Kapeter:
you lied. Marriage isn't hard, Africans made it so with their barbaric reasoning. Many women don't want to leave abusive marriage because the society would look down on them, the youths don't wanna go into marriage not because they can't take care of themselves and their respective wives buh because they can't at the same time take care of extended families of their partners.

Same girls many guys are with right now can easily be married off by them buh they can't not because they can't feed them but because what tradition would request them to bring before they can officially hand over same girls to them, because extended family will never stop coming and then because many of these girls also only want the marriage because they are tired of fending for themselves.

Go to many western word and see how easy marriage is really is.

lilwetdick:


Every where in the word, society force you to marry

Most men do not want to marry but thanks to pressure from women.

Kapeter:
you lied. Marriage isn't hard, Africans made it so with their barbaric reasoning. Many women don't want to leave abusive marriage because the society would look down on them, the youths don't wanna go into marriage not because they can't take care of themselves and their respective wives buh because they can't at the same time take care of extended families of their partners.

Same girls many guys are with right now can easily be married off by them buh they can't not because they can't feed them but because what tradition would request them to bring before they can officially hand over same girls to them, because extended family will never stop coming and then because many of these girls also only want the marriage because they are tired of fending for themselves.

Go to many western word and see how easy marriage is really is.

Xisnin:

You are probably still a kid.
Nobody forces men to marry.
Some men don't want to marry and they don't.

Offpoint:
Being single is one privileged I can't trade for a billion naira, marriage is equivalent to life imprisonment.


The fear of someone standing at the door demanding to know where I was coming from by 11pm scare the shít outta me.

lilwetdick:


The western culture of Marriage that you praise so much has lead to the death of many men, homelessness of men, inability for them to see their children, false allegations, their properties been taken away from them and lot more.

And who told you divorce in the western world is easy, it always comes with its consequences whether financially, mentally and emotionally for the couple and their children

marriage isnt easy any where, it is hard work, if you dont want it, you dont do it, the only reason women go to marriage is because of stability, thinking that when they marry their financial situation will be solved.

Most men on the otherside, do not want to go into marriage but through the manipulation of women it works out, when her expectation and idealisation doesnt work out, she wants to walk out but that is impossible because of the investment she has invested in the marriage, she has kids that need care, need to go to school, she cant just divorce when her herself does not have any income to survive on her own talkless of taking care of her kids.

so if you think divorce is easy get into one and see if you can divorce after enough investment. you can separate but to divorce is hard.

marriage isnt simple anywhere in this world, waking up to the same person everyday is hard whether in Africa or in Europe.

lilwetdick:


How is African Tradition bleeped up?

so in western world, boys dont fear commitment and marriage?

0taPiaPia:

U aren't ready to be responsible

lilwetdick:


you are the kid.

There is always pressure for men to marry from family members and society , when a man does not want to marry at his prime, society looks at him as he is not responsible

and also most women will force the man in their life to get marry to them, why is there always the "the talk"

if you have been in a relationship before, you will understand the "the talk"

"the talk" is the speech from women, asking about where the relationship is leading to.

Offpoint:
Being single is one privileged I can't trade for a billion naira, marriage is equivalent to life imprisonment.


The fear of someone standing at the door demanding to know where I was coming from by 11pm scare the shít outta me.

edward1984:


I have a polish friend who married with just 20€,, they went to the towns hall, registration fee was 100 zloty which is 20€,, the parents of both couples only and that was that,, and they both are in their early 20s,,, simple as that

skywalker240:

abeg e hard.

go marry ibo girl first.

Skmoda:

It's because Igbo people used to demand alot for bride price and so on ....

Kapeter:
and what are Africans ever good for? Most especially the ones stucked here in the continent. Did you even see the humiliation the African leaders suffered at the just concluded UNGA? The rest of the world left immideately African leaders started giving their speech. Why? Because they know Africans have nothing to offer.

omoharry:
That is why the world is diverse with thier unique way of doing things. The way of the polish people cannot be the same in places like India or China or other countries that have their peculiar way of marriage and tradition..

You cannot use another country and their way of life and style of marriage as a yardstick to measure your own continent..it shows you do not have an identity. You are always quick to put down your own because it is convenient for you to accept their style of living, then why don't you take every package that comes with marriages in the western world where the woman rules and the laws favors her if she does not want the marriage anymore. You think sey na here wey you be master of the house?where you can do and undo and society will tell your wife to bear your nonsense and pray for her husband? whilst she continue to be the good wife of keeping the home front running as you gallivant around with your guys around town and a couple of side chicks...

Applying the western culture means you have to be involve with the domestic affairs of the home 50/50..including helping out with the work around the house as well as the children, cleaning them up caring for then as at when due, both of you will be sharing roles and there wont be " I am the man of the house" both of you will share income 50/50 and no body is the head of the house.

You dare misbehave in anyway with another woman or any mistake of unfaithfulness then you are a goner..you will not only loose all your properties, you will lose full custody of your children ,you will be allowed visitation right(that is if she really mean to deal with you)

So marriages everywhere has their pros and cons..it now depend on you to know which one you can cope with. You can travel and marry a foreign woman with just 20 dollas /pound if you so wish..it is your life and we should choose what will make us happy.
Abeg nor dey rubbish our culture ooo..! I am sure that even within Nigeria we have marital rite that are very cheap and less fun fare..it varies from ethnic group to group and families to families

skywalker240:

Oga I Didn't compared it with the west,


am only trying to point out reasons young men gets frustrated with marraige in Africa, thats why alot of young guys lose the girl they love because they cant afford that colossal list and the baggages that comes with it (when her family does any meeting the man would be billed some money, honestly that can be a burden thats even 1 of the many examples dont get me started on her siblings and parents), most girls end up with who is ready finance wise and not with who they wish to settle with.

why in Africa do you keep hearing that phrase,


NA WHO DON CHOP BELLEFULL DE MARRY ?

lets call a spade what it is.

Xisnin:


Shed your inferiority complex.

Mariage is way harder in the western world, that is why it is gradually dying
and their divorce rate ranges from 40 to 70%.

The problem I have with many of you JJCs is that you live your lives inside Hollywood or
choose to believe in myth as opposed to reality.

Even many western men have started going to Asian countries to find traditional women
to marry because they can't face the prospect of a "hard" marriage.

I am not the one to tell people how to live their life but just because you don't measure up
to certain societal standards doesn't give the right to spread lies about it.

JONNYSPUTE:
.. You want me to be answering many many questions. Just like I was home all through on Tuesday, they want to finish me with questions.But to be honest, mothers dey try.

skywalker240:

Oga I Didn't compared it with the west,


am only trying to point out reasons young men gets frustrated with marraige in Africa, thats why alot of young guys lose the girl they love because they cant afford that colossal list and the baggages that comes with it (when her family does any meeting the man would be billed some money, honestly that can be a burden thats even 1 of the many examples dont get me started on her siblings and parents), most girls end up with who is ready finance wise and not with who they wish to settle with.

why in Africa do you keep hearing that phrase,


NA WHO DON CHOP BELLEFULL DE MARRY ?

lets call a spade what it is.

Ikem11:
Lol op this more reason I married a white lady. For past 6 years I been with her not even a day I paid for her mama or papa things... Na them they join come give me sef as someone married to their daughter.

African mentality is so bad. My wedding was paid by my father in-law cos am not allowed to since am getting married to his daughter (not like I can't afford it they know very well I can)

khiaa:


Be fair and take care of the kids and let her have fun with her friends?

condemn:


Shutup, married women don't stay out late at night. Over sabi nai go make you remain single for life.

Originalsly:
[qumoote author=Kapeter post=82675837]

I don't know what the problem with African is though buh it seems it's not God that created others that also create us sha cuz in everything we are totally different and it's obvious.



Who should we be like? That is our Culture... do the Chinese do the same as the Americans? ...do the Indians do the same as the Latinos? Isn't it the same God that created them all?... and yet you don't see them as difficult... but we are... difficult and different. Again... who should we like?

With this your reasoning and conclusions you don't even know you are supporting what you are condemning. ... too young to marry... not mature enough. You want to be free to marry at 18...like the Americans and others.... they were already living on there own....earning for themselves... were you?...are you? As difficult as they may be....what is the divorce rate compared to the ehmmm.... easy marriage countries?

Originalsly:
[qumoote author=Kapeter post=82675837]

I don't know what the problem with African is though buh it seems it's not God that created others that also create us sha cuz in everything we are totally different and it's obvious.



Who should we be like? That is our Culture... do the Chinese do the same as the Americans? ...do the Indians do the same as the Latinos? Isn't it the same God that created them all?... and yet you don't see them as difficult... but we are... difficult and different. Again... who should we like?

With this your reasoning and conclusions you don't even know you are supporting what you are condemning. ... too young to marry... not mature enough. You want to be free to marry at 18...like the Americans and others.... they were already living on there own....earning for themselves... were you?...are you? As difficult as they may be....what is the divorce rate compared to the ehmmm.... easy marriage countries?

Pettyprincess:
This is one of the things i dnt like about us,many guys are in debt after their lavish wedding just to impress family nd friends.
What i know is that on my wedding day it will be very simple with just family nd close friends,i will rather use the money to establish myself nd hubby.

MoonWater:
Marriage isn't actually hard... It's the couple that will decide if they want it hard or sensible.
If you choose a simple wedding no one will arrest you.
If you choose to break the bank and add huge loan to it. Pray hunger doesn't strangle you