pich4real:
Hello everyone, my name is paul and am a serving corp member in bayelsa (N. Y. S. C) since childhood i have been battling with a speech disorder (stuttering), and for as long as i can remember it has made me an introvert.
Let me rewind to my school days, i can't vividly remember how i stuttered all through my primary school days, but I can during secondary school. It has made me build a wall around my self therefore making me less social and hard to access because It hurts, i mean it hurts so deep like a knife through the heart, you will only understand this if are in my shoes because you're becoming something or somebody your not. You have a lot to say or an issue to shed light on in the midst of your colleagues and the moment you open your mouth words fail you. In the midst of all you look stupid and your frozen. And that's because you don't know whether the next word coming straight out your mouth is going to sound like ma! ma!! ma! Na! Na! Name is paul, and by the time you open your eyes and your catching your breath to recover you are realising that there's a crowd in front of you and you just messed up big time.
When your done stuttering through every word and your taking your seat everyone is gonna be like "so this young man is a stammer" and that's the painful part and not all of us can deal with it.
Fast-forward to today, there was a meeting with my fellow corp members and my lg inspector was around, every coordinator spoke and it came to my turn to address the crowd, even before i stood up i was scared for myself, i was not scared of what to say but I was scared that my mouth would fail me leaving me stupid and empty in the faces my colleagues and just as I predicted, i stood up and i stammered my way all through. But as i looked at the faces of everyone while expressing my self and gesticulating with my hands I tried not to stutter but the more I tried not to the more I did, i was representing my group but it looked as If i failed them. I love to express my self, i love to be heard but i just cant deal with this, its tearing me apart, it making me feel empty, I don't want to be pitied on.
After the whole discussion and we closed, I couldn't look at the faces of everyone, I just bowed my head like a man drunk with regret and walked out.

pich4real:
Hello everyone, my name is paul and am a serving corp member in bayelsa (N. Y. S. C) since childhood i have been battling with a speech disorder (stuttering), and for as long as i can remember it has made me an introvert.
Let me rewind to my school days, i can't vividly remember how i stuttered all through my primary school days, but I can during secondary school. It has made me build a wall around my self therefore making me less social and hard to access because It hurts, i mean it hurts so deep like a knife through the heart, you will only understand this if are in my shoes because you're becoming something or somebody your not. You have a lot to say or an issue to shed light on in the midst of your colleagues and the moment you open your mouth words fail you. In the midst of all you look stupid and your frozen. And that's because you don't know whether the next word coming straight out your mouth is going to sound like ma! ma!! ma! Na! Na! Name is paul, and by the time you open your eyes and your catching your breath to recover you are realising that there's a crowd in front of you and you just messed up big time.
When your done stuttering through every word and your taking your seat everyone is gonna be like "so this young man is a stammer" and that's the painful part and not all of us can deal with it.
Fast-forward to today, there was a meeting with my fellow corp members and my lg inspector was around, every coordinator spoke and it came to my turn to address the crowd, even before i stood up i was scared for myself, i was not scared of what to say but I was scared that my mouth would fail me leaving me stupid and empty in the faces my colleagues and just as I predicted, i stood up and i stammered my way all through. But as i looked at the faces of everyone while expressing my self and gesticulating with my hands I tried not to stutter but the more I tried not to the more I did, i was representing my group but it looked as If i failed them. I love vr to express my self, i love to be heard but i just cant deal with this, its tearing me apart, it making me feel empty, I don't want to be pitied on.
After the whole discussion and we closed, I couldn't look at the faces of everyone, I just bowed my head like a man drunk with regret and walked out.