i am the first born of my family and there is almost four years difference between my immediate younger sister and i. my sister is always rude dat i sumtimes 1der wot her problem is. dis mite sound like the normal relationship dat exists among siblings but i tell u mine is different. d worst part of d story is dat my mother sides her and even abuses me in her presence. we have three younger ones and she cannot tolerate any nonsense from dem, but does d opposite to me. most of our arguments result in fights and i always get d blame. my parents always want me to report her to them afta which nothin would be done. my mother always tries to paint a picture of me being responsible for the whole situation and other elderly people sought of believe woteva she says. i am really confused on wot to do wit ha cuz their words sometimes make me feel i have a problem

I was in the same ol shit as you, The truth is there is no solution. And believe it or not, you love her more than you even know. Your parents will never take side with you (its as if they are blind to everything she does). Its a very stupid orientation they have but such is life. And the abuses from your parents only give your sis more guts to continue making your life hell. I'll say you should live through it until u leave home. thats my advice

try and stick with it or ignore it. Its going to be hard to do but learn to grow over it. One day you both will have to live separate lives perhaps then she will come back to her senses.
My younger brothers where much worse sometimes you wish you were either the last born or the only kid. But after a while they both outgrew the immaturity and now nuff respect for big bros o.

Its going to feel like she's the worst person on earth but after she gets older you'll thank God for giving u the best sibling ever. I've been there and gone thru it. soon u'll look back and laugh at all those pranks.

wow, ur family and mine is almost d same 'cause i have a sister who is almost 4 years older than me. But d difference is that we're really close and pple even mistake us for twins. she's d only sister i've got. I tell her almost everythin' and i respect her a lot. Not that we have never had a misunderstanding but my mother doesn't take sides. she'll caution her alright to act the adult but she yells at me too when i talk too much. she tells me to be quiet that she is d older one. Our misunderstandings have made us even closer. I guess urs is different. U need to talk to that Lil' sis of urs. she might be goin' through some stuffs which u're not aware of not that that is any reason why she shld be rude. But try and get closer to her, talk to her, ask her what d problem is and if u could be of help. u never know. ask her to confide in u. U're d older one, she can't be that out of control. Just try to talk to her, though. Am sure u can handle it.

@tayo4me,

ur current expr is not uncommon with family relationship. We all virtually had similar when growing up. Just concentrate & channel your energy toward your studies. believe me sincerely nobody we teach or force her to give you the desire respect. Be warn don't force it on her - we all exprienced that. Your parent may likely take side with her bc you are older & moreso she is a girl.

Cut your respect from your success. face ur study squarely & maintain the lead. I hope you are not indulging in any sort irresponsible acts which she tend to dislike.

She loves & respects you, just a matter of time.

Forfavour

Its the way you shout in to a forest that the answer will come out.
you want respect? then you have to respect her too,.
Your mum wants you to report her?
then do that what ever diesion or action your mother takes, she is the Mother of your sister not you.
When you have children you can raise them the way you like.
Am sure you will also not let your mum come to your house and tell you how to handle your kids
Bythe way always reporting is like nagging your people in a big time way.
Am suprised you even have time for her whenn you think of the age gap

actually my younger sister is very nice and loves me so much but i ave a friend that has these same problems.

Try to ignore her.

let it be in your memory that she doesnt exist.

if u can do that, then she will feel the pain and try to be more respectful

I believe that you earn respect not force it.Just try and be tops in everything you do,try to be a good role model for her,that wayshe'd have no choice but to respect you,(u know hoe people associate with success now) she doesnt hate you,its only natural and the way u handle it matters lot.show her some love too,but dont overdo anything or show that you need attention.most importantly,always pray for her.

I believe that you earn respect not force it.Just try and be tops in everything you do,try to be a good role model for her,that way,she'd have no choice but to respect you,(u know how people associate with success now) she doesnt hate you,its only natural and the way u handle it matters a lot.show her some love too,but dont overdo anything or show that you need attention.most importantly,always pray for her.

@POSTER,

sorry to ask, pls how old are and ur sister

i guess most families have gone thru that too. i went thru it as well. am male and i have a youger brother who is 2 yrs younger than i am. back then, he insults me and i beat him up. most annoying thing is that myparents dont see anything wrong in that, they always say "DONT U KNOW U ARE THE ELDEST" but it annoys me the more. at a point i beat him up so much that blood was coming out of his nose, my mother threatened that she was going to get me arrested.

but now we r best of friends, we r both matured now. i cant even remember the last time it happened. we t r now so close. i guess it is cos maturity has set in now, each one us us gives the other due respect.

with time, things will change when maturity sets in

_{are you sure you are really part of the family?}

Just ignore them-your sis and your parent, do your own thing, if possible get your own place and dont pick their calls except u really want to say hi

I had the same problem and wat i did? i knocked them down I have two younger brothers and right like you the one just after me just could not give me due respect, wat did i do? i knocked him down, i mean i really beat him black and blue one day like that, Since then, i got all the respect i didn't before!!!

That was a very long time ago but now we are the best of friends and he even stays with me now and we get along very well. I think all of us first-borns always have this pride issue and wanting all of our sibs and even possibly our parents bow for us, Just be patient sha, i don't know if its same for guys and gurls but i feel you guys will get over it and become best buddies later

ghengis:

I had the same problem and what i did? i knocked them down I have two younger brothers and right like you the one just after me just could not give me due respect, what did i do? i knocked him down, i mean i really beat him black and blue one day like that, Since then, i got all the respect i didn't before!!!
That was a very long time ago but now we are the best of friends and he even stays with me now and we get along very well. I think all of us first-borns always have this pride issue and wanting all of our sibs and even possibly our parents bow for us, Just be patient sha, i don't know if its same for guys and girls but i feel you guys will get over it and become best buddies later

what a way to get respect, you beat the person black and blue huh,

@dis guy
Knocking my bro out was definitely not the best way of earning respect and i'm not claiming its even anythng near that. twas just my own way of letting out my 'frustration' at his continuing dis'in me. Nyways, he stil talks abt it till date and dats definitely not nice

@ poster
grow up and suck it up !!!
life can be worst