your posts even though you keep referring to him derogatorily in your posts. So, please make your point and move on.

For me to make this first post after 5 years on nairaland, you must know that I am very bothered about your approach. I do hope you will know better than attacking me for this post.

Peace!

Hi MoneySmart,

Glad you took out time to express your opinion. As humans, we are social animals. We are influenced by the actions, ideas and experiences of others. If you understand how the Media and Hollywood works, you would also understand how views are framed. It is opined that experience is the best teacher. However, wise people learn from the experiences of others to avoid mistakes.

I passionately expressed myself because the comment was dangerous. I strongly insulted the individual because he is ignorant and decided to stand by his ignorance. While there is absolutely nothing wrong with being ignorant, it is stupid to stand by an ignorant viewpoint. There are certain situations or topics I am ignorant on or half knowledgeable. However, I do not express an opinion or stick by an ignorant opinion. The category of people I know that take such action are MAD MEN.

In life, it is so easy to give advice especially when you are remote from the situation, unaware of the full information, detached or have no interest in the individuals involved. For example, everybody is a great marriage counselor on other people's marriage other than theirs. It is also funny that people are quick to give advices themselves will NEVER implement. Some people have suggested that abuse victims do not need therapy. How would a victim heal? Often abuse victims tend to become the abusers later on in life. Another example are molested children who become pedophiles. Also, a chronic abuser might be unaware of why he/she is abusive or that they are abusive. Oh yes, you would be shocked.

In other not to beat around the bush or to seem repetitive, I have presented an alternative approach based on the lives of people who initially felt their actions were right, only to discover they made a mistake. Their discovery is as a result of their OWN experience and now they wish they had adopted a different approach. Fiction is different from reality. I can confirm to you that these individuals, the alleged victims who escalated as well as the alleged accused, are experiencing a difficult time.

To conclude, I wasn't interested in the response of the individual and still not interested. This is not a debate. My focus was to clarify how dangerous, ignorant and stupid his comments were and to provide alternative suggestions that works. For victims in abusive marriages - YES, you need therapy whether you want to continue in the marriage/relationship or not and if you think your marriage is important, both you and your partner need therapy and counseling. Also, remember, you chose your partner. Hence, leaving or staying in your relationship/marriage is also a CHOICE. Choices comes with circumstances, either good or bad. So the choice is yours to make and don't blame anyone, other than yourself, for the choices you make in life. This is my last take on this. I believe I have expressed myself enough.

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