Dear family section members,

Please I need matured advice on an issue that has bothered me for almost two years now.

I got married about two years ago, without the support of my mum (my dad is late). She strongly opposed the wedding without any reasonable justification but I still had my way, thanks to family members (maternal and paternal) and my bride's family who stood firm in the face of the obvious animosity she displayed throughout every stage of the wedding. My mum is a fairly domineering person, and somehow I feel she was greatly offended that the wedding stuff was not her call and she wasn't the one calling all the shots. During the wedding planning, my mum picked issues with almost everyone that supported my marriage and every action that was taken. She made a lot of nasty comments that I never imagined a mother will make to her child. To be fair when it became unbearable for me (because at a point in time, I was getting psychologically depressed with her aggressive quarreling with anyone connected with the wedding), I confronted her and we had a heated argument. After the argument, she became calm, but kept mentioning that I'll regret. I have money and that is why I can talk when she talks.. I took note of this particular comment among all the ones she kept saying because I wondered how my mother who was a major beneficiary of my success will keep saying such.

hmmm, people truly, over the past 18 months, I have gone from a net provider to someone who scrapes to earn a living. I have worked for more employers than I am willing to admit because, each time I joined a company something happens and the company folds up or lays off staff. I have had several instances where offer letters for employment was issued but at the last minute, the HR person just goes cold and rescinds the decision without any explanation. In fact in one instance, I had an insider who informed me that one board member just refused to sign my offer letter without any real reason.

I have tried business too, and at the last step when I am to be awarded the contract, everything just falls apart in a manner that is difficult to explain. I have a failed at so many other things over the past 18 months. I used to be this kind of person with a sterling record at almost everything I did, so failing at so many things was difficult and I lost a lot of my self confidence and even the willingness to explore things because I was becoming deeply embarassed at hw I was failing.

I am not one for superstition, but honestly, I tempted to believe I am impacted by a curse and the timeline and incidences suggest, it's my mum.

Please any one knows how I can go about dealing with curses, I just lost my last job this Dec because company lost a key contract and failed at a bid it was expecting to secure. I enter 2020 unemployed and getting more and more depressed.

As for my mum, we are cool now, although things never went back to the way they were before. Some friends and family members facilitated a "reconciliation" we both said she has forgiven me for my wrong doings and she holds no grudge (in my culture the elders are always right o, so I just played along and asked for forgiveness). She doesnt call to know how my family is except when I visit. She is even a grand mother now, and she doesn't call to know if the child is fine or not. to cut the long stry short, she cares less about the family, even though when we visit, she puts up this appearance of being happy with us.

PS - I dont regret the decision of marrying my wife or our kid, they God's blessings to me in my darkest night. I just want to know if there is a solution to my predicarment, and I also dont want to do anything fetish.

Kneel before her, beg her to forgive you and renounce the curse. If she refuses, implore her people (her parents and siblings) to assist you in begging her. Do not force her oh! After begging her, things will get better for you, even if she does not openly renounce the curse.

Fred2020:
Dear family section members,

Please I need matured advice on an issue that has bothered me for almost two years now.

I got married about two years ago, without the support of my mum (my dad is late). She strongly opposed the wedding without any reasonable justification but I still had my way, thanks to family members (maternal and paternal) and my bride's family who stood firm in the face of the obvious animosity she displayed throughout every stage of the wedding. My mum is a fairly domineering person, and somehow I feel she was greatly offended that the wedding stuff was not her call and she wasn't the one calling all the shots. During the wedding planning, my mum picked issues with almost everyone that supported my marriage and every action that was taken. She made a lot of nasty comments that I never imagined a mother will make to her child. To be fair when it became unbearable for me (because at a point in time, I was getting psychologically depressed with her aggressive quarreling with anyone connected with the wedding), I confronted her and we had a heated argument. After the argument, she became calm, but kept mentioning that I'll regret. I have money and that is why I can talk when she talks.. I took note of this particular comment among all the ones she kept saying because I wondered how my mother who was a major beneficiary of my success will keep saying such.

hmmm, people truly, over the past 18 months, I have gone from a net provider to someone who scrapes to earn a living. I have worked for more employers than I am willing to admit because, each time I joined a company something happens and the company folds up or lays off staff. I have had several instances where offer letters for employment was issued but at the last minute, the HR person just goes cold and rescinds the decision without any explanation. In fact in one instance, I had an insider who informed me that one board member just refused to sign my offer letter without any real reason.

I have tried business too, and at the last step when I am to be awarded the contract, everything just falls apart in a manner that is difficult to explain. I have a failed at so many other things over the past 18 months. I used to be this kind of person with a sterling record at almost everything I did, so failing at so many things was difficult and I lost a lot of my self confidence and even the willingness to explore things because I was becoming deeply embarassed at hw I was failing.

I am not one for superstition, but honestly, I tempted to believe I am impacted by a curse and the timeline and incidences suggest, it's my mum.

Please any one knows how I can go about dealing with curses, I just lost my last job this Dec because company lost a key contract and failed at a bid it was expecting to secure. I enter 2020 unemployed and getting more and more depressed.

As for my mum, we are cool now, although things never went back to the way they were before. Some friends and family members facilitated a "reconciliation" we both said she has forgiven me for my wrong doings and she holds no grudge (in my culture the elders are always right o, so I just played along and asked for forgiveness). She doesnt call to know how my family is except when I visit. She is even a grand mother now, and she doesn't call to know if the child is fine or not. to cut the long stry short, she cares less about the family, even though when we visit, she puts up this appearance of being happy with us.

PS - I dont regret the decision of marrying my wife or our kid, they God's blessings to me in my darkest night. I just want to know if there is a solution to my predicarment, and I also dont want to do anything fetish.

this case strong, but i strongly believe if not for any spiritual under tone of your mother doing something fishing behind the scene, the cause place on you will not work

immortalcrown:
Kneel before her, beg her to forgive you and renounce the curse. If she refuses, implore her people (her parents and siblings) to assist you in begging her. Do not force her oh! After begging her, things will get better for you, even if she does not openly renounce the curse.

I have done this during the reconciliation bro, infact one of my uncles, who probably didnt know much about my situation asked her to renounce all the bad things she had been saying to me because he had heard her say them in the past.

Honestly, even she isn't better off. Because she isn't really working and she depends on us for support. But since, I am down financially, she is even worse-off, because she depends on us and I was the main person assisting among the children.

Asquare84:


this case strong, but i strongly believe if not for any spiritual under tone of your mother doing something fishing behind the scene, the cause place on you will not work

Do not neglect the power of words spoken by a parent to a child. The mother must not involve 'juju' before the curse can work. For your information, a simple positive word pronounced on you by your parent is more effective than a prayer offered on a mountain in your favour by your religious leader. Also, a curse placed on a person by a religious leader may not work. But a curse placed on the person by his or her parent will work if the person really offended the parent, and the curse can hardly be nullified by a religious leader if the parent is still alive.

Fred2020:


I have done this during the reconciliation bro, infact one of my uncles, who probably didnt know much about my situation asked her to renounce all the bad things she had been saying to me because he had heard her say them in the past.

Honestly, even she isn't better off. Because she isn't really working and she depends on us for support. But since, I am down financially, she is even worse-off, because she depends on us and I was the main person assisting among the children.

If you have sincerely apologized to her, things will definitely get better for you soon. Just be patient.

I don't believe it's a curse though. I also don't believe anyone's curses can affect me even a parent's.

Keep a clean hand/heart and no wickedness can ever hold sway over you. It's just what I've come to believe.

Trying times such as the ones you've encountered will test your faith, but they shall pass. It's always darkest before dawn.


If you have doubts, you can conduct a "self-deliverance" with prayers to nullify the "curses".

You have everything in you to speak life into situations. I don't think you need a "special pastor" or go diabolic for that.

Keep at/up your efforts at getting things better for your family and God will bless it in time.

Just my 1kobo

immortalcrown:


If you have sincerely apologized to her, things will definitely get better for you soon. Just be patient.

I'm at my last straw already. I am thinking of selling what I have left (a car and a land) and either opening a trust for my son and committing suicide or tryin another venture (which will most likely fail).

I have rising debts, my house rent is due in some days time and I'm losing my mind.

it might not be a curse from her sef... the world is turning into something else...
might just be a family member or someone else that knows u are having some issues with ur mom that is causing all this trouble..

Oga go and pray... and please while praying ,put ur mom in prayer seriously..

uwa di njo!!!

Fred2020:


I'm at my last straw already. I am thinking of selling what I have left (a car and a land) and either opening a trust for my son and committing suicide or tryin another venture (which will most likely fail).

I have rising debts, my house rent is due in some days time and I'm losing my mind.

You're contemplating suicide? To leave your son fatherless? I understand your frustration but it's a cowardly move.

Fred2020:


I'm at my last straw already. I am thinking of selling what I have left (a car and a land) and either opening a trust for my son and committing suicide or tryin another venture (which will most likely fail).

I have rising debts, my house rent is due in some days time and I'm losing my mind.

Be wise, or get wiser if you are already wise. If your piece of land is not far from your place of residence, sell only your car, use the money to build 'any how' structure on the piece of land as a shelter for you and your family, at least, to prevent moving to village where things will likely get worse between you and your mother. Then, hustle for just feeding. If you still have some money left after building the structure, start a minor (roadside) business for your wife or buy a fairly-used mini bus and become a commercial driver. The downfall of a man is not the end of his life, unless he fails to rise again.

Suicide will only worsen the situation. Your wife and child will suffer. Your mother or whoever is responsible for your frustration will torture your wife and your child. Just as someone already pointed out, your mother may not even be the one responsible for your problem.

immortalcrown:


Be wise, or get wiser if you are already wise. If your piece of land is not far from your place of residence, sell only your car, use the money to build 'any how' structure on the piece of land as a shelter for you and your family, at least, to prevent moving to village where things will likely get worse between you and your mother. Then, hustle for just feeding. If you still have some money left after building the structure, start a minor (roadside) business for your wife or buy a fairly-used mini bus and become a commercial driver. The downfall of a man is not the end of his life, unless he fails to rise again.

Suicide will only worsen the situation. Your wife and child will suffer. Your mother or whoever is responsible for your frustration will torture your wife and your child. Just as someone already pointed out, your mother may not even be the one responsible for your problem.

Thanks, I'll keep pushing things to see how it goes

Go to your mom one on one, go and get your answers. You don't need uncles or aunties, just you and your mom.

She might not have done something extraordinary to you but you should know that the utterances of our parents especially mother is command , and always cone to past.
Don't try to be right with her. Get a nice gift for her , explain your conditions and seek her blessing .
Let her see in your behaviour that you are truly remorseful and submissive.
After these, move closer to God with fasting and prayer . I believe you have a success and achievement story in 2020

immortalcrown:


Do not neglect the power of words spoken by a parent to a child. The mother must not involve 'juju' before the curse can work. For your information, a simple positive word pronounced on you by your parent is more effective than a prayer offered on a mountain in your favour by your religious leader. Also, a curse placed on a person by a religious leader may not work. But a curse placed on the person by his or her parent will work if the person really offended the parent, and the curse can hardly be nullified by a religious leader if the parent is still alive.

read the guy narration of the incident of what happen during the wedding, the mum is just a against the son not to marry the lady without any justification, in that case the mother curse will not work

Asquare84:


read the guy narration of the incident of what happen during the wedding, the mum is just a against the son not to marry the lady without any justification, in that case the mother curse will not work

Forget the influence of westernization and civilization. As an African raised by parents that grew up in Africa, do not go into a marriage that lacks approval and support from your parents and the parents of your desired spouse. Forget the popular saying 'I can fight and die for love'. People usually say 'Let me fight for my love'. But the pain they get from relatives who do not support the marriage withers the love at last.

Parental approval and support for children's choice of life partner is not always a guarantee for a good marriage. But the parental approval and support adds many benefits to marriage, especially in Africa.

Just as parents should not force children to go against the children's wish in marriage, children should as well seek parental approval for marriage.

Your parents may later hate the life partner they approved for you. But I have not seen parents that later loved the life partner they did not consider right for their child. It is only in Nollywood that mother-in-laws later accept the daughter-in-law or son-in-law they initially rejected. It is a different case in real life.

immortalcrown:


Forget the influence of westernization and civilization. As an African raised by parents that grew up in Africa, do not go into a marriage that lacks approval and support from your parents and the parents of your desired spouse. Forget the popular saying 'I can fight and die for love'. People usually say 'Let me fight for my love'. But the pain they get from relatives who do not support the marriage withers the love at last.

Just as parents should not force children to go against the children's wish in marriage, children should as well seek parental approval for marriage.

. Well said,,but love no dey let us think well

Bro, go back to your mum, you and her alone preferably at night and have a deep talk with her. You and your mum still get talk.

See ehen go and meet her for the last time and beg her, but make sure it very early in the morning around 5am. The reason why I said early in the Morning is because by then she never chop anything. Then tell her to place hands on your head and pray for you.

Then go home and do a 7 days prayers (12am-3am) telling God to help you and turn things around for your good.

If your situation doesn't change, come back here and insult me .

Op, with all due respect to you, I can authoritatively tell you that your mom is not a good person. Whatever you're currently experiencing right now, is linked to the altercation you had with your mom.

My bro experienced something similar with my dad. He went as far as stripping and laying curses on him that nothing will work out for him. He feigns repentance now, but the damage has already been done.

Some parents could be a curse than a blessing, and your mom is a typical example. Dig deeper, cos those words from your mom ain't just mere words. There is a spiritual undertone, and either your mom is diabolical or belongs to an evil society.

But one thing is certain, she has a powerful tongue, and things may get worse as long as you're still married to your wife.

I implore you to visit your dad's graveside, and have a long talk with him. He is the only one that can call her to order.

When people talk about not believing in such things, I laugh. They don't seem to understand that they are Africans, and Africans are the most evil people on the continent. Saying you don't believe in such things is like admitting that the devil does not exist.

Bro,

First, don't commit suicide..

That is the plan and if you do, you have let her plans work but she's not the only one after you. Other members of your family too, pay attention to your father's house. She's just their face.

Your kids will suffer a lot - when you are gone. And take it from me that they will not last long before they join your deceased self.

Second: your wife is powerful spiritually than you realise. She is your angel and why you have not died since. Love her more, support and protect her. She and your mum have opposing spirits and she's probably some Ogbanje (emere) but a good one that fights for you. Pls don't joke with her. She has more role to play in your life.

Third: your mum belongs to the dark world (if you know what I mean). It was not what you said that offended her, it is your wife's spirit unsettling her and your star, if you survive this, you will breakthrough with that girl and my intuition tells me that you are destined for greatness in this life.

Fourth: if you are not careful, they will push her to want to divorce you and you may lose one of your kids. If you take the right action, you will win eventually.

Fifth: don't tell many people about yourlife and how your family are doing again. Code your life from now on and let anyone know your plans. Do you have any sibling (if you do, be very careful of them). That your wife and kids are your only family.

Solution:

Your need your father's spirit. Go to his grave and pray.. If you are Yoruba you have to do Sara for him every week; Thursdays are the best. If you are consistent he will come and support you.

You need to pray hard by yourself; do some night vigils and ensure that everyday after you do some charity to beggars. This will take the suicide part out and will ensure that you can survive.

Also, if you can travel outside your state; if in Lagos go to Ogun state, Osun or somewhere else. Don't tell anyone where you are off to, find a strong white garment church stay there for a week or two... Also repeat as much as you can..

It would be a hard fight but you will win in the end

Goodluck

A good man of God can cancel such a curse, because Bible mentioned that a man shall leave his father/mother and cleave to his wife. You did no wrong getting married, your mother was not right to try to stop you from getting married with no reasonable reason. From the look of things, it is clear that you and your wife are not prayerful enough. Increase Your prayers, you also need a genuine man of God who will be there for at all times, it's a pity finding genuine MOGs is almost impossible these days.

Forget the fact that your mom is also suffering the consequences of the hardship that you are experiencing, most times witches or wicked people are not bothered experiencing hardships in such situations, rather they are happy to know they achieved their evil aims. You need spiritual counseling, but be careful and don't involve yourself with juju, white garment churches, etc, they will only complicate your situation.

Fred2020:
Dear family section members,

Please I need matured advice on an issue that has bothered me for almost two years now.

I got married about two years ago, without the support of my mum (my dad is late). She strongly opposed the wedding without any reasonable justification but I still had my way, thanks to family members (maternal and paternal) and my bride's family who stood firm in the face of the obvious animosity she displayed throughout every stage of the wedding. My mum is a fairly domineering person, and somehow I feel she was greatly offended that the wedding stuff was not her call and she wasn't the one calling all the shots. During the wedding planning, my mum picked issues with almost everyone that supported my marriage and every action that was taken. She made a lot of nasty comments that I never imagined a mother will make to her child. To be fair when it became unbearable for me (because at a point in time, I was getting psychologically depressed with her aggressive quarreling with anyone connected with the wedding), I confronted her and we had a heated argument. After the argument, she became calm, but kept mentioning that I'll regret. I have money and that is why I can talk when she talks.. I took note of this particular comment among all the ones she kept saying because I wondered how my mother who was a major beneficiary of my success will keep saying such.

hmmm, people truly, over the past 18 months, I have gone from a net provider to someone who scrapes to earn a living. I have worked for more employers than I am willing to admit because, each time I joined a company something happens and the company folds up or lays off staff. I have had several instances where offer letters for employment was issued but at the last minute, the HR person just goes cold and rescinds the decision without any explanation. In fact in one instance, I had an insider who informed me that one board member just refused to sign my offer letter without any real reason.

I have tried business too, and at the last step when I am to be awarded the contract, everything just falls apart in a manner that is difficult to explain. I have a failed at so many other things over the past 18 months. I used to be this kind of person with a sterling record at almost everything I did, so failing at so many things was difficult and I lost a lot of my self confidence and even the willingness to explore things because I was becoming deeply embarassed at hw I was failing.

I am not one for superstition, but honestly, I tempted to believe I am impacted by a curse and the timeline and incidences suggest, it's my mum.

Please any one knows how I can go about dealing with curses, I just lost my last job this Dec because company lost a key contract and failed at a bid it was expecting to secure. I enter 2020 unemployed and getting more and more depressed.

As for my mum, we are cool now, although things never went back to the way they were before. Some friends and family members facilitated a "reconciliation" we both said she has forgiven me for my wrong doings and she holds no grudge (in my culture the elders are always right o, so I just played along and asked for forgiveness). She doesnt call to know how my family is except when I visit. She is even a grand mother now, and she doesn't call to know if the child is fine or not. to cut the long stry short, she cares less about the family, even though when we visit, she puts up this appearance of being happy with us.

PS - I dont regret the decision of marrying my wife or our kid, they God's blessings to me in my darkest night. I just want to know if there is a solution to my predicarment, and I also dont want to do anything fetish.

This one is tough and am glad you know where its coming from

She is nit happy with you and she us not done with you yet

You are not her target but your wife or the entire marriage

Take out time, visit her, take out for shopping of her choice or if there is any particular thing she needs like washing machine, go with her and get it for her

After that, when you get back home, at midnight, sit her down, cry for her to forgive you and ask her to bless you, also promise her you will never disobey her or neglect her

At this stage she will be speechless but you have to press on

Look, you can't fight your mother that breast feed you, you can't


As for your wife, she must play the fool, "it's better to call a mad man a king and he will allow you to pass than reminding him that he is mad and should give you space to pass"

She will assure you of her words and she will release whatever she has that must have been stumbling your way

Beg ur mum bro



Parents blessings are very important in marriage.


U can use style to ask her why she doesn't want u to marry ur wife in the first place.


May God be with u.



Do not commit suicide it not the best solution

I hope things have changed for the better

My candid advice... If ur mother is the one disturbing ur finance , things will never get better if u dont PRAY.... U must PRAY FERVENTLY. Ask God for help. He is a merciful God and he will answer u.

You should have gone deep investigating why she refused your marriage.