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Help! I Am Not Emotionally Attached To My Fiancee - Romance (7) - Nairaland

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Re: Help! I Am Not Emotionally Attached To My Fiancee by Avast(m): 8:51am On Feb 14, 2019
Dammylois:
Stop keeping her for selfish gains op.... Go find the One you're emotionally attached to and let her find her man. The earlier the better

Ma, the truth is men are polygamous in nature. if he likes, he should go ahead and marry someone he is 100% emotionally attached to, he will always want to taste others.

1 Like

Re: Help! I Am Not Emotionally Attached To My Fiancee by Avast(m): 8:53am On Feb 14, 2019
Armour:
Op..your challenge may probably be that you are seeing someone else (a side chick) who is giving you more sexual satisfaction than she does. An industrious and virtuous lady such as described by you are not usually good in bed as they are mostly consumed with what they do.

My advice .. Beauty fades and Cassava will turn to carrot but he who finds a wife, finds a good things and obtain favor. Do not make a mistake as you may end up regretting in the future.

If this makes sense to you. Pls click like

God bless your entire generations
Re: Help! I Am Not Emotionally Attached To My Fiancee by Rahyberg(m): 8:57am On Feb 14, 2019
Big bro, I have once bee in your shoe before. I had two gals whom I was to choose who to build a relationship with.. Let me list out the qualities of them out for you.

Gal 1: she is beautiful, intelligent, hardworking, supportive and prayerful. Her flaws are she is prone to anger, she isnt that a devoted Muslim. She loves me more than I do

Gal 2: with the little time we spent together, she is also beautiful, intelligent, Prayerful and a devoted Muslim.I loved her more than she does.

Back to my point, I neva love Gal 1, I only saw her as a friend.. Gal 1 keeps on with her ministry fkr mi while I keep on pursuing Gal 2..

I sat down one day and think of which of the gal should I b serious with. I choose gal 1 because she loves me more than I do. And had to develop the love for her..
To God b the glory, I made the best decision because I now love her wholeheartedly..

Bro, keep on with her, try to develop the love.. I asuure u , u'll love her more than u expect. But before that, u appreciate your similarities and Respect your Differences.

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: Help! I Am Not Emotionally Attached To My Fiancee by XaintJoel20: 9:05am On Feb 14, 2019
Rahyberg:
Big bro, I have once bee in your shoe before. I had two gals whom I was to choose who to build a relationship with.. Let me list out the qualities of them out for you.

Gal 1: she is beautiful, intelligent, hardworking, supportive and prayerful. Her flaws are she is prone to anger, she isnt that a devoted Muslim. She loves me more than I do

Gal 2: with the little time we spent together, she is also beautiful, intelligent, Prayerful and a devoted Muslim.I loved her more than she does.

Back to my point, I neva love Gal 1, I only saw her as a friend.. Gal 1 keeps on with her ministry fkr mi while I keep on pursuing Gal 2..

I sat down one day and think of which of the gal should I b serious with. I choose gal 1 because she loves me more than I do. And had to develop the love for her..
To God b the glory, I made the best decision because I now love her wholeheartedly..

Bro, keep on with her, try to develop the love.. I asuure u , u'll love her more than u expect. But before that, u appreciate your similarities and Respect your Differences.

Thanks bro...
Re: Help! I Am Not Emotionally Attached To My Fiancee by andycom(m): 9:12am On Feb 14, 2019
XaintJoel20:



I would have done that long before now, but I still think she is too good to let go just like that.

I think I should tell you some few things you should know about her:
After our service year I was struggling to get a job and she advice I set up a business and helped with about 50% of the capital with which I started my current business.

When we started, she bought a large plot of land in my state and just recently developing the plot for agricultural use.

On all the occasion she has visited me in my state, she has done so with her money and also getting plenty of goodies for me and my family.

Just recently, she bought into my lifelong plan of travelling out of the country. She has put visible plan on ground for us to leave the country soon after our wedding.

The truth, is that when I think of her inbuilt qualities, I am force to believe I will be on the losing side if she fails into the hands of someone else.
That's why I said I am in a dilemma.


so we have this kind of ladies in Nigeria!!
Re: Help! I Am Not Emotionally Attached To My Fiancee by Ugosample(m): 9:12am On Feb 14, 2019
pocohantas:


He isn't emotionally attached, but he is financially attached grin

Last last, he will marry one slayqueen that will deal with him. He will na come online and be disturbing us with philosophical quotes.

If you don't want someone, why not let him/her go? He has refused to do that. This same guy will meet another girl tomorrow and marry her in a week, while spending on her. You can never understand these sons of Adam... undecided

this poco sef undecided


You too like trouble cheesy grin
Re: Help! I Am Not Emotionally Attached To My Fiancee by jookunlaja(m): 9:16am On Feb 14, 2019
Having read your story, I noticed that you and i, have many things in common.
1. Even to buy food from the Canteen, I find it very hard to arrive at a perfect conclusion. I also most times regret my decisions.
My present wife and mother of my children was also like your girl, bros. We met while in school without any string attached whatsoever, she was just a good Christian friend. She does not have any of the physical/beautiful qualities I love and desire in a wife material. I hate short, dark, no boobs, no backside ladies.
In actual fact, she was totally the exact opposite of everything I desire in a lady physically. However, when it comes to emotional and psychological strength and wisdom. She has double Phd in that. She is the desire of all my friends. In fact, she has many who love her for these qualities. Though physical beauty, she no get for my eye. Since there was no emotional attachment between us, we always discuss our sexual escapades. I tell her about my new toast and likewise she lets me in into hers also.
As church people, we also pray and fast for God to give us good spouses. we attend programmes together. Remember, no single sexual attachment or string between us. She is someone I can sleep with on the bed and feel no single sexual feeling chemical for.
We were just platonic friends until each of us began to experience serious heartbreaks from potential dates.
We continued to pray until we realized that God meant us for each other. Even my friends who were not Christians were begging me to marry her.
Remember there was no single sexual attachment between us. And that was the main reason I said I can never marry her. In fact,any time I have thought about marrying her, I always bind and cast out the evil thought, saying what type of rubbish is that. However, after praying and confirming that she's God will for me and I accepted with a lot of cries and tears, I cant really explain how I started falling in love with her With time, our emotional bond began to grow and I started having sexual desire or emotional attachment towards her.
Though it was not easy growing inlove with her at the beginning, but with time, we are now like five and six.
However, I cant advise you that your case may be like mine but you are the architect of your life.
Take time to think over this issue so that you wont regret till the end of your life. I have people who are regretting presently. You can decide to go on or break off. its your choice. You cant make your decisions based on my own personal experience. Experiences are quite individualistic and personal. However, people can grow in love and also love can grow wane after some years.
However, if she is as great and good as you painted, then you might just take a blind leap. But if you feel you can get someone better, especially in the area of emotional connection, then you can find a way to peacefully break off from her.
But the handwriting on the wall is favourable and nice from my personal perspective.
Make your decisions on time and don't waste her time and life.
Till date, I always find it hard to arrive at a decision I wont regret after taking it. I buy this shoe today, tomorrow I regret that oh, I should have taken the other design. I walked for almost two hours recently looking for a simple men's wear and I could not get one that would satisfy me. God will help us boo

7 Likes 3 Shares

Re: Help! I Am Not Emotionally Attached To My Fiancee by Nobody: 9:17am On Feb 14, 2019
Nothing new.

A lot of mentally imbalanced negros like you are suffering the same problem because God is at work and he will never allow a clueless human being to end up with a lady that deserves better.

Let her go and meet who deserves her and pick any of those your olosho neighbor girls you have been looking at. Na dem fit person like you because you love chaos.

1 Like

Re: Help! I Am Not Emotionally Attached To My Fiancee by sacramento1212: 9:20am On Feb 14, 2019
XaintJoel20:



I would have done that long before now, but I still think she is too good to let go just like that.

I think I should tell you some few things you should know about her:
After our service year I was struggling to get a job and she advice I set up a business and helped with about 50% of the capital with which I started my current business.

When we started, she bought a large plot of land in my state and just recently developing the plot for agricultural use.

On all the occasion she has visited me in my state, she has done so with her money and also getting plenty of goodies for me and my family.

Just recently, she bought into my lifelong plan of travelling out of the country. She has put visible plan on ground for us to leave the country soon after our wedding.

The truth, is that when I think of her inbuilt qualities, I am force to believe I will be on the losing side if she fails into the hands of someone else.
That's why I said I am in a dilemma.

I sincerely do not know what part of this lady that makes you have a second thought about her. From your analysis, she's a good woman you have there. How many of the ladies we have today will have such qualities?

Or you will rather fall in love with a liability, a disrespectful lady, one that doesn't have any form of regard to you and your family? Not all that glitters is gold ooooo. This lady is completely loyal to you and that's what you need now. If you allow her go, you definitely will regret this action of yours.

You better stay put and start praying to God or Allah to sow a seed of love for her in you. Something many out there are seriously praying for but you already have without much efforts?

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Help! I Am Not Emotionally Attached To My Fiancee by hustla(m): 9:21am On Feb 14, 2019
Originalsly:


Hmmm....isn't this the bone of contention?...the root of the problem?.... the real reason for you being on the fence?.....that she is better educated? ....the fear of a better educated wife who would more likely earn a whole lot more than you?.... and in your mind the one who earns more is the one who controls the family? If you're not emotionally attached why not help her find a deserving husband?....why not?


It obviously is. She's richer and more educated... Probably more intelligent than he is

He's starting to have low self esteem cheesy

2 Likes

Re: Help! I Am Not Emotionally Attached To My Fiancee by mechanics(m): 9:44am On Feb 14, 2019
Bros it's better you marry someone you are emotionally attached to, if you marry her and say later you will love her, it will be risky venture.

1 Like

Re: Help! I Am Not Emotionally Attached To My Fiancee by Nobody: 10:05am On Feb 14, 2019
OMEGA009:



You’re just a greedy bastardddd that’s preying on a naive girl and GOD will pay you in your own coin. You will marry a biatch and she’ll make your life a living hell. Infect you with an incurable disease and leave you to die alone like the wretched foooool you are. E-diot

shocked

1 Like

Re: Help! I Am Not Emotionally Attached To My Fiancee by Akuruoulo(m): 10:06am On Feb 14, 2019
Why describe her as fiancee when you aren't emotionally attracted to her.
Stop fooling around

1 Like

Re: Help! I Am Not Emotionally Attached To My Fiancee by Sectis(m): 10:07am On Feb 14, 2019
Wait.... Does this girl has strong mouth odors
Re: Help! I Am Not Emotionally Attached To My Fiancee by XaintJoel20: 10:27am On Feb 14, 2019
jookunlaja:
Having read your story, I noticed that you and i, have many things in common.
1. Even to buy food from the Canteen, I find it very hard to arrive at a perfect conclusion. I also most times regret my decisions.
My present wife and mother of my children was also like your girl, bros. We met while in school without any string attached whatsoever, she was just a good Christian friend. She does not have any of the physical/beautiful qualities I love and desire in a wife material. I hate short, dark, no boobs, no backside ladies.
In actual fact, she was totally the exact opposite of everything I desire in a lady physically. However, when it comes to emotional and psychological strength and wisdom. She has double Phd in that. She is the desire of all my friends. In fact, she has many who love her for these qualities. Though physical beauty, she no get for my eye. Since there was no emotional attachment between us, we always discuss our sexual escapades. I tell her about my new toast and likewise she lets me in into hers also.
As church people, we also pray and fast for God to give us good spouses. we attend programmes together. Remember, no single sexual attachment or string between us. She is someone I can sleep with on the bed and feel no single sexual feeling chemical for.
We were just platonic friends until each of us began to experience serious heartbreaks from potential dates.
We continued to pray until we realized that God meant us for each other. Even my friends who were not Christians were begging me to marry her.
Remember there was no single sexual attachment between us. And that was the main reason I said I can never marry her. In fact,any time I have thought about marrying her, I always bind and cast out the evil thought, saying what type of rubbish is that. However, after praying and confirming that she's God will for me and I accepted with a lot of cries and tears, I cant really explain how I started falling in love with her With time, our emotional bond began to grow and I started having sexual desire or emotional attachment towards her.
Though it was not easy growing inlove with her at the beginning, but with time, we are now like five and six.
However, I cant advise you that your case may be like mine but you are the architect of your life.
Take time to think over this issue so that you wont regret till the end of your life. I have people who are regretting presently. You can decide to go on or break off. its your choice. You cant make your decisions based on my own personal experience. Experiences are quite individualistic and personal. However, people can grow in love and also love can grow wane after some years.
However, if she is as great and good as you painted, then you might just take a blind leap. But if you feel you can get someone better, especially in the area of emotional connection, then you can find a way to peacefully break off from her.
But the handwriting on the wall is favourable and nice from my personal perspective.
Make your decisions on time and don't waste her time and life.
Till date, I always find it hard to arrive at a decision I wont regret after taking it. I buy this shoe today, tomorrow I regret that oh, I should have taken the other design. I walked for almost two hours recently looking for a simple men's wear and I could not get one that would satisfy me. God will help us boo

I can't thank you enough for this wonderful advice.
May God bless you richly.

It's because of people like you I had to post this, if peradventure I will get good advice. I must confess I have gotten the much needed advice...
Re: Help! I Am Not Emotionally Attached To My Fiancee by coming2america: 10:34am On Feb 14, 2019
A case of when the prsferable is not available, the available becomes the preferable
Re: Help! I Am Not Emotionally Attached To My Fiancee by galantjoe(m): 10:47am On Feb 14, 2019
Go and marry her sharp sharp. She is your wife. But devil is covering your eye With yeye girl

2 Likes

Re: Help! I Am Not Emotionally Attached To My Fiancee by Adescopapa: 10:49am On Feb 14, 2019
I understand this guy small, he is shy of the good things this lady possesses and thinking he's not meant for her. But brother, have also felt into this kind of scenario but I'll like you to marry her. I was in 400l when I married my wife (she was serving then) and we're happy together. I thought many things wch am sure is going through your mind now but bro, opportunity lost might never be gotten again. Hope you understand

1 Like

Re: Help! I Am Not Emotionally Attached To My Fiancee by pocohantas(f): 11:18am On Feb 14, 2019
Ugosample:


this poco sef undecided


You too like trouble cheesy grin

Wetin I do again na?
Happy Val biko grin
Re: Help! I Am Not Emotionally Attached To My Fiancee by Lizzydavinci(f): 11:20am On Feb 14, 2019
XaintJoel20:



I would have done that long before now, but I still think she is too good to let go just like that.

I think I should tell you some few things you should know about her:
After our service year I was struggling to get a job and she advice I set up a business and helped with about 50% of the capital with which I started my current business.

When we started, she bought a large plot of land in my state and just recently developing the plot for agricultural use.

On all the occasion she has visited me in my state, she has done so with her money and also getting plenty of goodies for me and my family.

Just recently, she bought into my lifelong plan of travelling out of the country. She has put visible plan on ground for us to leave the country soon after our wedding.

The truth, is that when I think of her inbuilt qualities, I am force to believe I will be on the losing side if she fails into the hands of someone else.
That's why I said I am in a dilemma.

With what you describe here about her, I can't help but think that you're lucky to have someone like her in your life, someone that cares about you, your future and your well being. If you don't appreciate what you have and try to embrace it, you may loose her to someone else that will, and I tell you it will kill you when u watch her be great with someone else.

2 Likes

Re: Help! I Am Not Emotionally Attached To My Fiancee by tabithababy(f): 11:21am On Feb 14, 2019
Fooling girl using her hard earned to take care of a guy who does not love her embarassed


Poor girl cheesy

Last last, op will go and marry another Lady and be using proceeds from the foolish girl to take care of his beloved wife grin cheesy
Re: Help! I Am Not Emotionally Attached To My Fiancee by Biglittlelois(f): 11:35am On Feb 14, 2019
elantraceey:
Op I see you as a gold digger, you love what she can offer but you don't love her person, please let that lady go and get someone that'll truly love and appreciate her, Just because a lady has outstanding qualities doesn't mean she must be your wife , may I not fall into the hands of indecisive men like you.

Amen oo, I pray so for myself too.
Re: Help! I Am Not Emotionally Attached To My Fiancee by Nobody: 11:41am On Feb 14, 2019
Biko, free the girl and don't continue to hold on to her knowingly you don't feel her anymore
Re: Help! I Am Not Emotionally Attached To My Fiancee by Nobody: 11:51am On Feb 14, 2019
XaintJoel20:


She doesn't have any of those "deformities" you listed up there.
She is better educated than myself as she has done her Msc while I am yet to further after by Bsc program.

I think it's a thing of the heart. Even when I try to fake it to make her happy, I know deep down that it's not real...
U need to let that girl go, she deserve better
Re: Help! I Am Not Emotionally Attached To My Fiancee by predatorX: 11:51am On Feb 14, 2019
Don't mind the nigga. I was once like him, always craving after big A.R.S.E, voluptuous B.O.O.B.S, full thighs and HIPS etc. Still do though, but not a the expense of a supportive woman.

The fact that you went after her in the first place and saw something great in her means she appealed to you then. She's not a H.O.E based on your assertions and there are not many of her kind --I mean lots of hoes out there, niccaw!!!

Discipline you lusts and desires because they shall lead you to your doom.

4 Likes

Re: Help! I Am Not Emotionally Attached To My Fiancee by Ugosample(m): 12:11pm On Feb 14, 2019
pocohantas:


Wetin I do again na?
Happy Val biko grin

don't you know that what you said up there will pain the "sshest" of many here??,? grin
Re: Help! I Am Not Emotionally Attached To My Fiancee by Ugosample(m): 12:13pm On Feb 14, 2019
tabithababy:
Fooling girl using her hard earned to take care of a guy who does not love her embarassed


Poor girl cheesy

Last last, op will go and marry another Lady and be using proceeds from the foolish girl to take care of his beloved wife grin cheesy

And the beloved wife will be using the money on a side nigga cheesy cheesy
Re: Help! I Am Not Emotionally Attached To My Fiancee by CCC2(m): 12:24pm On Feb 14, 2019
Either you marry her or not u will still chase women outside. So, forget this excuse and marry a woman that will help your future. Which foolish love are you talking about?

U dont need love, u need a good person.

1 Like

Re: Help! I Am Not Emotionally Attached To My Fiancee by JhyMedex: 1:06pm On Feb 14, 2019
XaintJoel20:


She doesn't have any of those "deformities" you listed up there.
She is better educated than myself as she has done her Msc while I am yet to further after by Bsc program.

I think it's a thing of the heart. Even when I try to fake it to make her happy, I know deep down that it's not real...

There's a way the universe works....n It's really fascinating...I swear u n i r in exactly d same shoe.. I totally get whr u coming from....

as u were describing ur gal I was seeing my gal...All d talk abt leaving d country ..we've talked abt dt too..

Bt like u...i dnt feel emotionally attached to her...She's tall n pretty...doesnt parasite..Excellent cook...intelligent too...

Shocker...I'm almost sure she's spent more on me dan I av on her..she loves me so hard sumtyms it brks my heart ..sumtyms I'm almost moved to tears to tink I dnt love her....On occasion i stay awake at nyt n jst stare at her wen she sleeps..Shes almost perfect...

we've bn 2geda 4 ova 2yrs now..She's gon make a very grt partner..Bt I've bn in luv b4 n d way I felt den...i dnt feel it wit her...

I'm tryna make a decision by dis year's end whether to continue or let her go...But I'm almost sure I'm gon regret it...

Could u tell me ur final decision..mayb dt'll guide me on wat to do to..Tanx boss..

2 Likes

Re: Help! I Am Not Emotionally Attached To My Fiancee by XaintJoel20: 1:38pm On Feb 14, 2019
JhyMedex:


There's a way the universe works....n It's really fascinating...I swear u n i r in exactly d same shoe.. I totally get whr u coming from....

as u were describing ur gal I was seeing my gal...All d talk abt leaving d country ..we've talked abt dt too..

Bt like u...i dnt feel emotionally attached to her...She's tall n pretty...doesnt parasite..Excellent cook...intelligent too...

Shocker...I'm almost sure she's spent more on me dan I av on her..she loves me so hard sumtyms it brks my heart ..sumtyms I'm almost moved to tears to tink I dnt love her....On occasion i stay awake at nyt n jst stare at her wen she sleeps..Shes almost perfect...

we've bn 2geda 4 ova 2yrs now..She's gon make a very grt partner..Bt I've bn in luv b4 n d way I felt den...i dnt feel it wit her...

I'm tryna make a decision by dis year's end whether to continue or let her go...But I'm almost sure I'm gon regret it...

Could u tell me ur final decision..mayb dt'll guide me on wat to do to..Tanx boss..

Hopefully, I will keep you informed.

God will see us through.

1 Like

Re: Help! I Am Not Emotionally Attached To My Fiancee by Ubdavis(m): 1:40pm On Feb 14, 2019
Avast:


maybe he wants olosho.

life can never be straight bro. Let me tell you something, if you marry someone else and she lacks some attitude you cherish from this your girlfriend, you will still blame yourself for letting her go.

Sit down and think about what you really want.

Ur right. No one is infallible.
Re: Help! I Am Not Emotionally Attached To My Fiancee by rosalieene(f): 2:13pm On Feb 14, 2019
No they will not insult the poster but when its the other way round, you lots will bash the female poster.
issorait, continue...

1 Like

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