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My Younger Sister Or My Boss Daughter ?? - Family - Nairaland

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My Younger Sister Or My Boss Daughter ?? by Naira235: 5:46pm On Jun 19, 2020
Hi Everyone,
I have been paying high money for childcare here in UK and its giving me a second thought. My husband is a medical doctor and I work as a nurse for half days in a week, so we don't have to work all day and time to be financially okay as this is our first child and she is just 8 months old.

I can only afford to sponsor one person for MSc and the person has to be assisting me in childcare as a compensation.

I have a younger sister whom I am 6 years older than, she is a graduate but not currently working. She is a spoilt child been the last born and I am the first born. I found it very difficult to control her as an elder sister while in Nigeria. She is a graduate, and she is tired of Nigeria, she is also a burden on my parents as she has been living and feeding on them. Most times I send them money she spends 80% of it for herself and she is been treated as a pet been last child. I am afraid I won't be able to control her as my sister when she comes over.

I have another lady, she was the daughter of my boss where I was learning Tailoring in Nigeria. She and her mother were so respectful and caring. They are very poor and have no support anywhere so I am thinking of inviting her over for her MSc abroad and to also be taking care of my child for few days in return for her school fees.
Note : that is aside from their 20 hours work per week allowed on their student visa, so they can also work and have money.

The childcare is just few days in a week from 8am to 2pm. And I am hopeful it won't affect their studies.

Who is the right person to invite? Please I need your advice . Thanks all

1 Like 1 Share

Re: My Younger Sister Or My Boss Daughter ?? by HarunaWest(m): 5:58pm On Jun 19, 2020
Invite the latter.
Like you said, your sis is spoilt. That means you wouldn't be able to direct her.
But the former, it's more like a contract agreement. So she will conform to terms.
Cheers

12 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Younger Sister Or My Boss Daughter ?? by Heartbender: 5:59pm On Jun 19, 2020
Invite who won't give you problems and won't make you live with regrets
Naira235:
Hi Everyone,
I have been paying high money for childcare here in UK and its giving me a second thought.
I can only afford to sponsor one person for MSc and the person has to be assisting me in childcare as a compensation.

I have a younger sister whom I am 6 years older than, she is a graduate but not currently working. She is a spoilt child been the last born and I am the first born. I found it very difficult to control her as an elder sister while in Nigeria. She is a graduate, and she is tired of Nigeria, she is also a burden on my parents as she has been living and feeding on them. Most times I send them money she spends 80% of it for herself and she is been treated as a pet been last child. I am afraid I won't be able to control her as my sister when she comes over.

I have another lady, she was the daughter of my boss when I was learning Tailoring in Nigeria. She and her mother were so respectful and caring. They are very poor and have no support anywhere so I am thinking of inviting her over for her MSc abroad and to also be taking care of my child for few days in return for her school fees.
Note : that is aside from their 20 hours work per week allowed on their student visa, so they can also work and have money.

The childcare is just few days in a week from 8am to 2pm. And I am hopeful it won't affect their studies.

Who is the right person to invite? Please I need your advice . Thanks all

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Younger Sister Or My Boss Daughter ?? by 2goodbobo(m): 6:00pm On Jun 19, 2020
Invite the Daughter of your former Boss.

3 Likes

Re: My Younger Sister Or My Boss Daughter ?? by annex1: 6:02pm On Jun 19, 2020
From all you've explained. Well, your former boss's daughter would be the perfect fit.

But on side ask yourself; if your former boss was in your position. Would she choose you or her own blood - sister?

Best of luck!

16 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Younger Sister Or My Boss Daughter ?? by duduade: 6:03pm On Jun 19, 2020
The daughter of your boss so you can have peace of mind... Not your sister who is obviously synonymous with piece of mind
Re: My Younger Sister Or My Boss Daughter ?? by donbachi(m): 6:03pm On Jun 19, 2020
Ur sis would have been a better choice..but she fit leave ur child for house go groove for pubs and ice-cream parlour..as for ur daughter,how much do u know her,in character.to avoid someone sexually abusing ur child...on a second thought,carry ur sis.

2 Likes

Re: My Younger Sister Or My Boss Daughter ?? by yvelchstores(f): 6:05pm On Jun 19, 2020
2goodbobo:
Invite the Daughter of your former Boss.
seconded.

1 Like

Re: My Younger Sister Or My Boss Daughter ?? by Nobody: 6:18pm On Jun 19, 2020
Hmmm, tough decision you've got there.
Re: My Younger Sister Or My Boss Daughter ?? by Naira235: 6:38pm On Jun 19, 2020
annex1:
From all you've explained. Well, your former boss's daughter would be the perfect fit.

But on side ask yourself; if your former boss was in your position. Would she choose you or her own blood - sister?

Best of luck!
thanks. That same question has been on my mind too. I don't know what will be my parents reaction if I ever mention to them that my boss daughter was invited. I am planning of doing it as a secret without informing my family, but again... I am scared of what might happen later on.
Re: My Younger Sister Or My Boss Daughter ?? by Naira235: 6:40pm On Jun 19, 2020
donbachi:
Ur sis would have been a better choice..but she fit leave ur child for house go groove for pubs and ice-cream parlour..as for ur daughter,how much do u know her,in character.to avoid someone sexually abusing ur child...on a second thought,carry ur sis.
No, I only met her all through my 3years training in her mom's shop like 8 years ago. The mother and her daughter still called or chat me up often to say hello to me, always asking about me during this pandemic, without asking or demanding for money or anything. My sister only call me whenever they are broke at home or my parents are sick.

1 Like

Re: My Younger Sister Or My Boss Daughter ?? by Naira235: 6:42pm On Jun 19, 2020
HarunaWest:
Invite the latter.
Like you said, your sis is spoilt. That means you wouldn't be able to direct her.
But the former, it's more like a contract agreement. So she will conform to terms.
Cheers
Thanks for your advice. I think I will go by this advice. It's a contract and my boss daughter will conform more to it than my sister.

1 Like

Re: My Younger Sister Or My Boss Daughter ?? by Sleekbaby(f): 6:49pm On Jun 19, 2020
Honestly, this is a tough decision to take but for me, I will go for my sister, make the terms clear to her and see her reaction. Blood is thicker than water

4 Likes

Re: My Younger Sister Or My Boss Daughter ?? by LilMissFavvy(f): 6:51pm On Jun 19, 2020
Pick the humble girl and forget your sister, it's better not to let your parent/sister know, otherwise they will feel bad. Last born ''syndrome'' isn't a joke o, most last borns have been over pampered and they can hardly cope with hard work.......most especially the ones from well - to-do backgrounds. Remember nanny work requires patience.

5 Likes

Re: My Younger Sister Or My Boss Daughter ?? by Naira235: 7:05pm On Jun 19, 2020
LilMissFavvy:
Pick the humble girl and forget your sister, it's better not to let your parent/sister know, otherwise they will feel bad. Last born ''syndrome'' isn't a joke o, most last borns have been over pampered and they can hardly cope with hard work.......most especially the ones from well - to-do backgrounds. Remember nanny work requires patience.
thanks. I will hide the whole thing from my parents. Last born are always over pampered and most doesn't have what it takes to work for their family.
Re: My Younger Sister Or My Boss Daughter ?? by donbachi(m): 7:23pm On Jun 19, 2020
Naira235:
No, I only met her all through my 3years training in her mom's shop like 8 years ago. The mother and her daughter still called or chat me up often to say hello to me, always asking about me during this pandemic, without asking or demanding for money or anything. My sister only call me whenever they are broke at home or my parents are sick.
inlaws loading

1 Like

Re: My Younger Sister Or My Boss Daughter ?? by rosy1992(f): 7:26pm On Jun 19, 2020
blood is thicker than water, never trust a stranger.

8 Likes

Re: My Younger Sister Or My Boss Daughter ?? by Naira235: 7:30pm On Jun 19, 2020
donbachi:
inlaws loading
Please how do you mean?
Re: My Younger Sister Or My Boss Daughter ?? by merieam16(f): 7:36pm On Jun 19, 2020
invite ur sister. help her first den u can invite ur bosses daughter later.

if it were ur child would u av thought of invitin sum1 else

3 Likes

Re: My Younger Sister Or My Boss Daughter ?? by donbachi(m): 7:44pm On Jun 19, 2020
Naira235:
Please how do you mean?
As already stated...may GOD help u,in ur decision making.

1 Like

Re: My Younger Sister Or My Boss Daughter ?? by traihit: 8:07pm On Jun 19, 2020
This is really a tough decision but first of all, ensure your decision is the one you won't want to hide any facts about if the need arises in the future. It's not easy to dismiss one's blood and it's not easy to turn a blind eye to someone who'd definitely appreciate help. Except your sister is not enthusiastic about having msc or you really can't trust her at all, that's the only time you can go for your former boss' daughter. BTW, you don't know if the lady will turn to something else once she's settled in the UK and sometimes, the devil you know is better than a strange angel.

10 Likes

Re: My Younger Sister Or My Boss Daughter ?? by Queenslander(f): 8:11pm On Jun 19, 2020
Invite your sister.. Family comes first! Say in the future you ever fall.. They will be there to pick you up...

9 Likes

Re: My Younger Sister Or My Boss Daughter ?? by Nopanties: 8:21pm On Jun 19, 2020
Naira235:
Hi Everyone,
I have been paying high money for childcare here in UK and its giving me a second thought. My husband is a medical doctor and I work as a nurse for half days in a week, so we don't have to work all day and time to be financially okay as this is our first child and she is just 8 months old.

I can only afford to sponsor one person for MSc and the person has to be assisting me in childcare as a compensation.

I have a younger sister whom I am 6 years older than, she is a graduate but not currently working. She is a spoilt child been the last born and I am the first born. I found it very difficult to control her as an elder sister while in Nigeria. She is a graduate, and she is tired of Nigeria, she is also a burden on my parents as she has been living and feeding on them. Most times I send them money she spends 80% of it for herself and she is been treated as a pet been last child. I am afraid I won't be able to control her as my sister when she comes over.

I have another lady, she was the daughter of my boss where I was learning Tailoring in Nigeria. She and her mother were so respectful and caring. They are very poor and have no support anywhere so I am thinking of inviting her over for her MSc abroad and to also be taking care of my child for few days in return for her school fees.
Note : that is aside from their 20 hours work per week allowed on their student visa, so they can also work and have money.

The childcare is just few days in a week from 8am to 2pm. And I am hopeful it won't affect their studies.

Who is the right person to invite? Please I need your advice . Thanks all
One day, your husband or son will chose to help that your neighbour daughter instead of you. They will tell you "You're too authoritative". I wonder what kind of parents raised u guys... Karma

5 Likes

Re: My Younger Sister Or My Boss Daughter ?? by Ayodejewel(f): 8:58pm On Jun 19, 2020
This is a strong decision to make. I must commend that you have a good heart, for you to have thought of your boss's daughter. Pls, help that lady and her family won't ever forget the great seed you've sown into their lives. Moreover, she'll definitely help you with your child since you already know the kind of person she is.
For your sister, truth be told, you won't be able to control her in the UK. I think what you can do is first send her some money to start her MSC here in Nigeria before you make arrangements for the other lady without letting your family know about it because it might cos hatred or bitterness in the family.

4 Likes

Re: My Younger Sister Or My Boss Daughter ?? by Ogeneigbo1: 9:23pm On Jun 19, 2020
Naira235:
Hi Everyone,
I have been paying high money for childcare here in UK and its giving me a second thought. My husband is a medical doctor and I work as a nurse for half days in a week, so we don't have to work all day and time to be financially okay as this is our first child and she is just 8 months old.

I can only afford to sponsor one person for MSc and the person has to be assisting me in childcare as a compensation.

I have a younger sister whom I am 6 years older than, she is a graduate but not currently working. She is a spoilt child been the last born and I am the first born. I found it very difficult to control her as an elder sister while in Nigeria. She is a graduate, and she is tired of Nigeria, she is also a burden on my parents as she has been living and feeding on them. Most times I send them money she spends 80% of it for herself and she is been treated as a pet been last child. I am afraid I won't be able to control her as my sister when she comes over.

I have another lady, she was the daughter of my boss where I was learning Tailoring in Nigeria. She and her mother were so respectful and caring. They are very poor and have no support anywhere so I am thinking of inviting her over for her MSc abroad and to also be taking care of my child for few days in return for her school fees.
Note : that is aside from their 20 hours work per week allowed on their student visa, so they can also work and have money.

The childcare is just few days in a week from 8am to 2pm. And I am hopeful it won't affect their studies.

Who is the right person to invite? Please I need your advice . Thanks all

This is No though decision.
Invite your sister.
Charity begins at home we all always say.

You cannot leave your blood sister and invite a total stranger.you said earlier that your sister wants to come over.

It is your responsibility to invite her over.

Your sister cannot leave her niece or nephew unattended to or exposed to danger.

If you cannot invite your sister, then invite your mum.
A stranger is a stranger, your blood is your blood.

When you came to learn the trade back then,was it free of charge.

Your parents trained you and prayed for you to succeed so that you can extend the love towards your siblings.i bet you that they won't be happy to hear about your plans.

Unless you are planning to use the poor girl as a slave and I tell you that it Will also backfire.

22 Likes

Re: My Younger Sister Or My Boss Daughter ?? by nuelyoyo(m): 9:47pm On Jun 19, 2020
Invite your former boss's daughter. Over familiarity between you and your sister would not make her deliver as expected.

1 Like

Re: My Younger Sister Or My Boss Daughter ?? by Think9ja(m): 10:04pm On Jun 19, 2020
They are all telling you to do what they themselves can't do. That's the situation with Nigerians

For me, if I can't invite both of them, then I will find someone in that country to do that job for me. But I'm never picking anybody over my own flesh and blood.

I cannot pick someone ahead of my sister simply because my sister is a "spoilt" child. This is not a government affair where people will say you're being nepotic, this is strictly a family affair and family members should be considered first.

No matter how "spoilt" your sister is, I don't think she'll abandon her niece whenever she needs her.

It's not as if your sister is a criminal or a loose girl. Her problem is common with most last borns due to too much pampering.
What you just need to do is to present your terms and conditions to her before she applies for visa.

If your sister finds out that you pick this lady over her, she'll never forgive you.

If you feel you want to help your former bosses' daughter for what her mum did for you, credit her account let her start something here.

Besides, that same girl can change once she steps into that country.

Our problem in this country is that we like telling others to do what we ourselves can't do.

Family first abeg.

12 Likes

Re: My Younger Sister Or My Boss Daughter ?? by kcij(f): 10:06pm On Jun 19, 2020
How is dis a tough decision... How did u even think of inviting another person instead of ur own blood.. Do u think ur sis Wil ever abandon her niece... Also think of child molestation and having a co wife

Peace

6 Likes

Re: My Younger Sister Or My Boss Daughter ?? by kcij(f): 10:08pm On Jun 19, 2020
How is dis a tough decision... How did u even think of inviting another person instead of ur own blood.. Do u think ur sis Wil ever abandon her niece... Also think of child molestation and having a co wife... Pls don't deny ur sis dis golden opportunity

Peace

1 Like

Re: My Younger Sister Or My Boss Daughter ?? by kcij(f): 10:09pm On Jun 19, 2020
Nnaa eehh how is dis a tough decision to make. .. How did u even think of inviting another person instead of ur own blood.. Do u think ur sis Wil ever abandon her niece... Also think of child molestation and having a co wife... Pls don't deny ur sis dis golden opportunity

Peace

2 Likes

Re: My Younger Sister Or My Boss Daughter ?? by xband: 10:09pm On Jun 19, 2020
Do you know that, if that stranger hurts you tomorrow you will feel it.

But if your sister hurt you tomorrow, you wouldn't feel because she is your sister.

Better help your sister oh.

2 Likes

Re: My Younger Sister Or My Boss Daughter ?? by JONNYSPUTE(m): 10:47pm On Jun 19, 2020
Naira235:
Hi Everyone,
I have been paying high money for childcare here in UK and its giving me a second thought. My husband is a medical doctor and I work as a nurse for half days in a week, so we don't have to work all day and time to be financially okay as this is our first child and she is just 8 months old.

I can only afford to sponsor one person for MSc and the person has to be assisting me in childcare as a compensation.

I have a younger sister whom I am 6 years older than, she is a graduate but not currently working. She is a spoilt child been the last born and I am the first born. I found it very difficult to control her as an elder sister while in Nigeria. She is a graduate, and she is tired of Nigeria, she is also a burden on my parents as she has been living and feeding on them. Most times I send them money she spends 80% of it for herself and she is been treated as a pet been last child. I am afraid I won't be able to control her as my sister when she comes over.

I have another lady, she was the daughter of my boss where I was learning Tailoring in Nigeria. She and her mother were so respectful and caring. They are very poor and have no support anywhere so I am thinking of inviting her over for her MSc abroad and to also be taking care of my child for few days in return for her school fees.
Note : that is aside from their 20 hours work per week allowed on their student visa, so they can also work and have money.

The childcare is just few days in a week from 8am to 2pm. And I am hopeful it won't affect their studies.

Who is the right person to invite? Please I need your advice . Thanks all
....In all you do becareful and pray over it

People do change. Your sister that is wayward now can change to a better person over there while that your boss daughter can change and become arrogant and difficult to control

I will say,you better give your biological sister a chance.

Blood is blood.

Good luck.

8 Likes

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