Trayceey:
not really. The first time he came to see her, which has been a while now, he didn't come empty handed

Freemasonry:

You see!
He’s not really as stingy as you make it seem.
He probably didn’t think bringing stuff for your mom was a lifelong ritual.
Please lose this mentality and get your mom back.

stupidmod2:
her mom or man

Trayceey:
not really. The first time he came to see her, which has been a while now, he didn't come empty handed

Freemasonry:

Thanks for pointing out the typo.
I have effected the necessary correction.

Trayceey:
not really. The first time he came to see her, which has been a while now, he didn't come empty handed

Mariangeles:
How come nobody understands the principle of giving gifts and the honour that comes with it?
It is not about what you give, it is the thought that counts.
If the young man had brought something as simple as fruits and the woman complained, then she would've been wrong.

It has nothing to do with poverty. Only someone with poverty mentality would think expecting gift(s) from someone is out of place, and only someone with inferiority complex would think it is a thing of shame to except gift from a certain someone.

"A man's gift makes room for him, and brings him before great men"

Giving gifts will make way for you in the presence of Kings and great men.

Trayceey:
He didn't bring anything for her and she was the one who offered him her drink.

Biglittlelois:



I cringed when I saw the bolded, is it that your fiance can't eat in your parent's house? Cos I don't understand what you mean by her drink, una nor dey entertain visitors? Smh!!!

izzou:
I find it funny that you are still defending the irritating attitude your mum displayed

He did not bring any gift (as a boyfriend) and your mum is angry. I wonder what would happen when he marries you

Always apply wisdom, my sister. It's not everything you talk or react to. You could have simply apologized on his behalf and talk to him to apologize to your mum, rather than confront him on why he didn't bring anything.

I just pray you don't ruin a good relationship because of gift

bukatyne:


Ra Ankara ko gba semo

Trayceey:
I'm not defending my mum. You know these mothers always have a hold on us

Mariangeles:


We are Africans. Let us be honest with ourselves.

A man going alone to visit his would-be mother in-law empty handed is a red flag. Something to worry about.
What was the purpose of the visit?
Even as a female, it is still wrong to go visit the mother of the man you're going to marry empty handed.

Biglittlelois:



Giving gifts is not and can never be a compulsory act, it has to come from the heart and the availability of it,

The young man here brought a gift the first time he went to see her, if because of that the mother sees it as a normal routine or occurance, it reeks of entitlement mentality and taking undue advantage of another human,

Op's fiance is right to vent out his anger, he is expected to give gifts when and as he sees fit, not out of compulsion, Op should go and apologise to him.

Biglittlelois:



I cringed when I saw the bolded, is it that your fiance can't eat in your parent's house? Cos I don't understand what you mean by her drink, una nor dey entertain visitors? Smh!!!

ceeceeuwa:

Even #250 bread, the Bobo no fit buy!
Their hate for women on this forum won't make them see reasons.

Mariangeles:


I don't know about the others, but in my tribe (Igbo), that's how things are done.
You don't go to your in-laws bare handed.
It is not an act to be proud of.

Mariangeles:


I don't know about the others, but in my tribe (Igbo), that's how things are done.
You don't go to your in-laws bare handed.
It is not an act to be proud of.

Trayceey:
I'm not a poor woman u fool. I can feed you and your entire family for ages. This is not about being poor. It's about doing the right thing that culture demands. we are Africans

Mariangeles:


I don't know about the others, but in my tribe (Igbo), that's how things are done.
You don't go to your in-laws bare handed.
It is not an act to be proud of.

Mariangeles:


Point out exactly where in my post I implied it was a compulsory act?

"A man's gift makes room for him, and brings him before great men"

Giving gifts will make way for you in the presence of Kings and great men.

Trayceey:
I'm not defending my mum. You know these mothers always have a hold on us

TransAtlanticEx:

Speak for your clan,we don't do that where I come from and I'm also igbo.
We are not beggars and we like to hold our heads up high,
Giving should only come from the givers own volition and not some silly expectation,
Atleast where I come from.

izzou:


Your clan, nne

The intending in-law must not bring something everytime he visits.

Biglittlelois:


So why did you make it seem as if anytime he didn't give gifts it won't bring him before great men or make a way for him as you typed below?




All those times he gave gifts doesn't count? Or he should constantly give his future mother in law in other to be favoured, or cos she wants and says so?

izzou:


Your clan, nne

The intending in-law must not bring something everytime he visits.

Mariangeles:


Don't play smart with me.

If you can't comprehend my words, ignore it.

Biglittlelois:



And you're trying and failing woefully to be smart by half,

Next time, choose your words carefully if you don't want to be quoted, you do not and cannot control what I do on my phone.