|Join Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New|
Stats: 2,232,059 members, 4,884,126 topics. Date: Tuesday, 23 April 2019 at 01:08 AM
|How Important Is It To Marry A Younger Lady As Wife ? by Smile4mee01: 3:13pm On Feb 10|
I am 34 yrs younger and woukd love to start a family.
However, my big brothers and cousins have all been throwing in advice even when I dont ask. I guess they just watching out for me. They all subtly told me to marry a younger lady as wife. And they tell me the benefits i.e
1. Children: biologically women are at their best before 30. After then it's a decline in the quality of her eggs which might affect her ability to have healthy children.
2. Women age faster than men regardless of how much make up they try to use to cover this. In 15 yrs, if I marry a lady my age, she could look way older than I am and no more sexually appealing.
3. Women about your age kinda find it hard to give you the respect you need as they tend not to take you seriously.
And a few other reasons.
One even said dont marry a lady who is fat or have a tendency to be as you will not like what u see after she has a child.
I regard and respect these brothers. The closest one to me has had 2 failed marriages and he is happy to share some deep knowledge with me.
Please let me know your thoughts. My decision could as well make a lady somewhere sober.
|Re: How Important Is It To Marry A Younger Lady As Wife ? by dulux07(m): 3:26pm On Feb 10|
Good advice and good reasons, but not compulsory. I did give the same advise too.
But Most times love is unplanned for, all this specs may not matter, in the end non of this guarantees a happy home except good character.
So don't make this the only thing u consider in choosing a partner
4 Likes 1 Share
|Re: How Important Is It To Marry A Younger Lady As Wife ? by Hardrive(m): 3:27pm On Feb 10|
The most important attribute in a woman for me is level headedness. You want a woman that would give you peace of mind. That is the only way you can enjoy marriage. Not if she is fat or looking older than you. But it is your choice to make not mine. Also look for compatibility in other areas i.e genotype.
|Re: How Important Is It To Marry A Younger Lady As Wife ? by Mizwisdom(f): 3:42pm On Feb 10|
There's enough women and men, shared equally to go round. If you doubt me ask French president, his wife is far older, so do others marry younger women, any one you want, do. Marry whosoever you deem fit, good luc
|Re: How Important Is It To Marry A Younger Lady As Wife ? by chivera018(f): 5:51pm On Feb 10|
op at your no1 reason,
an aunt of mine got married when she was 18 and up till today she has no child not even a dead one, so marrying some under 30 doesn't guarantee you children.
You should marry someone that respects you and vice-versa, someone that has good character and someone that is compatible with you in every aspect.
|Re: How Important Is It To Marry A Younger Lady As Wife ? by toksbisola: 6:36pm On Feb 10|
@OP; when a man finds a good wife; it’s like he’s found a precious pearl or better still a precious diamond.
I tell you a little story. I know of a woman who is about 10 years older than her husband and guess what; they have been married for more than 30 something years and still counting and she doesn’t even look older than her husband. They have children as well and all their children are now married. Her husband saw a woman whom he could spend the rest of his life with and he did not let the age gap nor culture which may frown at the age difference hinder him from marrying her.
I know in some cultures, it’ll be hard especially since the logic is usually for the man to be older than the woman. But sometimes when you follow this logic, and end up with a younger woman, she might be one that would deal with you mercilessly through her character.
These factors below should guide you in deciding if you would marry a woman and not necessarily because she is either younger, older or your age mate;
Is she caring?
Is she decent?
Is she hardworking?
Is she supportive?
Is she respectful?
Is she a homely person whom you know can comfortable look after you, the child/ren you would bear as well as the home-front?
Are you both compatible?
Does she love you?
Do you see her as a lady who wouldn't nag?
Do you have a similar outlook in life?
Now taking your points individually;
1. There is some element of truth in your statement but not 100% as there are many women that married in their early/ mid-twenties and they are/were unable to bear children. For some, they had to wait into their late 30’s/40’s even though they married in their twenties before they could bear children. What would you say about that? It just shows you never know what can happen; hence, you CAN’T AND SHOULDN’T CONCLUDE that women mostly have child bearing problems from their 30’s onward. A TOTALLY WRONG ASSERTION/MINDSET TO HAVE.
2. Again, your statement has some elements of truth but not 100% as some women might not look their age as they grow older due to different factors; genetics being one of them, having a good diet being another factor etc. With advancement in technology, health treatments and having a good health routine, a lot of women now age gracefully; hence, you might not need to worry too much about her looking older than you in 15 years’ time.
3. One more time, some elements of truth in your statement but not 100% as long as she knows not to use the age gap to disrespect you and you in return not to use that as an obstacle to chastise or castigate her; then I don’t see why you should limit yourself to only younger women and not date your age mate simply because the society at large might frown at the age difference.
Lastly, the decision is yours entirely whether to marry your age-mate or a younger woman and no one else should make that decision for you. You will be the one to live with her when you marry her; hence be careful not to focus on the influence of others.
I rest my case
PS: You made mention of a close person to you who has had 2 failed marriages given you advise. No disrespect, but I am trying to understand why he didn’t take his own advice and save the second marriage at least he should have learnt from what ended his first marriage and not allow his second marriage to end as well. (No offense and hope non taken).
15 Likes 2 Shares
|Re: How Important Is It To Marry A Younger Lady As Wife ? by dollytino4real(f): 9:28pm On Feb 10|
4 fresh blood
|Re: How Important Is It To Marry A Younger Lady As Wife ? by ElsonMorali: 9:44pm On Feb 10|
Marry the woman you love and can't live without irrespective of age.
|Re: How Important Is It To Marry A Younger Lady As Wife ? by Biglittlelois(f): 9:54pm On Feb 10|
Good character, compatibility and love is all you need, age doesn't matter.
|Re: How Important Is It To Marry A Younger Lady As Wife ? by Omoluabi16(m): 10:08pm On Feb 10|
Age does not really matter, even if you were born on the same day. If she can have children for you, and make you then you're good to go.
|Re: How Important Is It To Marry A Younger Lady As Wife ? by Oldiesgoodies(f): 10:13pm On Feb 10|
I have a family friend who is 34 and engaged his woman who is 33, according to him she is intelligent and gives him peace of mind!
I’m sure you know deep down what you want so trust your instincts and go for it to avoid too much thoughts that will keep confusing and prolonging your decision making.
|Re: How Important Is It To Marry A Younger Lady As Wife ? by Nobody: 11:22pm On Feb 10|
|Re: How Important Is It To Marry A Younger Lady As Wife ? by EVILFOREST: 11:28pm On Feb 10|
Just RESPECT yourself and marry a very young LADY. People will come here to pacify you with STORIES that will amaze you about marrying age mate.
The truth is that most matured ladies have been through a lot and with increasing AGE, there’s usually a decline in Productivity. Just respect yourself. Don’t fall Prey.
PROVIDED you are going in with the Sole Aim of having KIDS and COMPANIONSHIP, Please Marry a very YOUNG LADY.
Don’t ever compromise.
Also make sure the LADY’s FAMILY is a little bit buoyant and self-sustainable.
Don’t compromise because the insult a Gainfully employed wife will give you after marriage will never be measured to what a SIT AT HOME LADY will deliver to your face.
It’s better you entertain insults from a Gainfully employed WIFE than from a wretched Lady, who has failed to understand how much you work to put food on the TABLE.
INSULTS will always come in Marriage so be prepared for them. LADIES never relent in dishing out abuses to their husbands from time to time.
I have SPOKEN, ask other married MEN
1 Like 1 Share
|Re: How Important Is It To Marry A Younger Lady As Wife ? by ogawisdom(m): 8:51am On Feb 11|
Age is important, there is always menapause in woman. As a rule DNT marry someone u didn't give at least 5yrs.
But then again character can't be over emphasized coupled with productivity. Love and mutual respect is key.
Ladies are more real with their character below 28. Old cargoes 28 plus will practically worship u but DNT get carried away it's their desperation to settle down.
Once u marry them u go see pepper but not all ooo there are some exception just be careful. When u are wrong she is apologizing na pretension na later u go see full package
|Re: How Important Is It To Marry A Younger Lady As Wife ? by realtalk19(f): 4:12pm On Feb 11|
1. Ability to have children is not by age but GOds grace.it Wil shock u that even the younger lady may have fertility issues or abortion complications while the older lady may conceive immediately.
2. ageing has to do with genes. there are some 18years old that look 25 while some 35 year old still look 25 even after having kids. good grooming and eating healthy also helps.so age doesn't determine ageing.
3. giving of respect dosnt come with age,it will surprise you that the younger lady will be so rude , nasty and annoying just like an older lady. respect is an attitude or a behavioral act.
my opinion is a happy,successful and peaceful marriage take two to make it work.even u still have your flaws and no one is perfect.
studying ur spouse and understanding each other as best friends and partners. study her reactions to issues and be observant too. make up is not inner beauty. let ur partner have the same view and genuine feeling for u.
be prayerful too and ask God to direct ur very own spouse to you.it may be younger or same age.it dosnt matter.what matters is a peaceful and successful marriage filled with understanding and love.
|Re: How Important Is It To Marry A Younger Lady As Wife ? by koyyes: 12:23am On Feb 12|
Poster, ignore the 2 mad touts that commented before the last person.
It is their type that won't mind marrying their mother's age mate for green card or will run away when their unfortunate wife gives birth to triplets.
Listen to what others have said.
Presently, it has been discovered that 40% of a woman's inability to conceive is caused by the husband.
Don't let the menopause scare fool you. A lot of young males are developing low sperm count.
I know a lot of females who married at 35-40+ years and have up to 3 kids.
There is a man in his 30's who went to marry a fresh secondary school graduate thinking he was playing god....The both of them are still trying for a kid after more than 4 years. Mean while, women older than her that just got married yesterday are shooting out kids.
It is only a woman who goes through a lot of stress over a long period of time that ages faster. People who harp on the ageing matter are always the kind of people used to suffering and make others go through it.
A respectful person does not have to know your age to give it. That is just lame...and shouldn't even be used to make a point.
Folks advising you will not be there to solve your marital woes like that unrepentant divorced friend claiming smart.
Pick someone who gives you peace of mind and move on.
3 Likes 1 Share
|Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health |
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket
Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2019 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 125