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Why Cant He Leave Me Alone: - Romance - Nairaland

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Pls Help!! He Said He Is Going To Leave Me If I Still Refuse Him Sex / His Girlfriend Is Asthmatic And Its Hereditary ,Should He Leave Her?? / . (2) (3) (4)

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Why Cant He Leave Me Alone: by xxcarolxx(f): 1:33am On Sep 15, 2010
I kicked my ex into touch because of his cheating ways, But he still is disturbing my life. I have moved on from him but he is trying to cause trouble in my new relationship. I have blocked his no on my phone, iv tried to cancel a bill he pays here but i cant as its in his name. He refuses to transfer it back to my name, I don't want him paying this bill i would rather pay for it myself. I just don't know what to do at this stage, its like talking to a brick wall, How do i get through to him that its over, I have ignored him but he still disturbs me,
Re: Why Cant He Leave Me Alone: by HighChief4(m): 1:43am On Sep 15, 2010
You can't just keep ignoring him, especially when it's not working and falling on deaf ears. I advise you try talk things over with him, listen to what he has to say and also let him know why you can't take him back again.
Re: Why Cant He Leave Me Alone: by madlady(f): 1:45am On Sep 15, 2010
xxcarolxx:

I kicked my ex into touch because of his cheating ways, But he still is disturbing my life. I have moved on from him but he is trying to cause trouble in my new relationship. I have blocked his no on my phone, iv tried to cancel a bill he pays here but i cant as its in his name. He refuses to transfer it back to my name, I don't want him paying this bill i would rather pay for it myself. I just don't know what to do at this stage, its like talking to a brick wall, How do i get through to him that its over, I have ignored him but he still disturbs me,

I know how you feel, my hope is he will just get fed-up and move on.

I am not really sure what you can do, I think it's just a matter of sitting it out.

@Poster as long as he's not verbally or physically abusive you may have to play the long game, I think he will eventually give up and move on.
Re: Why Cant He Leave Me Alone: by xxcarolxx(f): 1:48am On Sep 15, 2010
Highchief, i have spoke with him about why i cant take him back, but as i say its like talking to a brick wall, Madlady This stage its driving me around the twist, Hopefully soon he will get the message,
Re: Why Cant He Leave Me Alone: by Nobody: 1:50am On Sep 15, 2010
When she gets tired she would definitely give up.So 4 d main time just bear it & introduce ignorin tactics.
Re: Why Cant He Leave Me Alone: by madlady(f): 1:54am On Sep 15, 2010
xxcarolxx:

Highchief, i have spoke with him about why i cant take him back, but as i say its like talking to a brick wall, Madlady This stage its driving me around the twist, Hopefully soon he will get the message,

I know, it feels very bad but, if he's not calling your family and Friends or threatening violence maybe you can bear it.

TRY to avoid meeting him, ( I did that, it just made it worse) email him, maybe you can try to reason with him undecided.
Re: Why Cant He Leave Me Alone: by xxcarolxx(f): 1:55am On Sep 15, 2010
yorke:

When she gets tired she would definitely give up.So 4 d main time just bear it & introduce ignorin tactics.
This has been going on over 2 months and he still hasn't got the message that im gone from his life, He still gets his post sent to my address, which now i just shred and have told him this but it makes no difference to him,
Re: Why Cant He Leave Me Alone: by xxcarolxx(f): 1:59am On Sep 15, 2010
madlady, I have tried everything i have emailed but makes no difference whats so ever to him. My bf even called him to ask him to leave me in peace but still makes no difference, No matter what i try i cant get it through to him that he is past tense,
Re: Why Cant He Leave Me Alone: by HighChief4(m): 2:02am On Sep 15, 2010
xxcarolxx:

Highchief, i have spoke with him about why i cant take him back, but as i say its like talking to a brick wall, Madlady This stage its driving me around the twist, Hopefully soon he will get the message,
Be taking his calls(except your new found love is against it), hold no grudge so he won't presume you are still hurt and prolly thats why you are keeping him at bay, always let him know you have come over it, pls don't sound harsh to him cos he might think your decision is borne from your emotions, but always let him know that you are not hurt anymore but can't just come back to him.
Re: Why Cant He Leave Me Alone: by Nobody: 2:04am On Sep 15, 2010
Oh sorry,i thot is she.I wonder y some matured guyz stil behave lik a kid. Report he 2 d police if u are fed up. Thats d best i gat 4 u.
Re: Why Cant He Leave Me Alone: by HighChief4(m): 2:06am On Sep 15, 2010
xxcarolxx:

madlady, I have tried everything i have emailed but makes no difference whats so ever to him. My bf even called him to ask him to leave me in peace but still makes no difference, No matter what i try i cant get it through to him that he is past tense,
Don't get your new bf speak with him directly, he can only give you suggestions on what to do, cos instead of solvin a problem that might just create more problems
Re: Why Cant He Leave Me Alone: by madlady(f): 2:06am On Sep 15, 2010
@xxcarolxx, you said it's been 2 months,  cry sadly it's still in the early days.


You have one thing in your favour, he KNOWS you have some one else.


I think he will eventually give up.


IF you really want to get heavy undecided, get a lawyer to send him a letter but this could have an adverse effect.
Re: Why Cant He Leave Me Alone: by xxcarolxx(f): 2:11am On Sep 15, 2010
Highchief, my bf has no problems with me if i took his call, as i show him the texts my ex sends to me. But i feel if i keep taking his calls im giving him hope, I have told him in a nice way and a bitchy way that im gone from him and there is no way back, Yorke the police wont interfere as he has broken no laws, and its not a route i would like to do down. Madlady i think i may have to go that route. But his response is ye cant shake an oak tree,
Re: Why Cant He Leave Me Alone: by Nobody: 2:14am On Sep 15, 2010
@op Do u stay in 9ja?
Re: Why Cant He Leave Me Alone: by HighChief4(m): 2:15am On Sep 15, 2010
How long did you guys date? Did he accept his cheatin acts or you caught him in the act?
Re: Why Cant He Leave Me Alone: by xxcarolxx(f): 2:16am On Sep 15, 2010
yorke:

@op Do u stay in 9ja?
Noi live in ireland, Im irish,
Re: Why Cant He Leave Me Alone: by chika98: 2:17am On Sep 15, 2010
Move to a different city or just IGNORE him
No one stays interested for too long a time
Re: Why Cant He Leave Me Alone: by madlady(f): 2:18am On Sep 15, 2010
chika98:

Move to a different city or just IGNORE him
No one stays interested for too long a time

Depends on what you call a long time undecided
Re: Why Cant He Leave Me Alone: by Nobody: 2:20am On Sep 15, 2010
Oh i see. He will surely get tired 1day.I tink so.
Re: Why Cant He Leave Me Alone: by xxcarolxx(f): 2:22am On Sep 15, 2010
High_Chief:

How long did you guys date? Did he accept his cheatin acts or you caught him in the act?
We dated for 6 years. No he never accepted his cheating ways, He always denied them. No i never actually caught him in the act, but i got phone calls from girls asking who i was, and sometimes he never came home at night, and i also over heard some of his phone calls, The evidence was all there. I had received a phone call from 1 girl when he arrived home i asked him for his phone he said his battery was dead so i asked him to charge it but he wouldn't. So i called the girl back and put it on loud speaker for him to hear he just went silent and moody.
Re: Why Cant He Leave Me Alone: by chika98: 2:23am On Sep 15, 2010
madlady:

Depends on what you call a long time undecided

hey Lady. . Long time
I've got some things to show ya wink

Ermm a long time could be months or years. How ever long it takes
Re: Why Cant He Leave Me Alone: by madlady(f): 2:30am On Sep 15, 2010
chika98:

hey Lady. . Long time
I've got some things to show ya wink

Ermm a long time could be months or years. How ever long it takes
Hi hun, pls show me, I will go to your thread.  smiley smiley


@TOPIC, well it can take years, my ex still hmmm plays this game, it's been almost 2 years.

You do get use to it in the end, but I may have taken more drastic steps if he were abusive in any way.
Re: Why Cant He Leave Me Alone: by xxcarolxx(f): 2:37am On Sep 15, 2010
Madlady, are you serious omg how do you put up with it?? The only thing is he cant enter my house as i can have him arrested for that. Otherwise he would prolly be sitting on my door step,
Re: Why Cant He Leave Me Alone: by madlady(f): 2:49am On Sep 15, 2010
I am use to it now.

It use to make me hopping mad but that passed.

He's a very good person in most ways so I see with him.



IF you take too much notice of him it MAY make it worse.

@xxcarolxxx does he threaten you in anyway?
Re: Why Cant He Leave Me Alone: by xxcarolxx(f): 3:00am On Sep 15, 2010
madlady:

I am use to it now.

It use to make me hopping mad but that passed.

He's a very good person in most ways so I see with him.



IF you take too much notice of him it MAY make it worse.

@xxcarolxxx does he threaten you in anyway?

[/quote No he has never threatened me. In some ways he wasn't bad just his habit of cheating i couldn't put up with and he let me down big time on the saddest time of my life for which i will never forgive him.
Re: Why Cant He Leave Me Alone: by madlady(f): 3:11am On Sep 15, 2010
^^Well if he's not abusive to you then maybe you can give it more time, he may stop.


@xxcarolxx pls forgive me asking you this, do you still care for him?

Anyway I will let some other person give you REAL advice
Re: Why Cant He Leave Me Alone: by xxcarolxx(f): 3:17am On Sep 15, 2010
madlady, I do care about him but just as a friend only but have not told him as he will take it the wrong way, Hope in time he will get fed up, But thanks to all for the advice. I need to go get some sleep as back up at 6 in the morning,
Re: Why Cant He Leave Me Alone: by HighChief4(m): 3:21am On Sep 15, 2010
xxcarolxx:

We dated for 6 years. No he never accepted his cheating ways, He always denied them. No i never actually caught him in the act, but i got phone calls from girls asking who i was, and sometimes he never came home at night, and i also over heard some of his phone calls, The evidence was all there. I had received a phone call from 1 girl when he arrived home i asked him for his phone he said his battery was dead so i asked him to charge it but he wouldn't. So i called the girl back and put it on loud speaker for him to hear he just went silent and moody.
If you guys dated this long, you don't have to blame him for his persistent stalking you, am sure he must have thought about those years and the complications of building a new relationship, sometimes you don't know what you have till you loose it. Am only concerned now on your swiftness on getting a new bf, if you just came out of a 6years old relationship I think you should need sometime to yourself first before gettin into a new relationship plus 2months is too brief to start another one, except you are just using this new guy to get over your ex. Whateva is the case, if you have truly moved on, you can still be nice to your ex and help him move on as well, at least for old times sake. Next time don't always listen to people when you are in a relationship cos they are out to destroy it, i don't see why a stranger gal should be updating you on your bf escapedes if the intention is not aimed at destroying it, so the moment you start listenin to such people just know that your relationship is heading to the rocks.
Re: Why Cant He Leave Me Alone: by CyberG: 4:08am On Sep 15, 2010
^^^ I had to comment for High Chief spoke like an oracle! How can you come out of a 6 year relationship and still jumped into a new one within 2 months? You were not really in that relationship or you were using him or you are just really too young and immature! Otherwise, what were you waiting for in the 1st, 2nd, 3rd. . .years and not quit then 6th, GBAM! Well, this new guy you have is your rebound and you guys will bang each other silly then you will want someone else! This will be even more true if the ex disvirgined you or got you when you were much younger.

But look, I don't care about the details 'cos while you were chopping him for 6 years, you didn't complain (plus him paying a bill when you couldn't afford it or pay it yourself) but now, you are coming to tell a one-sided BS of a story? I hope people can use their brains to think before giving you any serious advise because you literally ate him all these years and now wanna run? You're lucky you now live in America or whatever goddamn place you live, cos if it were Naija or some backwater country, you go don hear am now!
Re: Why Cant He Leave Me Alone: by Jaideyone(m): 4:59am On Sep 15, 2010
^^^wtf is this guy talking about? So u expect her to continue with the relationship and marry him even though he's a cheat? No way. And mind u the fact that he was paying her bills doesn't mean she can't leave the realtionship anytime she wants angry
Re: Why Cant He Leave Me Alone: by adconline(m): 5:42am On Sep 15, 2010
this new relationship you are in, dont entangle your finances with ur new BF. Not all relationships lead to marriage. So keep your finances and pay ur bills and dont mke urself vulnerable to severe any relationship that is heading south,
Re: Why Cant He Leave Me Alone: by madlady(f): 6:43am On Sep 15, 2010
adconline:

this new relationship you are in, don't entangle your finances with your new BF. Not all relationships lead to marriage. So keep your finances and pay your bills and don't mke urself vulnerable to severe any relationship that is heading south,

Very good advice.

Some times it's almost impossible not to entangle your finaces when your a couple, even doing a petty business may mean you need to do this, that works both ways, male to female and female to male. I do agree with you, I don't think I would do that again.

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