Amya:


I don't do "i told you so'

The problem I see here is you know how to type on the internet but don't know how to have a conversation with your husband. Go fix that.


I was nearly duped too , someone called my uncle about a job and he called me and gave their number . My uncle kept pressuring me about it , I knew right way that it was a scam and I knew my uncle was ignorant of the whole deal . After shutting the scammers down ,I told my uncle straight up and even gave him examples , he was happy I didn't fall victim and the matter died .


You can imply your sister in-law is being used , that way ,it won't seem like a direct accusation.You know your husband more than any of us. Have the conversation with him ,you know how best to put the words to him in a way it doesn't suggest his sister is directly involved.

Amya:


Co- wife also loosely translates to husband brothers wife you know ?

Ok ma...well explained..though some people might think like me.

Why not start a business with such money ma..
You can
1)open a supermarket
2)wholesale of babe cloths or diapers
3) selling weavons, attachment and employ someone to make hair
4) poultry farming or cultivating some crops like cassava, groundnut in a commercial quantity..

You can start from there...I know you're a lawyer but it doesn't really matter, the money making is the deal

Amya:
I've been looking to get a federal agency job in Abuja for a while now and haven't yet had any reasonable connection.

My sister inlaw ( husband's sister) a lady in her mid 40s who's divorced and a hustler type still trying to find her feet called me up one day and told me a friend of hers had a connection for Civil Defence and i should email my CV right away to her. I have never discussed jobs with her before so the call took me by surprise. I wasnt particular keen on Civil Defence and as a lawyer i had my sights much higher on parastatal or agency jobs. She might have sensed my reluctance on the phone and she went on to say

"I'm just doing you a favour ooo, many people are hoping for opportunities as this"

She had this tone of urgency.

I didnt especially like how she was hurrying me as i never approach anything with desperation and as such, have never been scammed. I told her I'll get back to her. Two hours later, she was messaging me on whatsapp that she hadn't seen my CV on her mailbox. I replied her saying

"Aunty i haven't sent it ooo, is the job slot free because me i don't have money ooo"

This was a very dicey situation for me because this woman is over 10 years my senior and i wanted to be as diplomatic as possible without causing family wahala.

She read my response but didnt reply.

Very early the next morning she called me and when i picked up, she said that the job wasnt free but the price wasnt too much, just N350k. That i shouldn't worry that she'll call my hubby (her brother) and ask him for the money. When i saw she was still pushing, i opened up to her that even if i wanted to pay for a job slot, it definitely wasnt going to be a Civil Defence job as i had my sights set on agencies and parastatals. I knew she was upset by how her voice changed. "Agencies? What's that?" I told her like NNPC, DPR, NCC and the likes
"NNPC? ehnnn.. Okay" She cut the call and i heaved a sigh that it was over. It wasn't.

Two days later, this woman called me again to tell me she has an NNPC job for me.

(you've gat to be kidding me!)

She said that her friend knows the director and he asked for one million but after begging him, he agreed to take 500k she started with her hurrying tactics that i had only 24hrs and if payment wasn't made before then that the offer will be withdrawn. At that time, NNPC were done with their recruitment process and i didnt even apply and knowing how stringent NNPC recruitment was, i knew that offer was impossible. She went on that if I didn't have the cash that she'd call her brother (hubby) to make the transfer immediately. I knew right then without a doubt that this woman wanted to use me to obtain her brother by all means. She can try to scam him directly and if he falls mugu, good for her but why try to use me in the scam? I went further with questioning her on the supposed NNPC job. "Please Aunty the director that is helping, where is he?
" Abuja nau" she replied getting irritated with my questioning.

She was in Lagos and i was in Abuja at the time
so i asked her if i could meet the supposed director one on one and pay him directly and even promised to reward her and her friend handsomely if the deal pulls through.

"No" she said abruptly "you pay the money to my account and ill give it to my friend to make the payment. All you have to do is just hope and pray"

Pray... That word. I knew then without a doubt that this Aunty was trying to scam me.

I told her "Aunty please dont be angry, i know you mean well for my future and want me to get a good job in NNPC but right now I've already paid part payment for another job somewhere and i wouldn't want to invest in two places at once" That wasnt true, i just had to get her off my tail once and for all. She was shocked. She angrily cut the call. She wanted to finesse her brother out of some cash using my future, what happens when the real slot comes around. Would i expect him to pay twice?

Her mum (mil) called me and started blasting me. Saying I'm feeling too big to be helped and her daughter was only trying to help me and now she never wanted to have anything to do with me again. That i should call her daughter and take the offer so that peace would reign. I didnt. Even my hubby blamed me and i couldn't even open my mouth to tell anyone i thought the whole setup was a scam. That's such a big accusation to make. The family dislike for me grew worse because of that incident.

Please did i do wrong?



Modified: For those asking me to talk to hubby, ofcourse i did but he genuinely believes his sister was trying to help and since i couldnt point out outright that the whole thing smelt of scam, hr thinks i rejected the offer because of pride. But i know better. It didnt cause serious issue between us though.

Marry ur friend una no go hear word. The issues are still coming as long as she didn't get that money. Take this comment to the bank.

Una get time dey advise person wey wise pass una

Every home and family is built differently, but god knows, my woman would have told be straight up.....seems aunty wanna play some games, we gon laugh about it and that is it........I il personally hint my woman coded on my aunties behaviours, most especially if my woman is very matured. Men, please protect your women if you have a big family that loves interfering, or at least make her unreachable to certain family members.

Amya:
Modified: What's it with nairaland guys and they always trying desperately to fault women in any post concerning them. How can i in good conscience tell my husband that his sister is trying to scam us? Do you know the blowout that could happen from it? The bad blood that may be forever caused by such accusstion? Yeah my sil was trying to pull a con, but she's not the devil. Even now, I respect her and still relate well with her especially as she didnt succeed.

The way i did it was the best because even now, everything has died down. Pkatakpata they'd only say i was too big to take the job offer. That isnt a sin.

.

How did knw you knw it has died down? As a lawyer you know what they called "remote causes" & immediate causes" in future battles.

Let me advice you in case of another time in which you want to fight battle that has to do with ur in laws , you should fight it through ur husband, if not, you maybe putting urself in a very dangerous position.

Going by ur illustration, you said ur husband also joined them to blame u, next time if u don't handle it with caution it may consume you.

You are a woman, closer to ur husband more than any of his siblings, the issue was even, a personal one. You were supposed to convince ur husband,ur legal background would have been a great help. Having convinced him, thre is notting wrong if you tell ur hubby that you smell scam, if as a *lawyer wife' you can't convince ur hubby on bed, how will u convince judges in court room?

You would have told ur in law to talk to ur husband, the battle will now be family to family and not our wife is disobeying in-laws,

Liftmaster:
It may have escaped your notice, but the scheme you described is illegal, immoral and abhorrent. What is the money to be used for? Bribe the Director? Curry favor from a government agency or directorate? It is unfortunate that this type of behavior is generally accepted in Nigerian society today. In case you're wondering what you should have done, you should have stated clearly that this is an illegal act and you will not be involved in such a despicable scheme. If you have 350 - 500k laying around, why not start a business or invest in something? If bribery is what it takes to get a govt agency job, you should abstain, maintain your honor and prevent any blemish to your conscience.

Aptly put!
Ehmm, barman! Barman, where you now? One chilled Budweiser for this my person abeg, and a fully loaded plate of nkwobi!

Amya:
I've been looking to get a federal agency job in Abuja for a while now and haven't yet had any reasonable connection.

My sister inlaw ( husband's sister) a lady in her mid 40s who's divorced and a hustler type still trying to find her feet called me up one day and told me a friend of hers had a connection for Civil Defence and i should email my CV right away to her. I have never discussed jobs with her before so the call took me by surprise. I wasnt particular keen on Civil Defence and as a lawyer i had my sights much higher on parastatal or agency jobs. She might have sensed my reluctance on the phone and she went on to say

"I'm just doing you a favour ooo, many people are hoping for opportunities as this"

She had this tone of urgency.

I didnt especially like how she was hurrying me as i never approach anything with desperation and as such, have never been scammed. I told her I'll get back to her. Two hours later, she was messaging me on whatsapp that she hadn't seen my CV on her mailbox. I replied her saying

"Aunty i haven't sent it ooo, is the job slot free because me i don't have money ooo"

This was a very dicey situation for me because this woman is over 10 years my senior and i wanted to be as diplomatic as possible without causing family wahala.

She read my response but didnt reply.

Very early the next morning she called me and when i picked up, she said that the job wasnt free but the price wasnt too much, just N350k. That i shouldn't worry that she'll call my hubby (her brother) and ask him for the money. When i saw she was still pushing, i opened up to her that even if i wanted to pay for a job slot, it definitely wasnt going to be a Civil Defence job as i had my sights set on agencies and parastatals. I knew she was upset by how her voice changed. "Agencies? What's that?" I told her like NNPC, DPR, NCC and the likes
"NNPC? ehnnn.. Okay" She cut the call and i heaved a sigh that it was over. It wasn't.

Two days later, this woman called me again to tell me she has an NNPC job for me.

(you've gat to be kidding me!)

She said that her friend knows the director and he asked for one million but after begging him, he agreed to take 500k she started with her hurrying tactics that i had only 24hrs and if payment wasn't made before then that the offer will be withdrawn. At that time, NNPC were done with their recruitment process and i didnt even apply and knowing how stringent NNPC recruitment was, i knew that offer was impossible. She went on that if I didn't have the cash that she'd call her brother (hubby) to make the transfer immediately. I knew right then without a doubt that this woman wanted to use me to obtain her brother by all means. She can try to scam him directly and if he falls mugu, good for her but why try to use me in the scam? I went further with questioning her on the supposed NNPC job. "Please Aunty the director that is helping, where is he?
" Abuja nau" she replied getting irritated with my questioning.

She was in Lagos and i was in Abuja at the time
so i asked her if i could meet the supposed director one on one and pay him directly and even promised to reward her and her friend handsomely if the deal pulls through.

"No" she said abruptly "you pay the money to my account and ill give it to my friend to make the payment. All you have to do is just hope and pray"

Pray... That word. I knew then without a doubt that this Aunty was trying to scam me.

I told her "Aunty please dont be angry, i know you mean well for my future and want me to get a good job in NNPC but right now I've already paid part payment for another job somewhere and i wouldn't want to invest in two places at once" That wasnt true, i just had to get her off my tail once and for all. She was shocked. She angrily cut the call. She wanted to finesse her brother out of some cash using my future, what happens when the real slot comes around. Would i expect him to pay twice?

Her mum (mil) called me and started blasting me. Saying I'm feeling too big to be helped and her daughter was only trying to help me and now she never wanted to have anything to do with me again. That i should call her daughter and take the offer so that peace would reign. I didnt. Even my hubby blamed me and i couldn't even open my mouth to tell anyone i thought the whole setup was a scam. That's such a big accusation to make. The family dislike for me grew worse because of that incident.

Please did i do wrong?



Modified: For those asking me to talk to hubby, ofcourse i did but he genuinely believes his sister was trying to help and since i couldnt point out outright that the whole thing smelt of scam, hr thinks i rejected the offer because of pride. But i know better. It didnt cause serious issue between us though.

out have done the right thing. Simply talk to him again, tell him of your fears but make his sister look innocent by blaming the supposed friend for wanting to scam all of you as is usually the case with such things.

tunjilana:
If you cannot confidently tell your spouse what you feel about a situation like this, then something is wrong with how u both relate.

The ideal thing is that you tell him and if he shares your opinion, he will handle his sister and family in a way that they will think he is the one who doeant even want you to pick it up and start feeling pity for u sef...

Couples should use each other to neutralise threats from their families while they remain United and do not open up one another for ridicule. If it was your fam too...he will let u implement your mutual decision on the matter while he stays underground.

That is how marriage should be...but these days you have a lot of overtly sensitive people who are yet to take a stand between their extended family and nuclear family

Your comment is the best I have learnt oo... really educative

Amya:


If you're not married, you may not understand. I always try not to involve myself in my husband and sibling's business. I only shut this one down because it involves me.

I am married... My husband knows that anything that will eventually come back to bite me and my children, I will fight it out with all my strength o.....
I won't be struggling/hustling and putting my all and you now want your own to be different.....I no dey gree o

Amya:
I've been looking to get a federal agency job in Abuja for a while now and haven't yet had any reasonable connection.

My sister inlaw ( husband's sister) a lady in her mid 40s who's divorced and a hustler type still trying to find her feet called me up one day and told me a friend of hers had a connection for Civil Defence and i should email my CV right away to her. I have never discussed jobs with her before so the call took me by surprise. I wasnt particular keen on Civil Defence and as a lawyer i had my sights much higher on parastatal or agency jobs. She might have sensed my reluctance on the phone and she went on to say

"I'm just doing you a favour ooo, many people are hoping for opportunities as this"

She had this tone of urgency.

I didnt especially like how she was hurrying me as i never approach anything with desperation and as such, have never been scammed. I told her I'll get back to her. Two hours later, she was messaging me on whatsapp that she hadn't seen my CV on her mailbox. I replied her saying

"Aunty i haven't sent it ooo, is the job slot free because me i don't have money ooo"

This was a very dicey situation for me because this woman is over 10 years my senior and i wanted to be as diplomatic as possible without causing family wahala.

She read my response but didnt reply.

Very early the next morning she called me and when i picked up, she said that the job wasnt free but the price wasnt too much, just N350k. That i shouldn't worry that she'll call my hubby (her brother) and ask him for the money. When i saw she was still pushing, i opened up to her that even if i wanted to pay for a job slot, it definitely wasnt going to be a Civil Defence job as i had my sights set on agencies and parastatals. I knew she was upset by how her voice changed. "Agencies? What's that?" I told her like NNPC, DPR, NCC and the likes
"NNPC? ehnnn.. Okay" She cut the call and i heaved a sigh that it was over. It wasn't.

Two days later, this woman called me again to tell me she has an NNPC job for me.

(you've gat to be kidding me!)

She said that her friend knows the director and he asked for one million but after begging him, he agreed to take 500k she started with her hurrying tactics that i had only 24hrs and if payment wasn't made before then that the offer will be withdrawn. At that time, NNPC were done with their recruitment process and i didnt even apply and knowing how stringent NNPC recruitment was, i knew that offer was impossible. She went on that if I didn't have the cash that she'd call her brother (hubby) to make the transfer immediately. I knew right then without a doubt that this woman wanted to use me to obtain her brother by all means. She can try to scam him directly and if he falls mugu, good for her but why try to use me in the scam? I went further with questioning her on the supposed NNPC job. "Please Aunty the director that is helping, where is he?
" Abuja nau" she replied getting irritated with my questioning.

She was in Lagos and i was in Abuja at the time
so i asked her if i could meet the supposed director one on one and pay him directly and even promised to reward her and her friend handsomely if the deal pulls through.

"No" she said abruptly "you pay the money to my account and ill give it to my friend to make the payment. All you have to do is just hope and pray"

Pray... That word. I knew then without a doubt that this Aunty was trying to scam me.

I told her "Aunty please dont be angry, i know you mean well for my future and want me to get a good job in NNPC but right now I've already paid part payment for another job somewhere and i wouldn't want to invest in two places at once" That wasnt true, i just had to get her off my tail once and for all. She was shocked. She angrily cut the call. She wanted to finesse her brother out of some cash using my future, what happens when the real slot comes around. Would i expect him to pay twice?

Her mum (mil) called me and started blasting me. Saying I'm feeling too big to be helped and her daughter was only trying to help me and now she never wanted to have anything to do with me again. That i should call her daughter and take the offer so that peace would reign. I didnt. Even my hubby blamed me and i couldn't even open my mouth to tell anyone i thought the whole setup was a scam. That's such a big accusation to make. The family dislike for me grew worse because of that incident.

Please did i do wrong?



Modified: For those asking me to talk to hubby, ofcourse i did but he genuinely believes his sister was trying to help and since i couldnt point out outright that the whole thing smelt of scam, hr thinks i rejected the offer because of pride. But i know better. It didnt cause serious issue between us though.

You don't know how government employment works in Nigeria. You expect a director to openly collect money from you?

you are too smart joor, i like ur wisdom. marriages these days are more like politics, u have to be cautious of ur words and dare not speak bad against ur in-laws cos they ll never believe you...lots of young girls dont that.

Amya:


I dont think hubby blabbed. They hadly communicate even. She pulled that not just with me but with my co wife. She succeeded with co-wife and when when no job came out of it, i got a little break especially from her mum. But even with that failed incident, i dare not say my co-wife was scammed.

Organicist95:


What is history there?? So this is all you could get from the post?
Did she mention the woman's name? Did she post her picture?
What are you even saying

Yes! that was the only thing I could get. Na una way

That was how I fall mugu for one of my kings man. Immediately after my service he came to my father and started talking about a job in same civil defense in Abuja. We gather 500k for me and my cousin and gave to this man. Till date this man no dey pick our calls again. He no dey visit village again.

ojuu4u:
.

How did knw it has died down? As a lawyer you know what they remote causes, in future battle.

Let me advice you in case of another time in which you want to fight battle that has to do with ur in laws , you should fight it through ur husband, if not, you maybe putting urself in a very dangerous position.

Going by ur illustration, you said ur husband also joined them to blame u, next time if u don't handle it with caution it may consume you

You are a woman, closer to ur husband more than any of his siblings, the issue was even, a personal one. You were supposed to convince ur husband most especially when u re a lawyer, having convinced him, thre is notting wrong if you tell ur hubby that you smell scam, if as a *lawyer wife' you can't convince ur hubby on bed, how will u convince judge in court room?

You will tell ur in law to talk to ur husband, the battle will now be family to family and not our wife is disobeying in-laws,

It's not a do or die affair. Job is not by force. Sil said she has a job for me, i told her i paid for another one. She got upset about it because she must have believed I'll fall for that scam. She'll move on from it if she hasnt already.

lack of communication is the foundation of marriage malfunctioning


it's obvious there was no communication whatsoever between you and your husband, your sister in law knows this hence her cunning penetration through you


you've to open up how you feel about it to your husband without thinking one nonsense consequence


let him know why you reject the offer because it will always appear you're proud than safe in his thought

Auty you did wrong and your husband was right about the pride thing!

You are the type that will conceal dark info from your partner for ages under the guise of protecting them but if the burden becomes real cumbersome you start crafting a way to blame someone else.

Simple matter, papa Emeka.., look at what your sister has been proposing ooo, Me I no too trust the thing and it's best for you to handle it since she's your blood. Shikina!
By nau you for no de do thread.


No mind me share, I just de try advice you.

Ladycewhy:
The problem I see here is you know how to type on the internet but don't know how to have a conversation with your husband. Go fix that.


I was nearly duped too , someone called my uncle about a job and he called me and gave their number . My uncle kept pressuring me about it , I knew right way that it was a scam and I knew my uncle was ignorant of the whole deal . After shutting the scammers down ,I told my uncle straight up and even gave him examples , he was happy I didn't fall victim and the matter died .


You can imply your sister in-law is being used , that way ,it won't seem like a direct accusation.You know your husband more than any of us. Have the conversation with him ,you know how best to put the words to him in a way it doesn't suggest his sister is directly involved.

Who told you we didnt have a conversation about it? Where did you get that from?

I told him that his sister could mean well and i just wasn't sure the source and when a source I'm sure about comes around, only then will we pay, but if he still believes the job is legit, he can go ahead and pay. Of course he didn't pay and the whole thing ended there.

Amya:


Who told you we didnt have a conversation about it? Where did you get that from?

I told him that his sister could mean well and i just wasn't sure the source and when a source I'm sure about comes around, only then will we pay, but if he still believes the job is legit, he can go ahead and pay. Of course he didn't pay and the whole thing ended there.

If it ended there ,I don't think you will be creating this thread

adisabarber:


You don't know how government employment works in Nigeria. You expect a director to openly collect money from you?

Yesso. The transfer trail is even what implicates them, so they prefer cash.

Amya:
I've been looking to get a federal agency job in Abuja for a while now and haven't yet had any reasonable connection.

My sister inlaw ( husband's sister) a lady in her mid 40s who's divorced and a hustler type still trying to find her feet called me up one day and told me a friend of hers had a connection for Civil Defence and i should email my CV right away to her. I have never discussed jobs with her before so the call took me by surprise. I wasnt particular keen on Civil Defence and as a lawyer i had my sights much higher on parastatal or agency jobs. She might have sensed my reluctance on the phone and she went on to say

"I'm just doing you a favour ooo, many people are hoping for opportunities as this"

She had this tone of urgency.

I didnt especially like how she was hurrying me as i never approach anything with desperation and as such, have never been scammed. I told her I'll get back to her. Two hours later, she was messaging me on whatsapp that she hadn't seen my CV on her mailbox. I replied her saying

"Aunty i haven't sent it ooo, is the job slot free because me i don't have money ooo"

This was a very dicey situation for me because this woman is over 10 years my senior and i wanted to be as diplomatic as possible without causing family wahala.

She read my response but didnt reply.

Very early the next morning she called me and when i picked up, she said that the job wasnt free but the price wasnt too much, just N350k. That i shouldn't worry that she'll call my hubby (her brother) and ask him for the money. When i saw she was still pushing, i opened up to her that even if i wanted to pay for a job slot, it definitely wasnt going to be a Civil Defence job as i had my sights set on agencies and parastatals. I knew she was upset by how her voice changed. "Agencies? What's that?" I told her like NNPC, DPR, NCC and the likes
"NNPC? ehnnn.. Okay" She cut the call and i heaved a sigh that it was over. It wasn't.

Two days later, this woman called me again to tell me she has an NNPC job for me.

(you've gat to be kidding me!)

She said that her friend knows the director and he asked for one million but after begging him, he agreed to take 500k she started with her hurrying tactics that i had only 24hrs and if payment wasn't made before then that the offer will be withdrawn. At that time, NNPC were done with their recruitment process and i didnt even apply and knowing how stringent NNPC recruitment was, i knew that offer was impossible. She went on that if I didn't have the cash that she'd call her brother (hubby) to make the transfer immediately. I knew right then without a doubt that this woman wanted to use me to obtain her brother by all means. She can try to scam him directly and if he falls mugu, good for her but why try to use me in the scam? I went further with questioning her on the supposed NNPC job. "Please Aunty the director that is helping, where is he?
" Abuja nau" she replied getting irritated with my questioning.

She was in Lagos and i was in Abuja at the time
so i asked her if i could meet the supposed director one on one and pay him directly and even promised to reward her and her friend handsomely if the deal pulls through.

"No" she said abruptly "you pay the money to my account and ill give it to my friend to make the payment. All you have to do is just hope and pray"

Pray... That word. I knew then without a doubt that this Aunty was trying to scam me.

I told her "Aunty please dont be angry, i know you mean well for my future and want me to get a good job in NNPC but right now I've already paid part payment for another job somewhere and i wouldn't want to invest in two places at once" That wasnt true, i just had to get her off my tail once and for all. She was shocked. She angrily cut the call. She wanted to finesse her brother out of some cash using my future, what happens when the real slot comes around. Would i expect him to pay twice?

Her mum (mil) called me and started blasting me. Saying I'm feeling too big to be helped and her daughter was only trying to help me and now she never wanted to have anything to do with me again. That i should call her daughter and take the offer so that peace would reign. I didnt. Even my hubby blamed me and i couldn't even open my mouth to tell anyone i thought the whole setup was a scam. That's such a big accusation to make. The family dislike for me grew worse because of that incident.

Please did i do wrong?



Modified: For those asking me to talk to hubby, ofcourse i did but he genuinely believes his sister was trying to help and since i couldnt point out outright that the whole thing smelt of scam, hr thinks i rejected the offer because of pride. But i know better. It didnt cause serious issue between us though.

You need to invest more good will with your husband. They are not done so try pulling your husband closer.


Pele! I also think she wanted to scam you.

Ladycewhy:
If it ended there ,I don't think you will be creating this thread

So what happened after since you seem to know my story more than me?

cnonyechi:
You obviously block your husband from giving his family enough money with ur smartness, pls stop it. Even if it was a scam its left to her brother to decide whether to pay or not.
The family now feel they can only get money from their brother thru you his wife, and that's a very bad thing. Let ur husband decide wat and wen to give to his family. Finally use your smartness to mend ur relationship with ur in laws and if ur husband is wealthy tell him to give some money to the sister she obviously needs money.

I agree with this to some extent. Dont let yourself be used as a pun.

Amya:


So what happened after since you seem to know my story more than me?

Nor vex , na you bring am here make we make suggestions. . If you are not willing to see it from all angles except the ones that are sweet to your ears ,then there was no point bringing it here.


If it ended there ,why are you asking us if you did wrong? Ok let me answer your question, you didn't do anything wrong, your sister in-law is a scammer and your mother inlaw is evil, I hope thats ok by you?

Nairaboi:

Yes! that was the only thing I could get. Na una way

...don't have time for your type

madam.the first tin you should av do is to let ur husband know ,thank u for ur smartness if not that old woman will.just put u in a big prb between u and ur husband

Ladycewhy:

If it ended there ,why are you asking us if you did wrong? Ok let me answer your question, you didn't do anything wrong, your sister in-law is a scammer and your mother inlaw is evil, I hope thats ok by you?

This is what you should have said since instead of talking out of point. Btw my MIL isnt evil and isnt part of the scam. Infact, she was scamned too as she was the one that actually paid for my co-wife. Her daughter is the scammer though.

Amya:

This is what you should have said since instead of talking out of point. Btw my MIL isnt evil and isnt part of the scam. Infact, she was scamned too as she was the one that actually paid for my co-wife. Her daughter is the scammer though.

See I am not concerned about your sister in-law or your mother inlaw, I am more concerned about the relationship between you and your husband. Even if your in-laws are devil's apprentices ,the support of your husband is what I want you to work on. Focus more on that please

Amya:


It's not a do or die affair. Job is not by force. Sil said she has a job for me, i told her i paid for another one. She got upset about it because she must have believed I'll fall for that scam. She'll move on from it if she hasnt already.

The way you are answering those who have contrary opinion towards your issue says a lot about ur attitude & relationship towards ur hubby and by extension his siblings. Little wonder ur hubby joined his people to reprimanded you.
In future don't surprise if ur husband join forces to chase u out, God forbid.

If your story is true, I pray God should give u wisdom and perseverance to win so many battles ahead maritally.

You said something in one of ur comments which shows the level of ur wisdom in marriage, am very sure ur marriage is still in infancy stage.... " and the matter had been completely died down"

That statement is not supposed to be uttered by lawyer, maybe because u haven't be practising law.

Amya:
I've been looking to get a federal agency job in Abuja for a while now and haven't yet had any reasonable connection.

My sister inlaw ( husband's sister) a lady in her mid 40s who's divorced and a hustler type still trying to find her feet called me up one day and told me a friend of hers had a connection for Civil Defence and i should email my CV right away to her. I have never discussed jobs with her before so the call took me by surprise. I wasnt particular keen on Civil Defence and as a lawyer i had my sights much higher on parastatal or agency jobs. She might have sensed my reluctance on the phone and she went on to say

"I'm just doing you a favour ooo, many people are hoping for opportunities as this"

She had this tone of urgency.

I didnt especially like how she was hurrying me as i never approach anything with desperation and as such, have never been scammed. I told her I'll get back to her. Two hours later, she was messaging me on whatsapp that she hadn't seen my CV on her mailbox. I replied her saying

"Aunty i haven't sent it ooo, is the job slot free because me i don't have money ooo"

This was a very dicey situation for me because this woman is over 10 years my senior and i wanted to be as diplomatic as possible without causing family wahala.

She read my response but didnt reply.

Very early the next morning she called me and when i picked up, she said that the job wasnt free but the price wasnt too much, just N350k. That i shouldn't worry that she'll call my hubby (her brother) and ask him for the money. When i saw she was still pushing, i opened up to her that even if i wanted to pay for a job slot, it definitely wasnt going to be a Civil Defence job as i had my sights set on agencies and parastatals. I knew she was upset by how her voice changed. "Agencies? What's that?" I told her like NNPC, DPR, NCC and the likes
"NNPC? ehnnn.. Okay" She cut the call and i heaved a sigh that it was over. It wasn't.

Two days later, this woman called me again to tell me she has an NNPC job for me.

(you've gat to be kidding me!)

She said that her friend knows the director and he asked for one million but after begging him, he agreed to take 500k she started with her hurrying tactics that i had only 24hrs and if payment wasn't made before then that the offer will be withdrawn. At that time, NNPC were done with their recruitment process and i didnt even apply and knowing how stringent NNPC recruitment was, i knew that offer was impossible. She went on that if I didn't have the cash that she'd call her brother (hubby) to make the transfer immediately. I knew right then without a doubt that this woman wanted to use me to obtain her brother by all means. She can try to scam him directly and if he falls mugu, good for her but why try to use me in the scam? I went further with questioning her on the supposed NNPC job. "Please Aunty the director that is helping, where is he?
" Abuja nau" she replied getting irritated with my questioning.

She was in Lagos and i was in Abuja at the time
so i asked her if i could meet the supposed director one on one and pay him directly and even promised to reward her and her friend handsomely if the deal pulls through.

"No" she said abruptly "you pay the money to my account and ill give it to my friend to make the payment. All you have to do is just hope and pray"

Pray... That word. I knew then without a doubt that this Aunty was trying to scam me.

I told her "Aunty please dont be angry, i know you mean well for my future and want me to get a good job in NNPC but right now I've already paid part payment for another job somewhere and i wouldn't want to invest in two places at once" That wasnt true, i just had to get her off my tail once and for all. She was shocked. She angrily cut the call. She wanted to finesse her brother out of some cash using my future, what happens when the real slot comes around. Would i expect him to pay twice?

Her mum (mil) called me and started blasting me. Saying I'm feeling too big to be helped and her daughter was only trying to help me and now she never wanted to have anything to do with me again. That i should call her daughter and take the offer so that peace would reign. I didnt. Even my hubby blamed me and i couldn't even open my mouth to tell anyone i thought the whole setup was a scam. That's such a big accusation to make. The family dislike for me grew worse because of that incident.

Please did i do wrong?



Modified: For those asking me to talk to hubby, ofcourse i did but he genuinely believes his sister was trying to help and since i couldnt point out outright that the whole thing smelt of scam, hr thinks i rejected the offer because of pride. But i know better. It didnt cause serious issue between us though.

see lawyer ooo people that promised to uphold the law is coming here without shame to talk about job payments, no wonder Lifeless BUHARI called us lazy, youth,... don't go a study one biznes carefully and support your hubby be here forming graduate

meetme01:
When you sensed scam. You should have at least informed your husband without telling him what you suspected. It's going to be your husband that would pay, I believe? If so, you just tell your husband to ask questions to make sure she's (your sis in law) not being given fake information since she's also a third party. If it results in scam, the issue will die within the family and you won't be boxed into a corner. You shot yourself by being too smart.

She didn't do anything wrong because it was her decision to make and she did exactly that. Case closed. The hubby can now go ahead and pay his sister 500k.
Amya

Amiraqfaith:
No be naija again... My sister tread carefully

Babe you look beautiful oo hope the compound you took is the shot is for your father...cos I hate girls that deceive me with people property oo