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An Old Man's Talk. - Literature - Nairaland

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An Old Man's Talk. by sledge406: 10:38am On Oct 18, 2010
Written by Mbofung Ikenna


Culture and tradition have imbibed in us, respect for our elders, taking heed to their advices and even crowning them “the wise ones”. For with the grey hair comes experience, wisdom and most times sayings that either make you wiser or shows how stupid one is when trying to interpret them. Even in the bible, the use of parables and proverbs were foreign to some, which only showed their ignorance.

Most times when we are confronted with an old grey we always pay full attention and nod heads in agreement even when we just don’t seem to make sense of what is being said (I feel they do it just so you realise their grey hair). This was the situation I found myself one day, here I was watching TV with an old grey, what was on was about weed (Egbo), he (old grey) then asks, “how do you feel about weed?”

See me see question; in all honesty I answered: It is not good for the health.

Old grey: How? Isn’t it used in prescribed drugs?

Me: Because it doesn’t make one act right and think straight when taken excessively.

Old grey: How do you mean?

At this point I was stuck, truth be told, I really didn’t know more than I had heard about it. (E dey make person high) How was I to explain highness?

Old grey: So to you it is bad because you heard and because people say it is bad.

Me: Yes!

Old grey: So what would you say about people who smoke it and enjoy it and to them it is good?

Me: emmmmm (scratching head).

Truth is before you can say something is bad, it is best to experience it and if you see it is bad for you then you can say “it is bad for you”. But don’t make the mistake of going about telling people that enjoy something that it is bad for them.

At this point I was confused. I was thinking, killing is bad, does that mean I have to go out and kill before I realise it is bad? I guess he was reading my mind hence he said further, it doesn’t apply when it gets to involve doing it to someone else. My next thought was sex, immediately he says for example, rape. Sex has to be consensual for it to not be bad. But when one party doesn’t give in, it is bad.

Me: Are you saying I can have sex so long the girl agrees, Uncle?

Now it was his turn to scratch his old grey hair. . . grin

Old grey: I’m not talking about morally right or wrong, ten commandments but talking about things we do to ourselves. Example, most people that commit suicide are perceived as doing something wrong, to the suicider it is good, a means to an end and when they do, they feel good about it but when they don’t succeed they realise it is wrong. Same goes for smoking, drinking and every thing we tag morally wrong personal acts.

From there he went on to quote different proverbs, "one man’s food is another man's poison", "when a tree grows across into another mans land, it doesn’t make it the other mans own". . .(still don’t know how this applies), "experience is the best teacher". So my question was, is he advising me to smoke weed or just trying to find out if I had smoked weed? I guess he really was saying I should have a personal opinion of decisions I make, experience things before I make an opinion. So does he mean I should try committing suicide and see the effects, good or bad or start doing drugs to know the effects so that I won’t come up blank the next time an old grey asks me same questions? I really started feeling dumb since I really couldn’t understand his point.

Not to look stupid I coined my own conclusion; keep your own opinions to yourself when you know you know nothing about something. Don’t go forcing your own morals on someone else’s. Smart one, right? Lol. Everyone has a reason for their personal actions be it bad or good and what draws the line of right or wrong is EXPERIENCE. So yes, experience is the best teacher. If you know you haven’t experienced something, please shut up when the experienced ones are talking. Experienced ones like old greys, let them do the talking and ‘we’ get confused cause we are all devoid of experience and if you're smart enough you’ll pick up a thing or two, but if ye be stupid, you’ll be left confused like you are right now. wink

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