So i met this girl when she was in ss3 n i was about to start uni, we were both young but she was younger, we fell in love then but never had sex, after her secondary education she went to lag to stay with her uncle b4 she was offered admission into uni, when she was in lagos she told me she was not interested in relationship stuff anymore n i tried everything but shit didn’t work, her mind was made already.. i was still trying even in her uni days the day she asked me if i was that dull to see the zero possibility.. all through her uni days n even her nysc days in 2016/2017.. babe didn’t reason me in any way, after her nysc she had a job but the pay wasn’t reasonable..the thing is that in 2018 b4 she lost her job she started calling me on her to check up on me, i was even very surprised on the first day, didn’t know she still had ma number, now she wants back n she’s serious, though i still love her but when i ever I remember the words she used on me, different thoughts will fill ma mind, she has all the qualities i need in a woman but i’m just confused if on let her in ma life again cus sometimes i feel she back cus m doing well or something...

Let her go. She's a conditional lover,when she gets comfortable again another instability will come their love is tied to matetial things. You will find someone that loves you for you. This one still has growing up to do

essenceplus:
Let her go. She's a conditional lover,when she gets comfortable again another instability will come their love is tied to matetial things. You will find someone that loves you for you. This one still has growing up to do

o.p listen to this man, i REPEAT, LISTEN to this man..

base on experience (not really my experience though),she might want 2 ;
*use you as a stepping stone to her success,
*as a shoulder to lean on "for the now",
* or any other stuff as a medium or backup option to wait for her mr. right or for a perfect/stable condition

once the mission has bn executed and she's in a stable condition or situation, VOOOOOM! she go troway u again..

o.p i may be wrong though but am 100% sure there is a reason she want you back and she will move again

I believe there is right voice in you telling you the right thing to do. Why cant you just give yourself time and study the situation before taking a decision? Forget the past, play along with her, If she is still worth to be with, then you can renew your heart.

maybe she was too young or scared to go on with u in the first place, some girls due to home upbringing, avoids love affairs till they are matured enough. 4get the past,focus more on who she has become presently.

I'll say give it a try but dont put all in it. Just incase!

if you truly love her let her go... don't force it ,don't pressure her... she ll come

united442:


o.p listen to this man, i REPEAT, LISTEN to this man..

base on experience (not really my experience though),she might want 2 ;
*use you as a stepping stone to her success,
*as a shoulder to lean on "for the now",
* or any other stuff as a medium or backup option to wait for her mr. right or for a perfect/stable condition

once the mission has bn executed and she's in a stable condition or situation, VOOOOOM! she go troway u again..

o.p i may be wrong though but am 100% sure there is a reason she want you back and she will move again

You amaze me. Very funny the way you commented. Anyways we sabi them,whenbtheyve run out of options that's when they start pulling heartstrings they rejected,discarded and devalued. We also know its because of shiny things. All of a sudden love sprung up from her heart like that. Ladies and materialism.

The only thing I pity here is your heart, after 5years I assume of saying no to you, she finally decided to say yes and you are considering it. If am you, I will also tell her no for 5years as well.

After all, two can play that game.

Signed.

Vice President,

Bachelors Club,

Ikeja, Lagos Branch.

Easybela:
maybe she was too young or scared to go on with u in the first place, some girls due to home upbringing, avoids love affairs till they are matured enough. 4get the past,focus more on who she has become presently.

Na lie. Her firm rejection was of her personal resolve,deductions and myopic self centered reasons. Call a spade a spade. When them see say them miss better thing them gondey run come back. I have them around me in fact one's mum has been trying to be in my good books coming close to me anytime we meet in church cause she wants me to marry her daughter. Same person who chased me away cause I was on low key didn't dress nor show but after the incident I started wearing new clothes,changed how I interact with people talk tall.give gifts, show off small now all the chicks crave forbny attention in church including their mothers.its the same with the op ladies should learn to love without attachment. That's pure and genuine love not this shoprite love been paraded up and down

People learn day by day about life and how it works, what she knows through experience now and maturity makes her a total different person from who she was in the past and her beliefs
If I were you and I still love her like you claim you do I will give her the chance, get to know this new personality of her's and study the motives behind it and it's genuineness, and it's compatibility to mine

Wilson125:
So i met this girl when she was in ss3 n i was about to start uni, we were both young but she was younger, we fell in love then but never had sex, after her secondary education she went to lag to stay with her uncle b4 she was offered admission into uni, when she was in lagos she told me she was not interested in relationship stuff anymore n i tried everything but shit didn’t work, her mind was made already.. i was still trying even in her uni days the day she asked me if i was that dull to see the zero possibility.. all through her uni days n even her nysc days in 2016/2017.. babe didn’t reason me in any way, after her nysc she had a job but the pay wasn’t reasonable..the thing is that in 2018 b4 she lost her job she started calling me on her to check up on me, i was even very surprised on the first day, didn’t know she still had ma number, now she wants back n she’s serious, though i still love her but when i ever I remember the words she used on me, different thoughts will fill ma mind, she has all the qualities i need in a woman but i’m just confused if on let her in ma life again cus sometimes i feel she back cus m doing well or something...

Well OP, I'll give you an example of a friend. He loved this lady back then in Uni but she told him to his face she can't go out with student. Well the lady is still home unmarried today begging my friend because she knows he has everything she needs.

I am not much of a lover expert but any lady who can't love you when you are on your way to becoming something tangible isn't worth much of your time.
I mean you beg her back then while in Uni but she refused. I am sure she definitely would have gone out with some guys back then and things didn't work out.
Marriage isn't a trip but a journey together. So think well.

Let us assume she was too young to realize the importance of growing with your man when he got nothing back in the secondary school days, that can be forgiven. You went on believing in her at the University days hoping to make her see reasons why she should give you a chance still she wouldn't but instead try to ridicule you by calling you a dullard, now this is unforgivable. No one can decide for you but some of us here can boldly tell you she's not the type that is ready to bear with you at your worst when things get tough and therefore she don't deserve your best.

Easybela:
maybe she was too young or scared to go on with u in the first place, some girls due to home upbringing, avoids love affairs till they are matured enough. 4get the past,focus more on who she has become presently.

She was not matured but she knew the relationship was aimless?

Breaking up with me for being too nice is the only thing I remember anytime i feel i should give a chance.. i mean i am still that nice person so how’s it gonna work?

essenceplus:
Let her go. She's a conditional lover,when she gets comfortable again another instability will come their love is tied to matetial things. You will find someone that loves you for you. This one still has growing up to do

thank you bro

Easybela:
maybe she was too young or scared to go on with u in the first place, some girls due to home upbringing, avoids love affairs till they are matured enough. 4get the past,focus more on who she has become presently.

Op vehemently ignore this advice..she's a feminine supporter.

You were young too but you could reason that distance is not enough to stop you from saying hello or checking out on her once in a while ..that is very mature of you. In fact, it is the proper thing in any relationship, not only dating..even in family or normal friendship or
boss-apprentice relationship... never ever in life use words like "it is over, I have nothing to ever do with you again blah blah.." no one knows tomorrow. Even God who knows tomorrow never says it is over, let alone humans. She said so cus she was getting attention from men at that moment. Now her eyes are clear

Even older women have issues understanding how to moderate feelings; it's a real big problem for most of them.. they are always from one extreme feeling to another extreme. And relationships that last are based on moderation.. a little here a little there, not too much extreme of everything and these are same ppl who want equality with men when they know there's a huge difference. It's what they can't accept that they know how to do most.

My advice.. leave the girl alone, she's not your woman. You didn't really know her when she was young, all the she has all I need in a woman are just infatuation. You will see a better woman. This one is coming back to you because she lost her job when the dark clouds visit again which I don't pray, she will show you her real colour and leave you

May be she's completely confused now or she realized you're the best.

I cant school you on what you need to do,

But i can boldly beat my chest and tell you that girl have motives, and its not what you need.

its either now that she has come off age (starting to grow up from her hoe phase as she aint getting any younger and what she want aint comming forth so she has to settle for the available mr nice guy aka "captain save the evening newspapers") or she just trying to do what we call "Manage the Indomie before the Rice is ready".. She wants to eat her cake 4 as much as she want.

maybe she has a genuine feeling now ( i.e age and wisdom factor) and she feels remorseful (not like i've seen any lady done this when money aint invole)

But i can still boldly beat my chest and tell you that my last words are 0.1% or pure fallacy, however you understand it.

My brother, run................. Run very very far from that girl. She won use you take while away time before her mr right go come

Wilson125:
So i met this girl when she was in ss3 n i was about to start uni, we were both young but she was younger, we fell in love then but never had sex, after her secondary education she went to lag to stay with her uncle b4 she was offered admission into uni, when she was in lagos she told me she was not interested in relationship stuff anymore n i tried everything but shit didn’t work, her mind was made already.. i was still trying even in her uni days the day she asked me if i was that dull to see the zero possibility.. all through her uni days n even her nysc days in 2016/2017.. babe didn’t reason me in any way, after her nysc she had a job but the pay wasn’t reasonable..the thing is that in 2018 b4 she lost her job she started calling me on her to check up on me, i was even very surprised on the first day, didn’t know she still had ma number, now she wants back n she’s serious, though i still love her but when i ever I remember the words she used on me, different thoughts will fill ma mind, she has all the qualities i need in a woman but i’m just confused if on let her in ma life again cus sometimes i feel she back cus m doing well or something...

Be reasonable. She was young then.

SweetCunt97:
Be reasonable. She was young then.

how young? N she knew the relationship was aimless?
She knew i was too nice?
Well I’m still that nice guy so i doubt if it will work..

Wilson125:
how young?

Not easy to hold down a serious relationship that young. But d lady in question lacks tact

was she with other guys wen she left u?

SweetCunt97:
Not easy to hold down a serious relationship that young. But d lady in question lacks tact

story..
my ex was 15 when we started dating years ago.

hayzed1090:
was she with other guys wen she left u?

sure man, she was virgin according ti her when we met, but now she’s no more, so i believe she didn’t do it herself..

Wilson125:
sure man, she was virgin according ti her when we met, but now she’s no more, so i believe she didn’t do it herself..

case close then

SweetCunt97:
Not easy to hold down a serious relationship that young. But d lady in question lacks tact

omotola got married at 18 years...so did Janus wife
e....age has nothing to do with it..that gal is not serious and should be ignored;!

OP ,you know what to do..stop asking us for validation please!!..a leopard never changes its skin