omooba969:


... route.

Back to your comment - The decision to sign a prenuptial before marriage destroys the very fabric/foundation upon which the couple's love is built. Prenuptial, in some cases, erodes the trust between the couple & sets one on the edge.

As cool as pre-nups are, they can be damaging.

A financially-savvy person will always sign a prenup.
I don't have a problem with the love-struck men, what I hate is that
the defenders of love often become bitter misogynist or worst murderers
if things don't go their way.

They start calling all women names and poisoning young men's mind when they were bested by their ex.
This is why I am pro-prenup for all men.

BuddhaPalm:


I believe we don’t have prenup laws here.

We don't need a prenup law.
Since marriage is a legal contract, the parties may decide whatever terms they agree on.

lilmax:
you are equal to a man but you need protection.

Everyone actually needs protection.

abbey621:
The mistake the man made was also punishing the children. A smart man thinks ahead, you would have noticed problems with your spouse a long time before the divorce. Just relocate to a rented flat, sell the properties and then get a divorce. No judge in the world can question you. The troubling piece here is that the man does not give a bleep about the children.....this is sad!

The money you get from the proceeds of the house sale will be shared. You can't beat the system easily

apelike1:
naija women nyash is like freezer that anybody can just go and open


Pera venture I married those apes (naija women which I won't spread my seed with) and she cheat me. will she still have the house (my own house I worked for)?

Mr apelike1

Cantonese:


I think this will help out some troubled marriages. It will stop the women from moving out and also stop men from throwing out their wives. Sincerely many homes are facing crisis with baby husbands and baby wives.

Thank God for this judge who dug out this law. I think it will instill some fear in many couples.

We have children from broken homes suffering different forms of abuses. The man our of anger did nor care about his own children. He wanted them thrown out with their mom.

Now for the women the judgement is clear. Allowances are for children and not for the divorced women. That should make women think properly before contemplating divorce.

It won't solve any marriage issues rather, it will lead to fewer marriages and more baby mamas

mmadu5:
single life is bae

I tell you

Tedpgrass:


Definitely a boomerang effect will or has started to ensue..


The growing numbers of baby mamas is a testament..
No young man with a sizeable bank balance wants to marry..
The chicks that abound are either destiny-destroying karashikas or prototypes in the making, thanks to changing value systems of society and friends..

.

Laws adapt to address contemporary problems.

Any state with a future will pass laws that give the best chance to its young.

Soon, we’ll have court mandated child support, despite your marital status.

pansophist:
Just like western men have stopped marrying their women due to law like this, i foresee the increase of unmarried ladies and men refusing to marry as the laws like these become common place. You can tell women they are equal to men and create laws the is unfair. Be careful what you wish for.

Isaiah 4:1 prophecy is coming to fruition gradually

The man can appeal the case. I think the law is for the defence of the children. Women now buys property and register with their brother or sister name. Using their family name to build so that the man will not be aware. While they stay to struggle for the man property. A real man know what to do. Court is the final destination for such issues. If u don't contribute for my growth and u show no concern when l am struggling to build u cannot enjoy the proceed. Hell will let loose, court or no court.a

good ruling. in civilized society, laws protect women and children.we need to protect our women and children

That’s your interpretation of my post. I never said any was greater than the other.

Also no one can work full time and do mothering full time. There has to be daycare, nanny or daddycare involved.

Someone has to be with the kids when the mom is working. Versus a full time mom who always has to be with the kids (in most cases).

Don’t bring the competition into it

Tedpgrass:


With due respect...
I applaud full-time mothers...

But please do not equate the stress full-time mothers go through to that of mothers who juggle both full-time work and mothering....

Your statement above just did that...

Please each stays on her own lane Strictly!!!

.

BuddhaPalm:


Laws adapt to address contemporary problems.

Any state with a future will pass laws that give the best chance to its young.

Soon, we’ll have court mandated child support, despite your marital status.

I will welcome that as the children who often have no say, are used as pawns in the game...

Certain the laws when operational, will be challenged as well.. To reduce misuse as seen in some publicised cases.

.

Daboomb:

Before you and some perpetual divorcees start jumping up like you've just won the lottery, here are a few things you should consider:

1) Thus is a STATE LAW, Federal laws trump state laws.
2) Thus law is applicable only in OYO state, except you move to OYO state, the other party will challenge it's "jurisdiction".
3) This 1800 law is superceeded by the most current law, the 1999 Constitution, as amended. It will not stand on Appeal to the Supreme Court.
4) The judgement, if you take note of the Judge's words, is speculative, non binding and not routed in law. It is like her own OPINION on how things should be.
5) Most importantly, Nigerian men by now, should be seeing g the handwriting on the wall and know the direction women want to stir marriage!
Signs PRENUP before marriage or a POSTNUP agreement after marriage, to clearly define how property is to be shared when marriage fails, as it is very likely to fail. That agreement will invalidate any funny law as it is signed between two consenting adults.

End of story.

You are shouting prenup, postnup up and down. Such agreements can always be invalidated and thrown out by the court esp if it's one sided or can be proven to be done under duress. It happens a lot. If you must sign a prenup let it be fair to both parties. You can't sign a prenup that says at event of divorce, the woman goes empty handed even after having kids and expect the court to Honour it except maybe the grounds for divorce is proven to be infidelity, the odds may be favourable . As for postnup nobody ll even look at it.

You have not a single clue how divorce works.

Not one clue

eddiebruk:


If she’s caught committing adultery, they will be divorced with the man taking custody of the kids and she loosing everything.

Xisnin:

We don't need a prenup law.
Since marriage is a legal contract, the parties may decide whatever terms they agree on.

Contracts are not made in a vacuum. There has to enabling legislation.

For example, we can’t sign a (legal) contract for me to kill you and harvest your parts.

Perhaps, it obtains in some alternate universe, but here it would be illegal.

Xisnin:


A financially-savvy person will always sign a prenup.
I don't have a problem with the love-struck men, what I hate is that
the defenders of love often become bitter misogynist or worst murderers
if things don't go their way.

They start calling all women names and poisoning young men's mind when they were bested by their ex.
This is why I am pro-prenup for all men.

I appreciate your position as per pre-nup but you're yet to address the adverse effects of pre-nups coz we must remember that we're not robots but humans with feelings.

dominique:
I like this rule. Our men have been conning their wives into contributing to develop property acquired in their name only to kick her out when things get sour. It doesn't matter whose name the propety is in, as long as it was acquired while in the marriage, both parties have rights to it.

that's a very stuuupid law and the American society is regretting it badly particularly the men, go to Quora and see for yourself how the men complain all the time questions related to these are asked. This will only end up destroying our society if the law is not critically looked into.

Many women don't contribute shît to things like these, why then should they benefit when things go bad.
Of course there are very few who do but the majority do not.

Shibaraba:
Kolewerk
For naija?
Oga na portmanteau wey you carry come you go carry go
You no carry come,you no carry go o....


Not supporting divorce though

Let me let y'all in a secret
Kids from divorced homes never keep theirs
They always end up divorced also

It might take some time but it eventually happens.
Wanna argue? Argue with your keyboard

Hello
New slangs for yor...... Guys

cococandy:
That’s your interpretation of my post. I never said any was greater than the other.

Also no one can work full time and do mothering full time. There has to be daycare, nanny or daddycare involved.

Someone has to be with the kids when the mom is working. Versus a full time mom who always has to be with the kids (in most cases).

Don’t bring the competition into it

I clarified the competition you subconsciously raised in your statement...

If you are of the opinion that a full-time mother works as hard or even harder than a father who works full-time and manages to spend some quality time with his children... Then it's acceptable to think you will think the same of a full-time working mother juggling motherhood alongside..

Your argument smacks of the "2-bit theory".. A bit of both to garner points but not a true realistic analysis!!


.

etimism1981:
The man can appeal the case. I think the law is for the defence of the children. Women now buys property and register with their brother or sister name. Using their family name to build so that the man will not be aware. While they stay to struggle for the man property. A real man know what to do. Court is the final destination for such issues. If u don't contribute for my growth and u show no concern when l am struggling to build u cannot enjoy the proceed. Hell will let loose, court or no court.a

Why do u think a lot of billionaires and millionaires own charities and cooperations and will most of their properties to them. It serves as a means of shielding properties from divorce cases. If you must buy a house for yourself use a cooperation. The house is seen as a property of the company and not your personal property. However she can come for half of your stake in the company which you can also secure by using ur children as owners. With a clause that you ll oversee till they turn 18 or 35...depending on how you want it.

omooba969:


I appreciate your position as per pre-nup but you're yet to address the adverse effects of pre-nups coz we must remember that we're not robots but humans with feelings.

Please educate about adverse effects of pre-nup sir...


It is someone who has an agenda that will be scared of a pre-nup... Male or female

Often clear ideas as to division of assets are stipulated in a well-written pre-nup!!

The disadvantage is the taxman knows your worth and will know to come calling soon.. But there are tax-efficient ways to get that loose end sorted.


Lastly if a pre-nup means lack of trust... I argue it goes both ways..
I don't trust that you're not after my wealth
You don't trust that I'll be of noble character to support you and the children in the event of a break.

.

BuddhaPalm:



Even if she doesn’t contribute in cash, there are other domestic duties she takes care of that frees up the man to fully pursue his goals.

The problem with these type of rulings is that it rewards bad behavior from wives.

Does your house help deserve your house for doing domestic duties. Men do domestic duties too and nobody rewards them for that.

And to be fair men reward their wives richly for whatever efforts she's making at home. They buy their wives cars, expensive clothes, jewelries, shoes, bags, expensive phones and expensive vacations. They pay her hospital bills and every bill accruing to her.

So to demand she gets the house he built alone just because of house chores she does is ridiculous.

TheKingIsHere:


The money you get from the proceeds of the house sale will be shared. You can't beat the system easily

It won't as long as the sale was well before the divorce. All he has to say is that it was spent on taking care of the family.

GraGra247:


Does your house help deserve your house for doing domestic duties. Men do domestic duties too and nobody rewards them for that.

And to be fair men reward their wives richly for whatever efforts she's making at home. They buy their wives cars, expensive clothes, jewelries, shoes, bags, expensive phones and expensive vacations. They pay her hospital bills and every bill accruing to her.

So to demand she gets the house he built alone just because of house chores she does is ridiculous.

such laws are created to provide a stable upbringing for THE CHILDREN. Not the woman, however since its assumed that the woman is the primary caregiver to the children, she's also included. She falls out of such category if she decides to remarry but the house now goes to the children and they can decide she continues to live there with her new husband... ....

TheKingIsHere:


Isaiah 4:1 prophecy is coming to fruition gradually

Its already a fruition in places like Japan, and the west, especially USA and UK and Sweden.

Again, I never said anything about a dad who manages to spend quality time with his children. You’re chasing your own tail.

Read the story in the OP. Take my initial post that you quoted and apply it to the OP and that’s all I’m talking about.

If you’re interested in going into different angles of which might be greater or possibly works harder in different situations, create another thread for that.

Your responses are fueled by assumptions that you’re making but not really voicing. Assumptions that are wrong because you don’t even know the true stand of the person you’re quoting when it comes to working moms who also have to be primary care givers. Put your assumptions away. Stop chasing your tail and just apply my initial post to the story in the OP specifically and not as a general rule that applies to all families

Tedpgrass:


I clarified the competition you subconsciously raised in your statement...

If you are of the opinion that a full-time mother works as hard or even harder than a father who works full-time and manages to spend some quality time with his children... Then it's acceptable to think you will think the same of a full-time working mother juggling motherhood alongside..

Your argument smacks of the "2-bit theory".. A bit of both to garner points but not a true realistic analysis!!


.

The fact that nairaland men are so against these laws which are basically child support laws made to take care of the kids not the wife just shows that they are terrible human beings
Being angry because the judge has to force them to take care of their kids and pass rulings to make sure that they cannot maltreat their children because of any useless feelings they have about their ex-wife is just pathetic and shows they are not worthy of procreating with

Tedpgrass:


Definitely a boomerang effect will or has started to ensue..


The growing numbers of baby mamas is a testament..
No young man with a sizeable bank balance wants to marry..
The chicks that abound are either destiny-destroying karashikas or prototypes in the making, thanks to changing value systems of society and friends..

.

I feel sorry for women, na them go suffer am pass. Laws like this has a backfire effect. It seems progressive, but in reality, its deterrent in nature. It will make marriage completely unattractive to men. Western societies are in an irreversible decline of replacement birth rates. Thanks to law like these, Nigeria is preparing to board the ship.

And laws like these can only be enforced in civilised society. A typical naija man will rather kill the woman than watch her live in the house he built.

Tedpgrass:


Please educate about adverse effects of pre-nup sir...


It is someone who has an agenda that will be scared of a pre-nup... Male or female

Often clear ideas as to division of assets are stipulated in a well-written pre-nup!!

The disadvantage is the taxman knows your worth and will know to come calling soon.. But there are tax-efficient ways to get that loose end sorted.


Lastly if a pre-nup means lack of trust... I argue it goes both ways..
I don't trust that you're not after my wealth
You don't trust that I'll be of noble character to support you and the children in the event of a break.

.

Therefore, the essence of marriage is absent unless you choose to be in denial.

omooba969:


Therefore, the essence of marriage is absent unless you choose to be in denial.

Not at all..
You simply go in without any rose-coloured spectacles..

Its well planned out and thought-through, open to errors, after all we are human....
But overall to minimise the possibility of shipwrecks


I must say its not fail-proof but close....


.

GraGra247:


Does your house help deserve your house for doing domestic duties. Men do domestic duties too and nobody rewards them for that.

And to be fair men reward their wives richly for whatever efforts she's making at home. They buy their wives cars, expensive clothes, jewelries, shoes, bags, expensive phones and expensive vacations. They pay her hospital bills and every bill accruing to her.

So to demand she gets the house he built alone just because of house chores she does is ridiculous.

It’s not even primarily for domestic chores, but for Opportunity Cost.

When people get married, there’s the unspoken expectation that the woman dampen her ambition and look more towards the home front.

Yes, it will be abused, as it currently is in the West. But you know how the law leans more towards acquitting a guilty man than convict an innocent person...

That’s the same thing here.

If not, the only thing women can do is cross their fingers and hope they are marrying a benevolent dictator who will not throw them out on a whim.

The law is just trying to give the same kind of protection it offers employees.