Afikoo:
Good morning Nairalanders. I sure know you all fine.
I am writing this with heavy heart.
I know we have super rich people here who rose from poverty to riches.
This life isn't balance. Done with school. Been working as security administrator in my church and I earn 80k. I have beenplanning on getting married. Have met my fiance Parents, they were happy. I have engaged her she is happy. All of a sudden the elder brother who isn't around is angry that I haven't spoken to him about my intention. I have earlier tried his line severallly and it isnt going through. Had to chat him and he told me I am not serious that I should grow up. A bullet in my heart.
Her mum has suddenly changed and is accusing me for not calling her always.
This whole drama has gotten into my babe now she is talking about us suspending our marriage plan and try improving our income. (she is learning a skill)

I am fed up. Have suspended everything now. I have tried everything since I left school last year to improve my income. Apply for jobs here and there. Is just not cutting in.
Please, share your experience on how you were able to get out of this average life as a Nigerian. Advise me and others still struggling to rise up.
You can recommend jobs for me.
I studied history and Diplomatic Studies.
Have some certification in Leadership and human resource. Trust me, I can deliver on anything legal. I have the capacity, but haven't gotten the opportunity.
Patiently reading.

Stop looking for work and start to Google/YouTube search for how you can make a legitimate passive income online while you're sleeping.

UyaiIncomparabl:


Link up for what?

Don't be afraid of the real man.

That's where your love and sheild is assured.

Do not force any lady into marriage, You pay is manageable except Na slay Queen she be. Our problem is trying to please people.
2016, I was earning 17500 naira when got married Bro. I reduce the people's expectation by doing the needful.
Today, life don change. If she no reason you please let her go.

Afikoo:
.

I am 32. I have been working for 7 years here. Also working while in school. Just finished last year and got a pay rise to 80k as security administrator.

Baba, my issue isn't the marriage. My issue is the money. I am desperately asking on how best improve my income. Concrete suggestions on what I need to lay my hands on now to get started. I am tire of submitting applications

My man my have you heard of virtual esl teaching job before?

pretydiva:
I think you should suspend the wedding, then you both work on your income. Things are pretty hard these days
You both should be financially buoyant before venturing into marriage

the guy is financially establish already as a job of 80k is pretty cool considering the fact that there are no jobs.
Your myopic sense and shallow way of reasoning was too low to comprehend that the ball is in the girl's court that she should go get a job and stop being a leech.

Afikoo:


Of course I have suspended it.

I am working earning 80k. I need more. I have tried.
That's the last kart of my tweet comes in place.

How can one get out of this average life. I need a better job

you're a simp and a very bloody one.
There are no jobs out there, my elder brother's monthly remuneration is 60k and he's already married with two kids and they're living fine.
Guess what? the wife is also employed too, so you with your 80k wants to please a woman by not telling her to go get a job.
Times have changed and everything now is mutual.
Tell her to go get a job if she's even interested in the marriage.

Escabado:



He should be the one working and saving money you while His fiance should be idel or better still be sleeping with other men waiting till he makes millions abi . Just listen to your self.

yomi007k:


The guy still dey ask me "thanksgiving for what"

I don't pity men that women deal with. They actually deserve it bro.

Jessepaid:
Hehehe..so women no still understand that Rude boy reason with me song

Look for woman wey get income..

Nobody can be understanding forever...at one point or another their patience always runs out..

Listen man you earn twice the minimum wage... You not doing bad at all..

If I was in your shoes, I would be thinking of upgrading myself instead of allowing women issues to weigh me down

Jamestown123:
You don't know what God has done for you bro, a graduate receiving a salary of 80k is really Thanksgiving. My brother haa.

The dude still has this mentality that a man must be the sole breadwinner while the woman contributes little financially.
well I don't blame him, it's obvious he's enslaved in the love entanglement hence the desperation to please the lady's parents.
His remuneration of 80k is very okay, what he needs is just a capital to start a side business as a back up while maintaining the 80k job cos there are no jobs in the country and he's so lucky but the love and eagerness to please a lady won't make him see himself as being so lucky and one amongst few that is blessed with a job after graduation.
He should suspend marriage, save from the salary and start a side business, reduce cost of living, get a single room with lesser rent charges and hustle like there's no tomorrow.
He shouldn't be desperate for marriage especially to a woman that contributes Nothing financially or else na suffering you want welcome so.
If that lady is at all interested in the marriage she should go get an 80k job too.
Op never leave your job oh till you land a more better one

FanOfMyself:

okay, you have a computer system? are you ready to dedicate at least 4 hours everyday to learn and practice? and finally you have to pay just a token to purchase the training courses (in video formats)? four courses to bring you from novice to intermediate level, each course will cost you 2k totaling 8k. Then I will be giving you exercises and mini projects to do after the first three courses. I will be available to answer ALL of your questions. I will link you up with other students learning under me so that you guys can stay motivated. let me know if you are in....They good thing is that you will still keep your job at least until when you have become an expert and start working full time as a software developer

this is programming and it's always very hard to grasp

Okay you're earning 80k a month, the useless thing you want to marry is earning zero. But somehow marriage plans should be put on hold because you have to earn more while the worthless thing continue to learn skill.

Like she has spent the previous years of her worthless life watching mark angel comedy and learning make up or probably eating shawarma and cassava and now it's time to learn a skill.

Pls she is not ur friend and definitely not your wife. If you make this mistake, you're just very very very doomed.

Don't even sweat it.

Afikoo:
Good morning Nairalanders. I sure know you all fine.
I am writing this with heavy heart.
I know we have super rich people here who rose from poverty to riches.
This life isn't balance. Done with school. Been working as security administrator in my church and I earn 80k. I have beenplanning on getting married. Have met my fiance Parents, they were happy. I have engaged her she is happy. All of a sudden the elder brother who isn't around is angry that I haven't spoken to him about my intention. I have earlier tried his line severallly and it isnt going through. Had to chat him and he told me I am not serious that I should grow up. A bullet in my heart.
Her mum has suddenly changed and is accusing me for not calling her always.
This whole drama has gotten into my babe now she is talking about us suspending our marriage plan and try improving our income. (she is learning a skill)

I am fed up. Have suspended everything now. I have tried everything since I left school last year to improve my income. Apply for jobs here and there. Is just not cutting in.
Please, share your experience on how you were able to get out of this average life as a Nigerian. Advise me and others still struggling to rise up.
You can recommend jobs for me.
I studied history and Diplomatic Studies.
Have some certification in Leadership and human resource. Trust me, I can deliver on anything legal. I have the capacity, but haven't gotten the opportunity.
Patiently reading.

Suspend the wedding and switch to a more profitable profession. Who History help? You didn't help your future studying history in school. You have to change career path

FanOfMyself:

web development sir.
But web development can be said to be a subset of software development. Web applications (like Nairaland for instance) are softwares in their own right the difference is that they need the web ( as a backbone) to run. Other "subsets" of software development includes Mobile Applications development ( andriod and ios apps dominates here), Embbeded systems ( e.g. a software system embedded in a car dashboard), Desktop Applications development (apps running on our laptops/desktop computer), Artificial Intelligence (Robots) etc.
Take this to the Bank sir!!!!!

bro please, teach na i have all d requirement

ebenezer202l:
the guy is financially establish already as a job of 80k is pretty cool considering the fact that there are no jobs.
Your myopic sense and shallow way of reasoning was too low to comprehend that the ball is in the girl's court that she should go get a job and stop being a leech.

You are the one with a very myopic and shallow way of reasoning. Your brain is so low that you couldn't decipher from op's write up that the girl is learning a skill. If you have a brain, try use it for once. It takes a leech to know one. Using people's comments to clout chase
Now that you have been noticed, now swerve.

Wait a min... You're earning 80k yet your fiancee believes you can't start a family? Mind you, there are family men earning 30k and they are still pushing it and praying God picks their call ( which He'll surely do).

With 80k, you're good to go for starters unless she's the greedy type that likes to live extravagant luxury lifestyle just to show off.

Let her get a paying job asap so with her own contribution you guys can start a small family. The problem with most newly married couples is that they tend to rush themselves by having so many children within a short space of time and then everything will now jampack and box them into a tight corner. Start by having only one child. So you guys can have enough time to save and plan for yourselves. But waiting until you start receiving 300k might kill your interest in the relationship.

I just hope this is not her way of discharging you courtesy advice from her family because I don't see any sense in her excuse at the last minute after glady going through the stages of dating and engagement.

pocohantas:


The 32 took me by shock. Nigeria na useless country sha. 7yrs in the labour market with 80k salary. Kai!!!

Abeg change your dp.

lol na small thing you go add untop 80k to reach your own salary na...
Why you dey do like say difference too dey between you and am?
The only difference be say you get support,e no get.
Why are you shocked?

ArticleBeast:

Are you the Op? Na money dem take dey find money

ok

pozehnani:
Wait a min... You're earning 80k yet your fiancee believes you can't start a family? Mind you, there are family men earning 30k and they are still pushing it and praying God picks their call ( which He'll surely do).

With 80k, you're good to go for starters unless she's the greedy type that likes to live extravagant luxury lifestyle just to show off.

Let her get a paying job asap so with her own contribution you guys can start a small family. The problem with most newly married couples is that they tend to rush themselves by having so many children within a short space of time and then everything will now jampack and box them into a tight corner. Start by having only one child. So you guys can have enough time to save and plan for yourselves. But waiting until you start receiving 300k might kill your interest in the relationship.

I just hope this is not her way of discharging you courtesy advice from her family because I don't see any sense in her excuse at the last minute after glady going through the stages of dating and engagement.

God bless you my dear sister.
you're truly a woman that God will bless cos from your comment I can see the kind of Unique personality you possess
if you scroll up you'll read my earlier comment where I said my elder brother even with 60k salary is married with two kids and they're living just fine cos the wife is gainfully employed too.
They just need to cut some expenses except she's the luxurious type and he also needs save some money for a side business while continuing the 80k job cos in this country job dey hard to find.
like you said, I feel the lady's family don't like him and they just use a flimsy excuse to discharge him.
cc pretydiva (Ugly diva) you can see the comment emanating from a lady of intellect, you should be ashamed of yourself.
Ozuor

femi4:
Suspend the wedding and switch to a more profitable profession. Who History help? You didn't help your future studying history in school. You have to change career path

that course is so useless.
I.T courses are the best

Afikoo:
Good morning Nairalanders. I sure know you all fine.
I am writing this with heavy heart.
I know we have super rich people here who rose from poverty to riches.
This life isn't balance. Done with school. Been working as security administrator in my church and I earn 80k. I have beenplanning on getting married. Have met my fiance Parents, they were happy. I have engaged her she is happy. All of a sudden the elder brother who isn't around is angry that I haven't spoken to him about my intention. I have earlier tried his line severallly and it isnt going through. Had to chat him and he told me I am not serious that I should grow up. A bullet in my heart.
Her mum has suddenly changed and is accusing me for not calling her always.
This whole drama has gotten into my babe now she is talking about us suspending our marriage plan and try improving our income. (she is learning a skill)

I am fed up. Have suspended everything now. I have tried everything since I left school last year to improve my income. Apply for jobs here and there. Is just not cutting in.
Please, share your experience on how you were able to get out of this average life as a Nigerian. Advise me and others still struggling to rise up.
You can recommend jobs for me.
I studied history and Diplomatic Studies.
Have some certification in Leadership and human resource. Trust me, I can deliver on anything legal. I have the capacity, but haven't gotten the opportunity.
Patiently reading.

Dear OP, though this is my humble opinion, for a fresh gradauate 80k pay is not bad, your girlfriend and her mother are not being considerate and sooner than later she will kick you out of her life.

My advice to you is to forget about your girlfriend for now, continue your work, save and invest, look for a girl who will appreciate what you have. Do not allow some low life people put you into unnecessary pressure.

ebenezer202l:
for your information I'm working with the federal government and I'm being remunerated monthly and the income is 20k added to the OP's monthly earnings, asides that I got several businesses and got employees working for me and I use that to support my fiancee too.
Can you be proud enough to boast of such achievement?
Nah you're just a jambite or probably a polytechnic student leeching off and fuccking every dicck available just to survive on campus.
I don't respond to low lives cos it's obvious we're not on the same page.
Fvck off hoe

Hahaha. I laugh you in swahili. You Prolly was still in secondary school when I left the uni. Your acclaimed achievements adds no value to me. It's for your pocket only. I don't need to brag about my achievements here on a faceless forum. So I will leave you to keep wallowing in your ignorance .
And for the records, it takes a hoe to recognise one�

FanOfMyself:

Check the link on my signature... that's my personal website

i hv check it already anyway change it to fanofeverybody....... i hope it ring a bell

Afikoo:
Good morning Nairalanders. I sure know you all fine.
I am writing this with heavy heart.
I know we have super rich people here who rose from poverty to riches.
This life isn't balance. Done with school. Been working as security administrator in my church and I earn 80k. I have beenplanning on getting married. Have met my fiance Parents, they were happy. I have engaged her she is happy. All of a sudden the elder brother who isn't around is angry that I haven't spoken to him about my intention. I have earlier tried his line severallly and it isnt going through. Had to chat him and he told me I am not serious that I should grow up. A bullet in my heart.
Her mum has suddenly changed and is accusing me for not calling her always.
This whole drama has gotten into my babe now she is talking about us suspending our marriage plan and try improving our income. (she is learning a skill)

I am fed up. Have suspended everything now. I have tried everything since I left school last year to improve my income. Apply for jobs here and there. Is just not cutting in.
Please, share your experience on how you were able to get out of this average life as a Nigerian. Advise me and others still struggling to rise up.
You can recommend jobs for me.
I studied history and Diplomatic Studies.
Have some certification in Leadership and human resource. Trust me, I can deliver on anything legal. I have the capacity, but haven't gotten the opportunity.
Patiently reading.

My advise to you would be to suspend the mariage plans and try and improve your finances. Once you get married you would be under intense pressure cos you will have more expenses that need to be taken care of.

Think of something you enjoy doing and learn a skill in it so that you can broaden your income base

chingle5:


i hv check it already anyway change it to fanofeverybody....... i hope it ring a bell

Oh my nigga... Socrates/Pluto

Afikoo:
Good morning Nairalanders. I sure know you all fine.
I am writing this with heavy heart.
I know we have super rich people here who rose from poverty to riches.
This life isn't balance. Done with school. Been working as security administrator in my church and I earn 80k. I have beenplanning on getting married. Have met my fiance Parents, they were happy. I have engaged her she is happy. All of a sudden the elder brother who isn't around is angry that I haven't spoken to him about my intention. I have earlier tried his line severallly and it isnt going through. Had to chat him and he told me I am not serious that I should grow up. A bullet in my heart.
Her mum has suddenly changed and is accusing me for not calling her always.
This whole drama has gotten into my babe now she is talking about us suspending our marriage plan and try improving our income. (she is learning a skill)

I am fed up. Have suspended everything now. I have tried everything since I left school last year to improve my income. Apply for jobs here and there. Is just not cutting in.
Please, share your experience on how you were able to get out of this average life as a Nigerian. Advise me and others still struggling to rise up.
You can recommend jobs for me.
I studied history and Diplomatic Studies.
Have some certification in Leadership and human resource. Trust me, I can deliver on anything legal. I have the capacity, but haven't gotten the opportunity.
Patiently reading.

At this age and status of yours presently, don't allow anyone to push you around

If you are OK with the suspension of the marriage plans, then go ahead with the suspension and if you think it's not necessary, just let them know that if because you have no money to start marriage preparation, you are willing to drop out of it so that their daughter will hook up with someone who is ready for marriage immediately

You know what, you have to take charge or allow them to run your marriage for you

FanOfMyself:
I can teach you web development

Please Sir/Ma, I will like to learn from you.

lilmaydee:

Please Sir/Ma, I will like to learn from you.

Please check my previous posts here and you will find my WhatsApp number.
Please don't contact me if you haven't decided to start learning right away. You can make any further enquiries from me here and I will gladly answer you.
Please you will have to make little commitments financially.
Someone contacted me and wants me to teach him for free
Nigerians never cease to amaze me at all.

pansophist:
Your girlfriend is the kind that sees marriage as the realisation of childhood fantasy, a place where she will go and enjoy herself, without having the basic understanding that its a place of responsibility, support, hardwork. She probably learnt it from her mother, her mother orientate, instead of cautioning her from it.

But... that's what marriage should be nah. Is it because economy is bad that's why you guys are shifting goal post? Did our mothers and grandmothers not get married to go and enjoy life? Why is our own going to be different?

Sixfeetbelle:


But... that's what marriage should be nah. Is it because economy is bad that's why you guys are shifting goal post? Did our mothers and grandmothers not get married to go and enjoy life? Why is our own going to be different?

the point is that you should also contribute to the marriage and stop being a leech

Sixfeetbelle:


But... that's what marriage should be nah. Is it because economy is bad that's why you guys are shifting goal post? Did our mothers and grandmothers not get married to go and enjoy life? Why is our own going to be different?

But our mother understood their traditional responsibilities na, that is the difference. They washed plate, prepared pounded yam, babysit, were submissive, respected, and honored him, and even was happy being the fifth wife. That is your answer.

TheLionofLasigi:


Break up with her, save some money, learn, research and venture into agriculture, increase earnings and reduce spending(live like a poor man), buy government bonds and some Bitcoin, buy some rice when it's cheap and sell during December, reinvest the profit and repeat until you're a rice oligarch in your area, do the same for Palm oil and other commodities....and when you're rich enough take the first flight out here. Then you can marry.

this sums it all.
God bless you for this post