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Advice Needed: Should I Go Ahead With The Introduction - Romance (3) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / Advice Needed: Should I Go Ahead With The Introduction (44348 Views)

Groom Disappears On His Wedding Day, Bride Goes Ahead With The Event In U.K / My Fiancee Betrayed Me: Should I Go Ahead With The Marriage Plans? / Advice Needed.. Should I Quit Or Remain In This Kind Of Relationship (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Advice Needed: Should I Go Ahead With The Introduction by deltateam: 2:17pm On Aug 02, 2020
cana882:
Since you’ve refused to mention any good attribute that your fiancée possess, we’ll advise you on exactly what you want to hear from us: dump her.

Goat


Which other good attribute do you seek from a woman that told you point blank that she will leave you once you lack money even before the marriage?

That alone will overshadow any good attributes because it paints her as a "fair weather biatch".

You won't even achieve erection before her as your mind lacks peace and she's not loyal.


It's unfortunate many men are only looking at big yansh and breasts.

No wonder divorce keeps increasing..

2 Likes

Re: Advice Needed: Should I Go Ahead With The Introduction by Adedotguy: 2:17pm On Aug 02, 2020
angry
Re: Advice Needed: Should I Go Ahead With The Introduction by Lamasta(m): 2:23pm On Aug 02, 2020
SmartPolician:


How do you know that God approved or disapproved of your would-be wife?
God speaks to us in different ways for example in Job 33:14 - 18

[14] For God speaketh once, yea twice, yet man perceiveth it not.

[15] In a dream, in a vision of the night, when deep sleep falleth upon men, in slumberings upon the bed;

[16] Then he openeth the ears of men, and sealeth their instruction,

[17] That he may withdraw man from his purpose, and hide pride from man.

[18] He keepeth back his soul from the pit, and his life from perishing by the sword.

Note: You cannot take your marital case to God on your knees in humility and God will not respond to your case to either go ahead or back out...Shalom

1 Like

Re: Advice Needed: Should I Go Ahead With The Introduction by Poseidon000: 2:25pm On Aug 02, 2020
I don't understand why guy's marry women that disrespect and have no regard for them.

That in itself is a red flag that deserve a red card. Just at the nascent of your relationship, you had to deal with hurtful words that register indelible mark in your heart, from a suppose fiancée.

I wonder what that relationship will look like in 10yrs time; probably, Iraq and Iran war front.

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: Advice Needed: Should I Go Ahead With The Introduction by Nobody: 2:28pm On Aug 02, 2020
Assurance001:
Op you have summarized the whole episode with these;
A broken relationship is better than a broken marriage and
The devil you know is better than the angel you don't know.
But note that some women tends to bring good luck while some the opposite after marriage. Why not go on your knees and seek God's direction and if you have made up your mind with your fiancée then introduce her to Bisi since you said you're not in a relationship with her thereby maintaining your relationship with Bisi. Remember buying her gifts once in a while won't be bad.
The best of luck.
Nairalanders may we always meet people that will have positive impact in our lives and let the ones that will wreck us be far from us. Happy Sunday and God bless us all.
"But note that some women tends to bring good luck" don't be deceived luck doesn't exist every effect has a cause.
Re: Advice Needed: Should I Go Ahead With The Introduction by SmartPolician: 2:28pm On Aug 02, 2020
Lamasta:

God speaks to us in different ways for example in Job 33:14 - 18

[14] For God speaketh once, yea twice, yet man perceiveth it not.

[15] In a dream, in a vision of the night, when deep sleep falleth upon men, in slumberings upon the bed;

[16] Then he openeth the ears of men, and sealeth their instruction,

[17] That he may withdraw man from his purpose, and hide pride from man.

[18] He keepeth back his soul from the pit, and his life from perishing by the sword.

Note: You cannot take your marital case to God on your knees in humility and God will not respond to your case to either go ahead or back out...Shalom

I need practical explanation not Bible verses, please
Re: Advice Needed: Should I Go Ahead With The Introduction by Lamasta(m): 2:32pm On Aug 02, 2020
SmartPolician:

I need practical explanation not Bible verses, please
Follow the word of God and you will never regret
Re: Advice Needed: Should I Go Ahead With The Introduction by kingBenedict: 2:32pm On Aug 02, 2020
This story dey confusing... I no get strength to come dey reason anything, settle your problem by yourself...
Re: Advice Needed: Should I Go Ahead With The Introduction by ThatFairGuy1: 2:38pm On Aug 02, 2020
Your response is in the thread with the link below wink

https://www.nairaland.com/6029422/oshogbo-capital-city-state-osun
Re: Advice Needed: Should I Go Ahead With The Introduction by mentored: 2:39pm On Aug 02, 2020
Lisabi01:
Good morning family. I need your advice. This post might be long. Kindly ignore my jargons.

I and my fiancée have been dating for years now (childhood love). 4 years ago, we broke up for like a year due to her infidelity. During that time, I was with different girls who are worse, except a girl (Bisi) who was a friend then, and was in a relationship as at then (I'll come back to this).

Back to 4 years ago, after we (i and my fiancée)broke up, things starts falling in its place, and I started living large. It all ended after we got back together, and I was back to square one. I thought it was because I was still in school, but it continued after school.

I met another girl last year, we were just friends, no strings attached. This girl told me that I have a problem, and that I'm not bothered about it. My response was that we all have different problem and that this was my trying times. She responded saying "is this how your life was few years ago?" She asked me to go out to a pastor and make my own findings. I've never seen this girl prior to this, we just talk on phone.

As per her advice, I went out to seek for a divine solution (I never believed in seeking spiritual solution from a pastor, Alfa or a traditional worshiper, but I did this time around). I was told that when things was good for me, I had a girl that I dated throughout that time, and that I should try and connect her again. I thought about it, and they were actually right. It was when I stopped calling this girl that things went south for me. I told them I don't have any connection with her again and that i can't connect her. I was later told to be observant, and that I'll meet another girl, and that thing will change for me.

Back to my friend, Bisi..... She was in an open relationship. I envied their relationship then, and I was crushing on her secretly ( I and my fiancée wasn't together then). I met Bisi recently and she told me she broke up with her boyfriend. We became friends again, and we started getting closer. She doesn't live in my town, and we don't see at all because I don't have the time. But I noticed she's all I want in a woman, and since I met her, my pocket never runs dry. I don't have that intention of dating her at first until I noticed my pocket.

Now that I'm engaged, my introduction is coming up soon, and my extended family members and my fiancée's are all aware of the date. I should have done the introduction months ago before this pandemic, but my fiancée said some hurtful and hateful words to me which I still remember and I'm still keeping it to myself. She also have some attitudes I've been correcting but never takes to correction.

I know you'll say when I noticed all the above, why can't i bail out? There's a saying : the devil you've known for long is better than an angel you just met. She's that devil I've known for long and she's been known and has the support of family and friends.
You'll also ask: will they live together with us? My answer is so dumb cos I thought I can't find anybody better than her, even though my pocket runs dry. And one of the pastors said things will get better with her.

The dilemma I'm in now is should I put the introduction on hold, or I should go ahead with it for further observation on Bisi, or I should just carry my cross and work things out with my fiancée.... A broken relationship is better than a broken marriage, so they say.

Insults are welcomed, just for me to be a better me.

NB: I'm not in a relationship with Bisi (not her real name)



Anuofia


You want to marry pocket drier when buhari is still the president


You go suffer ooooo

Fainting doesn’t save a family man oooooo


Bros you go suffer oooo


Mtigbo?

2 Likes

Re: Advice Needed: Should I Go Ahead With The Introduction by Nobody: 2:41pm On Aug 02, 2020
Assurance001:
Op you have summarized the whole episode with these;
A broken relationship is better than a broken marriage and
The devil you know is better than the angel you don't know.
But note that some women tends to bring good luck while some the opposite after marriage. Why not go on your knees and seek God's direction and if you have made up your mind with your fiancée then introduce her to Bisi since you said you're not in a relationship with her thereby maintaining your relationship with Bisi. Remember buying her gifts once in a while won't be bad.
The best of luck.
Nairalanders may we always meet people that will have positive impact in our lives and let the ones that will wreck us be far from us. Happy Sunday and God bless us all.
Amen o. A friend to my brother in-law to the uncle of your immediate sister Inlaw's niece is interested in you. What should I tell him? cheesy

1 Like

Re: Advice Needed: Should I Go Ahead With The Introduction by mentored: 2:42pm On Aug 02, 2020
ashatoda:
bros can you listen to yourself speaking? a lady cheated on you when you are in this Naija you now accepted her back only to be planning to leave her here in Naija to travel abroad. guy abeg reason the matter now. I'm not campaigning for Bisi but you need to call on God because this is the hallmark of confusion which could derail your future and lead to regret. so please pray fervently over it but my advice is that ditch that your so called fiancee if she can cheat on you when you are here expect worse when you are not there. moreso she told you she can't live with you in penury abeg I am not saying you will be poor but if things hard for you how certain are you that she will be there for you guy reason your case wella before plunging into a ditch. if you breakup with her family members will rise to fight you but you need to speak to the reasoning of your parents who will be sponsoring you when they are with you then you are covered highlight your fears and worries about this lady and tell them if they will want you to die untimely


Someone who cheated on you in your presence will ultimately become a borehole in your absence

1 Like

Re: Advice Needed: Should I Go Ahead With The Introduction by mentored: 2:45pm On Aug 02, 2020
Lisabi01:
Good morning family. I need your advice. This post might be long. Kindly ignore my jargons.

I and my fiancée have been dating for years now (childhood love). 4 years ago, we broke up for like a year due to her infidelity. During that time, I was with different girls who are worse, except a girl (Bisi) who was a friend then, and was in a relationship as at then (I'll come back to this).

Back to 4 years ago, after we (i and my fiancée)broke up, things starts falling in its place, and I started living large. It all ended after we got back together, and I was back to square one. I thought it was because I was still in school, but it continued after school.

I met another girl last year, we were just friends, no strings attached. This girl told me that I have a problem, and that I'm not bothered about it. My response was that we all have different problem and that this was my trying times. She responded saying "is this how your life was few years ago?" She asked me to go out to a pastor and make my own findings. I've never seen this girl prior to this, we just talk on phone.

As per her advice, I went out to seek for a divine solution (I never believed in seeking spiritual solution from a pastor, Alfa or a traditional worshiper, but I did this time around). I was told that when things was good for me, I had a girl that I dated throughout that time, and that I should try and connect her again. I thought about it, and they were actually right. It was when I stopped calling this girl that things went south for me. I told them I don't have any connection with her again and that i can't connect her. I was later told to be observant, and that I'll meet another girl, and that thing will change for me.

Back to my friend, Bisi..... She was in an open relationship. I envied their relationship then, and I was crushing on her secretly ( I and my fiancée wasn't together then). I met Bisi recently and she told me she broke up with her boyfriend. We became friends again, and we started getting closer. She doesn't live in my town, and we don't see at all because I don't have the time. But I noticed she's all I want in a woman, and since I met her, my pocket never runs dry. I don't have that intention of dating her at first until I noticed my pocket.

Now that I'm engaged, my introduction is coming up soon, and my extended family members and my fiancée's are all aware of the date. I should have done the introduction months ago before this pandemic, but my fiancée said some hurtful and hateful words to me which I still remember and I'm still keeping it to myself. She also have some attitudes I've been correcting but never takes to correction.

I know you'll say when I noticed all the above, why can't i bail out? There's a saying : the devil you've known for long is better than an angel you just met. She's that devil I've known for long and she's been known and has the support of family and friends.
You'll also ask: will they live together with us? My answer is so dumb cos I thought I can't find anybody better than her, even though my pocket runs dry. And one of the pastors said things will get better with her.

The dilemma I'm in now is should I put the introduction on hold, or I should go ahead with it for further observation on Bisi, or I should just carry my cross and work things out with my fiancée.... A broken relationship is better than a broken marriage, so they say.

Insults are welcomed, just for me to be a better me.

NB: I'm not in a relationship with Bisi (not her real name)


Let’s be serious guys


If you want to know that you are on the right path in life, always do this check!!!


Whenever your decision doesn’t depend on what people (Papa, mama, elders, pastors etc) think but on what is right

You have almost arrived walai
Re: Advice Needed: Should I Go Ahead With The Introduction by IJEYdiamond(f): 2:46pm On Aug 02, 2020
My candid advise to all... A broken relationship is surly better than a broken marriage...

It is well with us all....
Re: Advice Needed: Should I Go Ahead With The Introduction by Bewiseedet(m): 2:51pm On Aug 02, 2020
I will never leave any lady who brings me fortune.
Re: Advice Needed: Should I Go Ahead With The Introduction by skillmyman(m): 2:59pm On Aug 02, 2020
Op,
A lady told you that she can't live with you in penury n you are planning to marry her?

Is it not the person that brings you good luck you shld marry?

Marriage does not change anyone. Already done 20yrs in marriage. I will tell you after another 20yrs if people change after marriage.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Advice Needed: Should I Go Ahead With The Introduction by Nobody: 3:00pm On Aug 02, 2020
Some people think that this meeting the right woman stuff is a joke till I heard a white woman say thesame thing.

The lady said that when she was single, any man she was in a good relationship with, started getting rich instantly.

Almost every man have noticed this at one time in life or another.

Some women just carry bad luck come life and one clear trait of these girls is SELFISHNESS.

Marry any woman who likes you and does not think of her well-being over yours. That's the trick.

There is no religion in this one. It's common sense.

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: Advice Needed: Should I Go Ahead With The Introduction by Nobody: 3:10pm On Aug 02, 2020
Lisabi01:
Thanks for the above. I said in the post that she said some hurtful words like she can't live with me in penury. I never considered this. I'm still struggling, and planning to leave this country soon. But my sponsor, ie my parent said my wife should be pregnant before I travel. That's why I'm rushing things before I met Bisi. I'm really confused ma'am

Let me give you a secret.

Since you want to travel, suspend the wedding. Forget, my mum said, my dad said.

The best observer of your life is YOURSELF. Many Mother's out of their selfishness have thrown their children into regrets. Bisi brings you goodluck.

Succeeding abroad is not even as easy, some spend 5 years to make it, some 12 months. You need all the goodluck in your life now.

Don't marry a selfish woman.

1 Like

Re: Advice Needed: Should I Go Ahead With The Introduction by jasman1: 3:13pm On Aug 02, 2020
Looks like you’re too much into spiritual this and that, people in that area are like that , don’t really blaming you, it’s a cultural thing. You met this one, your pocket dries up or spill over. Whoever you will finally marry at this stage is in trouble unless you turn your life around. African pastors and their churches are based on invoking fears on their members. Get a real bible and sincerly pray to God, he’ll hear you and I sincerely wish you well
Re: Advice Needed: Should I Go Ahead With The Introduction by madridsta007(m): 3:27pm On Aug 02, 2020
Lisabi01:
Good morning family. I need your advice. This post might be long. Kindly ignore my jargons.

I and my fiancée have been dating for years now (childhood love). 4 years ago, we broke up for like a year due to her infidelity. During that time, I was with different girls who are worse, except a girl (Bisi) who was a friend then, and was in a relationship as at then (I'll come back to this).

Back to 4 years ago, after we (i and my fiancée)broke up, things starts falling in its place, and I started living large. It all ended after we got back together, and I was back to square one. I thought it was because I was still in school, but it continued after school.

I met another girl last year, we were just friends, no strings attached. This girl told me that I have a problem, and that I'm not bothered about it. My response was that we all have different problem and that this was my trying times. She responded saying "is this how your life was few years ago?" She asked me to go out to a pastor and make my own findings. I've never seen this girl prior to this, we just talk on phone.

As per her advice, I went out to seek for a divine solution (I never believed in seeking spiritual solution from a pastor, Alfa or a traditional worshiper, but I did this time around). I was told that when things was good for me, I had a girl that I dated throughout that time, and that I should try and connect her again. I thought about it, and they were actually right. It was when I stopped calling this girl that things went south for me. I told them I don't have any connection with her again and that i can't connect her. I was later told to be observant, and that I'll meet another girl, and that thing will change for me.

Back to my friend, Bisi..... She was in an open relationship. I envied their relationship then, and I was crushing on her secretly ( I and my fiancée wasn't together then). I met Bisi recently and she told me she broke up with her boyfriend. We became friends again, and we started getting closer. She doesn't live in my town, and we don't see at all because I don't have the time. But I noticed she's all I want in a woman, and since I met her, my pocket never runs dry. I don't have that intention of dating her at first until I noticed my pocket.

Now that I'm engaged, my introduction is coming up soon, and my extended family members and my fiancée's are all aware of the date. I should have done the introduction months ago before this pandemic, but my fiancée said some hurtful and hateful words to me which I still remember and I'm still keeping it to myself. She also have some attitudes I've been correcting but never takes to correction.

I know you'll say when I noticed all the above, why can't i bail out? There's a saying : the devil you've known for long is better than an angel you just met. She's that devil I've known for long and she's been known and has the support of family and friends.
You'll also ask: will they live together with us? My answer is so dumb cos I thought I can't find anybody better than her, even though my pocket runs dry. And one of the pastors said things will get better with her.

The dilemma I'm in now is should I put the introduction on hold, or I should go ahead with it for further observation on Bisi, or I should just carry my cross and work things out with my fiancée.... A broken relationship is better than a broken marriage, so they say.

Insults are welcomed, just for me to be a better me.

NB: I'm not in a relationship with Bisi (not her real name)

Marriage... The biggest decision a man can take.

Can either make you.
Or completely mar you.
Make it with clear, logical eyes, a "logic" that is aligned to the Holy Spirit.
Else..
Re: Advice Needed: Should I Go Ahead With The Introduction by testimony1089(m): 3:31pm On Aug 02, 2020
Bro firstly, never associate anyone to your boom or doom, your destiny is at the totem of ur palm.

Secondly, never marry anyone out of pity or fear, it's better not to marry at all than going in that phase.

Thirdly, never take anything anyone (pastor or alfa) say too serious, most times it's misleading. Pray to God if u believe in him, to guide u in ur decision making. Man faces rise and fall all the time. U challenge ur fall to even rise higher than u have ever been. Believe me even if u marry an angel time like this would come though maybe in another. Strong mindset is d key bro, when challenges come, u challenge it not looking for excuses.

U are totally responsible for boom or doom. I pray God opens ur inner eyes.

1 Like

Re: Advice Needed: Should I Go Ahead With The Introduction by Damian457: 3:38pm On Aug 02, 2020
Honestly you spoke my mind. The girl that have the mind to cheat on her serious bf obviously has no iota of respect for the relationship. Cheating is enough reason to end the relationship for good. The part I didn’t get was breaking up for 1 year and coming back again. Seriously?? Who does that Some guys though


ashatoda:
bros can you listen to yourself speaking? a lady cheated on you when you are in this Naija you now accepted her back only to be planning to leave her here in Naija to travel abroad. guy abeg reason the matter now. I'm not campaigning for Bisi but you need to call on God because this is the hallmark of confusion which could derail your future and lead to regret. so please pray fervently over it but my advice is that ditch that your so called fiancee if she can cheat on you when you are here expect worse when you are not there. moreso she told you she can't live with you in penury abeg I am not saying you will be poor but if things hard for you how certain are you that she will be there for you guy reason your case wella before plunging into a ditch. if you breakup with her family members will rise to fight you but you need to speak to the reasoning of your parents who will be sponsoring you when they are with you then you are covered highlight your fears and worries about this lady and tell them if they will want you to die untimely
Re: Advice Needed: Should I Go Ahead With The Introduction by akaahs(m): 3:39pm On Aug 02, 2020
Assurance001:
Op you have summarized the whole episode with these;
A broken relationship is better than a broken marriage and
The devil you know is better than the angel you don't know.
But note that some women tends to bring good luck while some the opposite after marriage. Why not go on your knees and seek God's direction and if you have made up your mind with your fiancée then introduce her to Bisi since you said you're not in a relationship with her thereby maintaining your relationship with Bisi. Remember buying her gifts once in a while won't be bad.
The best of luck.
Nairalanders may we always meet people that will have positive impact in our lives and let the ones that will wreck us be far from us. Happy Sunday and God bless us all.
Weldon for understanding the story
Re: Advice Needed: Should I Go Ahead With The Introduction by alizma: 3:42pm On Aug 02, 2020
Assurance001:
Op you have summarized the whole episode with these;
A broken relationship is better than a broken marriage and
The devil you know is better than the angel you don't know.
But note that some women tends to bring good luck while some the opposite after marriage. Why not go on your knees and seek God's direction and if you have made up your mind with your fiancée then introduce her to Bisi since you said you're not in a relationship with her thereby maintaining your relationship with Bisi. Remember buying her gifts once in a while won't be bad.
The best of luck.
Nairalanders may we always meet people that will have positive impact in our lives and let the ones that will wreck us be far from us. Happy Sunday and God bless us all.
You put down everything in my mind bit by bit. May God increase your wisdom
Re: Advice Needed: Should I Go Ahead With The Introduction by alizma: 3:44pm On Aug 02, 2020
Lisabi01:
Good morning family. I need your advice. This post might be long. Kindly ignore my jargons.

I and my fiancée have been dating for years now (childhood love). 4 years ago, we broke up for like a year due to her infidelity. During that time, I was with different girls who are worse, except a girl (Bisi) who was a friend then, and was in a relationship as at then (I'll come back to this).

Back to 4 years ago, after we (i and my fiancée)broke up, things starts falling in its place, and I started living large. It all ended after we got back together, and I was back to square one. I thought it was because I was still in school, but it continued after school.

I met another girl last year, we were just friends, no strings attached. This girl told me that I have a problem, and that I'm not bothered about it. My response was that we all have different problem and that this was my trying times. She responded saying "is this how your life was few years ago?" She asked me to go out to a pastor and make my own findings. I've never seen this girl prior to this, we just talk on phone.

As per her advice, I went out to seek for a divine solution (I never believed in seeking spiritual solution from a pastor, Alfa or a traditional worshiper, but I did this time around). I was told that when things was good for me, I had a girl that I dated throughout that time, and that I should try and connect her again. I thought about it, and they were actually right. It was when I stopped calling this girl that things went south for me. I told them I don't have any connection with her again and that i can't connect her. I was later told to be observant, and that I'll meet another girl, and that thing will change for me.

Back to my friend, Bisi..... She was in an open relationship. I envied their relationship then, and I was crushing on her secretly ( I and my fiancée wasn't together then). I met Bisi recently and she told me she broke up with her boyfriend. We became friends again, and we started getting closer. She doesn't live in my town, and we don't see at all because I don't have the time. But I noticed she's all I want in a woman, and since I met her, my pocket never runs dry. I don't have that intention of dating her at first until I noticed my pocket.

Now that I'm engaged, my introduction is coming up soon, and my extended family members and my fiancée's are all aware of the date. I should have done the introduction months ago before this pandemic, but my fiancée said some hurtful and hateful words to me which I still remember and I'm still keeping it to myself. She also have some attitudes I've been correcting but never takes to correction.

I know you'll say when I noticed all the above, why can't i bail out? There's a saying : the devil you've known for long is better than an angel you just met. She's that devil I've known for long and she's been known and has the support of family and friends.
You'll also ask: will they live together with us? My answer is so dumb cos I thought I can't find anybody better than her, even though my pocket runs dry. And one of the pastors said things will get better with her.

The dilemma I'm in now is should I put the introduction on hold, or I should go ahead with it for further observation on Bisi, or I should just carry my cross and work things out with my fiancée.... A broken relationship is better than a broken marriage, so they say.

Insults are welcomed, just for me to be a better me.

NB: I'm not in a relationship with Bisi (not her real name)
The first person (assurance 001) has said all in my mind. Pray to have your own decision and whatever you end up with, I wish you success
Re: Advice Needed: Should I Go Ahead With The Introduction by Onucs(m): 3:45pm On Aug 02, 2020
From what you have said, i think it is best if you still give it time to fully understand the scenerio before u. Marriage is a rush in rush out affair and that is why you don't rush into it.

who knows, your true love might just be none of these women.
Re: Advice Needed: Should I Go Ahead With The Introduction by Nyamve1: 3:48pm On Aug 02, 2020
I don't understand why you are attaching your success round about girls
Re: Advice Needed: Should I Go Ahead With The Introduction by sammirano: 3:50pm On Aug 02, 2020
Bull sh*it. Believe this and you will believe anything. Hadley chase.

1 Like

Re: Advice Needed: Should I Go Ahead With The Introduction by oodua1stson: 3:59pm On Aug 02, 2020
Lisabi01:
Good morning family. I need your advice. This post might be long. Kindly ignore my jargons.

I and my fiancée have been dating for years now (childhood love). 4 years ago, we broke up for like a year due to her infidelity. During that time, I was with different girls who are worse, except a girl (Bisi) who was a friend then, and was in a relationship as at then (I'll come back to this).

Back to 4 years ago, after we (i and my fiancée)broke up, things starts falling in its place, and I started living large. It all ended after we got back together, and I was back to square one. I thought it was because I was still in school, but it continued after school.

I met another girl last year, we were just friends, no strings attached. This girl told me that I have a problem, and that I'm not bothered about it. My response was that we all have different problem and that this was my trying times. She responded saying "is this how your life was few years ago?" She asked me to go out to a pastor and make my own findings. I've never seen this girl prior to this, we just talk on phone.

As per her advice, I went out to seek for a divine solution (I never believed in seeking spiritual solution from a pastor, Alfa or a traditional worshiper, but I did this time around). I was told that when things was good for me, I had a girl that I dated throughout that time, and that I should try and connect her again. I thought about it, and they were actually right. It was when I stopped calling this girl that things went south for me. I told them I don't have any connection with her again and that i can't connect her. I was later told to be observant, and that I'll meet another girl, and that thing will change for me.

Back to my friend, Bisi..... She was in an open relationship. I envied their relationship then, and I was crushing on her secretly ( I and my fiancée wasn't together then). I met Bisi recently and she told me she broke up with her boyfriend. We became friends again, and we started getting closer. She doesn't live in my town, and we don't see at all because I don't have the time. But I noticed she's all I want in a woman, and since I met her, my pocket never runs dry. I don't have that intention of dating her at first until I noticed my pocket.

Now that I'm engaged, my introduction is coming up soon, and my extended family members and my fiancée's are all aware of the date. I should have done the introduction months ago before this pandemic, but my fiancée said some hurtful and hateful words to me which I still remember and I'm still keeping it to myself. She also have some attitudes I've been correcting but never takes to correction.

I know you'll say when I noticed all the above, why can't i bail out? There's a saying : the devil you've known for long is better than an angel you just met. She's that devil I've known for long and she's been known and has the support of family and friends.
You'll also ask: will they live together with us? My answer is so dumb cos I thought I can't find anybody better than her, even though my pocket runs dry. And one of the pastors said things will get better with her.

The dilemma I'm in now is should I put the introduction on hold, or I should go ahead with it for further observation on Bisi, or I should just carry my cross and work things out with my fiancée.... A broken relationship is better than a broken marriage, so they say.

Insults are welcomed, just for me to be a better me.

NB: I'm not in a relationship with Bisi (not her real name)
it's like you like poverty ABI? You see eh, I would have thought you're talking trash but I got married to someone and I suffered so much that the marriage died not because either of us don't live each other but because I was earning 100k a month and in the 1st week of the month I was already dead broke. Now I'm with someone and things don better. I have businesses now and things are super fine.


I know where I'm going right now, and it's not back to my ex

1 Like

Re: Advice Needed: Should I Go Ahead With The Introduction by Jaqenhghar: 4:02pm On Aug 02, 2020
Lisabi01:
Good morning family. I need your advice. This post might be long. Kindly ignore my jargons.

I and my fiancée have been dating for years now (childhood love). 4 years ago, we broke up for like a year due to her infidelity. During that time, I was with different girls who are worse, except a girl (Bisi) who was a friend then, and was in a relationship as at then (I'll come back to this).

Back to 4 years ago, after we (i and my fiancée)broke up, things starts falling in its place, and I started living large. It all ended after we got back together, and I was back to square one. I thought it was because I was still in school, but it continued after school.

I met another girl last year, we were just friends, no strings attached. This girl told me that I have a problem, and that I'm not bothered about it. My response was that we all have different problem and that this was my trying times. She responded saying "is this how your life was few years ago?" She asked me to go out to a pastor and make my own findings. I've never seen this girl prior to this, we just talk on phone.

As per her advice, I went out to seek for a divine solution (I never believed in seeking spiritual solution from a pastor, Alfa or a traditional worshiper, but I did this time around). I was told that when things was good for me, I had a girl that I dated throughout that time, and that I should try and connect her again. I thought about it, and they were actually right. It was when I stopped calling this girl that things went south for me. I told them I don't have any connection with her again and that i can't connect her. I was later told to be observant, and that I'll meet another girl, and that thing will change for me.

Back to my friend, Bisi..... She was in an open relationship. I envied their relationship then, and I was crushing on her secretly ( I and my fiancée wasn't together then). I met Bisi recently and she told me she broke up with her boyfriend. We became friends again, and we started getting closer. She doesn't live in my town, and we don't see at all because I don't have the time. But I noticed she's all I want in a woman, and since I met her, my pocket never runs dry. I don't have that intention of dating her at first until I noticed my pocket.

Now that I'm engaged, my introduction is coming up soon, and my extended family members and my fiancée's are all aware of the date. I should have done the introduction months ago before this pandemic, but my fiancée said some hurtful and hateful words to me which I still remember and I'm still keeping it to myself. She also have some attitudes I've been correcting but never takes to correction.

I know you'll say when I noticed all the above, why can't i bail out? There's a saying : the devil you've known for long is better than an angel you just met. She's that devil I've known for long and she's been known and has the support of family and friends.
You'll also ask: will they live together with us? My answer is so dumb cos I thought I can't find anybody better than her, even though my pocket runs dry. And one of the pastors said things will get better with her.

The dilemma I'm in now is should I put the introduction on hold, or I should go ahead with it for further observation on Bisi, or I should just carry my cross and work things out with my fiancée.... A broken relationship is better than a broken marriage, so they say.

Insults are welcomed, just for me to be a better me.

NB: I'm not in a relationship with Bisi (not her real name)
Simple. Tell your fiancee that you got another girl pregnant. She will break up with you so fast.
Re: Advice Needed: Should I Go Ahead With The Introduction by Roundpeg: 4:02pm On Aug 02, 2020
It's when a man start searching for a life partner that he would realize the scarcity of women.

1 Like

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