Forgive forget and move on.

It is well. It is never good to pay evil with evil. You can keep your distance and the same time help in the little way you can. You cannot change the fact that THEY ARE STILL YOUR PARENTS.

but part time graduates don't go for NYSC, how come u said u did ur NYSC after graduating as a part time student?

uboma:
This is deep.

The final decision is entirely yours to make.

Please forgive your parents and assist if you have the means.

Remember that their blood runs in you. No one can choose his/her parents.

What you went through and the total abandonment from them was very painful.

Put the past behind you. Forgive them and free yourself the emotional trauma.

Whatever decision you take, I wish you all the best.

If you need us to talk more about these, do contact me via the private mail.

This is a very bullshitty talk... These people are just trying to come back to his life to put financial burden on him.. Family isn't by blood.. Family is who loves you. If the op needs a family.. He should get married to a woman he loves and who loves him in return... Oh.. He should forgive and start taking over their financial burden? Ask yourself this question.. If he had died, would they have cared?? How the hell do you abandon a 2 years old child and expect to escape repercussions by way of forgiveness??.. These people are coming back for the money

Your parents are indeed wicked. If you allow them, they can still pull you down. Forgive them but move on with your life. Give them financial assistance when you can but nothing more than that. Don't accept any other responsibility because they have not changed.
Your mum even surprises me more!
Please get married and move on with your life.

SecretSpy666:
Greetings Nairalanders,
I want to seek for you peoples opinions regarding my family challenges.

I'm from a broken home. My parents divorced when I was a child of two years. I'm the only child from their union. My father and mother abandoned me and remarried to other spouse each. I passed through hell growing up with relatives who insulted me with all kinds of names and I was treated like a slave to their own children.

Because of public outcry about my dehumanizing treatment, my father came to village and took me to the city. It was from fry pan to fire experience as my father's new wife was maltreating me. At a point, my father asked me to leave his house that since my arrival, he don't have peace with his wife.

I packed to the house of a relative and work in a block industry to help myself. Most times, I slept in a CAC church close to the relative house as the two-room apartment is not enough for his family. My mother never care if I was alive. She never call me nor reply to letter I sent through someone to her. I continued working in the block industry and started a part time programme. I completed the part time programme and did my NYSC and master degree. I got a job with University of Ado Ekiti with the help of a course mate, managing myself now and surprisingly my mother and father started calling me often.

Both of them have 6 children each with their respective second spouse. Mother want his son to come and live with me, I refused and my father too have been requesting for financial assistance which I also refused. I don't want to have anything to do with both of them. My father's daughter recently called me to help her with school fees, I bluntly told her to ask her mother what she did to me and caught the call. Since then, she never call.

I'm alone and have just two friends. I don't have family. All of them calling now are just looking for what to get from me, not that they care about me. My mother never call me once to ask about my welfare even when I sent my phone number to her through her relative. I wrote WAEC, completed degree course before she started calling me and it is only to request for one thing or other. I'm planning to get married without telling them and build a separate family.

.. Baami move on with your life .. Just forgive them of their sins and go your path you don't owe them a penny you owe God all gratitude

I went practically through same, i was 8 though.

What i did, i relate with both, but i always tell stories whenever they ask for money

SecretSpy666:
Greetings Nairalanders,
I want to seek for you peoples opinions regarding my family challenges.

I'm from a broken home. My parents divorced when I was a child of two years. I'm the only child from their union. My father and mother abandoned me and remarried to other spouse each. I passed through hell growing up with relatives who insulted me with all kinds of names and I was treated like a slave to their own children.

Because of public outcry about my dehumanizing treatment, my father came to village and took me to the city. It was from fry pan to fire experience as my father's new wife was maltreating me. At a point, my father asked me to leave his house that since my arrival, he don't have peace with his wife.

I packed to the house of a relative and work in a block industry to help myself. Most times, I slept in a CAC church close to the relative house as the two-room apartment is not enough for his family. My mother never care if I was alive. She never call me nor reply to letter I sent through someone to her. I continued working in the block industry and started a part time programme. I completed the part time programme and did my NYSC and master degree. I got a job with University of Ado Ekiti with the help of a course mate, managing myself now and surprisingly my mother and father started calling me often.

Both of them have 6 children each with their respective second spouse. Mother want his son to come and live with me, I refused and my father too have been requesting for financial assistance which I also refused. I don't want to have anything to do with both of them. My father's daughter recently called me to help her with school fees, I bluntly told her to ask her mother what she did to me and caught the call. Since then, she never call.

I'm alone and have just two friends. I don't have family. All of them calling now are just looking for what to get from me, not that they care about me. My mother never call me once to ask about my welfare even when I sent my phone number to her through her relative. I wrote WAEC, completed degree course before she started calling me and it is only to request for one thing or other. I'm planning to get married without telling them and build a separate family.

adebayo3449:
I don't want to say much about this.
But I will advise you to call the young lady back and help her, if you have the capacity.

Don't you dare emotionally manipulate this guy.. They deserve nothing from him

Let me say this,there is something people don't know about forgiveness, that you forgive someone doesn't mean things have to go back to normal. You can forgive them ,but you are not obligated to be a son to them cos they long lost that right ,you grew up like an orphan, I am sure if you live the rest of your life like an orphan you will be just fine.


You do not owe any of them anything ,not emotionally , financially or even spiritually.

Sorry dear, in my humble opinion, based on what I have read, U don't have a parent..

<<<The man u think was your father is a sperm donor..

<<<The woman you think was your mother was an incubator.. she was there just to hatch the egg.. and what happens after the egg is hatched, an incubator doesn't know or care.

<<< No one should reap where they did not sow.. even the good book frowns at it..

Double check the meaning of parent in all encyclopedia.. check their qualities/ characteristics. . . if the one u got doesn't fit in, just maintain your lane.

Good luck.

SecretSpy666:

The got to know of where I'm working. I don't know who told them. They arranged with someone I was relating with to bring them to my house. When I got Intel about it. Warned the person not to bring anyone to my house and dissociated with the person. Now they are saying I'm rich and don't want to help anyone but I don't care.

Please don't care.....
Just don't pay them any attention now.

And do not forget to remind them of how they treated You when they call or try to get to you again

Clonepops:


Alaye shut the Bleep up... If you mess up to people you can't escape the repercussions through the instrumentality of forgiveness... Why should he forgive.. Oh so they would come and be fleecing him off money

Do you need help with comprehension? Did I ask him to give out money?

GboyegaD:
One of the things I read here is ignorance on their part. One might be thinking he is punishing the other without recourse to jow the instrument used (you in this case) feels about it.

They have erred and deserve forgiveness. Having a relationship with them to know their person, ideology, and character flaws as a way of guiding yourself is no crime. You do not need part with your money to achieve this.

sir did you miss the part where they've been billing him already with request without properly apologising or giving him space to know if he has forgiven them....

Clonepops:


This is a very bullshitty talk... These people are just trying to come back to his life to put financial burden on him.. Family isn't by blood.. Family is who loves you. If the op needs a family.. He should get married to a woman he loves and who loves him in return... Oh.. He should forgive and start taking over their financial burden? Ask yourself this question.. If he had died, would they have cared?? How the hell do you abandon a 2 years old child and expect to escape repercussions by way of forgiveness??.. These people are coming back for the money

His parents are pure evil. A 2 year old child for crying out loud!!!

How dare they abandon you! I can't believe the audacity of that woman, how can a mother treat her own child like that? Its only by the grace of God you have managed to get where you are. Concentrate on building your own family, make sure you pick a good decent wife and forget about the past. They are now in the past look towards the future may God guide you through!

Ishilove:

He doesn't owe them a dime. They failed in their responsibilities as his parents.


Yes I am.

Like people should not use this Christianity to promote bullshit... If you want a wet floor, you pour water on the floor... You can't take me through hell and tell me to "forgive`

Just forgive them, but avoid them. They are a sorry excuse for parents.
My parents seperated too, but they didn't treat me that way.
No child deserves to be treated the way they treated you.once more, I advise you to help them from afar.
They don't deserve you

UDUJ:


I completely disagree with the boldfaced, NOPE. Some people are not worth forgiving.

Not like parents sir.... He can forgive them but will not get close to them... It is possible.


Gracia Master.... U av done so good... Thanks

Mindlog:
Both parents are yet to acknowledge that they did wrong, dismissing the wrong they did to their child. No mea culpa but feel entitled to assistance from a son they deliberately abandoned to experience a traumatic childhood.

This is not just about forgiving or not but are you capable of accommodating their toxicity? Uninvolved parenting tends to have adverse effect on an individual up to adulthood as most tend to have difficulties forming attachments.

Like that's the issue here.. They are both manipulative... They just want the money

This is what I've been asking some people - what would end this misunderstanding, if for instance, your father or mother decides to pay about N10m into yr account, wld that be the price of forgiveness

Atimes we feel very hurt, but with time, all these wl fade away. Even without any price, the sacrifice of forgiveness & letting go wl come to play

waliezia:
but part time graduates don't go for NYSC, how come u said u did ur NYSC after graduating as a part time student?

And this is the only thing you could pick from the write-up Mr. Know it all?

Op this ya perents no try at all.....

pls forgive them but dnt ever eat their food or sleep in same house wit them. help them in any way u can but dnt go the extra mile. pls never ever trust them, they may poison u cos their own favorite children is not up and doing,trust me on this.
call them once a while and let them bless u and pray for u. give only what u can but dnt let ur guards off.

Na wah oh.
When you hear people's background stories, you can only thank God for that you had.

Your stepbrothers and sisters never wronged there's no reason to transfer the hate to them.. show them love when necessary if you can..

As for your parents.. still find a place to forgive them but that doesn't mean you will do what ever they want.. you can always keep your distance

SecretSpy666:
Greetings Nairalanders,
I want to seek for you peoples opinions regarding my family challenges.

I'm from a broken home. My parents divorced when I was a child of two years. I'm the only child from their union. My father and mother abandoned me and remarried to other spouse each. I passed through hell growing up with relatives who insulted me with all kinds of names and I was treated like a slave to their own children.

Because of public outcry about my dehumanizing treatment, my father came to village and took me to the city. It was from fry pan to fire experience as my father's new wife was maltreating me. At a point, my father asked me to leave his house that since my arrival, he don't have peace with his wife.

I packed to the house of a relative and work in a block industry to help myself. Most times, I slept in a CAC church close to the relative house as the two-room apartment is not enough for his family. My mother never care if I was alive. She never call me nor reply to letter I sent through someone to her. I continued working in the block industry and started a part time programme. I completed the part time programme and did my NYSC and master degree. I got a job with University of Ado Ekiti with the help of a course mate, managing myself now and surprisingly my mother and father started calling me often.

Both of them have 6 children each with their respective second spouse. Mother want his son to come and live with me, I refused and my father too have been requesting for financial assistance which I also refused. I don't want to have anything to do with both of them. My father's daughter recently called me to help her with school fees, I bluntly told her to ask her mother what she did to me and caught the call. Since then, she never call.

I'm alone and have just two friends. I don't have family. All of them calling now are just looking for what to get from me, not that they care about me. My mother never call me once to ask about my welfare even when I sent my phone number to her through her relative. I wrote WAEC, completed degree course before she started calling me and it is only to request for one thing or other. I'm planning to get married without telling them and build a separate family.

The truth is that you are your son, you have no father or mother simple. Those people calling you are not your parents go on with your life like they don't exist, can you imagine the emotional wreck this guy has gone through and some (sorry to say this) lackadaisical bunch start calling him for support. Rubbish.

OP Have a Forgiving Spirit and Forgive your moda fvcking Family Members and only use your head while dealing with them.
E get why...Who Rise now fit fall tomorrow and who dey ground now fit still Rise..No man is an Island ooo.

Froshloaded:


I've read it.



Hell no.




This is life for you o..

I feel he should just forgive his parents and do what he can afford ..


BTW are you a christian?

Why should he do what he can afford... Were they there for him,.. Did they clothe him.. Did they show him love,... If he forgives them.. He would only add a financial burden to himself... How do you abandon a child.. The. Come back years later to come apologize just cos you want money from him... Forgiveness jo.. Forgiver ni..he should move away fast from them

Bro I swear I am lucky. I am from a broken home too. My parents divorced when I was 2 also but they both did their best to take care of me.. I understand how u feel. Your parents bleeped up big time... from my perspective forgive them but don't have anything to do with them bcuz parents who can abandon their child re as dangerous as the devil.. just live ur life nd make a beta future for ur unborn children.

No one throws away the bath water with the baby,that was what your parents forgot,no matter the bitterness they have for themselves is not your fault.I advise you to move on with your life. Try to build strong relationships with positive benefits. Most wealthy men I know do not have siblings let alone parents.
Just focus your strength on giving your kids to come proper sense of belonging and invest in their education.
Lastly ask God to remove the burden and grudge you have in your heart for your parents so you can be spiritually and psychologically free.

Abandon them before they suck you back into their paradigm of stagnation.