I enjoyed every bit of your write up.

talented writer.

This is really nice, I look forward to reading more.
Also, have a wonderful time there!

Brings camp memories back to life

You are doing a great job my dear...

But I hope you are leaving North after camp?

I wish you all the best.

Jones4190:
A lecturer walked into a class room and told all the students that there will be an emergency test. She went straight to the chalk board and wrote the instructions as follows:
1. Time is 15mins
2. No copying
3. No cancellation of answers
4. Once it's time walk away from your desk.
She told the students to get ready and that it will be a simple two
question test.
Question 1. List four of your favorite foods and immediately students started writing.
The Boys were writing Eba, pounded yam,rice, beans, fufu etc...
While the girls were busy writing
Chicken, Chasseur, lasagna, sushi, pizza, shawarma, burger, red velvet Cake, Vanilla ice cream etc.
All the ladies were very happy until they saw the final question which is question 2.
Question 2 says: Explain how to prepare four of your favourite meals as listed in question 1.
See girls and cancellation. See wahala, the girls began to cancel all their first answer and started
changing it to: Yam, beans, white rice,, egg, tea, akamu, indomie, dodo, soaking garri, oil rice etc,.
One of the girls even wrote hot water as her favorite food.
You see yourself?
Let's laugh a little it's a great day.

Abeg I beg you, stop derailing threads with not so funny jokes and stories... The joke section is there for you to post such.
Stop derailing threads because you're looking for likes.

realwiz1:
What kind of rubbish is this

I'm actually enjoying it

Here's what to expect

To serve this bastard country called Nigeria is not by force.

Nicely written, op. Never mind the juvenile comments.

Your write up is highly informative and sprinkled with the right amount of humor to make for a good read.

2016 batch B stream 1, i was also posted to Borno state but we had the orientation at Bauchi state in Alhaji Hassan college, God! the journey of travelling from PH to Bauchi is a story for another day because i have never experienced such horror before, i and my fellow travellers had to sleep @ the park. Although the park is very safe (Cross Country Motor Park @Abuja). But the good thing was that i met a girl in the park too, her vehicle left from Lagos she was also posted to Borno but been that
she schooled @ India she was a JJC we became friends.To cut the long story short, we were given redeployment form and luckily i was redeployed to Delta State while my friend was redeployed to Rivers State. And to God be the glory i got back to PH by past 2:am.

It obvious u didn't serve,
bad belle

realwiz1:
What kind of rubbish is this

BigCabal:
NYSC Diary Day 3: In Camp, You Meet People From Different Worlds

2:41 AM
Strange things are happening, good things are happening.

A flurry of movement wakes me. Today is the swearing in. I tap O., but he does not stir. I go alone to fetch my bath water. When I return, I go to bed again, but it’s hard to sleep. I drift in and out until I finally stand up some minutes before 5 am.


And then it begins.

A voice in the room says he has something to tell us. He says we should hear him out. Everyone is busy with preparation, but ears are cocked. And the voice gives his message: we should pray. Muslims in the room should please not take offence.

He is from NCCF, he says, and I think, “Wait, are NCCF people now in our room?”

NCCF is Nigerian Christian Corpers Fellow by the way.

He begins with a song of worship. We sing, cold mouths opening up heavily, slowly. He persists. Tells us to shout Halleluyah. Prayer is important, do we know? Giving thanks to God. We have not had any case of theft, shouldn’t we give thanks?

In the middle of this, I head to the bathroom so I can get a spot before it becomes crowded. I am wrong. In the end, I take my bath in a doorless bathroom, so much for keeping myself.

7:57 AM
Parade begins about this time. This is after morning devotion where brethren from fellowship bodies remind us of our duties to God, after the morning mediation titled Obedience. Parade today is a little humorous, never mind that today is the swearing in, that monumental event that will transition us from prospective corps members to bonafide corps members. Humorous, in that the new intakes keep messing up the commands, being unused to the actions accompanying them.



“Stand attention!” and some people still have their hands by their sides rather than the back.

We are warned: this event will have dignitaries in attendance, we better not misbehave. Our conduct will determine the overall tone of the camp experience, either good or bad.

We are told how to dress: in our khakis, jungle boots, crested vest, everything, sans the jacket. No water bottles, no sunglasses, no waist pouches. Come the way you are.

We go over the commands again, march of the flag parade, signing of the oath form, salute of the officials.

Hours later, we are dismissed for breakfast, and told to go prepare ahead for the swearing in.


10:55 AM
We are back on the parade ground for the official swearing in. We are all clad in khakis. My khaki smells like engine oil, but I am afraid to speak out. Finally I do, and B. confirms it. It’s the printing ink.

Let’s be honest, some people deserve tiri gbosas. The sun is hot enough, but some ladies are in full make-up and faux eyelashes. I’m pretty sure that by the end of the parade, such an affair will end in tears. All that makeup, all that sun. One thing must give way for another.



The parade is as you might expect: hot sun cooking us all, dignitaries ably represented by someone else. But there is more: people are fainting. It is expected, but it quickly goes beyond the expected and soon, Red Cross officials begin to dart across the camp to pick up people. It is a believable fainting, yet also so highly staged. At least that one I am sure of. A guy in the queue next to mine is tapping his knee and laughing, laughing, laughing. Two minutes later, Bros is on the ground yelling muscle pull.

One of the members of the flag party faints on her way to sign the oath form with the Chief Judge. Entertainment is suspended because of the extreme weather. We become rowdy, mimic the Chief Judge’s pronunciations as we recite the oath after him. We are carefree, and there is hardly anything the soldiers can do to us but look on in horror.

11:46 AM
I return to bed to get some sleep. I am extremely exhausted. Since I got here, I sometimes catch my dozing on the parade grond. I fall into bed with relief and it welcomes me home.


2:50 PM
I slowly return to my default settings after sleep loosens me up. For a few minutes, I stare at people like I’m not sure what I am doing amongst these people. F. keeps asking if I’m alright.

Lunch is Jollof rice and boiled beef. The Jollof tastes like premature Jollof: concoction. And I think it still needs a tiny pinch of salt, but it tastes nice. And I devour it with gratitude.


4:15 PM
This may or may not be the beginning of good things, but I don’t know it yet.

We return to the parade ground where we are told that we are to abide strictly to the rules, now that we are bonafide corps members. The camp commandant addresses us. “A lady was caught wearing bum shorts to Mammy Market yesterday night, where do you think you are?! If we get hold of you, you will be dealt with severely. Discipline is needed!”

In other words, we must always be dressed in whites. Rubber slippers will be confiscated. Phones must be silenced or switched off on the parade ground or it will be seized and returned when the camp ends. Do not smoke elsewhere but the smoking corner at Mammy market. Ladies, do not carry hairstyles that will be too much for you to handle. Do not wear shades unless they are recommended, and you must provide a paper to this end.

B. is a fellow platoon member, but so far, we have a connection. I know what you are thinking, but I have not found love yet. B. has a positive energy, one I really like. Since we line up according to platoons, I often find myself before or behind her. And we often talk about random things. But this evening, we roll different. I tell her about the

“Is Ashimolowo a bad bitch?”tweet I found once on Twitter, and that provokes a bout of laughter. Soon, everyone is a bad bitch. The soldier with his new fancy hat. Me when I decide to talk in defiance of orders. A fellow corps member in sunshades. Bad bitches everywhere.

But the most interesting part comes when a fellow platoon member is being bullied and called Bob (meaning Bobrisky) in a condescending manner. I know how this feels, and this manner of toxicity irks us to no end. We decide to fight for him/talk to him at the end of everything.

His name is G., and contrary to what we think, he is actually tough and able to defend himself. From him, I learn (again) that not obviously reacting to whatever people do to you will show them that you’re not bothered. It is different from taking offence which will show them that they are definitely hitting home with you.


And believe me, G. is full of life, full of light. He is the life of the party. And I like this kind of energy instantly. The field empties and we’re all still talking, happy, getting to know eachother. B, the girl I may or may not have a crush on wants me to meet her friend O. who is also my friend and bunk person. O. introduces us to R., and we introduce him to G. The atmosphere is full of all round love and we’re all kumbaya-ing when I realise that someone, we’re all connected and NYSC is the thing that brings that connection to life.

I remember that B. finished from Babcock. G., from Kwara State University. Me, from University of Ilorin. And I realise how true it is that NYSC is a place to meet different people from different schools and different worlds.

Bros na your time, enjoy why it last. in maritime academy, we do this almost everyday for every semester. after one year, you're free. d drilling reduce. it changed notice, take care

BigCabal
Enjoyable diary, I hope you keep us updated for the next few weeks.

Sp Medical personnel are allowed to skip parade?

What department in Unilorin?

Hmmmm

Mani camp is the best in nigeria, you would ve had a good time had u campd in mani camp built by yardua in katsina metropolis.

,

Awwwwwwwwww it was more like the story shouldn't end,can't wait to have such experiences, meeting new people has always been my thing

Oh man!!! Is that Papi still a soldier dere? Papi was hitting on fine girl, he even kept calling after my posting who no like fine girl, Such a friendly man!

And there is this female soldiers who knew me for always not involving in any activity
She was fit and shortest amongst them. She will come into the room screening my name

Man I totally missed Katsina camp but that cold I don't miss at all!

Seeing the parade ground just reminded me of how I always seat with the sick people at the Pavilion

GeoAfrikana:
My ten kobo advise for every PCM:


Avoid private schools at all cost. They have no benefit to your life. Their 5k has negligible impact on your finance. But they'll want to use you to the fullest. Once you accept it, no going back. That 5k is a scam. And worse is that there's almost no useful experience that you'll gain from private schools.

If you need money, go to companies.

If you can't find a company that's willing to pay handsomely then find a (mini) company that will offer you experience (even if they won't pay you a dime), it's worth it.

The last option is to find a government secondary school where you'll teach for only few periods per week. This will give you time to build/improve your business and skills.

One year in a man's life no be beans. Use it wisely and don't let 5k make you waste one year of your life on building another man's empire.

@bolded
You nailed it �.
Well said.
I served in a public secondary school during my service year.

My time table was very flexible (40 minutes everyday).
In fact, I had lots of free time to engage myself in other activities (personal stuffs and NYSC)

That freedom, I believe, gave me the time I needed to use my skill (graphics, software and web design) to make extra cash for myself.


@BigCabal, job well-done.

[Nice one , you are very good in writing

Any corper in Borno I'll buy you some bottles tomorrow at Army Officer Mess (Wolf)

Jesus mehn! I gotta hand it to you OP, you killed it. Good real life experience with lots of humour embedded. I just can't stop laughing . I literally rolled on the floor with laughter. You are a gifted writer with a lovely way of putting words together.

Sincerely, you made my day with this. I can't believe something finally made me laugh after a disappointing and anger-filled day. Keep it up, mate

God knows I would so evade this whole thing in my time

Lovely,

So many people will derail this thread with their unnecessary opinion,suggestions and noise...
Please OP don't lose focus, following keenly and nice write up.

Thank you BigCabal..

As someone that will be serving soon..
I enjoyed every bit of your writing..

And really looking forward to your updates.

Thanks Gee.

kereman1:
Chie, been there done that, was poste to Borno camped @ kastina,

The orientation camp was in a deplorable state.
Their food there na kasted, they don't even consider ppl from diff ends of the country, there is always tuwo on the menu for each day, I stated having d feeling that it was don on purpose becos, corpers won't collect and dey have enof to go round for themselves (norther staffs), and more customers for mami traders.
Toilet is so bad, na shortput we dey throw.


Will be keeping u guys updated.

And in contrast the real Katsina camp at Mani Road is the best in the country.
They should have combined you guys there.

Damn, you have a great diary here
Nice updates I enjoyed it (bookmark)

O.P thank you very much..

am a fresher and will be going for my services next year..

i have learnt alot from you except the borno state part cux God knows i wont consider that shit..