How 'You did not insist' cost my friend his relationship, hence a proposal ring lying fallow in his wardrobe. 


Dramatis personae:
Girl: Ms A
My friend: Mr A
Girl's other boyfriend: Mr B

It was a lovely morning as the clouds basked in the euphoria of another day, overseeing the madness of Lagosians as they went to work. The day also marked the best last quarter of 2019 for Mr A. 

He saw Ms A on her way to work. The moment she caught his attention was the same moment he gravitated towards her as he hoped for a better avenue to develop a seemingly possible relationship...or so he thought.

Mr A, a natural charmer, got along well with Ms A. As with most relationships, it was pertinent to develop a bond. Whilst doing so, dark clouds were forming over this blooming flower of love my friend held. Mr B lurked in the shadows! And he would prove to be a thorn in Mr A's neck. 

Mr B, a devout worshipper, is a typical woman's dream: sensible, industrious, got his shit together with just a few falling--we have all baggage, right? So noone is perfect.

Mr B has been in a relationship with Ms A for about 5 years (within that time frame, Ms A has rejected his marriage proposal twice)
As Mr A was building his ammunition for his romantic love, Mr B was also on the same streak. Ms A hadn't hidden anything from both parties. Mr A and Mr B knew they were competitors. (Channel 171 on @DStv) 


Ms A and Mr A were getting along really great as it appeared she was leaving Mr B...but he wouldn't go down without a fight. He started planning his THIRD proposal. Mr A was planning his first proposal alongside other plans like moving houses and those basic stuff. 

One day in December 2019, Mr A chipped in the idea of proposal, and place but Ms A didn't show up for no genuine reason--at least from Mr A's PoV.

Come January 2020, Mr A refired his ammunition of proposal (not actual proposal though) but Ms A said, "I need a week to be sure." 

Within that week, Ms A cut off communication with Mr A. All efforts to get to her proved abortive. Suddenly, the dark clouds rained horror.
Prior to the one-week hiatus of Ms A, she had 'broken' off with Mr B who had then landed in the hospital due to HBP. 

Man was distraught. We all felt his pain.

In the wake of his collapse and hospitalisation, Mr B's mum had to do something to save her son; she invited Ms A for a discussion which Ms A acceded to. 

Ms A walked into a proposal party setup by Mr B's mum.


"To save him another embarrassment, I had to collect it", she told Mr A, "I'd return it", she concluded. Mr A was 'assured' as the night sank into the realm of possibilities. 

That weekend, Mr A's WhatsApp brought him a devastating, nerve shattering discovery. Ms A, proudly rocking her ring, was dancing at a party with Mr B. Still calm, Mr A reached out to Ms A.
"I thought I blocked you on WhatsApp", she said.
"What!?"
"Didn't want you to see it." 


Slightly rattled, Mr A made his own proposal move.

Ms A rejected!

"But this wasn't the discussion", Mr A quizzed.
"If you had proposed earlier, I would have accepted." Mr A reminded Ms A of the proposed party where he wanted to propose but she failed to show up.

"Yeah, but you did not insist that I come."

"What!?"

"I said I was busy and you said okay, you should have insisted." 


All emotions rolled into one. Mr A had lost Ms A to Mr B because he failed to insist that she should attend a beach party.

End of story! 

Oh, Mr A is in bad shape though but everything is surmountable with grit and love. His proposal ring is still waiting...

Is this a story or real life?

The girl must be made of gold for two men to fight tooth and nail to get her.

bukatyne:
Is this a story or real life?

The girl must be made of gold for two men to fight tooth and nail to get her.

Yeah. My friend is still recovering.

bukatyne:
Is this a story or real life?

The girl must be made of gold for two men to fight tooth and nail to get her.

Hi there ...Don't understand the competition .Tell your friend they are many fish in the ocean.He should get over it quickly.

uruba23:

Hi there ...Don't understand the competition .Tell your friend they are many fish in the ocean.

He's close to 40, and the lady seems to tick all the boxes for him. Hopefully he'd come out strong.

He should thank God, na those kind of girls dey like make dem use force for the first time

Someone respected your schedule and you fvrk him off. Weird Women

NifemiOlu:

He's close to 40, and the lady seems to tick all the boxes for him. Hopefully he'd come out strong.

He should not worry. Life begins at 40.

NifemiOlu:

He's close to 40, and the lady seems to tick all the boxes for him. Hopefully he'd come out strong.

Okay I do understand..but he should learn to have dominant relationship and a redundant one as back up in case the dominant one leaves .He should also avoid too much emotional investment.I really like this my red-yellow hopefully green girlfriend, we maintain a good level of mutual emotional investment even if she walks away today.I would still keep my heads high,knowing what we had wasn't blind in anyway .

There is more to life than all this childish display of irresponsibilities.

Karma at work...he should go n settle with his ex-babes

justnock:


He should not worry. Life begins at 40

unbranded13:
Karma at work...he should go n settle with his ex-babes

bukatyne:
Is this a story or real life?

The girl must be made of gold for two men to fight tooth and nail to get her.

Now that's a high quality woman

Men who lack self-esteem have been making women whose self-esteem is rooted in weak self-sufficiency to be feeling fly like superhumans since time immemorial.

LordKO:
Men who lack self-esteem have been making women whose self-esteem are rooted in weak self-sufficiency to be feeling fly like superhumans since time immemorial.

In my opinion, her self esteem is on point

uruba23:

Okay I do understand..but he should learn to have dominant relationship and a redundant one as back up in case the dominant one leaves .He should also avoid too much emotional investment.I really like this my red-yellow hopefully green girlfriend, we maintain a good level of mutual emotional investment even if she walks away today.I would still keep my heads high,knowing what we had wasn't blind in anyway .

it's because the op's ex girlfriend took this your advice that we are here

funmisticqueen2:
it's because the op's ex girlfriend took this your advice that we are here

Well unfortunately that is the reality you don't put all your egg in one basket else desperation sets in..You do lose your mind if she elope some even commit suicide...meanwhile it is just one party doing all the loving ....my red and yellow girlfriend is more of my soul mate at least that is how I see her, but if she choose to go for someone else I won't break down I would simply wish her the very best not because I am not crazy about her but life has thought me many lessons sometimes things happens for a reason and OP friend need not trouble himself much.Yes she might have all the alluring qualities but would she be happy living with you,are your soul tie together.Enough of my epistles ....Happy Sunday.

uruba23:

Well unfortunately that is the reality you don't put all your egg in one basket else desperation sets in..You do lose your mind if she elope some even commit suicide...meanwhile it is just one party doing all the loving ....my red and yellow girlfriend is more of my soul mate at least that is how I see her, but if she choose to go for someone else I won't break down I would simply wish her the very best not because I am not crazy about her but life has thought me many lessons sometimes things happens for a reason and OP friend need not trouble himself much.Yes she might have all the alluring qualities but would she be happy living with you,are your soul tie together.Enough of my epistles ....Happy Sunday.

What if the two women stay till the end?

NifemiOlu:

What if the two women stay till the end?

I said one is dominant the other is redundant..which means one stay at the friend zone but still very much under consideration.

uruba23:

I said one is dominant the other is redundant..which means one stay at the friend zone but still very much under consideration.

LordKO:
Men who lack self-esteem have been making women whose self-esteem are rooted in weak self-sufficiency to be feeling fly like superhumans since time immemorial.

How can a complete gentleman with the value he has to offer compete with any man for a girl?

He obviously has no worth or value.

All I can say is Mr B would soon come to create a thread on nairaland about how his wife does not love him and is cold towards him

Mariangeles:
All I can say is Mr B would soon come to create a thread on nairaland about how his wife does not love him and is cold towards him

Can you please expatiate on this?

NifemiOlu:

Can you please expatiate on this?

It's simple. Ms A does not love either of the two.
No man should ever insist to be with a woman who does not love him.
Women are easily irritated by someone who they do not love, and they'd let you know through their attitude.
Can you as a man live with a woman who is not affectionate?

Two foolish guys, I hate guys that drool over a lady that constantly rejected them, like wtf!!! Wimps.

LordKO:
Men who lack self-esteem have been making women whose self-esteem are rooted in weak self-sufficiency to be feeling fly like superhumans since time immemorial.

Thank you, weak disgraceful men.

So many weak. Men. Nowadays?.. No what if he is 40?..is that the end of the world?.. One small guy will now be playing pimping on his head!!.. He should move on.. There are lots of reasonable gals around if he searches well.. Not all these kids with one bra and two pants.. Nansense!!

Ms B is funny,I can't stand an irritant-someone that doesn't take a no for no.

When you pester me I back off

bukatyne:
Is this a story or real life?
The girl must be made of gold for two men to fight tooth and nail to get her.

THESE ARE THE LOUSY MEN MARTINEZ39s PREACHES AGAINST.

uruba23:

Hi there ...Don't understand the competition .Tell your friend they are many fish in the ocean.He should get over it quickly.

once I notice a girl is using me to do "make your choice" with anoda guy, I block her immediately, I don't believe in there's a destined girl for a guy, na who dey with you for old age be destined wife....god punish devil and destined wife.