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Re: H'abroad Through The Eyes Of A Bushman! by Nobody: 5:43pm On Jul 15, 2020
Canny19:
Today is my 5th day in Canada and I'm already bored. This is as a result of the 14 days quarantine order the government asked everyone coming into the country to observe. Failure to comply with this quarantine order can lead to a six months jail time or a fine of 750 thousand dollars... Yeah, you read right.. 750k CAD:that's around 225 million in naira. Even If I sell my entire village plus my village people and the resources therein, I still won't be able to come up with a quarter of that money so I'm jejely respecting myself by staying indoors.

In Nigeria, only the less privileged live in wooden houses, the rich build with bricks or blocks as the case maybe but the reverse is the case here o. Houses are built with fine woods and I must confess they look so so gorgeous inside out. I still do not understand why doors are painted white but they look beautiful.

Nigerians in Canada are indeed very welcoming, I have received a whole lot of calls and texts from fellow Nigerians welcoming me into the country. They not only call, they also offer to help me settle down as quick as possible. One good Samaritan even decided to go a step further by delivering groceries to my door step as a welcome home package...aswear, this is where to be!

BRB... Let me Goan devour the groceries. I will be back!
grin grin
Lol, you too like food

Kudos to the Nigerians over there. Blessed is the hand that giveth, na so u go still welcome people in the near future to Canada grin grin
Hope you are having a nice day & the weather don dey work on ur skin grin

2 Likes

Re: H'abroad Through The Eyes Of A Bushman! by Jayson504(m): 6:01pm On Jul 15, 2020
Nice thread
Re: H'abroad Through The Eyes Of A Bushman! by NiklauseFred(m): 10:15pm On Jul 16, 2020
Hadampson:


No problem bro
I go dey mention you smiley

Wonderful morning to you BTW cool
Re: H'abroad Through The Eyes Of A Bushman! by NiklauseFred(m): 10:15pm On Jul 16, 2020
Hadampson:


No problem bro
I go dey mention you smiley

Wonderful morning to you BTW cool


And me too oo

1 Like

Re: H'abroad Through The Eyes Of A Bushman! by NiklauseFred(m): 10:16pm On Jul 16, 2020
Hadampson:


Make we see Canada through the eyes of the poster wink

One thing is certain, we go make it out of Nigeria

Local man donates 20 speakers and 10 sound amplifiers to this statement.
Re: H'abroad Through The Eyes Of A Bushman! by youngRx(m): 11:30pm On Jul 16, 2020
Canny19:
. inNigeria, only the less privileged live in wooden houses, the rich build with bricks or blocks as the case maybe but the reverse is the case here o


this got me cracking real hard. like seriously, i still cant wrap my head arround why houses in the west are made of wood. is it that sands and cement are scarce over there?? gringrin
Re: H'abroad Through The Eyes Of A Bushman! by Adamkeyj(m): 11:56pm On Jul 16, 2020
this man too don japa Congrat man
Re: H'abroad Through The Eyes Of A Bushman! by lexzi: 12:29pm On Jul 17, 2020
Beautify read!! A good story teller indeed! The last paragraph got me... We will join you soon by God's grace... May Canada favor you Champ!

I'm finally HOME. 10/7/20
Home is where an average person can afford 3 square meals per day. Home is where security is well guaranteed. Home is where there is no huge discrepancy between the rich and the poor. Home is where our resources and funds are not being embezzled by our corrupt leaders . Home is where there are job provisions for graduates. HOME is where there is HOPE!! Home is, home is, home is, home is.................. CANADA
Have a dream and work towards making it a reality.

NB. I wrote IELTS twice just because I don't like to proofread so pls ignore the plenty errors n typos. [/quote]
Re: H'abroad Through The Eyes Of A Bushman! by Canny19: 10:03pm On Jul 17, 2020
youngRx:


this got me cracking real hard. like seriously, i still cant wrap my head arround why houses in the west are made of wood. is it that sands and cement are scarce over there?? gringrin

I wonder too o! Someone can't even drive a simple nail into the wall to hang calender and pastor's pictures like we do in Nigeria grin

12 Likes

Re: H'abroad Through The Eyes Of A Bushman! by Nobody: 10:11pm On Jul 17, 2020
Canny19:


I wonder too o! Someone can't even drive a simple nail into the wall to hang calender and pastor's pictures like we do in Nigeria grin

Abeg update us oooo
grin
Re: H'abroad Through The Eyes Of A Bushman! by Canny19: 10:20pm On Jul 17, 2020
Hello peeps, it's been a week since I got to Canada and the village people I left behind are already saying that I look fresher: I bet they are just interested in inflating my ego so I can remember them when I start earning dollars... They have jonzed though! grin

I have been a law abiding Permanent Resident by deciding to comply with the 14 days quarantine order. I even got a call from a public health official today asking me if I have any flu like symptoms, covid got nothing on me cos my immune system is above par.

Nothing interesting has happened since I arrived cos there's little one can do in quarantine. The weather is getting warmer or should I say I'm getting acclimatized to the cold weather. Against all odds I have started enjoying doing the dishes because of the hot water that runs in the kitchen and everywhere else.

I'm currently putting finishing touches to my resume in order to hit the job market. It's money I came here to make and not to count skyscrapers.

Cheers!

44 Likes 3 Shares

Re: H'abroad Through The Eyes Of A Bushman! by Nobody: 11:54pm On Jul 17, 2020
Canny19:
Hello peeps, it's been a week since I got to Canada and the village people I left behind are already saying that I look fresher: I bet they are just interested in inflating my ego so I can remember them when I start earning dollars... They have jonzed though! grin

I have been a law abiding Permanent Resident by deciding to comply with the 14 days quarantine order. I even got a call from a public health official today asking me if I have any flu like symptoms, covid got nothing on me cos my immune system is above par.

Nothing interesting has happened since I arrived cos there's little one can do in quarantine. The weather is getting warmer or should I say I'm getting acclimatized to the cold weather. Against all odds I have started enjoying doing the dishes because of the hot water that runs in the kitchen and everywhere else.

I'm currently putting finishing touches to my resume in order to hit the job market. It's money I came here to make and not to count skyscrapers.

Cheers!

Stay safe mate
Re: H'abroad Through The Eyes Of A Bushman! by budaatum: 3:12pm On Jul 18, 2020
Canny19:
Hello peeps, it's been a week since I got to Canada and the village people I left behind are already saying that I look fresher: I bet they are just interested in inflating my ego so I can remember them when I start earning dollars... They have jonzed though! grin

I have been a law abiding Permanent Resident by deciding to comply with the 14 days quarantine order. I even got a call from a public health official today asking me if I have any flu like symptoms, covid got nothing on me cos my immune system is above par.

Nothing interesting has happened since I arrived cos there's little one can do in quarantine. The weather is getting warmer or should I say I'm getting acclimatized to the cold weather. Against all odds I have started enjoying doing the dishes because of the hot water that runs in the kitchen and everywhere else.

I'm currently putting finishing touches to my resume in order to hit the job market. It's money I came here to make and not to count skyscrapers.

Cheers!
And you will make plenty money amen, considering this good thread of yours, but you must never forget to inform us bush people of your experiences now you are there please so we don't do village on you.

6 Likes

Re: H'abroad Through The Eyes Of A Bushman! by flyingpig: 4:33pm On Jul 18, 2020
Canny19:


I wonder too o! Someone can't even drive a simple nail into the wall to hang calender and pastor's pictures like we do in Nigeria grin
Lmao grin
Re: H'abroad Through The Eyes Of A Bushman! by flyingpig: 4:35pm On Jul 18, 2020
budaatum:

[s]And you will make plenty money amen, considering this good thread of yours, but you must never forget to inform us bush people of your experiences now you are there please so we don't do village on you[/s].
sharap you're in america grin
Re: H'abroad Through The Eyes Of A Bushman! by Dangrace01: 6:01pm On Jul 18, 2020
God no go shame us
Re: H'abroad Through The Eyes Of A Bushman! by Hadampson(m): 6:33pm On Jul 18, 2020
skylane:
hadampson my niggi I sight you, Germany we must go but Na only me? but this op Na commedian

Maximum respect boss smiley

Op na ogbonge comedian grin
Re: H'abroad Through The Eyes Of A Bushman! by Hadampson(m): 6:45pm On Jul 18, 2020
NiklauseFred:


Local man donates 20 speakers and 10 sound amplifiers to this statement.

Make sense wink

1 Like

Re: H'abroad Through The Eyes Of A Bushman! by Hadampson(m): 6:47pm On Jul 18, 2020
NiklauseFred:



And me too oo

We gather dey together bro wink
Re: H'abroad Through The Eyes Of A Bushman! by safex(m): 9:26pm On Jul 18, 2020
youngRx:


this got me cracking real hard. like seriously, i still cant wrap my head arround why houses in the west are made of wood. is it that sands and cement are scarce over there?? gringrin
It's actually because of the all-year cold
Re: H'abroad Through The Eyes Of A Bushman! by NiklauseFred(m): 10:43pm On Jul 18, 2020
Canny19:
Hello peeps, it's been a week since I got to Canada and the village people I left behind are already saying that I look fresher: I bet they are just interested in inflating my ego so I can remember them when I start earning dollars... They have jonzed though! grin

I have been a law abiding Permanent Resident by deciding to comply with the 14 days quarantine order. I even got a call from a public health official today asking me if I have any flu like symptoms, covid got nothing on me cos my immune system is above par.

Nothing interesting has happened since I arrived cos there's little one can do in quarantine. The weather is getting warmer or should I say I'm getting acclimatized to the cold weather. Against all odds I have started enjoying doing the dishes because of the hot water that runs in the kitchen and everywhere else.

I'm currently putting finishing touches to my resume in order to hit the job market. It's money I came here to make and not to count skyscrapers.

Cheers!

Boss we are salivating for more updates oo
Hit us!
Re: H'abroad Through The Eyes Of A Bushman! by vhuqnl(m): 11:11pm On Jul 18, 2020
Savagethe21st:
so engaging and interesting. Ride on bro and best of luck
You again.
Re: H'abroad Through The Eyes Of A Bushman! by vhuqnl(m): 11:12pm On Jul 18, 2020
deybholar:
Hahahahaha, this is too funny. You even had to add 'H factor' to the topic grin . No be only H'abroad cheesy

What the hell is H factor? I hate seeing the phrase.
Why don't you say Americans have R factor and demonize them?
I'm not attacking you, just hate what ai don't like seeing.
Re: H'abroad Through The Eyes Of A Bushman! by vhuqnl(m): 11:13pm On Jul 18, 2020
collinsuchendu:
In block => EUROPE OR NOTHING
Nairaland can make someone hate Europe. They demonize the place

1 Like

Re: H'abroad Through The Eyes Of A Bushman! by Nobody: 7:02am On Jul 19, 2020
vhuqnl:

Nairaland can make someone hate Europe. They demonize the place

Exactly bro. But they'd rather die there than comeback home

1 Like

Re: H'abroad Through The Eyes Of A Bushman! by CrystalMax: 6:24pm On Jul 22, 2020
Canny19:
The last leg to Edmonton was rough, the turbulence was much. I began ti wonder what was happening. Even the longer flights from cotonou to Addis then from Addis to Toronto didn't suffer a turbulence this much. The cute lady beside me slept for the better part of the journey while I was finding it hard to sleep. I was calm tho cos I got TCC (travel clearance certificate) from my village ppl and they already promised not to follow me to Canada. So I had nothing to worry about.

Landed in Edmonton and saw that one of my checked in bags was ripped. I wasn't surprised tho cos the bag had a whole lot of orisirisi and panti foodstuffs.
Stepped out of the airport and was greeted with cold but I decided not to use my jacket, I got shocked when my host came wearing armless and said the weather was warm... Ki lo warm exactly? Are you people playing me ni? It was at that moment I started dreading winter. As I type this, my jacket is on while people are wearing pants n bra outside my window ��

I'm settling in quite well even tho I'm still in shock how 10pm can be looking like 4pm and 5am be looking like 9am. There's no way one can predict the time by looking outside in this country.

It's time to start 'living life' as opposed to just 'merely existing' in Nigeria

I'm finally HOME. 10/7/20
Home is where an average person can afford 3 square meals per day. Home is where security is well guaranteed. Home is where there is no huge discrepancy between the rich and the poor. Home is where our resources and funds are not being embezzled by our corrupt leaders . Home is where there are job provisions for graduates. HOME is where there is HOPE!! Home is, home is, home is, home is.................. CANADA
Have a dream and work towards making it a reality.

NB. I wrote IELTS twice just because I don't like to proofread so pls ignore the plenty errors n typos.
I fell in love with you already.
You are a good writer. From "Laccident" to TCC from your village people, bros...You are such a vibe!
Thanks for making me laugh hard.
I wish you all the best in Cannie.
God bless your new HOME grin grin grin

3 Likes

Re: H'abroad Through The Eyes Of A Bushman! by CrystalMax: 6:37pm On Jul 22, 2020
Canny19:
Thanks everyone. I will update this thread as much I can in a bid to see Canada thru my eyes.
Let's fire on!


My first canny experience happened in the washroom at Toronto Pearson International Airport. I was waiting for my last leg at the airport, I felt pressed so I made my way to the washroom. I went in with my sanitizer with the hope of Sanitizing the toilet bowl before sitting on it. I got in there and realized that it was my sanitizer that needed to be sanitized by the toilet bowl cos it was looking cleaner than crystals. As if that wasn't enough, I finished the doings, stood up and the toilet flushed automatically ... Like really... Who asked you? I wasn't sure how it knew I was done .. That's how I used the next 5 minutes looking for the sensor on the toilet bowl o. Finally found it and I decided to trick it by running my palm over the censor and the toilet flushed again.... That's how I won the cold war between myself and the toilet bowl in the washroom o. This Canada ehn.... I must explore
I will like to meet you some day soon @Canny19
You are such a vibe!.
A Very funny man.
"Who asked you?" grin grin grin
Re: H'abroad Through The Eyes Of A Bushman! by Nobody: 6:25pm On Jul 23, 2020
Canny19 hope you're doing good? Abeg update na with pictures
Re: H'abroad Through The Eyes Of A Bushman! by popizaino(m): 10:05pm On Jul 23, 2020
I don rent apartment for here .

OP is just hilarious with this village people thingy and such a good writer as well.
Re: H'abroad Through The Eyes Of A Bushman! by Canny19: 7:41am On Jul 25, 2020
Yaaaaaaay, quarantine is finally over and I'm covid free. It's totally not fun to be banished away from the world for 14 long days. To celebrate my freedom from captivity, I decided to step out to explore the city. Before stepping out, I called a friend to properly school me in the art of using the city buses so as not to get lost or meet myself in Nigeria. I got a bus pass, noted all the places I needed to go and stepped out. I hopped in a bus and it felt like I was inside a plane with 4 tyres. The interior was clean and serene, social distancing was observed unlike BRTs in lagos where we fight and push just to board the bus to stand with one leg for the entire duration of the trip. The first thing I noticed is the politeness of the passengers, people alighted from the bus with a thank you to the bus driver...in my head I began to wonder if the bus driver was volunteering or getting paid for his services cos saying thank you to a commercial bus driver is alien to me.

So I finally got to the bus station and joined others in saying thank you before alighting, I needed to catch another bus so I had to walk across the bus station to another terminal. While walking, I was faced with 4 doors to open..... To open ordinary door com turn herculean task. There was no pull/push on the doors that's how I got confused o but as a proper Nigerian I decided to rely on my strength instead of asking questions, I began to push the doors with all my strength... Pushed one.. Pushed two.. Pushed three and the last door decided not to yield to my strength so I got stuck. Unknown to me, some whites were coming at my back already disturbed by the way I was disgracing my family. Immediately I noticed their glare I quickly reached for my phone and placed it on my ears like a call came in. While at that, I patiently took notice of how they opened the door. Apparently, there were sensors at the side of the doors that I only needed to wave to in order for them to open... Chai see how I disgraced myself.... I angrily went back to the first door and started waving at the sensors and the doors started opening o... I felt like Alibaba opening sesame.


Finally, I got to the mall where I needed to get a screen protector for my new phone since some 'unscrupulous elements' here already phone shamed me cos of my camera. I met an Indian at a phone accessories shop and asked him for a glass screen protector. He told me he doesn't have a glass screen protector but he has a better one, so I asked him to fix me the 'better one' while I look around the mall. Getting back, he handed my the phone and I saw that he has covered the screen with a nylon protector... Bros are you whining me ni... How's this better than glass protector? He sha started explaining things about anti scratch that I didn't understand, I sha kept calm cos I didn't want to cause a scene on my first day out.. I angrily asked for the price and he said 30 dolls.... 30 kini... I sharply converted it to naira in my head and that was when I knew a scene was inevitable.... How can I pay over 8k for a nylon protector? Even computer village boys dare not try to scam me like this... Scammer come turn scamee... That's how I told him to remove his nylon that I'm not doing again o... After plenty talks, he agreed 15 dolls which I reluctantly paid. Long story short sha, I have marked his face...we will meet on the street and turn the matter to 'two fighting' cos the thing pain me no be small... Nylon protector I normally buy for 400 naira come turn 4k.

To cool off the anger and wait for my friend, I made my way to the much talked about Tim Hortons hoping to buy whatever they sell there. There, I met a Chinese who was speaking like it's against the law to speak loud.... I sha calmed down to explain to him how hungry I was and he told me to speak no more that he got me. Twinkle of an eye, this man brought a big cup of coffee and one tiny doughnut to go with it. 'sir, I thought you said you got me.. You didn't 'got' me rarara o...
Whats this na.... I never said I was thirsty na, it's hunger that is catching me' how can u bring a big bucket of coffee instead of a big doughnut. As if that wasn't enough, the Chinese decided to hand me sachets of sugar and milk to mix myself instead of mixing it himself. The milk I was given didn't even change the colour of the coffee after emptying them in. I sha took my L and marked the guy's face too.

One last thing, I really do not understand o.. Id El kabir is almost here and I still haven't seen rams dragged around....No ram fights ..no anything abi Canadians don't celebrate ileya ni. Is this how I'm going to miss Id El kabir's meat this year? cry The only animal these whites keep dragging around are dogs? They should just thank their stars that I'm not from calabar sha... Coman see dogs looking all fleshy n meaty, if only they know what their peers go thru in the hands of Calabarians. God dey!

It's indeed good to be outside again and it's already looking like the grasses are truly greener on this side o, time will tell sha.


Here are some pictures for you

43 Likes 4 Shares

Re: H'abroad Through The Eyes Of A Bushman! by Spanishmilf(m): 8:49am On Jul 25, 2020
Lmaoooo
Nice

1 Like

Re: H'abroad Through The Eyes Of A Bushman! by Nobody: 9:00am On Jul 25, 2020
Canny19:
Yaaaaaaay, quarantine is finally over and I'm covid free. It's totally not fun to be banished away from the world for 14 long days. To celebrate my freedom from captivity, I decided to step out to explore the city. Before stepping out, I called a friend to properly school me in the art of using the city buses so as not to get lost or meet myself in Nigeria. I got a bus pass, noted all the places I needed to go and stepped out. I hopped in a bus and it felt like I was inside a plane with 4 tyres. The interior was clean and serene, social distancing was observed unlike BRTs in lagos where we fight and push just to board the bus to stand with one leg for the entire duration of the trip. The first thing I noticed is the politeness of the passengers, people alighted from the bus with a thank you to the bus driver...in my head I began to wonder if the bus driver was volunteering or getting paid for his services cos saying thank you to a commercial bus driver is alien to me.

So I finally got to the bus station and joined others in saying thank you before alighting, I needed to catch another bus so I had to walk across the bus station to another terminal. While walking, I was faced with 4 doors to open..... To open ordinary door com turn herculean task. There was no pull/push on the doors that's how I got confused o but as a proper Nigerian I decided to rely on my strength instead of asking questions, I began to push the doors with all my strength... Pushed one.. Pushed two.. Pushed three and the last door decided not to yield to my strength so I got stuck. Unknown to me, some whites were coming at my back already disturbed by the way I was disgracing my family. Immediately I noticed their glare I quickly reached for my phone and placed it on my ears like a call came in. While at that, I patiently took notice of how they opened the door. Apparently, there were sensors at the side of the doors that I only needed to wave to in order for them to open... Chai see how I disgraced myself.... I angrily went back to the first door and started waving at the sensors and the doors started opening o... I felt like Alibaba opening sesame.


Finally, I got to the mall where I needed to get a screen protector for my new phone since some 'unscrupulous elements' here already phone shamed me cos of my camera. I met an Indian at a phone accessories shop and asked him for a glass screen protector. He told me he doesn't have a glass screen protector but he has a better one, so I asked him to fix me the 'better one' while I look around the mall. Getting back, he handed my the phone and I saw that he has covered the screen with a nylon protector... Bros are you whining me ni... How's this better than glass protector? He sha started explaining things about anti scratch that I didn't understand, I sha kept calm cos I didn't want to cause a scene on my first day out.. I angrily asked for the price and he said 30 dolls.... 30 kini... I sharply converted it to naira in my head and that was when I knew a scene was inevitable.... How can I pay over 8k for a nylon protector? Even computer village boys dare not try to scam me like this... Scammer come turn scamee... That's how I told him to remove his nylon that I'm not doing again o... After plenty talks, he agreed 15 dolls which I reluctantly paid. Long story short sha, I have marked his face...we will meet on the street and turn the matter to 'two fighting' cos the thing pain me no be small... Nylon protector I normally buy for 400 naira come turn 4k.

To cool off the anger and wait for my friend, I made my way to the much talked about Tim Hortons hoping to buy whatever they sell there. There, I met a Chinese who was speaking like it's against the law to speak loud.... I sha calmed down to explain to him how hungry I was and he told me to speak no more that he got me. Twinkle of an eye, this man brought a big cup of coffee and one tiny doughnut to go with it. 'sir, I thought you said you got me.. You didn't 'got' me rarara o...
Whats this na.... I never said I was thirsty na, it's hunger that is catching me' how can u bring a big bucket of coffee instead of a big doughnut. As if that wasn't enough, the Chinese decided to hand me sachets of sugar and milk to mix myself instead of mixing it himself. The milk I was given didn't even change the colour of the coffee after emptying them in. I sha took my L and marked the guy's face too.

One last thing, I really do not understand o.. Id El kabir is almost here and I still haven't seen rams dragged around....No ram fights ..no anything abi Canadians don't celebrate ileya ni. Is this how I'm going to miss Id El kabir's meat this year? cry The only animal these whites keep dragging around are dogs? They should just thank their stars that I'm not from calabar sha... Coman see dogs looking all fleshy n meaty, if only they know what their peers go thru in the hands of Calabarians. God dey!

It's indeed good to be outside again and it's already looking like the grasses are truly greener on this side o, time will tell sha.


Here are some pictures for you


Bosss abeg go dey do comedy
I don lafff tire here one girl pass by and I was laughing she just dey observe me say Abi this guy don craze ni lol grin
Nice write boss ✌️

8 Likes

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