Strongmercy123:
Good evenin everyone. Pls I need a word of wisdom and advice from matured minds here. I’m 28 yrs I will be 29 in 2days.

I feel I’m about to make a life mistake. I have been dating my bf for 10yrs now, yes I was young and independent as at that time, the love was so sweet that we could do anything for each other. My bf left the country 5yrs ago and since then it has been long distance relationships, our communication was good.

He visited Nigeria December last yr and left the first week of January. He Begged me to wait for him again and I agreed. I’m currently pregnant and I’m scared to keep the baby, I spoke to him about it and he was happy.

Recently he is complaining of not having money and all. he has suddenly change with the way he talk to me and he doesn’t even have plans for me. He hardly calls and hardly pick my calls. I have tried to talk to him about his recent attitude and he will always end up calling me nag.

I’m thinking about going for abortion but I don’t know if it’s a great choice. He is 34yrs, pls I need advice.

Your write up points to the fact that you are a very smart lady, and smart ladies usually make smart decisions. Smart ladies also understand that until a man has gotten his act together he isn't going to commit to a relationship, meaning until he resolved that he is experiencing some level of stability of providing and protecting you, he feels unqualified to commit to you.

Every action and inaction carry consequences, if you keep the child you may have to assume full responsibility for him/her which is no walk in the park. If you abort the child you will have to live with the guilt for the rest of your life.

The fact is that you made a bad decision sleeping with someone you haven't seen for five years, you don't know his sexual history over that time, he could be infected, you could have gotten pregnant etc. The wise thing to do was to protect yourself, except you assumed that getting pregnant will make him commit. These are variables you allowed your emotions make, now you have to make logical decisions about your future.

If you have a source of income, keep the pregnancy please

Do you know if the guy use Christmas opportunity to come in and borrow money or sell their only land to raise money. She said the guy is outside Nigerian,but she didn't mention the country.What if the guy is selling okrika in duala,cotonou,Togo or Ghana? For the guy to come back and have raw sex with the babe shows that he truly love the girl. I think he is misbehaving because he is damn broke now.

LilMissFavvy:
Are you surprised of all the comments above? It only shows how wickeddd majority of men are. He said he is broke, but had money to pay in and out of the country. A good man should stand by his lady through thick and thin, if he doesn't, then he is a wickeddd coward. As for you OP, give birth to the child, don't abort. You have to carry the pregnancy for 9months, nurture the child after birth, before you can even think of going into a new relationship. However, during this time frame, you may likely hear from your guy, all hopes aren't lost. If you still don't hear from him, then you will know you need to move on.

Lols, you are 29 already, do you think your womb is that safe for abortion. Instead of you to keep thanking God for a free sperm, u are talking like a baby who's still taking a breast milk.


The fool is married there already, I will advice you to confronts his family atleast 10years is not a stranger again, then see their reactions if they care and if not omo move on. I'm sure you will have your own money and job at this your age to feed a child.


I wish you stress free pregnancy and safe delivery in Jesus name.


Congratulations sister u will soon become a mother

Let his people come and see your people and make it official even if he doesn't marry you.

thesicilian:
When a man of integrity is broke, he distances himself even from those he loves. Is your boyfriend a man of his word? Consider that.

Personally I wouldn't recommend abortion due to the likely complications, and your age. And the fact that it is for someone you truly love. And what if God doesn't bless you with another child later?

My advice is deliver the child and raise him by yourself. Even if he rejects the child, it is yours for you to love.

What are the likely complications of an abortion done by a qualified medical doctor at less than 8 weeks?
And what happened to her age?
I just want to know

Preshy561:
Any relationship of Morethan 2years without any direction shouldn't be continued and if you are someone that does know her direction and what she wants, you should ask questions and from his answers, you will know which direction the relationship is leading. You obviously wasted your youthful exuberance and looks on a dot, and now, the old man has rejected you.
I'm Sorry, but ask yourself if you are willing to do this or not.

Its so easy to get you riled up sha. Would have thought you would see the story is a fuqin fake. I mean,look a the red flags naaaah....
You dated a guy for 10 years and seemed so unsure of him or his ways of life? What did u do in the 5 years he left? Why would you wanna abort,do you not have a job,support from parents and all? Which 29 year old woman comes online to solicit for advice to remove her baby in such a manner? Does she even need to say a damn thing?

Finally,the title says 'why I want abortion'.. Pretty conclusive right? Does she need to come here and say anything again? But content says 'do I abort it,please advice me'

You wasted your emotions on the topic. I don't waste mine on such

do not do abortion.

Strongmercy123:
Good evenin everyone. Pls I need a word of wisdom and advice from matured minds here. I’m 28 yrs I will be 29 in 2days.

I feel I’m about to make a life mistake. I have been dating my bf for 10yrs now, yes I was young and independent as at that time, the love was so sweet that we could do anything for each other. My bf left the country 5yrs ago and since then it has been long distance relationships, our communication was good.

He visited Nigeria December last yr and left the first week of January. He Begged me to wait for him again and I agreed. I’m currently pregnant and I’m scared to keep the baby, I spoke to him about it and he was happy.

Recently he is complaining of not having money and all. he has suddenly change with the way he talk to me and he doesn’t even have plans for me. He hardly calls and hardly pick my calls. I have tried to talk to him about his recent attitude and he will always end up calling me nag.

I’m thinking about going for abortion but I don’t know if it’s a great choice. He is 34yrs, pls I need advice.

Many of us are looking for such pregnancy and you want to abort

We wicked, das's all.

Since you have informed him already about the pregnancy, there is no need nursing the idea of abortion, besides he accepted the pregnancy.. he may wound you tomorrow if you kill his baby.

10yrs is long no.but as i see ur age u not a baby you knw what you are doing.
as he claim ownership of the baby i say don't abort it.
i see many advice up there very sensible.i respect people privacy so i dont quote ppl anymore cus am a long member in here and i know what is good and bad in here.

as he said he is broke if your family knows about the child they will support you.
i hope you have told your mum.

dont keep.it to yourself Alone.

but that guy must have someone out there he is seeing .
but give birth and keep ur child if he is man enough he will be down.to support you .when.he is loaded.

happy Thursday everyone.
hamatan is too much o.

Enemyofpeace:
Some people go just dey deceive themselves with long distance relationship. This same guy the op is talking about is happily married with tree childrens here at iyana Liverpool in London. You are there waiting for him. Dont go and look for seun or lalasticlala and pin your pregnancy on them before it is two late. For your information i am in love with dominique.

Do u know them?

As for being in another relationship, no doubt about it especially if he isn't a citizen where he is.

It's naija babes I pity the most.
Waiting for abroad husband and the biological clock is ticking. Rejecting good and intended suitors cos u are beclouded by "abroad".

And maybe she purposely got pregnant thinking it will make him hasten up.
Who knows what stories he has been feeding her with.

And after giving birth and training the child. The man may then come for the child and take her or him with him to the so called abroad or she think the child wouldn't wanna follow his abroad daddy.
How many Nigerian men usually marry single mothers?

Strongmercy123:
Good evenin everyone. Pls I need a word of wisdom and advice from matured minds here. I’m 28 yrs I will be 29 in 2days.

I feel I’m about to make a life mistake. I have been dating my bf for 10yrs now, yes I was young and independent as at that time, the love was so sweet that we could do anything for each other. My bf left the country 5yrs ago and since then it has been long distance relationships, our communication was good.

He visited Nigeria December last yr and left the first week of January. He Begged me to wait for him again and I agreed. I’m currently pregnant and I’m scared to keep the baby, I spoke to him about it and he was happy.

Recently he is complaining of not having money and all. he has suddenly change with the way he talk to me and he doesn’t even have plans for me. He hardly calls and hardly pick my calls. I have tried to talk to him about his recent attitude and he will always end up calling me nag.

I’m thinking about going for abortion but I don’t know if it’s a great choice. He is 34yrs, pls I need advice.

Except you are ready to bear the stigma of being a single mother & the financial burden of taking care of a chikd alone...keep the pregnancy.
If I were you,I will opt for an abortion by a qualified doctor and end that relationship immediately.

Your boyfriend probably has a family(wife and kids) abroad,hence his change in attitude on learning you are pregnant.


The age of a woman has nothing to do with safety of abortion.
What is important is the age of the pregnancy and who carries out the procedure.

Married women in their 30s and 40s do abortion everyday in Nigeria.

Use your tongue to count your teeth.

Good morning �
Hope your night was greatly enjoyed?
.
I would love to have you as one of my friends on my group. You can join by clicking on the group link below:

https:///GMAJ4RCEfSIJbYi5zSjjgG

Strongmercy123:
Good evenin everyone. Pls I need a word of wisdom and advice from matured minds here. I’m 28 yrs I will be 29 in 2days.

I feel I’m about to make a life mistake. I have been dating my bf for 10yrs now, yes I was young and independent as at that time, the love was so sweet that we could do anything for each other. My bf left the country 5yrs ago and since then it has been long distance relationships, our communication was good.

He visited Nigeria December last yr and left the first week of January. He Begged me to wait for him again and I agreed. I’m currently pregnant and I’m scared to keep the baby, I spoke to him about it and he was happy.

Recently he is complaining of not having money and all. he has suddenly change with the way he talk to me and he doesn’t even have plans for me. He hardly calls and hardly pick my calls. I have tried to talk to him about his recent attitude and he will always end up calling me nag.

I’m thinking about going for abortion but I don’t know if it’s a great choice. He is 34yrs, pls I need advice.

Have u meet his family and do they know how the relationship has been going? Can they explain his recent attitude and assure u of anything regarding him?

Also has the guy stated his plans for u after the baby? Do u know his hussle and what he’s been doing abroad all this while? A man doesn’t go abroad and remain broke atleast by naija standards unless he’s in a very useless country.

My advice is if he doesn’t listen and explain details to u send him a msg that u are terminating the pregnancy cos u don’t know what his plans are anymore and see if he reacts positively to assure u.

Also while it’s good to wait for a good guy u need to be sure by all standards he’s a good guy, he has to carry u along or instruct his family to assure u and ur family. 10 years is a long time to just throw away like that bt u need to be wise.

Strongmercy123:
Good evenin everyone. Pls I need a word of wisdom and advice from matured minds here. I’m 28 yrs I will be 29 in 2days.

I feel I’m about to make a life mistake. I have been dating my bf for 10yrs now, yes I was young and independent as at that time, the love was so sweet that we could do anything for each other. My bf left the country 5yrs ago and since then it has been long distance relationships, our communication was good.

He visited Nigeria December last yr and left the first week of January. He Begged me to wait for him again and I agreed. I’m currently pregnant and I’m scared to keep the baby, I spoke to him about it and he was happy.

Recently he is complaining of not having money and all. he has suddenly change with the way he talk to me and he doesn’t even have plans for me. He hardly calls and hardly pick my calls. I have tried to talk to him about his recent attitude and he will always end up calling me nag.

I’m thinking about going for abortion but I don’t know if it’s a great choice. He is 34yrs, pls I need advice.

first go his own family first,go and inform them about the pregnancy, hear their opinion then take a decision. You alone wear the shoe.

Strongmercy123:
Good evenin everyone. Pls I need a word of wisdom and advice from matured minds here. I’m 28 yrs I will be 29 in 2days.

I feel I’m about to make a life mistake. I have been dating my bf for 10yrs now, yes I was young and independent as at that time, the love was so sweet that we could do anything for each other. My bf left the country 5yrs ago and since then it has been long distance relationships, our communication was good.

He visited Nigeria December last yr and left the first week of January. He Begged me to wait for him again and I agreed. I’m currently pregnant and I’m scared to keep the baby, I spoke to him about it and he was happy.

Recently he is complaining of not having money and all. he has suddenly change with the way he talk to me and he doesn’t even have plans for me. He hardly calls and hardly pick my calls. I have tried to talk to him about his recent attitude and he will always end up calling me nag.

I’m thinking about going for abortion but I don’t know if it’s a great choice. He is 34yrs, pls I need advice.

MY SINCERE ADVISE,

you have made a mistake already cos u think he loves you, but he is just keeping u to pass away time,

1. Dont push him away totally
2. Stop bothering him or calling him, let him do the calling, ask him how he is doing once in a while so that u wont be blamed.
3 Have the baby BUT NEVER LET HIM KNOW ABOUT IT,- i will never advise anyone to go for abortion...
4. Leave ur life as if you are single and without a boy friend
5. Open ur mind to new suitors and make ur choice if u see a good man


MOST MEN ARE TERRIBLE

CANT BE TRUSTED

spiceadole:


What are the likely complications of an abortion done by a qualified medical doctor at less than 8 weeks?
And what happened to her age?
I just want to know

Abortion done by professional is 100% safe.

The people who do abortion most in Nigeria everyday are married women not single ladies.

Strongmercy123:
Good evenin everyone. Pls I need a word of wisdom and advice from matured minds here. I’m 28 yrs I will be 29 in 2days.

I feel I’m about to make a life mistake. I have been dating my bf for 10yrs now, yes I was young and independent as at that time, the love was so sweet that we could do anything for each other. My bf left the country 5yrs ago and since then it has been long distance relationships, our communication was good.

He visited Nigeria December last yr and left the first week of January. He Begged me to wait for him again and I agreed. I’m currently pregnant and I’m scared to keep the baby, I spoke to him about it and he was happy.

Recently he is complaining of not having money and all. he has suddenly change with the way he talk to me and he doesn’t even have plans for me. He hardly calls and hardly pick my calls. I have tried to talk to him about his recent attitude and he will always end up calling me nag.

I’m thinking about going for abortion but I don’t know if it’s a great choice. He is 34yrs, pls I need advice.

You, my dear, are in for a long dance of pain, confusion, loneliness, stigmatization, ostrasism, rejection, abandonment, financial hardship.
A man who does not love you, and has wasted 10 years of your life, you want to make a baby with him.
Are you sure you are thinking straight?
This means you are about to spend the rest of your life wrapped around a selfish man.
You better deliver yourself and pick up your life from where you have thrown it.
You don't even love yourself and your future.

Do what you think is best for you..nobody on this page would provide support when you need it

I will advise you not to think of abortion at this age of yours...just wait for him,he purposely cane home to impregnate you, he might be going through troubles over there and Moreso when a woman is pregnant, everything might be on lock down...it happens....

Wazzaowner:
After 5 years he came to Nigeria with no future plan wth u and he ends up impregnating u, Naija gurls when una go get sense?

I feel the Op felt she could use pregnancy to tie the man down, now she is in a deep shit.

Carry your mata, I wasn't dere when dick dey enter pussy last December.

Pls! Not all naija girls.

Na Op wey no wan get sense.

Let her be a baby mama and see how many more years she end up married.

Men will just use and dump her. Especially married men and bad boys to sort their konji. She never still understand men yet. I Pity her.

Very few men want to marry a lady with kid or kids.

Strongmercy123, u are an adult u know what to do.
Are u financially capable of taking care of a baby?
Are u ready to stay more years being a play toy to men? Cos that's what they do to most baby mamas who are financially ok

Cos there are so many babymamas still unmarried and they are clocking 50years still waiting to be married.

This life is not that way it seems. Use your head in relationship not your heart.

I can never ever be a babymama. No matter how much I love my man.

Wazzaowner:
After 5 years he came to Nigeria with no future plan wth u and he ends up impregnating u, Naija gurls when una go get sense?

I feel the Op felt she could use pregnancy to tie the man down, now she is in a deep shit.

Carry your mata, I wasn't dere when dick dey enter pussy last December.

Pls! Not all naija girls.

Na Op wey no wan get sense. Dating man for 10 whole years! And possibly driving other suitors away cos she feels her bf will marry and relocate her abroad. Later she will blame village people wey no even reason her matter one bit.

Let her be a baby mama and see how many more years she end up married.

Men will just use and dump her. Especially married men and bad boys to sort their konji. She never still understand men yet. I Pity her.

Very few men want to marry a lady with kid or kids.

Strongmercy123, u are an adult u know what to do.
Are u financially capable of taking care of a baby?
Are u ready to stay more years being a play toy to men? Cos that's what they do to most baby mamas who are NOT financially ok. they are at the mercy of men.

Cos there are so many babymamas still unmarried and they are clocking 50years still waiting to be married.

This life is not that way it seems. Use your head in relationship not your heart.

I can never ever be a babymama. No matter how much I love my man.

Also Abroad guys are the worst set of guys to blindly get pregnant for! Very tricky guys.

They will so waste your time Ehn? U will ask yourself everyday who send u work and become very bitter and dissolutioned about men and life afterwards.

Ladycewhy:
A decade relationship, wow! Sister you try. Let me just say the longer you date a guy without a serious commitment from him ,the less likely he will marry you. I am sure he feels you want to trap him with pregnancy since he failed to marry you after a decade.


Here is the truth,if you are willing to take care of that child yourself and be labeled as "after one" go ahead cos it's obvious that man does not intend to ever marry you. But baby mama title isn't all that bad ,if you ask me tho. Abroad based man lol the trickiest of them all.

You get month

Abortion is not and should not be an option in your case.
You went in, consciously, with an idea of how the relationship may turn out.
As it were, you have a responsibility to live for you, your family and the unborn child/twins/triplets.
I hope the guy will turn around and stand up to some responsibility down the line.
Otherwise, you can always do some petitioning and file for child support- just need to get yourself a good lawyer. And I trust the resources Nairaland has- as regard learned nairalanders.
Let's have follow up as regard how things turn out when you have the baby. I believe Mr Osewa, the admins and who is who can collaborate with us all for a moderate baby shower...
Things happen... be happy you were able to get pregnant- pray that you carry it successfully. The gentleman's act, inaction or behavior is least of your problem(s) for now.

Strongmercy123:
Good evenin everyone. Pls I need a word of wisdom and advice from matured minds here. I’m 28 yrs I will be 29 in 2days.

I feel I’m about to make a life mistake. I have been dating my bf for 10yrs now, yes I was young and independent as at that time, the love was so sweet that we could do anything for each other. My bf left the country 5yrs ago and since then it has been long distance relationships, our communication was good.

He visited Nigeria December last yr and left the first week of January. He Begged me to wait for him again and I agreed. I’m currently pregnant and I’m scared to keep the baby, I spoke to him about it and he was happy.

Recently he is complaining of not having money and all. he has suddenly change with the way he talk to me and he doesn’t even have plans for me. He hardly calls and hardly pick my calls. I have tried to talk to him about his recent attitude and he will always end up calling me nag.

I’m thinking about going for abortion but I don’t know if it’s a great choice. He is 34yrs, pls I need advice.

Good morning, most people says give birth to your baby and move on...... however they will be the first group to call u bitter wen u can’t settle cos of u having a child....just do the thing that will make u less bitter in future

WildChild00:



You get month

She came here to hear the truth ,I am just telling it as it is . If he has not married her all this while it will be foolish to think a pregnancy will make him do the needful. A whole decade wasted on a directionless relationship , people dey try sha. I am suspecting that guy has a live-in gf or even wife there sef. Fear all this disapora men

Strongmercy123:
Good evenin everyone. Pls I need a word of wisdom and advice from matured minds here. I’m 28 yrs I will be 29 in 2days.

I feel I’m about to make a life mistake. I have been dating my bf for 10yrs now, yes I was young and independent as at that time, the love was so sweet that we could do anything for each other. My bf left the country 5yrs ago and since then it has been long distance relationships, our communication was good.

He visited Nigeria December last yr and left the first week of January. He Begged me to wait for him again and I agreed. I’m currently pregnant and I’m scared to keep the baby, I spoke to him about it and he was happy.

Recently he is complaining of not having money and all. he has suddenly change with the way he talk to me and he doesn’t even have plans for me. He hardly calls and hardly pick my calls. I have tried to talk to him about his recent attitude and he will always end up calling me nag.

I’m thinking about going for abortion but I don’t know if it’s a great choice. He is 34yrs, pls I need advice.

Sweeter even than to have had the joy of children of my own has it been for me to help bring about a better state of things for mothers generally, so that their unborn little ones could not be willed away from them.


"Give us the grace... When the sacredness of life before birth is attacked, to stand up and proclaim that no one ever has the authority to destroy unborn life." -John Paul II


"Defend the unborn against abortion even if they persecute you, calumniate you, set traps for you, take you to court or kill you."- Pope Francis


Please I may not know you, but that life means a lot to you, me and many. But you may not know.
protect that unborn because that's your treasure and Dignity.
No one has right to life.
#Prolife
#DefendTheUnborn
That's the advice I can give you. Neglect the persecution and have your treasure come out to the world. Abortion is never the way out of crisis like this.
#EndAbortion
Please protect the child. She's very innocent and she's willing to come to this world, though sinful world it is, you know not what her presence may be to your life and the entire world.
Please dear, shun abortion.
Thanks. And I pray the Good Lord guide your thoughts and steps toward making the right decision, through Christ our Lord, Amen.

Preshy561:

So, tomorrow, the useless old fool will come claim ownership of the child cos that's what most of these idiots do.

he's useless simply because he complained of being temporarily broke abi...9ja ladies with their basket brains

no matter how young/old you are, dating someone for, max, 2 years without sealing it is a waste of time. unless you are also unserious as your partner.


people should stop making this mistake.





for the OP, please, give birth to the baby.

you won't die.