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Stats: 2,214,685 members, 4,835,121 topics. Date: Tuesday, 26 March 2019 at 09:17 AM
|Warning Guys Do Not Marry Because Of Money by amliftedhigher: 6:38am On Feb 13|
My cousin got a very good job in a federal establishment in 2016. Among his fellow new staff was this beautiful girl. My cousin calculated the salaries of both incase he marries her and the thing makes sense to him, he started proposing for the girl without proper knowledge of her and her family. Finally they got married during the traditional marriage there was a heavy crisis, also during the church wedding a day to the main day another big crisis started that wanted to end the marriage but we all intervern so that the wedding can hold. Finally they wedded and becomes husband and wife.
Before the wedding, my cousin has already bought a car for himself and the girl before the wedding had bought a car for the father. This guy wanted a house of their own for comfort and luxury, he went and borrowed money to buy a land and build a house which both of them are living in with their only daughter. Because of the money he borrowed to build the house, his salary at the end of the month is not up to 70k again because he is paying the loan from his salary.
I was shocked when I had recently that the wife doesn't assist him in the up keep of the house. Immediately salaries are paid, they finished eating his 70k salary, no food for the house again except the wife is cooking for her daughter and sisters living with her.
The wife went as far as buying an SUV with her father without the husbands knowledge, only to drive the car to her husbands house as her own car and my cousin was dumbfounded. All these while they have been living in crisis oh till now that divorce is the only option. Just 2 years of marriage.
Who is at fault?
To me my cousin is at fault for marrying an unknown girl from unknown family simply because she has money.
Now all her wife earnings are being invested by her father and mother not even her husband.
Someone like me failed to pregnant a senators daughter when I was in year one in the University. The lady in question wants me to marry her me that came from a poor family marrying a senators daughter because of money God forbid.
My Brothers out there do not marry out of pity and do not marry a lady because of money.
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|Re: Warning Guys Do Not Marry Because Of Money by Firestarrr: 7:02am On Feb 13|
Look before you leap as the saying goes.
|Re: Warning Guys Do Not Marry Because Of Money by Davash222(m): 7:05am On Feb 13|
amliftedhigher:Were you cursed not to marry from a wealthy family If I’m your father, I’ll disown you.
|Re: Warning Guys Do Not Marry Because Of Money by Obascoetubi: 7:09am On Feb 13|
and ladies will marry because of money abi?
|Re: Warning Guys Do Not Marry Because Of Money by DavidEsq(m): 7:10am On Feb 13|
Dis kain early morning, person don get headache because of OP crazy English. . Abeg who get panadol?
|Re: Warning Guys Do Not Marry Because Of Money by Davash222(m): 7:13am On Feb 13|
That woman ain’t richer than your cousin. You said they worked in the same office. Just that your cousin had an investment that’s weighing him down a little bit. While, the wife spend hers on liabilities. To you, you think the girl is richer cos she bought car and showing off.
Your cousin would bounce back for sure, but he should ensure the woman ain’t there then.
|Re: Warning Guys Do Not Marry Because Of Money by ogawisdom(m): 8:13am On Feb 13|
The thing with working women is arrogance.
Op, so women should marry working men while men should marry jobless women abi.
The point is that a bad woman is a bad woman weather rich, poor, educated, uneducated, jobless or gainfully employed. It's in her character and upbringing. Na bad market. Like you have never seen a pauper woman fight the hubby every morning to give her money for whatever.
The place I will fault your friend is in building a house on loan without carrying her wife along on its implications as per how responsibilities will be shared until he pays off the loan. If this was discussed the stand of the woman would have been known n he will weigh his options before going for loan.
Wait ooo did you say she bought SUV without the man's knowledge, she has crossed the red line n a married woman can't buy a property without the knowledge of the husband.
Both of them should sit down and discuss their finances and share their bills/responsibilities.
Lesson - Even if u marry a woman for money never never never depend on a woman for money even if u lost your job it never works because women are like children and extremely selfish, u buy sweets for a child n he/she will refuse to give u some u open a supermarket for a woman and she will refuse to contribute to family expenses from it lol
There are some exceptions like my wife though who takes joy in contributing to family expenses even when u tell them to keep their money they won't hear
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|Re: Warning Guys Do Not Marry Because Of Money by francdec4(m): 9:22am On Feb 13|
Thank God always for that woman you married. Life pressures shouldn't be carried by one person in anyway....it's daunting. Peace bro.
|Re: Warning Guys Do Not Marry Because Of Money by LordKO(m): 11:26am On Feb 13|
Your cousin is married to his own frenemy - a headstrong woman. She's an egotist - a developed or developing sociopath. Egotists (be they women or men) believe in marriage, but they do not believe in oneness in marriage - as a woman self-centeredness and contentiousness will remain her major hallmark. Her type personifies subjugation - even if she's meek. He ought to have known that submissiveness is the least thing to expect from her since she's economically emancipated - of course, when he becomes more financially stable than her, or if she loses her economic power, she'll take to hypocritical disingenuousness, like a feeble-minded woman (economic-impaired egoist or narcissist), to remain in his good book.
In fact, he should prepare for the worst, so long as she remains economically strong, because his goodness (as much as she will enjoy and long to retain it without reciprocating same) can never be enough for her. He has the choice to either become perpetually subjugable to her or he should go for separation (she will like and initiate this option if peradventure he loses his economic power completely, she'll take a walk with the offspring), if he values his inner peace. Equality can never be enough for her, she wants to reign supreme over him - as she has started - and establish a separate kingdom while still being covered by his crown. Abomination.
Being a working class woman, or financially independent woman, isn't enough. Strong-minded women will always remain gold.
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|Re: Warning Guys Do Not Marry Because Of Money by amliftedhigher: 12:15pm On Feb 13|
Davash222:For sure but the fact is that she bought a car for her self without the knowledge of her husband. She went to market with her father and bought the car. She doesn't help her husband in terms of money but she is living with her in the house that impoverished her husband.
The latest info now is that she told the husband that she will not live in another person house with him that she should go and build his own house
|Re: Warning Guys Do Not Marry Because Of Money by amliftedhigher: 12:20pm On Feb 13|
ogawisdom:They both agreed before he took the loan to build the house. In fact she told him that she would not live in another man's house and that he should build a house so the guy proceeds and took a loan.
Yes she bought a car with her father without the husband knowledge.
|Re: Warning Guys Do Not Marry Because Of Money by amliftedhigher: 12:22pm On Feb 13|
Breaking news : My cousin just sold the house now and had paid for rent to pack in tomorrow.
This means that the marriage is almost over.
|Re: Warning Guys Do Not Marry Because Of Money by amliftedhigher: 12:24pm On Feb 13|
|Re: Warning Guys Do Not Marry Because Of Money by lilmax(m): 12:24pm On Feb 13|
your cousin married the wrong woman
your cousin lacks the ability to plan for the future
your cousin doesn’t make right choices
this has nothing to do with marrying for money
|Re: Warning Guys Do Not Marry Because Of Money by Katier00(f): 12:36pm On Feb 13|
Is your name cousin
|Re: Warning Guys Do Not Marry Because Of Money by Elderlucifer: 12:43pm On Feb 13|
Just say your cousin married a woman like pocohantas of nairaland.
|Re: Warning Guys Do Not Marry Because Of Money by Acidosis(m): 4:00pm On Feb 13|
All those that intervened are the major problems. You all went to intervene for the wrong reasons. Y'all were more concerned about the consequences of cancelling the wedding (money spent, shame, etc.) than solving the actual problems.
You see the result of your interventions?
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|Re: Warning Guys Do Not Marry Because Of Money by ogawisdom(m): 6:46pm On Feb 13|
amliftedhigher:. this is quite tough but divorce is not an option yet except she starts cheating ie infidelity. It's just 2 yrs give it up to 5 years n then decide what to do . Divorce should be the last option on the table except she wants to kill u or she is f ucking around.
The man should manage to feed himself n co exist with her for now at least she can feed herself n allow u access her puci for now
She is being influenced by her Dad n others, to win her u should break her away from bad advisers.
I don't believe in taking loan to build a house that is not an investment, build when u have the money n rent until then.
|Re: Warning Guys Do Not Marry Because Of Money by DukeofNZ: 7:26pm On Feb 13|
Queen i know say u no go ever be like dis poster's cousin's wife. u be asanma nwaayi oma
|Re: Warning Guys Do Not Marry Because Of Money by Katier00(f): 7:29pm On Feb 13|
DukeofNZ:I can't be like that. Thank you nwokeoma
|Re: Warning Guys Do Not Marry Because Of Money by EVILFOREST: 9:19pm On Feb 13|
Your BROTHER didn’t CALCULATE well.
He married a STAR from a WRETCHED home.
That’s the PROBLEM.
MEN of nowadays try as much as possible to avoid families with so much DEPENDENTS.
He forgot to ask before leaping, because most LADIES in such Category tend to drag all the family members along.
Some even CHASE HUSBANDS out of the HOME with RELATIVES everywhere.
Don’t always be in a RUSH even when the Lady has so much to offer. STUDY her home closely.
OBSERVE those that have been trained and the ones that are currently on the supplementary list of being trained...
Check your POCKET.
If she hails from a FAIRLY comfortable HOME, even if she fails to support you after marriage, the JOY remains that at least she can support herself and leave you in PEACE.
|Re: Warning Guys Do Not Marry Because Of Money by NoToPile: 9:20pm On Feb 13|
Why would he sell the house?
Thats not a smart decision if you ask me
|Re: Warning Guys Do Not Marry Because Of Money by crackhaus: 11:03pm On Feb 13|
amliftedhigher:This story is not enough to justify anything, its an outlier and cannot predict a general outcome.
As a rule of thumb in this day and age, brothers ought to marry women with stable careers and incomes.
What you should be advising is don't rush into something as important as marriage, get to know your partner, get to know her family, get to know her friends, get to know HER.
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|Re: Warning Guys Do Not Marry Because Of Money by Goodnewsbearer: 7:20am On Feb 14|
Na one chance your cousin entered so.
|Re: Warning Guys Do Not Marry Because Of Money by stag: 9:10am On Feb 14|
Mr Cousin hurriedly began a building project because his wife told him she can not live with him in a rented house?
Well, I have no advice though but I keep wondering how people can judge a marital case this strong without hearing the other side of the coin.
A lot of men get intimidated by a financially independent woman. I think men should learn to be comfortable in their own skin when around ladies from wealthy homes.
This doesn’t look to me as a woman from a wealthy home showing off to her husband. More like there’s a weakness she’s exploiting. A weakness even a broke wife will equally exploit. Just that the financially dependent wife’s response to his weaknesses will manifest in a different form. A bad woman is a bad woman.
Every woman with money mustn’t be bad.
And to think Mr Cousin retracted his steps and sold? Pitiful.
|Re: Warning Guys Do Not Marry Because Of Money by generationz(f): 2:11pm On Feb 14|
ah aha h
this is hilarious . You know why?
just yesterday there was a story on front page about a guy who wants to dump his girlfriend that supported him totally right from when he was broke.
She never asks for transport money, bought gifts for his family, bought a land for him where they started farming and supported his plans to travel abroad financially.
Let me laugh very well.
You people think marriage is easy
Can two walk together except they be agree Amos 3vs 3
op ,I wonder what your cousin was looking at when he was dating this lady.
She is obviously being influenced By her family nothing more.
All those problems encountered during the traditional and white weeding where signs of impeding doom to call of the wedding
All you lots considered where material things.
How do you want to fight her papa and mama now.
Let me laugh again.
|Re: Warning Guys Do Not Marry Because Of Money by amliftedhigher: 3:16pm On Feb 14|
stag:Information reaching us yesterday is that 2 people who knew the lady's mother warned my cousin not to marry the girl because of her mothers character but he refused.
Remember that they worked in the same company so all the workers have heard the divorce information including the gate men. The girl has already changed her surname back to her fathers name.
|Re: Warning Guys Do Not Marry Because Of Money by Precial419: 6:43pm On Feb 14|
This your story self let me just believe it. Both married for different reasons and sorry maybe that's what your cousin told and made you believe but a guy that is already stable financially would not want to depend on his wife as support unless he's moral and mind standing is weak. And then there is no communication between the both of them. I don't know why your cousin sold the house because down the line, he would have something to depend on. Whether you like it or not most women want their men to be responsible for everything without her input and her is meant for her. These are things that should be discussed before the marriage. So he wasn't dating any girl before getting that job abi? Maybe it was karma bleeping his ass up.
|Re: Warning Guys Do Not Marry Because Of Money by Toseenlove: 8:50am On Feb 15|
Your English fit Scatter peeson Head.
|Re: Warning Guys Do Not Marry Because Of Money by djon78: 1:10pm On Feb 15|
If woman wants to keep her own thing, then men should not dare marrying such type of women.
My mum retired as a top civil servant, but she greatly helped and assisted her husband in supporting the home.
Presently my sister who runs her own company, supports her home. The husband is a big man, but she still supports, in fact, the husband put a lot of investment in her company, and the business is doing well with branches around different locations in Lagos.
But with her success they no born her well to misbehave, disrespect or not support her family. Like many women today wey even get small change do.
Men should not look at women's money, men should work hard, be wise, smart and very calculative.
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