Cutehector:

*coughs*


What's the look for?

asdfjklhaha:
Husbands please will you be happy with your wife,if you discover she is saving from the house keep money? Please give reasons.

I went to spend sometime with my elder sister along with my mum cos she just delivered. And recently her husband was quarreling with her it got so serious that mumsy had to intervene. after everything died down, I asked mumsy what happened she said the man was very angry because his wife which is my sister has been saving money from the upkeep money he's been given to her.

that if she had any left overs she should have told him so he'll add it to the next money he'll give and spend less. he said she's selfish and inconsiderate.

for me I don't see any big deal in it cos as a woman a nursing mother she should have some cash in hand.

please what are your views

Well, it depends on the economic status of the man. If he's struggling financially then it would be inconsiderate making him spend more. The anger stems more from keeping it as a secret.

Another thing is to know if the wife is working or a full house wife. If she's a full house wife then the upkeep money will include money for her personal use.

But if the man is doing well. This won't be an issue as there will be more from where the money is coming from. The man won't even mind if you decide to save from it as he gives you more than enough as long as its not being wasted and you are not compromising on the richness of the food or what the money should be used for.

Finally its an individual thing. Keeping secrets in marriage is not healthy. If the woman married an understanding man, then he will even encourage and support her and it builds love between them.

JasonScoolari:
In my own opinion, I think your sister's husband is just acting all up because of you guys there..... I might be wrong though, but which present day Nigerian man go dey vex for such a JEWEL and beautiful OSUSU oriented wife?

Even Dangote sef still dey find money.

See as you hammer the matter like Mathias. You be carpentar? Take this one flex small.

@Op, this bros don yarn the Koko.

Acidosis:


So long as the purpose or reason behind the savings is genuine, it's no big deal. But then again, how can you save from house keep money without lying, deliberately overstating costs of goods or reducing stated quantity of goods?

I'm forced to believe you didn't get the full gists. There's no way your sis could save without lying, and yeah, every reasonable spouse detest lies.

This reminds me of a joke where a headmaster told the teachers to inform students to pay #100, teachers told students to pay #120, students told mum they were asked to pay #150, mum told a struggling Dad that his son was told to bring #200 to school.

asdfjklhaha:

even if he's my brother I wouldn't support him. it's totally wrong. does he expect his wife to be begging him for money to settle petty personal needs? she's a woman for crying out loud.

Is she a full time house wife?

bukatyne:


What is the definition of upkeep money?

1. Money to run the home only i.e. food, bills, clothing etc
2. No 1 above + her private pocket money

If 1, the husband is right to be angry because except he is very rich, the money would be barely enough so excess should be declared so proper budgeting and allocating of funds done. He would however be funny if there is no provision for personal allowance for his wife and he expects her to return the excess.

If 2 and your sister doesn't shortchange the home to increase her savings, the husband should tell us what is really biting him.

If the wife is working, is there really need for personal allowance except if the man is financially buoyant.

How does the woman come up to help the man financially. Our Sunday school teacher taught us that year that a wife is a help meet.

Why should I? But my kpomo in soup must complete always.

You can own a 1kva solar inverter today.

CHECK MY SIGNATURE NOW

vickydevoka:
I can say de man is right n wrong depending on ur partner. My papa no get wahala bcus him get excess. Buh my neighbour no go happy with him wife cus him de manage.. Please ladies try n understand ur husband or his condition buh doing dat

That's right. Its the man's condition we should consider. He who wears the shoe knows where it is pinching.

What if he's making sacrifices like trekking to work, skipping meals just to meet up while the wife is tasking him just to keep some aside.

Fxwarrior:


Is she a full time house wife?

No. She has a shop but it's been closed for some weeks now cos she's nursing a baby

Bbbwings:

Kindly join the queue.
We are many on her case

Lol. What God has joined together, let no one separate. She's married.

Truth is that, she's the real definition of an independent/strong-minded woman. Strength of character, not money, is what makes one independent - this doesn't invalidate the importance of money in any way.

corruption starts when money meant for a purpose is not utilized for this purpose.The purpose of her saving the money is what will determine if she was right or wrong.Both people have to be interviewed before judging.if the man has been broke and had asked the woman for help and she denied having money. the man has a reason to be angry.There are women who will save a whole lot of money from house upkeep to use for their own selfish personal needs.They wil even still pretend to be broke and ask for more money

ornicus:



oga has been sweating and slaving and growing old putting money for food that he could hae used for school fees or to repair car. he has been deferring important projects because of high cost of food. he has been jugging and struggling with multiple income streams so the family does not go hungry. meanwhile madam has been goat and yamming the hard earned money on her ow special projects. you think the man does not have other special projects he could have used the money on?

nigerian women and entitlement mentality

Women are natural manipulative beings you have reported this case one sided making your sisters husband look foolish, he gives your sister hard earned money in this buhari era to get enough food stuffs, and other necessities for the house, she cuts it and buys things that won’t last long, in few weeks she would complain again that food is finished, this strains the mans pocket cos he is already projected that food would be enough for a month.. that’s women gameplay inorder to get money to give their mums, ..

asdfjklhaha:

No. She has a shop but it's been closed for some weeks now cos she's nursing a baby

Communication is important in marriage. She alone knows the type of man she married.

His anger could be if she hides this, who knows what else she could be hiding.

Lack of communication brings distrust. Its little things not sorted that leads to bigger issues.

asdfjklhaha:
Husbands please will you be happy with your wife,if you discover she is saving from the house keep money? Please give reasons.

I went to spend sometime with my elder sister along with my mum cos she just delivered. And recently her husband was quarreling with her it got so serious that mumsy had to intervene. after everything died down, I asked mumsy what happened she said the man was very angry because his wife which is my sister has been saving money from the upkeep money he's been given to her.

that if she had any left overs she should have told him so he'll add it to the next money he'll give and spend less. he said she's selfish and inconsiderate.

for me I don't see any big deal in it cos as a woman a nursing mother she should have some cash in hand.

please what are your views

That man is not wise. The woman is a rare gem.

nextstep:
It's wise for every woman to do so, in case of incasity. The husband is mad that she's being prudent and saving... doesn't he know that there will be lean times and fat times?

Some women will save the money to shortchange the home . Adequate provision of food and other necessities are not taking care of ,and when the need arises for petty spendings , she will still bother the husband .I know some of them , very selfish and wicked !

capitalzero:


That man is not wise. The woman is a rare gem.

it is either you are a woman talking out of sentiments or a man who have no experience of women's behaviors

asdfjklhaha:
Husbands please will you be happy with your wife,if you discover she is saving from the house keep money? Please give reasons.

I went to spend sometime with my elder sister along with my mum cos she just delivered. And recently her husband was quarreling with her it got so serious that mumsy had to intervene. after everything died down, I asked mumsy what happened she said the man was very angry because his wife which is my sister has been saving money from the upkeep money he's been given to her.

that if she had any left overs she should have told him so he'll add it to the next money he'll give and spend less. he said she's selfish and inconsiderate.

for me I don't see any big deal in it cos as a woman a nursing mother she should have some cash in hand.

please what are your views

The guy struggles every month to meet up with the monthly upkeep. It is a wrong move from his wife

LordKO:


Lol. What God has joined together, let no one separate. She's married.

Truth is that, she's the real definition of an independent/strong-minded woman. Strength of character, not money, is what makes one independent - this doesn't invalidate the importance of money in any way.

Independent woman ? Then what does she do with the money she should be making from her own work ? I think an independent woman should be working too . This one is obviously greedy and selfish

I will not be angry with her since I know her ATM PIN number. You understand want I mean?��

Nah. It's a wonderful thing. It means she is smart. Trust me, that money would come in handy someday. The man should just learn to overlook it and instead, focus on meeting the weekly/monthly requirement. The wife too needs some things she needn't tell the husband.

But...


I love my wife

fortune1968:
it is either you are a woman talking out of sentiments or a man who have no experience of women's behaviors

is it a crime to save from upkeep money? I have budget for my family-kids, wife,food etc. Budget is budget,I stick with it.. If she is saving the money or sending to her people, that is not my business as long as she uses the money for intended purpose . Some women know to manage money, spending less to get more commodities. There should be reward for wise spending. So let them save remaining change . Life is too short to argue over simple matter.

DesChyko:
Nah. It's a wonderful thing. It means she is smart. Trust me, that money would come in handy someday. The man should just learn to overlook it and instead, focus on meeting the weekly/monthly requirement. The wife too needs some things she needn't tell the husband.

But...


I love my wife

Thank you. My thought

asdfjklhaha:

even if he's my brother I wouldn't support him. it's totally wrong. does he expect his wife to be begging him for money to settle petty personal needs? she's a woman for crying out loud.

She no get work or personal business she runs?

fortune1968:
Independent woman ? Then what does she do with the money she should be making from her own work ? I think an independent woman should be working too . This one is obviously greedy and selfish

It's obvious that you quoted the wrong person, because you neither know the genesis of my submission nor understand it.

Abeg, make una forgive the man.

victorian:







*coughs*


What's the look for?

my friend go and look up the meaning of cool in the dictionary and stop embarrassing yourself in my presence.

asdfjklhaha:

even if he's my brother I wouldn't support him. it's totally wrong. does he expect his wife to be begging him for money to settle petty personal needs? she's a woman for crying out loud.

You guys had better advice your sister to gear up and start looking for a job as soon as her child is 6months. She needs her own money to at least take care of her personal needs since the husband is not happy for her to save from the money he drops.
Let her not be carried away by saying she is a full housewife looking after their children. With that kind of husband vexing that she's saving, she will have regrets later if she doesnt start earning her own money soon

It's wrong, she should have told him she has some change left with her instead of demanding for another money again, that's not love, it means she's not trustworthy, as an house wife, the man should be giving her money even before demanding for it, in that way she won't keep the left over upkeep money.

Fxwarrior:


This reminds me of a joke where a headmaster told the teachers to inform students to pay #100, teachers told students to pay #120, students told mum they were asked to pay #150, mum told a struggling Dad that his son was told to bring #200 to school.

Lol, and the struggling dad may defraud his employer to foot his bills.

What concerns me with money that i have given my wife to prepare food... Provided food dey dey table

JasonScoolari:
In my own opinion, I think your sister's husband is just acting all up because of you guys there..... I might be wrong though, but which present day Nigerian man go dey vex for such a JEWEL and beautiful OSUSU oriented wife?

Even Dangote sef still dey find money.

did you read this part?

that if she had any left overs she should have told him so he'll add it to the next money he'll give and spend less. he said she's selfish and inconsiderate.

ornicus:



oga has been sweating and slaving and growing old putting money for food that he could hae used for school fees or to repair car. he has been deferring important projects because of high cost of food. he has been jugging and struggling with multiple income streams so the family does not go hungry. meanwhile madam has been goat and yamming the hard earned money on her ow special projects. you think the man does not have other special projects he could have used the money on?

nigerian women and entitlement mentality

No Nigerian woman should be a housewife, giving up her dreams, personal development and career for nanny duties/housekeeping and chef duties. Unless of course if your husband is a Dangote or a Danjuma, or if he at least understands you need money of your own and makes provision for it
Most times it ends in tears.
However, many Nigerian men are still not ready for that either. They want all the benefits a full housewife can provide such as childcare, housekeeping, chef duties but still expect the same woman to be at the top of her career with her own money.
Struggling couples should both be working, contributing to the home together financially, in the kitchen, with childcare, housekeeping etc. That way, both will have the opportunity to grow individually.