sliqboy:

He is telling you a matured truth. Don't be judgemental.

Learn to read before commenting, Son. Hr wasn't referring to me, I just replied him cos I love the way he detailed his ordeals.

rafhell:
Something tells me the OP is a big liar.
Let us read between the lines. You put out your post 11 days ago asking for advice. In eleven days, all these drama had played out.
You even got a 2 bedroom accommodation close to your work place and you already moved in with the kids.
Madam or whoever you are, not everybody on nairaland is daft.

Nice storyline BTW

see what happens when one doesn't check the date.... Me too have forgotten to check the date to reason. Nice deduction.

MiddleSpot:


This lady needs consolation.

Consolation, my ass! We warned her to stay off new man at the time, but she told us her bit on the side touched her g-spots, she like him and wanted more. She's now free to give her center of gravity to him permanently, but I doubt he'd be wanting any with her 2 and 4 year old baggage in tow!

Marbella003:


I called my colleague and told him everything. He said that I shouldn't hold him responsible for anything since our rendezvous was based on mutual consent. He said he doesn't want to have anything to with me and we should keep our relationship at work very platonic so as not to raise eyebrows of those who might link him to what happened with me.

Didn't we warn you he'd do this?!

sisisioge:


Baby...bet we are in love nau

will you give me transport money if we date

sisisioge:
Chai! You confessed! Lordylordy!

I always knew you weren't much of a bright woman, didn't know it was this bad. Well, take heart. Remember he wasn't so appealing to you before now. Simply gather yourself together and forge ahead.

You will be fine last last.

So you would have advised her not to confess I guess it's what you're good at doing

Chamber2000:
will you give me transport money if we date

If you promise not to call the neighbours

If both stories are true then your husband has really done you a favour by seeking for divorce ;your heart has never been with him. Find the kind of man you love and marry after this episode.

Analysiscorner:
If both stories are true then your husband has really done you a favour by seeking for divorce ;your heart has never been with him. Find the kind of man you love and marry after this episode.

Two kids, 2 and 4 years old, then her heart was not with the father? I'd kick her out too to be honest. Her heart was probably always elsewhere and those kids ain't his!

virago:



So you would have advised her not to confess I guess it's what you're good at doing

A lot of us told her not to confess and dump loverboy, we'd put it down as a mistake that would never happen again. Now she confessed and those poor kids get to suffer!

But then, she did say she liked loverboy and wanted more of him. Except now, no hubby, no loverboy, and two poor kids with their whole life shattered!

Marbella003:
I took some of the advice from my previous thread and told my husband what happened. Here is the thread:

https://www.nairaland.com/5162191/cheated-husband-guy-work-dont

I was genuine shedding tears as I relayed my shameful experience to him. I apologized and begged for him to forgive me and I promised to never repeat such again. I thought he'd understand and forgive me. But I was wrong. My husband now wants a divorce. Actually, he has sent me and the kids out of his house. I have a daughter who is 4 and a son who is 2. My husband said he doesn't think he is the father. I assured him that he is and that he should get a DNA test to confirm. But he refused.

I rented a 2 bedroom flat somewhere close to my office. This is where I currently stay. Since leaving my husband's house I have only received a phone call from him where he stated the date that he and I were going to visit my parents who are currently in my village. He told me that if I wasn't going to come, he'd go alone and tell them what happened and why he decided to divorce me.

I feel like my life is over. I can't face my parents and tell them what I've done. It's very shameful. I can't even face my friends and relations. I feel like I'm drowning a pool of shame and despair. I can't imagine being a single mother at this age. I love my husband and I enjoyed our marriage. I can't imagine it all being over.

I called my colleague and told him everything. He said that I shouldn't hold him responsible for anything since our rendezvous was based on mutual consent. He said he doesn't want to have anything to with me and we should keep our relationship at work very platonic so as not to raise eyebrows of those who might link him to what happened with me.

I'm utterly hopeless. I feel like taking my life. I almost took this action yesterday but I pitied my children. But with every passing day I feel like suicide is the only way to end my pain. I wish I had listened to those people who advised me to keep what I did a secret. I wanted to, but every time I was with my husband I felt I was constantly betraying him by hiding the truth from him. I just want to die. I can't bare this pain anymore.

The first thing is to forgive yourself and move on . Suicide should not cross your mind at all or who are you going to leave your kids with because with the look of things your husband will not want to have anything to do with them so please think about these innocent children and move on with your life the best you can do is what you have done which is confession. Life continue no matter what happens.

You are educated, Save and travel to Canada with your kids, so you can secure a better life for them and start over, time & distance heals all wounds...idk about your mistakes, but why would a man send his children out and refuse to do DNA test? Pls madam forget your shame & secure your kids future.

hmmm, it shall be well

pansophist:
From my experience, women handle cheating better than men, but that's if they are convinced that it's a one-off thing and their man still love them. For men, it's different because for a man to feel loved, he has to be respected and in charge/territorial. Men are protector, and cheating on him undermines his core value as a man, sending a message that the other guy's seed is more worthy than his. This is how men process cheating, unlike women who are more concern if she is still his beloved. Men cheat for validation, women cheat to validate him. See the difference? A woman who cheats on a man has one interpretation, that her partner lack in a way the guy she cheated with doesn't. Women are the gatekeeper of sex, and will only give it to the best man in the pack.

You should have repented and taken the news to your grave. Masculinity is attached to the ego, and the thoughts of another man sleeping with his wife will completely shatter the fortress which his self-esteem and dominance as a conqueror man are built on. Logically he may forgive you, but he cant fight millions of years of evolutionary hardwiring which will play in his head anytime he sees you.

Furthermore, Your husband is a product of the global feminization of men. Men these days have to stop being masculine, to be muscular, virile, and have the strength, vigour and toughness of a Greek warrior. Testosterone is an all-time low, while obesity and Male weakness is an all-time high. In as much as I do not condone your cheating, men also need to know what it means to be a man. Providing only is just a slice of masculinity in the whole pie. I'm a muscular man with my abs clearly visible, and I see the way women, both married and young lust after me. Women are moved with looks just as men and a simple Tinder experiment with fake Male photo with muscular bodies sill simply prove it to you.

If you're a man reading this, please take your body serious. Just as you want your woman to look sexy, you have the obligations to look the same. Watch how an animal has sex, with a bit of aggression and energy, you must do it like that with her. No woman will cheat when her man supplies all her sexual needs and appear sexy to her.

To some extent i will disagree with you, why? A cheat is always a cheat, believe me.
In life, you can't have it all, that is the bitter truth and that is why i always take contentment over beauty or money any day in a relationship because a contented partner will hardly cheat in relationship.
They will always be contended with what they have or see and can make do with it and not looking for what they don't have.
This is were contentment comes into play -
If you are exercising regularly and not have much financially, there is an excuse to cheat.
If you are providing but don't have much time for your body, a cheat will have an excuse.
For a cheat, the excuses are endless - he is not caring, not good enough on bed, not providing enough financially, not handsome or se y enough, no car or secret lover as a better car, don't have her time because not always around, you see the list is endless.
I am always away 8-9 months in a year, even though i provide for my wife, she as all the excuse of sleeping around because am not always around etc
My own is that don't kill yourself for any nonentity because if you die because of them, before they bury you another person don dey naki her sef.
I think more men should be more selfish now than ever because i think men sacrifice alot just to please the average nigerian lady and that is very bad.

Arkmanbuddy:



Mehn, how many books have you written?! You should try being a novelist. Damn you're good!

Lol. I haven't written any.
I think I have to give that a thought.

Thanks bro.

First, Its a good decision you took to own up to your mistakes. Secondly, I do not respect women who open their thighs to men other than their husbands. Thirdly, I understand your husband's decision to ask for divorce because the Bible allows divorce on grounds of infidelity. Lastly, remember that whatever you do from now on, your children still need you

generationz:



Hmmm

Quite possible


Well most are terrible at it.

Imagine telling us she rented an apartment in eleven days and moved in.


How did you discover this?

I have other receipts for you. She has been lying about her day to DA living. Some people have actually claimed some of her Stories asking for financial help are actually her in disguise.

She writes those stories then collect money from people to give the monies to the victims. As she claims.

This story also includes how she lied about a house she never owns.

truthsayer009:


I have other receipts for you. She has been lying about her day to DA living. Some people have actually claimed some of her Stories asking for financial help are actually her in disguise.

She writes those stories then collect money from people to give the monies to the victims. As she claims.

This story also includes how she lied about a house she never owns.

Lol
A woman who refers to herself as the storyteller in her bio. what do you expect?

I hope most girls can see and use their brains. When a person tells you they made so so amount from blogging or another profession compare them to others in the proffesion . If the difference is too much they are either liars or money launderers.

Why u nor think first before u spread ur legs, first u nor tink about d shame u go carry give ur parents,brothers, sisters and relations.if ur kids friends hear dis story waiting u feel say dey go dey tell ur kids.

Sounds fake but, what do I know. Suicide may be a very good idea, your kids will be fine

The thing is...it's not marriage you want..so stay and enjoy being a single parent so you can have 100% sexual satisfaction...you can call me self...I will keep you company..I Will meet all your sexual needs

I hope the issue has laid to rest?

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erifeoluwasimi:
He is hurting and angry.give him time to heal.
Send important people he respects to plead on your behalf, like l pastors, friends etc

No sane man will take back a cheating wife.

pocohantas:
Bored alfa male...

........

Na wa. Sacrificed your kids future for a few minutes of pleasure. I pray your kids are spared from the effects of your action

All you need to do is to keep praying and be patient with your husband you don't expect him to embrace you just because you tell him the truth infidelity is a deal breaker for many people.so give him time and keep praying that God mend your marriage because you owe your children many explanation if you raised them alone.

But why are men so unforgiving when it comes to women extra martial affairs? I'm not justifying this woman's act. I know it's wrong. Absolutely wrong, but isn't this same act men do with pride? Yet, female forgive them.

Well, it's the lady I blame. She could have sought God's forgiveness and conceal it from her husband.

Stargurl20:
But why are men so unforgiving when it comes to women extra martial affairs? I'm not justifying this woman's act. I know it's wrong. Absolutely wrong, but isn't this same act men do with pride? Yet, female forgive them.

Well, it's the lady I blame. She could have sought God's forgiveness and conceal it from her husband.

You won't understand.