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Misconception Of "I Stood By You When You Were Nothing". - Romance (5) - Nairaland

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Re: Misconception Of "I Stood By You When You Were Nothing". by Biglittlelois(f): 7:38pm On Jul 18, 2019
obeycian:
What if the broke lady had a rich dude disturbing her,yet she stood by you.. OP don't underestimate the power of love,cos when u fall in love,a million dollar from someone professing love to you wouldn't matter anymore.


Very correct, don't mind Op, his likes thinks ladies who stay with a broke guy are fools, not everyone is freeked with rich guys.

2 Likes

Re: Misconception Of "I Stood By You When You Were Nothing". by babakb: 7:38pm On Jul 18, 2019
eni4real:
In this "Next level"?? You dey try oo..
Bills are not smiling oo especially Tuition fees of Kids..

Well, maybe because i earn six figures.
Re: Misconception Of "I Stood By You When You Were Nothing". by Biglittlelois(f): 7:41pm On Jul 18, 2019
Adakintroy2:



Guy stop interpreting everything from angle of money fame aND intellect. It will slow you down rationally. Mold you into a more or ess one directional thinker.

Every loyalty deserves reward. If you already know the reason he or she stays around. He or she may not have money or intellect. But may have faith, patience, love hope. In other words they invest time. In a volatile world as ours now where you do not even know how long your good fortune will last. You stand a better guarantee with someone who has stood by you however you may think of them in the now.

If they can stay if you have nothing, then rest in the knowledge that they will always be around. Tried and trusted. That's all the stand bying you need.

Aside, true love absorb the future in the moment.

While some invest in you as a rational pursuit. That is take your educating and potentials into considerations. Some just love in the now and are caught up in it. They are not calculations what you may even become. They are happy spending there time here and now with you. Which in my view is the purest form of love. You becoming something may just be a light bonus for them.


@bolded wise words!!! Infact everything you typed is very apt.

1 Like

Re: Misconception Of "I Stood By You When You Were Nothing". by franchasng: 7:45pm On Jul 18, 2019
AstroG:
That was how one girl said that she stood by me when I was still broke. I asked her,what tangible thing did you do for me asides sex(that both of us enjoyed) she started stammering,started crying. I told her these ur tears na crocodile tears ooooh. Besides that,I had earlier told her to go and find something doing yrs back but she declined.

Naija bitches are Leeches,looking for who to perch on.


hahahahahaha that's it.

You stood by him when he had nothing, you what did you had then Were you rich Were your parents rich then that you stood by him, maybe feeding him, sponsoring him in school and probably loaned him big capital to startup business

You stood by him when he was nobody, as if she was somebody when she was standing by him.

Standing by him through sex that she also enjoys, and also gets compensated with weekend outings, transport fares, recharge cards, gifts, Valentine giveaways, Christmas gifts, Sallah gifts, and small spendings.

If you want to stand with a man when he is nobody, then you should be somebody of value; you should be rich or from rich family, you should be making positive impact in his life by contributing greatly to his financial struggles......not a poor, jobless girl telling a guy she stood by him when he was nobody as if she was somebody herself then.

Ladies if u are not rich and dating a poor guy and helping him grow by giving him money, connections and links, then u have no right to say you stood by him when he was nobody because you too were a nobody, you guys were just helping each other warm body and cure conji, he owes you nothing when he becomes successful unless you are very sure you contributed in making him rich and successful, if not, STFO!!? angry

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Re: Misconception Of "I Stood By You When You Were Nothing". by Bossjakande: 7:49pm On Jul 18, 2019
Biglittlelois:



Honestly ehn, if we should dwell on all the heart breaks we get for staying loyal to a man regardless of not been boxed up, some of us would never love again, we'd just go for guys strictly for money, and if you notice all the type of guys that are ungrateful, it's the ones that has never tasted real money before.
Lois am not happy wit u
Re: Misconception Of "I Stood By You When You Were Nothing". by AmNuhRegular(m): 7:52pm On Jul 18, 2019
I only don't agree with the part where the OP says the second Girl had the opportunity to meet or be with someone better than him , but she stayed.
The first girl could still do that if she wanted to , no matter how uneducated she is, she could still be with a rich guy.

Plus, sticking by a guy when he's broke is no guarantee that he'll also stick with you when he's rich. They say you test the love of a woman when there's no money. But money also brings out the true character of a man. So love who you want to love and stick with whoever you chose it's no big deal.

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Re: Misconception Of "I Stood By You When You Were Nothing". by Tessae(f): 7:54pm On Jul 18, 2019
mmadu5:



This post doesn't change anything
I wish you'd meet someone that'll change your mentality....you should
Re: Misconception Of "I Stood By You When You Were Nothing". by AstroG: 7:55pm On Jul 18, 2019
franchasng:
hahahahahaha that's it.

You stood by him when he had nothing, you what did you had then Were you rich Were your parents rich then that you stood by him, maybe feeding him, sponsoring him in school and probably loaned him big capital to startup business

You stood by him when he was nobody, as if she was somebody when she was standing by him.

Standing by him through sex that she also enjoys, and also gets compensated with weekend outings, transport fares, recharge cards, gifts, Valentine giveaways, Christmas gifts, Sallah gifts, and small spendings.

If you want to stand with a man when he is nobody, then you should be somebody of value; you should be rich or from rich family, you should be making positive impact in his life by contributing greatly to his financial struggles......not a poor, jobless girl telling a guy she stood by him when he was nobody as if she was somebody herself then.

Ladies if u are not rich and dating a poor guy and helping him grow by giving him money, connections and links, then u have no right to say you stood by him when he was nobody because you too were a nobody, you guys were just helping each other warm body and cure conji, he owes you nothing when he becomes successful unless you are very sure you contributed in making him rich and successful, if not, STFO!!? angry

Re: Misconception Of "I Stood By You When You Were Nothing". by 1x2x3: 7:56pm On Jul 18, 2019
loswhite:
so what if she is poor and a richer guy is coming for her and she decides to leave you, why do you ppl come and cry afterall who is sticking with who? Your point is very wrong. A beautiful girl that is wise can use her beauty to climb up the ladder.

Lol... Like wtf. I won't even stop her or cry afterwards. There's no need playing victim.
Re: Misconception Of "I Stood By You When You Were Nothing". by AstroG: 7:57pm On Jul 18, 2019
Xisnin:






If you really believed she had nothing to offer, why not dump her and get a better partner.
Who wants to be entangled with a useless partner?

Of course, we both know the truth and you are just playing to the gallery.


Dry piece of shit

Re: Misconception Of "I Stood By You When You Were Nothing". by mmadu5(m): 7:57pm On Jul 18, 2019
Tessae:

I wish you'd meet someone that'll change your mentality....you should


maybe i can start with you , can we meet? grin grin grin
Re: Misconception Of "I Stood By You When You Were Nothing". by Tessae(f): 7:58pm On Jul 18, 2019
seanwilliam:
did she contribute anytin to beta the guy's life?
What do you mean by contribute...how about you start by explaining that. You want her to cut her heart open or sacrifice her mom before you acknowledge all her efforts??
Re: Misconception Of "I Stood By You When You Were Nothing". by 1x2x3: 7:58pm On Jul 18, 2019
mmadu5:



maybe i can start with you , can we meet? grin grin grin

Shot delivered accurately.

1 Like

Re: Misconception Of "I Stood By You When You Were Nothing". by emmnprince(m): 7:59pm On Jul 18, 2019
Then you were friends with sex benefit abi?
You self you no try enough. If you love her well, I mean love in action, not word, you would have done every possible to uplift her to a level you will be proud of. So what's your boasting then! You have nothing tangible to offer her yourself aside sex.

2 Likes

Re: Misconception Of "I Stood By You When You Were Nothing". by franchasng: 8:01pm On Jul 18, 2019
pocohantas:


I expected your response. When you push aside the woman who built with you and marry a younger one to make her first lady or controller of your estate. That isn't abandonment ba?

If I abandon my broke bf who contributed nothing but prick and love. He will run to NL to create thread, telling everyone who cares to listen how I dumped him after getting a good job.

The general consensus would be how women can't handle power and/or how they change when they see small money. It will never be how he contributed nothing besides love and no sane woman would abandon a man who helped build her.

Abandonment is abandonment, be it taking additional wives or total cut off. Neither of them was the initial plan when you had nothing.
Only useless men do that, and I hate it, I condemn it, unless their first wife committed a big offense to them which they couldn't forgive, then I have nothing to say, but if not, such men are mad!


But not all first wives suffered with their husbands. Some are just there waiting for the man to become rich without any contribution aside getting pregnant and giving births, nothing else, and their husbands maybe angry in their hearts and already carrying grudges against them and once the man breaks even financially, he begins to show his long standing anger and resentment towards his wife by marrying second wife.

But I condemn it still.

Most men didn't marry their sweethearts as first wife. Some men married out of family pressure, some married through the lady's women deception and entrapment (some women use pregnancy, emotional blackmail, etc) to entrap men to marry them.

So in such cases, if the men later became rich, they can damn the consequence and go for a second wife to fulfil their youthful lust and desire.


In the case of ladies, they think once they agreed to date a guy while he was young, that it automatically means he must marry them once he becomes successful, which brings up another topic: Nigerian ladies date guys with the hope he will become rich so they can start flexing muscle: I stood by him when he was a nobody, as if they themselves were somebody when they were dating the guy.

Before u as a lady should say u stood by him when he was a nobody, you should be somebody when u started stooding abi standing by him; you should be a pretty rich girl giving him money and connections to become somebody. Standing by him when he was nobody only through sex is nonsensical nonsense and bullcrap!!

Who are you when you were standing by him What impact did you make in his life when he was the nobody

You can only say that bullshit if he was broke and ugly while you the lady was pretty and rich, so we can then say ah she tried oh, she stooped too low to date that guy who was a nobody.

Not a poor girl from a poor family contributing nothing to a guy aside sex she also enjoyed saying she stood by him when he was nobody, as if she was anybody herself angry

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Re: Misconception Of "I Stood By You When You Were Nothing". by Tessae(f): 8:01pm On Jul 18, 2019
mmadu5:



maybe i can start with you , can we meet? grin grin
grin
You're a character....just one question....did someone put you in this state of mind or it's just something you randomly believe in
Re: Misconception Of "I Stood By You When You Were Nothing". by pocohantas(f): 8:03pm On Jul 18, 2019
franchasng:
Only useless men do that, and I hate it, I condemn it, unless their first wife committed a big offense to them which they couldn't forgive, then I have nothing to say, but if not, such men are mad!


But not all first wives suffered with their husbands. Some are just there waiting for the man to become rich without any contribution aside getting oregnant and giving births, nothing else, and their husbands maybe angry in their hearts and already carrying grudges against them and once the break even, they begin to show their long standing anger and resentment towards their wife by marrying second wife.

But I condemn it still.

Most men didn't marry their sweethearts as first wife. Some men married out of family pressure, some married through the lady's women deception and entrapment (some women use pregnancy, emotional blackmail, etc) to entrap men to marry them.

So in such cases, if the men later became rich, they can damn the consequence and go for a second wife to fulfil their youthful lust and desire.


In the case of ladies, they think once they agreed to date a guy while he was young, that it automatically means he must marry them once he becomes successful, which brings up another topic: Nigerian ladies date guys with the hope he will become rich so they can start flexing muscle: I stood by him when he was a nobody, as if they themselves were somebody when they were dating the guy.

Before u as a lady should say u stood by him when he was a nobody, you should be somebody when u started stooding abi standing by him; you should be a pretty rich girl giving him money and connections to become somebody. Standing by him when he was nobody only through sex is nonsensical nonsense and bullcrap!!

Who are you when you were standing by him What impact did you make in his life when he was the nobody

You can only say that bullshit if he was broke and ugly while you the lady was pretty and rich, so we can then say ah she tried oh, she stooped too low to date that guy who was a nobody.

Not a poor girl from a poor family contributing nothing to a guy aside sex she also enjoyed saying she stood by him when he was nobody, as if she was anybody herself angry

Okay...
Re: Misconception Of "I Stood By You When You Were Nothing". by franchasng: 8:05pm On Jul 18, 2019
Tessae:

What do you mean by contribute...how about you start by explaining that. You want her to cut her heart open or sacrifice her mom before you acknowledge all her efforts??
how much money did she contributed in making him who he is today

Did she ever borrowed him huge sum of money to start a business, execute a project or complete a contract deal or give him some business connections or helped him secured a job or helped him travel outside the country to a better country with opportunities or helped him pay school fees or helped him pay house rents or acquire some money making equipment or facility

In what ways did she contributed in making him who he became to warrant her to say I stood by him when he was a nobody

In what way was she standing by him; is it only by sex which is a mutual emotional share which she also enjoyed

Sex is nothing, it has no value, it adds no value to a mans life, so how did she stood by him

1 Like

Re: Misconception Of "I Stood By You When You Were Nothing". by Nobody: 8:05pm On Jul 18, 2019
babakb:


Well, maybe because i earn six figures.
Wow!
Re: Misconception Of "I Stood By You When You Were Nothing". by Nobody: 8:06pm On Jul 18, 2019
PoliticalChinex:


She is not developing herself. Her only contribution to my life is the promise to wait and pray for me as if i have not been praying for myself.

Meanwhile, i am not poor myself coz i have been working hard to work myself to full-time masters degree in a top university with top grades. So get the gist beta b4 u judge wrongly
What about the psychological support and the peace of mind she offers?? tongue
Re: Misconception Of "I Stood By You When You Were Nothing". by mmadu5(m): 8:06pm On Jul 18, 2019
1x2x3:


Shot delivered accurately.

Mr shot analyst I hail ooo lol
Re: Misconception Of "I Stood By You When You Were Nothing". by mmadu5(m): 8:08pm On Jul 18, 2019
Tessae:

You're a character....just one question....did someone put you in this state of mind or it's just something you randomly believe in


My dear actually experience is the best teacher I have seen and witness these things either from friends or close relatives .
Re: Misconception Of "I Stood By You When You Were Nothing". by Tessae(f): 8:08pm On Jul 18, 2019
franchasng:
how much money did she contributed in making him who he is today

Did she ever borrowed him huge sum of money to start a business, execute a project or complete a contract deal or give him some business connections or helped him secured a job or helped him travel outside the country to a better country with opportunities or helped him pay school fees or helped him pay house rents or acquire some money making equipment or facility

In what ways did she contributed in making him who he became to warrant her to say I stood by him when he was a nobody

In what way was she standing by him; is it only by sex which is a mutual emotional share which she also enjoyed

Sex is nothing, it has no value, it adds no value to a mans life, so how did she stood by him
Ohh Jeez....I'm sure you didn't think about this before you hit submit....I give up cos there's no convincing to do and I'm not even going to try

1 Like

Re: Misconception Of "I Stood By You When You Were Nothing". by Tessae(f): 8:10pm On Jul 18, 2019
mmadu5:



My dear actually experience is the best teacher I have seen and witness these things either from friends or close relatives .
You probably didn't hear the full story but you can't judge all cases by what you've seen your friends or relatives experience
Re: Misconception Of "I Stood By You When You Were Nothing". by Nobody: 8:10pm On Jul 18, 2019
franchasng:
hahahahahaha that's it.

You stood by him when he had nothing, you what did you had then Were you rich Were your parents rich then that you stood by him, maybe feeding him, sponsoring him in school and probably loaned him big capital to startup business

You stood by him when he was nobody, as if she was somebody when she was standing by him.

Standing by him through sex that she also enjoys, and also gets compensated with weekend outings, transport fares, recharge cards, gifts, Valentine giveaways, Christmas gifts, Sallah gifts, and small spendings.

If you want to stand with a man when he is nobody, then you should be somebody of value; you should be rich or from rich family, you should be making positive impact in his life by contributing greatly to his financial struggles......not a poor, jobless girl telling a guy she stood by him when he was nobody as if she was somebody herself then.

Ladies if u are not rich and dating a poor guy and helping him grow by giving him money, connections and links, then u have no right to say you stood by him when he was nobody because you too were a nobody, you guys were just helping each other warm body and cure conji, he owes you nothing when he becomes successful unless you are very sure you contributed in making him rich and successful, if not, STFO!!? angry
The poor lady may reject a rich suitor just because she believed in you despite being broke..
Don't take love for granted tongue tongue
Re: Misconception Of "I Stood By You When You Were Nothing". by mmadu5(m): 8:16pm On Jul 18, 2019
Tessae:

You probably didn't hear the full story but you can't judge all cases by what you've seen your friends or relatives experience


ok my dear check this out, your in a relationship with a guy maybe the guy is not rich he does the little he can make you happy , while he works hard to make his life better then finally God answered his prayers he becomes rich you now come and say you suffered with him when he had nothing or you made him who he is , what kind of mentality is that so you see where im coming from . if women will see relationship as normal BOY friend and Girl friend situation without expectation then this world would become a better place , i always tell my fellow guys dont go and carry a girl when your still hustling because she will slow you down , if she is the type that doesn't have aim in life . but i am willing to be proven wrong . so would you madam tessy change my mentality ? i would like to know omaricha nwa
Re: Misconception Of "I Stood By You When You Were Nothing". by Biglittlelois(f): 8:20pm On Jul 18, 2019
Bossjakande:
Lois am not happy wit u

What did I do?
Re: Misconception Of "I Stood By You When You Were Nothing". by Ladygenny: 8:24pm On Jul 18, 2019
Re: Misconception Of "I Stood By You When You Were Nothing". by Tessae(f): 8:25pm On Jul 18, 2019
mmadu5:



ok my dear check this out, your in a relationship with a guy maybe the guy is not rich he does the little he can make you happy , while he works hard to make his life better then finally God answered his prayers he becomes rich you now come and say you suffered with him when he had nothing or you made him who he is , what kind of mentality is that so you see where im coming from . if women will see relationship as normal BOY friend and Girl friend situation without expectation then this world would become a better place , i always tell my fellow guys dont go and carry a girl when your still hustling because she will slow you down , if she is the type that doesn't have aim in life . but i am willing to be proven wrong . so would you madam tessy change my mentality ? i would like to know omaricha nwa
There are other girls that are opposite of what you typed tho...I'd love to change your mentality if not for anything but to prove you wrong but I'm in a relationship
Re: Misconception Of "I Stood By You When You Were Nothing". by otipoju(m): 8:28pm On Jul 18, 2019
AstroG:
That was how one girl said that she stood by me when I was still broke. I asked her,what tangible thing did you do for me asides sex(that both of us enjoyed) she started stammering,started crying. I told her these ur tears na crocodile tears ooooh. Besides that,I had earlier told her to go and find something doing yrs back but she declined.

Naija bitches are Leeches,looking for who to perch on.



I once asked one girl that question after 5 years of dating and she could not point to one single thing she did. Wether cash pr kind....meanwhile i turned up in major ways severally for her growth and devwlopment.

Las las na insult end am. Its all in the past now and i bless God wey no let them turn him pikin to laughing stock. But i wasted 6 good years on that parasite.
Re: Misconception Of "I Stood By You When You Were Nothing". by franchasng: 8:28pm On Jul 18, 2019
eni4real:
The poor lady may reject a rich suitor just because she believed in you despite being broke..
Don't take love for granted tongue tongue
romantic love is a fallacy, please note that!!


True love has no condition.

But in the scenario you gave above, she may have rejected the rich guy out of fear that he maybe a ritualist or a cheat or a playboy who will cheat on her or beat her, or just scared of rich guys. Some poor ladies are usually scared of marrying rich guys thinking he may use them for money ritual.

So she settled for the broke guy she is comfortable with hoping that he will become successful in future.

There is no selfless, non conditional romantic love anywhere
Re: Misconception Of "I Stood By You When You Were Nothing". by Jewingle(m): 8:43pm On Jul 18, 2019
LordAdam16:


Logged in to give you a thumbs up for this!

This is the primary reason why I don't take sides on this and similar matters.

The major problem is that people know they're inherently selfish and that it's a natural trait (sometimes understandable), but like to make up excuses or reasons to somehow feel good about themselves or deflect judgement.

Your ex-friend would defo not find it funny if he'd been at the receiving end of same treatment; but he has no problem dishing it out because he's selfish. Most people are: Both genders. Now, if folks owned up to their selfish and self-centered misgivings, it'd be swell; but they wouldn't.

I mean look at the OP's question! What logical explanation does he have for not helping out the first lady if he has the means to do so? How hard could it f*cking be to do sth tangible for the individuals who in one way or the other had your back when the going was tough? Not because they're entitled to it, but because you're a decent human being.

But it's unsurprising. I mean there's a good reason there's a saying, you only know your real friends when things are rough. And that power intoxicates.

-Lord
i just read this comment and just smiled to myself. Truth of the matter is just as you said, most people are very selfish and only cared about themselves . I dated a girl while in school for several years and I can’t count the number of times she has help me when times where tough. To the point we practically started living together to save rent because she sacrificed her rent when I couldn’t come up with mine. I would say she was a blessing that period to me because for two years when I was dead broke she was there. Things where very difficult for me to the point she have to sacrifice buying things for her self like makeups, cloths and shoes so we could just have atleast two square meal each day for the rest of the week until she gets her monthly upkeep money.
She was just 19 I was 23. Long story cut short, she got tired towards her final year and wanted breaking up because everything was unbearable for her and also felt at the end I won’t even marry her so why killing herself. I felt she discussed with her friends and they advised her, couple with my own issues too. A broke guy is always angry and has low self esteem because even when ur girl is faithful, u would always think she’s cheating on you. We began having little issues and stuffs and finally she left. She never cheated while we where together. I was hurt and devastated because she left at my most vulnerable time.
After several months, things where back to normal for me. Most guys would never ever remember her again but I still remember all the good times we had and how she has always been there even though she didn’t stay till the end. She has her own girls issues too but she was there financially, emotionally and psychologically.
Till date we still communicate and I send her cash sometimes because I know it’s not easy.
Right now I’m really confused if I still love her or I’m just being caring and nice to her out of pity because of the times we had been together and how she practically saved my sorry as for years.
And for if she loves me, yes that girl still loves me but I don’t want to marry out of self pity. I’m just a confused guy honestly.

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