Perfectsouth:
;Dsincerely, this ain't funny but I saw myself laughing..
I have a light head, it won't work for me

You're a sincere man... I could see it in your write up. You're too emotional so don't try to smoke Igbo at all. Else, everything will scatter.

Regarding your estranged wife, kindly see the attached photo.

I have been reading silly comments about court or no court evidence for divorce. If I were you, I'd storm the house where my kids are, pick them up and dash to an unknown location to their mum. Pay a nanny to take care of them in my house! Let her go to court or use police to look for me. In Nigeria someone is thinking of how to be legally correct... how?

Truly I jot things down and i took things away from your story.. But my advice is for you to go and conduct a DNA Test to confirm the paternity of your children.. Your wife na big problem
[i][/i]

Punstar:

I don't want my kids to go through what I went through, I don't want my kids to go through what I went through.....That's the stupid sh!t you've been deceiving yourself with. They are going through it already, they may go through worse if you don't break ties with that woman.
File for divorce and request custody of your kids. If you tell your story in court, the judge will gladly release your kids to you.
Your sentiments are ruining your life

Sometimes you don't blame people who chose to suffer because of sentiments. I perfectly understand them.

My mother lost her parents when she was a child. She endured a very terrible marriage because she didn't want her children to suffer a fraction of what she suffered.

Me as a man, I grew up without my father's love even though he was in my presence all the while. Infact, I lived all my life like I never had a father, And I've sworn that I'll love my sons 1000% even if they're criminals.

You don't blame people for making such promises and living through them. You don't understand their experiences. They alone, know what they suffered.

Stop ving sex with that woman n get a girlfriend...m not saying marry anoda woman!

Perfectsouth:
yeah he slept with her and she felt cheated according to her..

I was legally married to her, do you wish I become promiscuous?

1st born Sept 2
2nd Sept 28..
We are not living together, we stay in separate states and body no be firewood.

I am not a gum gum guy, from what I experienced in my family, I decided to stick to one woman to avoid my kids going through whatever I went through in life.

Nbotee:
So what do U want Nairalanders to do for U now? U have seen dat she is responsible for ur problems and have seen how promiscuous she is and yet U are telling us U are in a fix? What fix?

Abeg ask am oo, cos I no understand again

My brother, I fully understand you. The issue is this, You are so kind hearted and you also love her with all your heart, which is a good thing. Just pray to GOD to know the way forward, but for now stay away from her until you get a clear instruction from GOD and she delivered as well. Prophet T.B joshua is just a speciality in this, if am to suggest. You can start by sending him mail with details of your experience.
Secondly stop blaming your father for this because he lived his life the way he wanted, you should live yours the way you also want. He never forced you to marry your wife. Just be grateful that you went through that experience, what can't kill you can only make you stronger, the bigger the challenges we face in life the bigger the responsibility GOD has for our future.

MrColdsweat:


.

True sha, at this point Na only his siblings can talk him into taking his children, since Na him know how he go love them reach

sorepco:
Stop ving sex with that woman n get a girlfriend...m not saying marry anoda woman!

sex with any woman now is a no no for now..
Just trying to get myself and life on the move first

Mare12345:
I have been reading silly comments about court or no court evidence for divorce. If I were you, I'd storm the house where my kids are, pick them up and dash to an unknown location to their mum. Pay a nanny to take care of them in my house! Let her go to court or use police to look for me. In Nigeria someone is thinking of how to be legally correct... how?

oga police officer...things doesn't work that way.the kids still needs to be with their mother.
since oo and his wife aren't killing diaselves at the moment,best thing for him to do is just to be checking on his kids,and caution his pe.nis when his wife is around and trust me...he go dey oryt.

Perfectsouth:
yeah he slept with her and she felt cheated according to her..

I was legally married to her, do you wish I become promiscuous?

1st born Sept 2
2nd Sept 28..
We are not living together, we stay in separate states and body no be firewood.

I am not a gum gum guy, from what I experienced in my family, I decided to stick to one woman to avoid my kids going through whatever I went through in life.

i hope say u d sleep with am with condom

You either look for a way to deliver her or divorce her. One of her sex partners is a ritualist, he's the one taking your fortune whenever you sleep with your wife. If you still want the marriage make sure she's delivered first, if not, your life will be rendered miserable if you keep sleeping with her.

dazzlingd:
Perfectsouth.

Thank you for this thread, I have learnt a lot.

[b]It may sound foolish, but mo matter how strong a man is, he can fall into the mercy of a woman. [/s] I almost did, this girl almost ruined my life while we were dating, gulping down my hard earned money like a sink hole and yet cheating on me....it was hard leaving her because we were close to marriage but I did.....and your thread gives me this extra confidence I made the best decision

May wisdom never depart from your home.
No matter how smart we claim we are, we will always be vulnerable in our dealings with women, that is why the book of proverbs constantly preaches abstinence and fleeing from jezebelic women Because you cannot lose in a game you don't partake in.

Perfectsouth:
yeah he slept with her and she felt cheated according to her..

I was legally married to her, do you wish I become promiscuous?

1st born Sept 2
2nd Sept 28..
We are not living together, we stay in separate states and body no be firewood.

I am not a gum gum guy, from what I experienced in my family, I decided to stick to one woman to avoid my kids going through whatever I went through in life.

You could have decided to toe a different line from your dad who didn't give a damn about you people, the moment he had another wife
A promiscous wife is a viper that kills
save yourself from that death, no amount of damage control can help you
Do away with her completely and find yourself a God fearing woman that is capable of loving you and your kids
Don't be afraid to live just because you don't want a repeat of what has happened in your family
Everyman has a different version

Perfectsouth:
As I type this, it's with tears in my eyes.. I am pained, they've done everything bad to me.. Sincerely, I don't deserve this ill treatment have gotten from this family...
It is gonna be a very long read but I know you will learn a thing or two from this..
I might not be able to touch everything but if you feel there is something I need to share and I didn't, point it out and I will shed more light on it....

This may seems a bit lengthy but you should learn one or two lessons from it..
I come from a not broken not memded marriage same as my wife but hers was worse than mine..
My father used to be a rich man. When car dealing was very lucrative, he was a top notch car dealer in akure.. So along the line, he started fornicating. His was on another level, he always take them abroad to sleep with, shop for them and do every every.. We are five in my family, I being the first born..
I had to train myself through university with photography with the help of my mum too. I remember when I was looking for project money, one of my father's wife, the one that went to give birth in Dubai just came back and they were doing naming ceremony.. I could remember I was in the rain with my mum and they were pointing at us, though we couldn't hear what they were saying.. How did I raise my project money? Sponsoring 5 kids wasn't an easy task since 3 of us was in the university. So I went with my to her work place, she was a nurse so we collected all the aprons used during immunization and washed them.. Then I also hustled to complete the money...
It was a very rough and tough life but all along, we didn't even seem like someone who has a father..

Let me jump to the reason for this thread..
I vowed never to allow whatever happened in my family happen to me in the future..
I met my wife when I was in 200 level.. I was 23 and she was 21..

Cc royalroy

Read this https://www.nairaland.com/6096237/redpill-constitution-bitter-truths

Perfectsouth:
I will never do DNA, if am still sane today it is because of those kids.. If they turn out not to be mine, bro you don't wanna know the outcome

We are talking of solving a problem and you are postponing a problem to cause bigger problems in the future.

Look, I advice you to get married to a good woman and have more kids.

These ones you presently have will take after their mother's waywardness. It's inescapable.

Pray for a good, virtuous woman, wife her and have her raise your kids.

MrColdsweat:


Sometimes you don't blame people who chose to suffer because of sentiments. I perfectly understand them.

My mother lost her parents when she was a child. She endured a very terrible marriage because she didn't want her children to suffer a fraction of what she suffered.

Me as a man, I grew up without my father's love even though he was in my presence all the while. Infact, I lived all my life like I never had a father, And I've sworn that I'll love my sons 1000% even if they're criminals.

You don't blame people for making such promises and living through them. You don't understand their experiences. They alone, know what they suffered.

Having negative experiences shouldn't be an excuse for being extremely stupid. The OP's case is one of extreme stupidity. How can one keeps living with an enemy in the name of marriage? He could take care of his kids very well without continuing with that ungrateful, spoilt, mannerless and rudderless woman he calls his wife.

The guy should borrow sense now and dissociate from that woman and her family completely before they put him into what he can never recover from. Leave that woman before it's too late. You don't have to be with her before you can give your kids the best in life. Be wise Mr. Man and stop being stupid!

Sorry I called you stupid, I don't usually talk like this but your story just keeps making me wonder why someone will just open his korokoro eyes and keeps walking into fire. It's really very strange! Pls, now wey u still get legs to run away from her, start running now before it's too late for you.

Anaerobi:

Did u read he said she changed?

Funny you... Change indeed.. person wey add stealing join her runs naim you expect to change like that.
I do not doubt the fact that such people can change, but they also need a strong force to make them change.

Perfectsouth:
yeah he slept with her and she felt cheated according to her..

I was legally married to her, do you wish I become promiscuous?

1st born Sept 2
2nd Sept 28..
We are not living together, we stay in separate states and body no be firewood.

I am not a gum gum guy, from what I experienced in my family, I decided to stick to one woman to avoid my kids going through whatever I went through in life.

bro divorce her...the bible says if you cant keep together let her go...
1 Corinthians 7:15 - But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such [cases]: but God hath called us to peace.
if she won't change let her go...
i know many big pastor who went for divorce and never looked back...
pastor chris did...same with okotie..
Nobody is above mistake. ..
so correct your mistake. ...
Dont marry because of beauty but find a godly woman and marry...for peace else she might kill you ...
you will lose everything then...
you have a chance to do that now...

jadyclem:

Having negative experiences shouldn't be an excuse for being extremely stupid. The OP's case is one of extreme stupidity. How can one keeps living with an enemy in the name of marriage? He could take care of his kids very well without continuing with that ungrateful, spoilt, mannerless and rudderless woman he calls his wife.

The guy should borrow sense now and dissociate from that woman and her family completely before they put him into what he can never recover from. Leave that woman before it's too late. You don't have to be with her before you can give your kids the best in life. Be wise Mr. Man and stop being stupid!

Sorry I called you stupid, I don't usually talk like this but your story just keeps making me wonder why someone will just open his korokoro eyes and keeps walking into fire. It's really very strange! Pls, now wey u still get legs to run away from her, start running now before it's too late for you.

My post is not about him staying or leaving.

My post is about people making decisions based on past experience. It's how life works.

Nbotee:
So what do U want Nairalanders to do for U now? U have seen dat she is responsible for ur problems and have seen how promiscuous she is and yet U are telling us U are in a fix? What fix?

Abeg help me ask him ooo!!! E de hungry me to swear for this guy since, but because today is Sunday...na y I de maintain.

stacyadams:
. U c y its good to drink and smoke some times and have one igbo smoking friend.....it kips our brain running

Hahahaha ����

It's just to teach you some lesson about life... My guy just forget about that family and move on... Those kids might not be yours sef... But just do your own, if possible do a DNA when you have the money to be sure they are your kids... I feel your pain bro... Just stay safe

Oga, stop with d blame. U ve proven a thousand times to be beta Dan ur dad.
Wen life throws shit at u, u man up to rid urslf of d stain nd smell.Yeah, ur dad made some mistakes, but u r trying so hard not to make same(which is understandable) Bt ur case is quite different u r a responsible fada nd u put ur kids first u don't want to do something dat will jeopardize deir future nd affect dem psychologically(so totful). Bt den, ur wife, wen u had challenges she was quick to fly away like d proverbial bird. Let ur priority b ur kids.continue to play ur role as a father. Be present at every stage of deir lives, be closer to Dem now more Dan ever nd make beautiful memories with dem. As 4 ur wife, d decision is solely urs to make.

Ogs eyin le koju ni gbogbo agbaye

May your type never cross my lineage, Amen. You are not man enough. A high level Simp, Grade 1 Simp , No human dares mess up with me this way.

Op them don wash give you drink long time ago. I dey suspect say them even cage you inside bottle before, but your prayers have opened it. Just that you prefer to remain inside

XDaBOSS:


Abeg help me ask him ooo!!! E de hungry me to swear for this guy since, but because today is Sunday...na y I de maintain.

swear for me join the emotional stress I dey go through?
You get conscience like this?

thymm50:
Op them don wash give you drink long time ago. I dey suspect say them even cage you inside bottle before, but your prayers have opened it. Just that you prefer to remain inside

na WA,

Perfectsouth:
sent a dm

Email me your number infonimasa@gmail.com
I'll WhatsApp you so we'll talk.
Or chat me 08165881375

Perused through all you wrote and I'll advice accordingly.
It seems you love your wife deeply and its hurting you like hell that she's this irresponsible. If I advice you to leave hers, you won't because you have got a rigid mindset which frankly might be another source of problems with your wife.
Let no one deceive you that it's her sin and waywardness that's affecting you. If you're a Christian, prayerful and all then the Grace that covers you, covers your wife. Never make the mistake of seeking solutions in spiri houses otherwise you'll be bargaining for far worse problems.
Divorce your wife and stay unmarried or remain with her, use a condom and help her seek help. Her mother is that way. She's been indoctrinated by her mother so don't waste your time. Don't eat anything she cooks till there's total repentance.
My candid advice though will be to break up your union. She has since left you. Move on my brother. Alternatively, you can pick up a second wife. Marrying à second wife isn't wrong, rather it's necessitated by circumstances beyond your control. Make sure your second is aware of the first and vice versa. Let your 1st wife remain where she is and let the second be where you are. They must never be under the same roof or same city. That way you are free. Let her be her and you be you. Shine your eye well before you embark on the second journey. Under no circumstance must you eat something from the 1st. If you must do, grab ya rubber.

Mr, find your way! You no longer have a wife. You have only children. Thank God they are just two. Work hard and pray harder. Start a new life. Get another woman who has vision and will align with your life goals. A woman who is not ready to have more than 2kids so you will have a total of four. You can still be salvaged. And above all get closer to God.