Lexusgs430:


Which brings us back, full circle........

Lol

brandon2009:
hmmn orisirisi....konji na bastard ;Dhmmn orisirisi....konji na bastard

That is how they blame their every irresponsibility on konji ! Smh!

loveymom:


The fact your husband is denying it is nauseating

Please call a family meeting and invite both your niece and her family, your family and your husband's family. So that the both parties will face themselves and you will find out the truth.

Without the truth you won't be able to know how to handle this matter.

Agneseze

If you follow this advice, you will crumble your marriage with your own hands. It doesn't mean it is a faulty advise, you just need to determine if you want to settle this or your want to throw blames.

D first person to blame is the OP. You brought a matured female into your own home because u couldn't take your of your home yourself.

A man and a woman are wired differently. Firstly, a man is attracted by what they see n u brought him something to see. Secondly, a man might vow never to touch a woman, but if the woman touches him...then... Since she wasn't raped, she could have initiated it.

Your husband did it but you cannot allow this ruin your marriage. You must also not allow him lose face. That child is yours but you must ensure it never happens again, n your ability to ensure this doesn't happen depends on d level of influence you have on him.

Please confirm that it is or is not rape.

That is what you should be most concerned with right now.

What again do you wanna believe, are you saying that the girl didn't know who was removing her pants and doing the do.


...your husband volunteered to take her to the hospital?

This is dangerous depending on the kind of people that they are.

They could use this as an avenue to insult, belittle or even badmouth her.

calgaryFriend:

But how does inviting the whole two sides of the family make him admit.
If she wants to go a step further, she could probably talk to her mother in law or father in law if they are still alive and have them talk and ask the husband, not inviting the whole 2 sides of the family like a mob action, even when the authenticity of the accusation is yet to be established.

nick50:
..people likeu re the problem of this country

People like you are the reason why abortion should be made legal. Aborting you would've saved your parents from this mess they call a child.

This is a weird angle.

Just because he (allegedly) had sex with a 19 year old woman does not mean that he will have sex with his own children.

bjbjbj:
You married a stupid man and claim that people respect him. Tell your husband to take responsibility for his actions and you are still with your husband I pity you. Please start talking to your kids before DADDY start having sex with them oo.

PapaAdanna:
What again do you wanna believe, are you saying that the girl didn't know who was removing her pants and doing the do.


...your husband volunteered to take her to the hospital?

Well, a 19 year old is still kind of clueless about certain things, especially if they do not get good sex education

If she went along with it, she wast smart but the husband still deserves the lion's share of the blame

This is another good point agneseze.

Such a scenario is quite common in African movies: Nigerian, Togolese, Congolese, etc.

I've also heard girls in those street interviews reason this way.

Be careful o.

Born2Breed:
What makes you think the girl is not lying?

Assuming its true,what makes you think this was not planned from the onset by the girl mother?

You made a mistake by bringing a full grown girl into your home,the day you did was the very day you brought in a second wife.

No matter what,you must stand by your husband,you need each other now than ever cos if its true,what has happened has happened,start making plans for the girl and her baby outside your home.

Pearl05:



The man of course he is the one that needs to clear his name. Abi you want buhari to pay?


But that will mean the girl keeping the baby.

Hahaha...so if your brother is accused of getting a girl (let's say one of his female friends) preggy, he should pay for the DNA test? You people are unbelievable.

In case you don't know, the burden of proof rests on the one who alleges.

AgreatMan:


Agneseze

If you follow this advice, you will crumble your marriage with your own hands. It doesn't mean it is a faulty advise, you just need to determine if you want to settle this or your want to throw blames.

D first person to blame is the OP. You brought a matured female into your own home because u couldn't take your of your home yourself.

A man and a woman are wired differently. Firstly, a man is attracted by what they see n u brought him something to see. Secondly, a man might vow never to touch a woman, but if the woman touches him...then... Since she wasn't raped, she could have initiated it.

Your husband did it but you cannot allow this ruin your marriage. You must also not allow him lose face. That child is yours but you must ensure it never happens again, n your ability to ensure this doesn't happen depends on d level of influence you have on him.

This is the most important thing to them. Not even the marriage, because if they care about the marriage- they won't do so many things.

Yet women never learn...

midnighter:


Well, a 17 year old is still kind of clueless about certain things, especially if they do not get good sex education

If she went along with it, she wast smart but the husband still deserves the lion's share of the blame

I read about 19 year old, how did you come about 17 year old

This is a trying time for the OP. My honest advice to u is for u to beg God to give u the grace to swallow this hard pill and wisdom so as not to make mistake. Never u leave ur hussy becos of this. In marriage, temptations are abound to happen but the ability for the couple to tackle them makes their love life blossom. I really understand the pain u are going thru right now but pls stand by ur husband becos u are one and not two. Do not allow this to scatter ur marriage pls. Anybody that have not sinned should be the first to cast stone. I am not saying that what ur hussy did was right but the bitter truth is that the deed has been done. Ask ur husband to tell u the truth that u are willing to forgive and stand by his side no matter what. I am sure that he will tell u the truth if u promised to be by his side becos the man is afraid that u will leave him if he tells the truth. Concerning ur niece, I advise that u allow her give birth to the child. Then do paternity test to confirm if the child is actually ur hussy 's. If the child is his, plead with the girl and her family to allow u take care of the child and promised that u will be a good mum to the child. Again, this is not easy at all becos as a human being, the child will always remind u how ur hussy cheated on u but u have to beg Ğod to give u grace to overcome it which I am sure He will give u. Pls do not advice ur niece to do abortion. Abortion is murder and a grievious sin against God. Pls do not listen to those advising u for ur niece to do abortion . God forbid , if she has complications and die in the process. The guilt will never leave until u live the palnet earth. Take heart my dear, I believe u will come out of this. MAY GOD BE WITH U AND UR FAMILY AT THIS TRYING TIME, AMEN.

PapaAdanna:


I read about 19 year old, how did you come about 17 year old

He read the story two years ago

[s]

chocolatelady:
This is a trying time for the OP. My honest advice to u is for u to beg God to give u the grace to swallow this hard pill and wisdom so as not to make mistake. Never u leave ur hussy becos of this. In marriage, temptations are abound to happen but the ability for the couple to tackle them makes their love life blossom. I really understand the pain u are going thru right now but pls stand by ur husband becos u are one and not two. Do not allow this to scatter ur marriage pls. Anybody that have not sinned should be the first to cast stone. I am not saying that what ur hussy did was right but the bitter truth is that the deed has been done. Ask ur husband to tell u the truth that u are willing to forgive and stand by his side no matter what. I am sure that he will tell u the truth if u promised to be by his side becos the man is afraid that u will leave him if he tells the truth. Concerning ur niece, I advise that u allow her give birth to the child. Then do paternity test to confirm if the child is actually ur hussy 's. If the child is his, plead with the girl and her family to allow u take care of the child and promised that u will be a good mum to the child. Again, this is not easy at all becos as a human being, the child will always remind u how ur hussy cheated on u but u have to beg Ğod to give u grace to overcome it which I am sure He will give u. Pls do not advice ur niece to do abortion. Abortion is murder and a grievious sin against God. Pls do not listen to those advising u for ur niece to do abortion . God forbid , if she has complications and die in the process. The guilt will never leave until u live the palnet earth. Take heart my dear, I believe u will come out of this. MAY GOD BE WITH U AND UR FAMILY AT THIS TRYING TIME, AMEN.

[/s]

Go and sit down

nkwuocha1:


It's not foolish my friend!Call a meeting of every parties involved.A teenager is pregnant and the culprit is within.If it was your daughter what would you do?Those who are meant to be responsible,on whose care you handed her over is telling you strange stories?

After calling a meeting of every party involved, voila! The problem will be solved.. Talking empty head without brain

PapaAdanna:


I read about 19 year old, how did you come about 17 year old

Sorry 19

BarrElChapo:
You're crazy for this comment and quite immature in your thinking

Like seriously? Let me keep quiet before you call the whole village on my matter

Omojudy:
As painful as this will sound, I will ask the girl what she wants to do, clearly giving her the right over her own body. She is my relative not his and I will support her while watching my husband prayerfully without a quarrel.
If she does keep the pregnancy, I will request her to give us custody of the child and voila we have another child.
Whatever she decides, I will stand by it. Anything other than him and her continuing their affair.
Yes, I will also have the baby’s DNA tested when born if we have to accept the liability.
Life is not that hard, it’s betraying and hurtful but we will always take the right decisions putting emotions aside.

Is this supposed to make her happy?


OP, the ball is in your court, if you confirm that your husband truly impregnated your niece you can decide to separate from him for your peace of mind

It is very possible. A man that can not control his sexual urge to his own niece in law, which I’m sure he witnessed her upbringing from a very young age, can sleep with his child. You would be so surprised how many fathers sexually molest their children, it’s absolutely disgusting.

cooooooks:
This is a weird angle.

Just because he (allegedly) had sex with a 19 year old woman does not mean that he will have sex with his own children.

Jisos! I'm confused too. What if its true? Chai! What will you do? Chai! Not your niece nau! Chai!

Ask you husband to produce Doctor's report on the girl's ill health. If he is unable to produce it, then he is responsible, period.

alphaNomega:


Hahaha...so if your brother is accused of getting a girl (let's say one of his female friends) preggy, he should pay for the DNA test? You people are unbelievable.

In case you don't know, the burden of proof rests on the one who alleges.

There is no how she will accuse the man if the man didn't fall his hands by planting in her garden even once. Why didn't she call someone else like neighbour?

That man committed the offense of sleeping with her but the pregnancy might even belong to another so he should pay for the DNA test.

AgreatMan:


Agneseze

If you follow this advice, you will crumble your marriage with your own hands. It doesn't mean it is a faulty advise, you just need to determine if you want to settle this or your want to throw blames.

D first person to blame is the OP. You brought a matured female into your own home because u couldn't take your of your home yourself.

A man and a woman are wired differently. Firstly, a man is attracted by what they see n u brought him something to see. Secondly, a man might vow never to touch a woman, but if the woman touches him...then... Since she wasn't raped, she could have initiated it.

Your husband did it but you cannot allow this ruin your marriage. You must also not allow him lose face. That child is yours but you must ensure it never happens again, n your ability to ensure this doesn't happen depends on d level of influence you have on him.

There is no simple solution, but the man is the one to blame. He is the grown pillar of community here. The girl is a small girl. The man may even have disvirgined her.

As they say you pick your choices but not the consequences.

Omojudy:
As painful as this will sound, I will ask the girl what she wants to do, clearly giving her the right over her own body. She is my relative not his and I will support her while watching my husband prayerfully without a quarrel.
If she does keep the pregnancy, I will request her to give us custody of the child and voila we have another child.
Whatever she decides, I will stand by it. Anything other than him and her continuing their affair.
Yes, I will also have the baby’s DNA tested when born if we have to accept the liability.
Life is not that hard, it’s betraying and hurtful but we will always take the right decisions putting emotions aside.

You think
1) a woman wants a constant reminder of her husbands indiscretion in her face for the next 20 years?
2) a woman wants to go through the wahala of raising a child from baby to toddler to kid to tween? You think raising kids is easy?
3) a woman wants to directly interact with her new Co wife?

The deed has been done already. What you need now is fast solution and wisdom on what to do.

Leaving your marriage is NOT an option here. Because you will certainly regret the consequence later. Since she is still young and also the pregnancy, I will advise you take her to a very good Doctor or Nurse for abortion to save her and that baby from epileptic future.
Its always easy NOW to say I will take care of the baby or I will do this and I will do that.....
Don't forget you already have four kids.

Things can change later my dear.

Take that option NOW regardless..


"A stitch in time saves time.....

Wisdom is profitable to direct....

If you asked me who to believe, then believe me that you husband is responsible for the pregnancy.

He only went to the hospital with her out of curiosity to confirm if truly she is pregnant after she told him about her missing period.

And she couldn't have told him about the missing period , if he has not been sleeping with her.

Pls Pay more attention to the girl story than ur husband deceit.

Chiefochiefo:
Don't believe all these small small girls o, if not you'll have issues with ur marriage. Her mission maybe coming to eat that tin you're proud of or just to scatter ur home. Be wise woman! Believe ur husband, support ur husband even if it's true so far ur husband keeps denying it. Don't blame us. [This d reason my wife don't accept long visit from a woman, even her sisters . Though sometimes am not too happy with that. It looks she don't trust me. But the mata be say anything can still happen. Handle this matter with wisdom woman.

Hope you won't rape your daughter one day. Maybe your wife should consider sending her away for safety too

Hi, I just joined nairaland. Am hoping to meet amazing people on this forum. Am all out for friendship from both sexes.

Arrested for what? Adultery? That is not a crime. The girl is 19 so it's not statutory take either.

Lexusgs430:


Get him arrested....... If you have daughters, he might turn to them soonest........

The public defender would get the truth out.........

olowo1995:


She can be pregnant which happen might be the truth and the hobby may not be responsible for it. So the only way to confirm is DNA after delivery which is if she planned to keep the pregnancy

If the husband went to the doctor with her and they confirmed she was pregnant BUT HE LIED ABOUT IT.... then it's obvious he is guilty of having sex with her, even if he ain't the father.