Dear Diary,

Things didn’t go as planned today. I realized, in life, we find happiness in the strangest places. Every little detail matters. The words we say go farther than our actions. Actions might be forgiven, but words won’t be forgotten. An incident gave me a glimpse into the naked existence of life;

There was an aged woman pulling along a huge luggage and no one stopped to help. She had blisters on her feet, apparently from walking too much. Her face was worn. The face of one who had been through all and more. What I felt at that moment was beyond sympathy. It was empathy. It struck me that we must all strive to live and die in a blaze of glory.

What did she do? Why was she left alone to drag on her things with frail hands and feeble knees? I got off the bus and walked up to her, handing her a five hundred naira note. She said prayers for me with smiles on her face….

Wale called today.

I told him never to call me again. My friends were still pissed at the stunt he pulled. I’d cool off tonight. Mary had offered I went to Lekki with her. Guess you need a boy to get over another boy right? LOL. So a new cutie and a couple of drinks won’t be a bad idea. Cheers to a good life!

There was commotion outside. I sighed. Unilag girls won’t let me rest today. It was a sunny afternoon. The sun burned angrily. I felt sorry for the students taking noon classes. Lex was sleeping peacefully, Ruthie too.

The commotion continued. I could hear screams and lots of “leave her alone” and several “you girls should stop fighting”. There was an unsolicited opinion from another voice “why you sef go do dah kain thing”. I was caught between doing amebo and minding my business.

I opened the door instead. Amebo is allowed. ”Cloth wey your papa no fit buy!” Lara was yelling. “Ha! Tobechi you no go see heaven o! You know how many waka I waka before I see this cloth buy? Ehn?!” That was a rhetoric anyway. I was certain no one was expecting Tobechi to answer the questions thrown at her. But it was cool to know she found her Fendi thief.

A lot of scratching and hair pulling was going on. Some girls made attempts to separate them. ‘I can’t be bothered‘ I told myself. ‘Let them keep on’.

It is fun most times when the girls fight. You’d end up hearing the gossip on half the girls in the hostel. They would end up exposing whose Brazilian hair was fake, who was sleeping around or hanging with someone else’s boyfriend. Who stole dollars or gadgets from her sugar daddy, who is or was a love-vendor and who was squatting who?

Tobechi threw the first punch. Lara hit her back. They both fell and wrapped their legs around each other like one was preventing the other from escaping. ‘Childish drama’ I thought. Make una fight if una wan fight. Lara had a height advantage over Tobechi. She had a model-like but masculine figure. Tobechi on the other hand was petite, but really feisty. Her roommates dreaded her. She was known to be an unrepentant petty thief.

Guess karma caught up with her; she stole the wrong girl’s cloth.

More slapping. Scratching. Biting. Cloth ripping…. I was getting bored already and turned to leave for my room.

”Becca nawa for you o” Shade stopped me halfway through the door. “Excuse me?” I asked, Irritated. I didn’t like her. She was a renown gossip in the hostel. I tagged her ‘A walking nightmare’. “Any problem?” I asked again rudely. Hoping she would drop dead for even speaking to me.

”You for no tell Lara say na Tobe carry the cloth na“ She said, scratching her hair. Say what Was she out of her mind? I needed to understand before I did the unbelievable. “Hope you are not mad?” I was getting angry but I tried to curtail my anger.

“Shey you no know say na you cause fight? No be you go tell Lara say na Tobe carry her cloth for line?” She feigned an angry look too. I couldn’t understand what her point was. I barely had a conversation with Lara.

Plus, how jobless could I have been. Lara wasn’t my friend, I had no reason to be concerned if she found her sweatshirt or not. Abi this girl is just looking for who will break her neck this afternoon. So the entire hostel would be thinking I snitched? Was that what was going through their minds when I stepped out to the corridor? Sweet Jesus!

Somebody go break neck today. I needed to clear the air. “Shade commot from my front first” I yelled, shoving her away from the door. “Na now una go see my madness” I added. “Lara! Bia! Shift here biko!” I called out angrily. Lara let go of Tobechi. They were still fighting. “Abeg which time I tell you say na Tobe carry your cloth?” I asked. Since the gossip was passed round, I was grateful most of the girls were on the corridor. They needed to know that I had nothing to do with whatever chicken fight was going on.

She moves closer to explain. I stepped back. “Aunty no move near me. Talk make everybody dey hear you” I was enraged. I hated petty gossips born out of sheer boredom. “I no talk say you call Tobe name for the matter. I tell them say na you holla me say make I ask my roommates“ she stuttered. The girls began to murmur. Everyone mouthing diverse opinions. “So how did my name come up o! Because this hostel won’t know peace today” Tobe fired at Lara.

“Well Shade said she saw you at Ozone and you had a Fendi sweatshirt on” Lara explained in defense. At that point it dawned on me that Shade wanted to die. She only needed someone to do it for her.

Tobechi pushed through the crowd and grabbed Shade by the hair. “You know say you don dey do am since and me sef don dey find you Shade” Her bestie also joined in the mini battle. More biting, scratching, slapping, cloth ripping. I walked back to my room.

“Jesus Christ!” Someone screamed. I turned back. Can this day be any worse? I was shocked too. Lara’s cousin who had visited her the previous weekend strolled in smiling. She had the sweatshirt on. Not knowing the disaster she had caused by taking the shirt without permission. I walked into my room. Lex and Ruthie were still very much asleep. I opened my diary and continue.

Dear diary,

Unilag girls are crazy.