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Re: Share Your Frightening But Funny Stories by TheFacelessMan: 10:34pm On Nov 12, 2019
post=77634083:
shocked

I remember vividly this happened to me one cold September night in Jalingo, Taraba.


I was drunk and driving my old Volkswagen Passat 1997 model when i saw this young lady by the side of the road at midnight.



hrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr..... i screeched to a halt, i must have been doing 100km/hr and reversed to pick her up.

She was the most shapely lady my 30 year old eyes had EVER SEEN. My p3nis agreed silently in my trousers to that assessment


Cut long story short, i gave her a lift and while in the car, i managed to convince her to take a drink at my place before going home...

I went inside to pee and next thing i saw, this big breasted, big bakassied babe was lying spread-eagle on my bed shocked

Blood rushed into my head and other parts too. My brain screamed "NOOO!!!, ILLOGICAL" while

my diick disagreed saying " YES, SEXUAL"

Frozen to a spot, i happened to glance at my bedside mirror and i saw a rather hairy wolf-like beast lying on my bed shocked shocked shocked

I looked at the mirror....looked at her...repeated same and by the 3rd cycle, the wolf in the mirror smiled hungrily at me, licking its lips


I looked at her on the bed and my erection had long departed. She stared deep into my eyes.

That look of awareness, OF KNOWING undecided and began to stand up,....




To be continued shocked shocked shocked


Culled from "The Memoirs of The Faceless Man" cool

31 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Share Your Frightening But Funny Stories by Charmish(f): 10:35pm On Nov 12, 2019
The day I sleepwalk

1 Like

Re: Share Your Frightening But Funny Stories by Nobody: 10:35pm On Nov 12, 2019
嘿哈哈vav 哈va 哈va 哈吧va

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: Share Your Frightening But Funny Stories by Hotzone(m): 10:36pm On Nov 12, 2019
My only bad dream is any obstacle claiming to prevent me from changing my RX 350 2016 to GX470 2020

5 Likes

Re: Share Your Frightening But Funny Stories by VICTORCIZA(m): 10:38pm On Nov 12, 2019
SimDan95:
I've got a lot of em, but mine was real it happened wen my mum died year 2009 I was in ss1 then, the trauma affected my a lot and I ended up been sick most times.

so I would be at home alone in my sick bed at night and my siblings would be outside playing, suddenly kitchen utensils would start dropping on the floor,the pots covers would open and close plates and spoons clatter, water running and so many commotions would be going on in the kitchen. I would be scared shitless outaa my mind then I would hear footsteps walking around the corridor and passages and also incoherent mumblings.

At one point in the night we were all in and suddenly the door to my room I shared with my lil bro just opened as if someone pushed it, mind u this door can't be pushed by wind cos the hinges are kinda old and stiff, I suddenly felt cold and weak with dis feeling that someone was standing right in the room with us and looking at me.

Gosh some crazy moments
anyway FTC
frontpage material mod do ur work
Your condition is holding the poor woman back.Thats why she always came to check up on you.You see mother's love eehh, fear it.

22 Likes 1 Share

Re: Share Your Frightening But Funny Stories by Fountainofyouth(f): 10:39pm On Nov 12, 2019
0KNM:
The day I fractured my d33k shocked

How is that even possible, is her pussy wall hard as rock undecided

2 Likes

Re: Share Your Frightening But Funny Stories by Culin(f): 10:40pm On Nov 12, 2019
Mine happened earlier this year when I was serving in Gombe. I lived in a compound with only two neighbours at the time, my flatmate and another gentleman who occupied one of the other flats.

As a late sleeper most times I stay awake till 1 or 2am pressing phone, it was one of those times I started hearing noises at the back of my room, just beside the window. I removed my earpiece to hear it well. The sound was like that of someone walking (more like tiptoeing) around the window area. It would go on for like 20 seconds and stop for a while then continue again.

The thing was, my other neighbour travelled, my flatmate was in her room sleeping peacefully, the fence was high enough that no one could have jumped in without me hearing a sound, the gate was also locked since 8pm so no one could have sneaked in, so I knew it wasn't a person. Plus what would anyone be looking for outside my window by 3am.

I started panicking when the movements became more like angry footsteps and even knocks on the window.

My fear grew from nothing to a paralyzing one. I almost died. I was too weak I couldn't even feel my whole body, all I knew was I was lying on a bed. The worst thing , that night I did not lock my room door because of the heat. First I thought it was a robber but almost an hour gone and no robbery. Suddenly I remembered someone I knew who died around that time, we were not on talking terms. My mind just said it was the ghost roaming my backyard.

Because my curtains were so light that anybody outside could look in and see my phone's screen light, I locked the phone for a while, then later I took courage and lifted my blankets to cover my whole head, carried my phone to dial my flatmate Aisha, I was hoping if the call wakes her, she'll just come to my room to check on me, but it said number switched off, my spirit just collapsed. Then I dialed my sister, she didn't pick. Sweating profusely out of fear and the blanket, I started praying and crying, begging God for forgiveness and help. I was even talking to the ghost in my mind, I said "abeg no be me kill you o, so please leave me alone, me and you no get any business together, so I command you to leave this compound in the name of Jesus" bla bla.

At this point I'd already dropped tons of messages for my loved ones on whatsapp...you know...incase anything happened.

This sound went on for about an hour, around 4am it became like that of someone running. I couldn't bear it again, so I rolled off my bed, started crawling on the floor towards the door. My stomach was on the floor, like that drill we did in camp that we had to crawl under some barbed wires. I crawled till I got to the door, dragged myself out to the parlour and started crawling again towards my flatmate's room. Usually we left our room doors open cos it was bloody hot and our light had problem for weeks. So I gently put my hand towards the door to open curtain, door was closed. Put it again and pushed harder, locked. I couldn't knock because I didn't want to make any sound and be found out by whatever was outside. Plus that my flatmate ehn, was a deep sleeper, mere knocks can't wake her up before 5:15/5:30am. You'd have to burn down the house.

It was at that moment I started speaking in tongues, i just laid hopeless on the floor crying silently. Battery low sef, it was like I was in a horror movie.
I crawled back to my room without making a sound because there were no curtains in the parlour sef so anything outside could spot me. The plan was to stay still and survive till first light.

But around 5am when I started hearing prayers from the mosque opposite my house, I made up my mind to confront whatever it was and end the torture. As a hard girl that I was, I told myself it was better to die finding out than to die from heart failure on my bed. Plus by that time If I screamed people going for morning prayers would hear me and find a way in. Also my flatmate would be awake in few mins to prepare for work. So I carried my big rechargeable torch and marched towards the window. I tried to look without the light first, didn't see nothing. I Put on the torch and then I saw them! Two biiiiiig bush rats that were eating away my broken sewage pipe and trying to enter it.

�� hei God. Later that morning I charged my phone and uploaded it on my status. My sister called me and I gisted her. They all laughed at me, I laughed too o, but only me knew how terrifying those few hours were.

122 Likes 6 Shares

Re: Share Your Frightening But Funny Stories by Nobody: 10:41pm On Nov 12, 2019
Fountainofyouth:


How is that even possible, is her pussy wall hard as rock undecided
Have you ever had erection and miss the hole while hitting? cheesy cheesy cheesy

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: Share Your Frightening But Funny Stories by FuckAllTheMODs: 10:46pm On Nov 12, 2019
Let me read lies and catch fun with it...

I know most of you are telling lies but continue I'm enjoying it...

9 Likes

Re: Share Your Frightening But Funny Stories by Fountainofyouth(f): 10:46pm On Nov 12, 2019
0KNM:
Have you ever had erection and miss the hole while hitting? cheesy cheesy cheesy

I am female so I don't know, but still, I don't think it's possible, a little bruises yeah, but fracture, nah.

3 Likes

Re: Share Your Frightening But Funny Stories by SweetPreeq(m): 10:47pm On Nov 12, 2019
0KNM:
Have you ever had erection and miss the hole while hitting? cheesy cheesy cheesy

You "laago" abi

Hahaaaa

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: Share Your Frightening But Funny Stories by Ijawwomaninoyo: 10:48pm On Nov 12, 2019
I cause trouble for market.

7 Likes

Re: Share Your Frightening But Funny Stories by Kkings11: 10:49pm On Nov 12, 2019
tonididdy:
@OP road dey to your hilltop house?

You nd your brothers better decide wisely for your next 4yrs in that state otherwise everything will be frightenly not funny anymore.
I tell you say na GRA I dey na so road must dey. tarred road oh my house dey behind Onoja(deputy governor) lodge oh

1 Like

Re: Share Your Frightening But Funny Stories by FuckAllTheMODs: 10:49pm On Nov 12, 2019
Fountainofyouth:


I am female so I don't know, but still, I don't think it's possible, a little bruises yeah, but fracture, nah.


No mind that one, im dey lie.

Him prick na diamond wey the girl pussy be rock?

Even if he miss the spot or target, you will know, it's either the babe or the guy set it back with their hands, simple
Re: Share Your Frightening But Funny Stories by Nobody: 10:49pm On Nov 12, 2019
SweetPreeq:


You "laago" abi

Hahaaaa
That kind thing #YouKnow cheesy cheesy cheesy
Re: Share Your Frightening But Funny Stories by Wolexzy11: 10:50pm On Nov 12, 2019
I remember a day when my girlfriend came to my house and my dick refused to stand.... If you see crying

6 Likes

Re: Share Your Frightening But Funny Stories by Nobody: 10:50pm On Nov 12, 2019
Fountainofyouth:


I am female so I don't know, but still, I don't think it's possible, a little bruises yeah, but fracture, nah.
you won’t understand sis. Many guys fit relate

3 Likes

Re: Share Your Frightening But Funny Stories by SweetPreeq(m): 10:50pm On Nov 12, 2019
0KNM:
That kind thing #YouKnow cheesy cheesy cheesy

The speed wey she go use put am back no be here o
Re: Share Your Frightening But Funny Stories by Nobody: 10:52pm On Nov 12, 2019
SweetPreeq:


The speed wey she go use put am back no be here o
Put what where? Bro, I land hospital o. Dem need cast am shocked shocked

4 Likes

Re: Share Your Frightening But Funny Stories by drlaykay(m): 10:52pm On Nov 12, 2019
Fountainofyouth:


I am female so I don't know, but still, I don't think it's possible, a little bruises yeah, but fracture, nah.
Read about penile fracture... It's 500% possible

6 Likes

Re: Share Your Frightening But Funny Stories by SEGLIZ: 10:54pm On Nov 12, 2019
SimDan95:
I've got a lot of em, but mine was real it happened wen my mum died year 2009 I was in ss1 then, the trauma affected my a lot and I ended up been sick most times.

so I would be at home alone in my sick bed at night and my siblings would be outside playing, suddenly kitchen utensils would start dropping on the floor,the pots covers would open and close plates and spoons clatter, water running and so many commotions would be going on in the kitchen. I would be scared shitless outaa my mind then I would hear footsteps walking around the corridor and passages and also incoherent mumblings.

At one point in the night we were all in and suddenly the door to my room I shared with my lil bro just opened as if someone pushed it, mind u this door can't be pushed by wind cos the hinges are kinda old and stiff, I suddenly felt cold and weak with dis feeling that someone was standing right in the room with us and looking at me.

Gosh some crazy moments
anyway FTC
frontpage material mod do ur work

would you say or confirm that dead loved one do over around with you experience. rather we call it hallucination as a fall out from the relapse mode?

1 Like

Re: Share Your Frightening But Funny Stories by Youngjohnosas: 10:54pm On Nov 12, 2019
I had a nasty experience and for some moments lost my senses.had a girl we just met and she was a next door neighbor to a close friend of mine, I actually paid my friend a visit so I could have a swell time with the lady in question and I invited her over to my friends room,after a while we were carried away by our emotions and next thing she collapsed and she was naked, I had to quickly put on her undies and ran outside to tell my friend, on getting there he was in a company of other friends waiting to know if the trip was successful.

I muttered some words into his ears and he quickly followed me.the other guys saw d look on my face and became suspicious, we quickly left them and dashed inside she was just lying cold and we started pouring water on her and I suddenly turned a prayer warrior. I told my friend I was just talking to her and she collapsed,i denied ever going close to her, it was the used condom on the floor that gave me out,i forgot to remove it.

few minutes later she regained consciousness and that moment I repented and gave my life to Christ. na prison I b see so. local man man is a risk taker he didn't stop there other episodes still gave way till we finally parted ways.

37 Likes 1 Share

Re: Share Your Frightening But Funny Stories by SweetPreeq(m): 10:55pm On Nov 12, 2019
0KNM:
Put what where? Bro, I land hospital o. Dem need cast am shocked shocked

Damn..
U dey hit am with too much force bro

Karma is real

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Share Your Frightening But Funny Stories by kushercain: 10:55pm On Nov 12, 2019
Back then in boarding school, me and my two friends were heading back to the hostel after night reading. One of my friends said he was thirsty and we escorted him to the tap where our Gp tank was, behind our hostel. It was dark and apart from the cricket noise everywhere was quiet. Deep down I was already feeling scared but since we were three in number, I said no shaking. When we reached the tap, I decided to also drink and my other friend also drank after me.
We we're waiting for this guy to close the tap, tap no gree close.
Chaarly close tap na!
He said he was trying to close the tap that it refused to close.
Chaarly you go dey do like woman, commot joor! I no know who send me message. I went to the tap to try and close it. The knob kept on turning but the water didn't stop.
Ah ah what's happening?

That was when we heard the deep bass voice from the tap.
"UNA NO DEY DRINK WATER AGAIN?" grin

O boy shocked come see race that night

63 Likes

Re: Share Your Frightening But Funny Stories by Fountainofyouth(f): 10:57pm On Nov 12, 2019
0KNM:
you won’t understand sis. Many guys fit relate


Alright.
Re: Share Your Frightening But Funny Stories by sLentlover7778(m): 10:58pm On Nov 12, 2019
His mother just put to bed..
Re: Share Your Frightening But Funny Stories by seunmohmoh(f): 10:58pm On Nov 12, 2019
Y'all know how plantain leaves looks like in the dark? That's what scared me when I was younger.

My compound was full of plantain trees and there was a day I was walking into the compound and NEPA did their job, everywhere became dark and the wind was so heavy that I ran inside to avoid the coming rain.

I ran past some trees before I got to the door......The door was unlocked but nobody was home, That was when the lightening started (Lightening scares me a lot) I looked into the dark plantation and thought I saw a figure. That moment i remembered a story I read about witches having their meetings in plantain trees. My heart raced, I couldn't run back outside as I had to pass between the trees before I get to the gate and I couldn't stay where I was or go inside {I was scared of staying alone in the house} .


That moment I told myself "All die na die" I ran through the trees like my life depended on it and stayed with people outside till my parents came back and we went inside.

I remember I couldn't sleep that night because I thought I interrupted the witches meeting and they were watching me angrily.

Good old days grin grin

42 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Share Your Frightening But Funny Stories by jendhorlee(m): 11:04pm On Nov 12, 2019
SimDan95:
I've got a lot of em, but mine was real it happened wen my mum died year 2009 I was in ss1 then, the trauma affected my a lot and I ended up been sick most times.

so I would be at home alone in my sick bed at night and my siblings would be outside playing, suddenly kitchen utensils would start dropping on the floor,the pots covers would open and close plates and spoons clatter, water running and so many commotions would be going on in the kitchen. I would be scared shitless outaa my mind then I would hear footsteps walking around the corridor and passages and also incoherent mumblings.

At one point in the night we were all in and suddenly the door to my room I shared with my lil bro just opened as if someone pushed it, mind u this door can't be pushed by wind cos the hinges are kinda old and stiff, I suddenly felt cold and weak with dis feeling that someone was standing right in the room with us and looking at me.

Gosh some crazy moments
anyway FTC
frontpage material mod do ur work

hmm
gbefun !!!!

1 Like

Re: Share Your Frightening But Funny Stories by BabaIbo: 11:07pm On Nov 12, 2019
mine na the day I went to one night vigil that was organised by the former of Ondo state governor, Olusegun Mimiko in Adegbemile hall when I was in Akure.
I met one pretty dark "shapeful" and busty girl. I walked up to her and started wooing this babe, babe drop o... next thing I signaled my guys that I want to take the babe to the backside of the car packed outside. But it seems that place wasn't comfortable, so we went to a place that look like military parade ground opposite it.
As I was about to start "training", na so one heavy wind (breeze) blow with lightning, e come be like say I see one scary thing.
Naso I discharge with full speed leaving the babe there, since that day I no dey even reason any woman matter for night vigil except maybe na my babe or I know her before

16 Likes 1 Share

Re: Share Your Frightening But Funny Stories by Putin007: 11:07pm On Nov 12, 2019
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Re: Share Your Frightening But Funny Stories by kay29000(m): 11:09pm On Nov 12, 2019
sLentlover7778:
The day I was asked to recite memory verse.. Isaiah 60:1, it was as if ground should open and swallow me, all eyes on me and I was sweating.. i had to switch off the Mic and say anything that comes to my mind..as soon as I'm done I switch on the Mic and say THANK You.


grin cheesy shocked cool grin You're a clown. Lol

3 Likes

Re: Share Your Frightening But Funny Stories by kay29000(m): 11:12pm On Nov 12, 2019
Elder0001:
shocked

The day pocohantas chested on me

"Chested on you?" Please can you explain further. What does that mean?

2 Likes

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