https://www.nairaland.com/4191052/should-cover-up-hes-addicted

First of all happy new month...
May this month bring what we have been praying for to us... Amen

Its a lengthy one but its important, someone might need it

This was a topic I posted on 23th November 2017. My brothers battery life style after a few period of loving ...


Happened again yesterday... This time it was worst because the girl has anger issues like my brother...

They have been dating for over a year now and I was calmly telling my elder brother how aggressive this lady was because the signs were glaring but he said he was going to continue because atleast she will teach him how to calm down that he wants to learn how not to be a woman beater. I kept my cool for months...


Last month he told me how the girl cheated on her and he caught her red handed and even the friends confirmed it that she slept with someone in the friends compound and they did not want to tell him because they saw that he was loving her the more everyday but since he has found out she's a cheat that he should do the needful... He told me the friends were even planning on how to have sex with her in turns behind he's back. She goes to the friends compound anytime she feels like (be careful of people you call friends)

This girl leaves in Benin, we stay in lagos, my brother said he wants her to come to lagos so that a proper break up can happen, I was really mad telling him not to and even my cousin who is a girl and my aunt refused whatever reason he was bringing (one of the reasons is money, she helps him during financial crisis sometimes. Not me oh, I have sense not to fall for that ) but he refused. She came in the night they had sex almost immediately. So many things was going through my mind but I kept my cool, they started forming love birds the next day, I said cool.

I was bathing in the evening when I heard two people exchanging words, it was serious I had to just leave the house for both of them. Turned out she caught my brother cheating too (via text or whatever I couldn't tell). I left them because I don't want to hear non sense

I got calls from neighbors, told me to come and separate fight that they can't put their mouth in boyfriend and girlfriend issues. I came and I separated but I was ashamed because she opened my family and my brother to the whole compound and all who cared to listen, reigned insults on my mum, dad, aunts, even me that was standing there, called her people and was shouting that my brother has killed her.. I swallowed it all because I knew where the problem was coming from. It was really bad.. Even right now I'm crying because the anger in me can't come out because I locked it in... Yes I have anger issues too but I killed it years ago... Thank God for salvation ( yes I preached and we even attend the same church but you know siblings) .

I have been so quiet since yesterday. Landlord has come to warn us. Hearing side talk how they have no respect for me or my brother again (mad man has no shame is the family that carries the shame)

I have decided to start warning any lady that he brings home or that is forming love towards my brother... (Yes he's a fine dude and carries gadgets that easily catches ladies eyes. Eg Iphone x ) the problem is ladies get confused because I'm really cool and my girl and i has never had any open quarrel (we have issues alot but we handle them quietly and yes my girl knows I'm aggressive but she knows exactly how to handle it) so any lady that looks at us paint the picture that my brother will act likewise.

Ladies please study a family well not only the person in particular ask questions especially the ones any of the family member is dating they have a low key truth about the family...

Please what else should I do... I really need to do more because tomorrow it might be battery leading to death of any party

Obviously you've tried everything.
My advice is always be there with him when he starts his battery so you can minimise it or separate it if you can. Because one day water fit pass gari.

E never lead to serious police case thats why,if it has he will mellow.
Trust me,a trial will convince him

Shibaraba:
Obviously you've tried everything.
My advice is always be there with him when he starts his battery so you can minimise it or separate it if you can. Because one day water fit pass gari.

E never lead to serious police case thats why,if it has he will mellow.
Trust me,a trial will convince him

haba i cant be there for him always na... you have a point with the police thing sha, but this is Nigeria the effect might not be much...

bro, i`d advice you to firstly talk to your brother. His anger is inbuilt, i understand but as a man he has to control himself.
Sorry 2 ask but do you guys still live with ur parents? if it's you who pays the rent, i think you should start by giving him conditions to live with you like not bringing in girls but if u live with your parents, maybe u should consider moving out..
Sooner or later he's going to learn to control his anger, make wiser choices and be more responsible but what's going to happen b4 then is what you can't say..


Reason with him, bring him closer and if he doesn't want 2 change, give him space!

psalmsmiles:
bro, i`d advice you to firstly talk to your brother. His anger is inbuilt, i understand but as a man he has to control himself.
Sorry 2 ask but do you guys still live with ur parents? if it's you who pays the rent, i think you should start by giving him conditions to live with you like not bringing in girls but if u live with your parents, maybe u should consider moving out..
Sooner or later he's going to learn to control his anger, make wiser choices and be more responsible but what's going to happen b4 then is what you can't say..


Reason with him, bring him closer and if he doesn't want 2 change, give him space!

actually we stay alone... Its a two bedroom flat, he stays on he's side and me on mine. He pays more bills because he earns more apart from that every other thing you have written there I have done it... I almost ruined my reputation in church because the first time he came he got a fling with one of a vabriant sister and broke the girls heart... I wish he could start now... Because he should be married by now... Can't babysit forever

iphi:
haba i cant be there for him always na... you have a point with the police thing sha, but this is Nigeria the effect might not be much...

So how old exactly is your brother who has an iPhone, brings girls into the house to bang and y'all still living with your parents in the same house?

I am trying to make sense of all of that.

5thElement:


So how old exactly is your brother who has an iPhone, brings girls into the house to bang and y'all still living with your parents in the same house?

I am trying to make sense of all of that.

men bring girls to the house even married men play games that is not my concern... I'm particular about he's battery life style not he's iphone (the fine face and iphone there was used to express a reason) and No we don't stay with our parent �

I believe you, brother and girlfriend are young. Experience is the best teacher. Once you guys have age on your side, make all the mistakes and hopefully learn from them.

iphi:
men bring girls to the house even married men play games that is not my concern... I'm particular about he's battery life style not he's iphone (the fine face and iphone there was used to express a reason) and No we don't stay with our parent �

Maybe if the battery lifestyle lands him 30 years behind bar, he may just learn his lessons.

Talk to your parents they have failed woefully

Under your parent's roof, he brings girls to sleep with? your parents are to blame

Chubhie:
I believe you, brother and girlfriend are young. Experience is the best teacher. Once you guys have age on your side, make all the mistakes and hopefully learn from them.

what's your definition of young... I'm sure you did not read what I wrote...

Mizwisdom:
Talk to your parents they have failed woefully

you did not read what I wrote

Mizwisdom:
Under your parent's roof, he brings girls to sleep with? your parents are to blame

wow!!! Did I ever mentioned this here... Please read... Infact my parent doesn't even stay in Nigeria. I'm talking about battery here, not this you writing

Talk to your brother to behave like you and kill the anger issues that leads to battery, and look for a more responsible girl to date and marry!