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I Lost My Boyfriend And It Was All My Fault - Romance (6) - Nairaland

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Re: I Lost My Boyfriend And It Was All My Fault by PrimadonnaO(f): 10:18pm On Mar 30, 2021
BigCabal:
How we met
It took me three years to get admission into the university. During that time, I was attending a tutorial in Ibadan, and that is how I met Paul, a friend of my friend. My friend introduced us and we got really close. After talking for a while, I discovered I like him. The feelings were mutual, so we started dating on my birthday, November 7th. I had just clocked 18, he was 17, and I wasn’t looking for a relationship then, but I just knew I couldn’t let Paul go away.

The thing is; I have suffered emotional abuse and have been depressed for a while now. I have been molested twice, and I couldn’t even tell my own mother because she was always so harsh towards me. It got so bad that I even had to leave home to stay with my aunt. I had attempted suicide twice, and I have a lot of insecurities. Paul was there for me anytime I needed someone to talk to. He loved me and I always wondered why. He knows all my flaws, but I still could not understand why he loves me so much.

The first mistake
It was the best relationship I ever had. He was understanding, helped with my depression and academics. We never had serious fights, just a few misunderstandings over little things. Everything was going good for a year until I met some guy on Facebook, John. John and I started talking, and the chats progressed to the point where he asked me to send him nudes. I sent some with my face hidden because I was so sure I would never see him in real life. He lived in Lagos, I lived in Ibadan, and I didn’t plan on sleeping with him. Unfortunately for me, he attended the same secondary school as Paul. One day, John posted my picture on his WhatsApp status, and Paul saw it. Paul asked how he knew me, and John told him everything. Paul forgave me, but I knew he was hurt.

The second mistake
In 2019, I finally got admission into University, but I somehow got scammed of my acceptance fee. I couldn’t tell my parents or Paul because I felt so stupid. Instead, lied to him that my parents couldn’t pay the acceptance fee, I couldn’t tell him the truth. Covid-19 came, so schools couldn’t resume and the deadline for payment was up. I was planning on running away cause of shame, so I wanted to break up with Paul. I was stressed. One day I went to see a friend, and I ended up drinking with him. We almost had sex, but I was on my period so it didn’t happen. I initially didn’t tell Paul about it, but I eventually told him about how I went drinking and how I almost cheated. He was disappointed but forgave me.

The third mistake
The money for the initial acceptance fee was something I eventually raised, but because I was paying late, the price had increased. I was so desperate, and because my parents were having financial issues, I was ready to sleep with anyone for money for my school fees. Then, I met this guy who promised to take care of me, and I slept with him thinking he’ll help. I keep texting and sexting him so he would feel interested, but hasn’t said anything. This led to me breaking up with Paul. I told him it was because I needed time to be alone, but it was really because I couldn’t tell him I cheated on him.

The end
Paul and I eventually got back together, but it was because he did not know I cheated. He found out after reading my chats, so he left. I tried explaining to him how I only did it because I was desperate, but he thought I chose the man over him.

I feel bad and selfish about what I did. He deserved better than me, and I wish he listened when I told him before we started dating. This is just the kind of person I am. When I think of the fact that the person I slept with didn’t even give me any money, I feel I lost both ways.

I will probably sink deeper into depression because I finally lost the only person that ever cared. Paul is a good person that didn’t deserve any of the things I put him through. If I say I love him, it’ll surely look like a lie because you don’t hurt those you love, but I love him. I should just have done better.

https://www.zikoko.com/her/i-lost-my-boyfriend-and-it-was-all-my-fault/

I know Zikoko is a magazine that publishes true life stories, so the actual person in this story may not be on Nairaland, but this is what I have to say, for the benefit of people who may have been in similar situations.

See, when you "cheat" in a relationship, your guilt shouldn't be that you hurt the other person, because in the real sense it was your very own self you messed up.

A relationship is a relationship... when they find out that you cheated, they walk away very easily... nothing holding them back.
But who's got an extra body count?
Who will be a topic of discussion at joints?
Who gets to deal with the guilt?
All you!

It's only to a married partner you'd have done an injustice to, in addition to doing yourself an injustice.

Having said that, no matter how pressed you are for money, it is better to be a bambiala than to sleep with anybody for it.
Pocket your shame or pride or whatever, and beg people for the money.

Some won't help you, some will make insinuations.. move on from them. Don't consider it.

When you never consider sex or crime or its vices as a way to get by, there'll always be other ways for you to get things sorted out..

It may be a little harder o... and you may suffer a little, but your dignity will be intact...

5 Likes

Re: I Lost My Boyfriend And It Was All My Fault by chaloskyx: 10:19pm On Mar 30, 2021
WE KNOW YOU LOVE PAUL BYT YOU LOVE MONEY MORE SO KEEP SLEEPING AROUND FOR MONEY TILL YOUR BANK ACCOUNT IS FILLED AND YOUR VIRTUE AS A WOMAN IS ALL USED UP UP TILL THEN LEAVE BROTHER PAUL ALONE FOR SISTER MARY. THANK YOU

1 Like

Re: I Lost My Boyfriend And It Was All My Fault by TheStranger: 10:24pm On Mar 30, 2021
So finally all boys are not the same grin grin cheesy grin
Re: I Lost My Boyfriend And It Was All My Fault by PrimadonnaO(f): 10:30pm On Mar 30, 2021
AK481:

You met Paul, met John , I guess the guy you had sex with should be Peter or James .


They use pseudonyms to hide the identity of the narrators.
Re: I Lost My Boyfriend And It Was All My Fault by dondavinchi(m): 10:32pm On Mar 30, 2021
u b olosho leave plenty talk
Re: I Lost My Boyfriend And It Was All My Fault by Valsmith1990: 10:38pm On Mar 30, 2021
don't worry let me fry groundnut for u
Re: I Lost My Boyfriend And It Was All My Fault by Yusman316(m): 10:45pm On Mar 30, 2021
firstratedcitiz:
People should learn to keep their issues to themselves and stop bothering us with their private matters.
Bro, it's called depression. Once a person is depressed, he/she needs someone to talk to or else they start having suicidal thoughts

1 Like

Re: I Lost My Boyfriend And It Was All My Fault by Yusman316(m): 10:46pm On Mar 30, 2021
EmmaxKeys:
This post is unreal. Mere fanciful thinking. But good job, op.
My thought too
Re: I Lost My Boyfriend And It Was All My Fault by GreenDee(f): 10:47pm On Mar 30, 2021
NiRfreak:
And what are we suppose to do
I tire oo, lol, we should now fry chips and twerk ni
Re: I Lost My Boyfriend And It Was All My Fault by lizychimamanda(f): 10:51pm On Mar 30, 2021
This my gender self angry
All u need now is Jesus
You need to be whole again
Re: I Lost My Boyfriend And It Was All My Fault by priestcharm(m): 10:52pm On Mar 30, 2021
Utmost bullshit. Sorry this is real you and an average lady has the tendency to cheat but some still choose to use their brains. So what if you're a man, you will go and sleep with a sugar Mummy because you need money? Enough of this feminine rubbish. Like someone clearly stated, you be Olosho, stop using your past to justify what you did. As for Paul, just let her go, she doesn't deserve you

1 Like

Re: I Lost My Boyfriend And It Was All My Fault by IgboWarlord(m): 11:04pm On Mar 30, 2021
Elliot2:
Circumstances help unveil our real colors. So my dear, na olosho u be. You, chastity, fidelity and true love no get any business for this life.

Re: I Lost My Boyfriend And It Was All My Fault by YoungDaNaval(m): 11:05pm On Mar 30, 2021
Nice guys eat last grin
Re: I Lost My Boyfriend And It Was All My Fault by Tobilobas(m): 11:10pm On Mar 30, 2021
Elliot2:
Circumstances help unveil our real colors. So my dear, na olosho u be. You, chastity, fidelity and true love no get any business for this life.
med o
Re: I Lost My Boyfriend And It Was All My Fault by Nobody: 11:11pm On Mar 30, 2021
O.L.O.S.H.O shocked
Re: I Lost My Boyfriend And It Was All My Fault by HeavenlyCherub(f): 11:12pm On Mar 30, 2021
BigCabal:
How we met
It took me three years to get admission into the university. During that time, I was attending a tutorial in Ibadan, and that is how I met Paul, a friend of my friend. My friend introduced us and we got really close. After talking for a while, I discovered I like him. The feelings were mutual, so we started dating on my birthday, November 7th. I had just clocked 18, he was 17, and I wasn’t looking for a relationship then, but I just knew I couldn’t let Paul go away.

The thing is; I have suffered emotional abuse and have been depressed for a while now. I have been molested twice, and I couldn’t even tell my own mother because she was always so harsh towards me. It got so bad that I even had to leave home to stay with my aunt. I had attempted suicide twice, and I have a lot of insecurities. Paul was there for me anytime I needed someone to talk to. He loved me and I always wondered why. He knows all my flaws, but I still could not understand why he loves me so much.

The first mistake
It was the best relationship I ever had. He was understanding, helped with my depression and academics. We never had serious fights, just a few misunderstandings over little things. Everything was going good for a year until I met some guy on Facebook, John. John and I started talking, and the chats progressed to the point where he asked me to send him nudes. I sent some with my face hidden because I was so sure I would never see him in real life. He lived in Lagos, I lived in Ibadan, and I didn’t plan on sleeping with him. Unfortunately for me, he attended the same secondary school as Paul. One day, John posted my picture on his WhatsApp status, and Paul saw it. Paul asked how he knew me, and John told him everything. Paul forgave me, but I knew he was hurt.

The second mistake
In 2019, I finally got admission into University, but I somehow got scammed of my acceptance fee. I couldn’t tell my parents or Paul because I felt so stupid. Instead, lied to him that my parents couldn’t pay the acceptance fee, I couldn’t tell him the truth. Covid-19 came, so schools couldn’t resume and the deadline for payment was up. I was planning on running away cause of shame, so I wanted to break up with Paul. I was stressed. One day I went to see a friend, and I ended up drinking with him. We almost had sex, but I was on my period so it didn’t happen. I initially didn’t tell Paul about it, but I eventually told him about how I went drinking and how I almost cheated. He was disappointed but forgave me.

The third mistake
The money for the initial acceptance fee was something I eventually raised, but because I was paying late, the price had increased. I was so desperate, and because my parents were having financial issues, I was ready to sleep with anyone for money for my school fees. Then, I met this guy who promised to take care of me, and I slept with him thinking he’ll help. I keep texting and sexting him so he would feel interested, but hasn’t said anything. This led to me breaking up with Paul. I told him it was because I needed time to be alone, but it was really because I couldn’t tell him I cheated on him.

The end
Paul and I eventually got back together, but it was because he did not know I cheated. He found out after reading my chats, so he left. I tried explaining to him how I only did it because I was desperate, but he thought I chose the man over him.

I feel bad and selfish about what I did. He deserved better than me, and I wish he listened when I told him before we started dating. This is just the kind of person I am. When I think of the fact that the person I slept with didn’t even give me any money, I feel I lost both ways.

I will probably sink deeper into depression because I finally lost the only person that ever cared. Paul is a good person that didn’t deserve any of the things I put him through. If I say I love him, it’ll surely look like a lie because you don’t hurt those you love, but I love him. I should just have done better.

https://www.zikoko.com/her/i-lost-my-boyfriend-and-it-was-all-my-fault/

The crazy thing.. is women like you normally tend to get the best guys....LIFE
Re: I Lost My Boyfriend And It Was All My Fault by YoungDaNaval(m): 11:13pm On Mar 30, 2021
annayawchee:
Exactly what my ex did but the only twist was that her own friend told me about her cheating spree a day after I ended everything with her....

I realized girls don't value the naturally good guys..

They want the demons and demons they shall get cry undecided lipsrsealed
Gbam!!!!
Re: I Lost My Boyfriend And It Was All My Fault by Kayberg: 11:15pm On Mar 30, 2021
9jaRealist:

It’s made up, that’s why! grin >
No… You won't understand.
Re: I Lost My Boyfriend And It Was All My Fault by TheGift: 11:17pm On Mar 30, 2021
Maybe Paul is only meant to be your friend not your boy-friend, fiance or husband. HE may be good for you, but are you good for Him? BE careful about using Him as a crutch. There is a season and a time for everything and maybe it's time to grow.

I think you should use this time to find out what it is you really want, out of life and love, what your priorities are and what they should be.... You can't eat your cake and have it. I wish you all the best.

P.S. Why send your nudes to a guy though? Like seriously? I am trying to understand what makes young girls do such clueless things now-a-days.

BigCabal:
How we met
It took me three years to get admission into the university. During that time, I was attending a tutorial in Ibadan, and that is how I met Paul, a friend of my friend. My friend introduced us and we got really close. After talking for a while, I discovered I like him. The feelings were mutual, so we started dating on my birthday, November 7th. I had just clocked 18, he was 17, and I wasn’t looking for a relationship then, but I just knew I couldn’t let Paul go away.

The thing is; I have suffered emotional abuse and have been depressed for a while now. I have been molested twice, and I couldn’t even tell my own mother because she was always so harsh towards me. It got so bad that I even had to leave home to stay with my aunt. I had attempted suicide twice, and I have a lot of insecurities. Paul was there for me anytime I needed someone to talk to. He loved me and I always wondered why. He knows all my flaws, but I still could not understand why he loves me so much.

The first mistake
It was the best relationship I ever had. He was understanding, helped with my depression and academics. We never had serious fights, just a few misunderstandings over little things. Everything was going good for a year until I met some guy on Facebook, John. John and I started talking, and the chats progressed to the point where he asked me to send him nudes. I sent some with my face hidden because I was so sure I would never see him in real life. He lived in Lagos, I lived in Ibadan, and I didn’t plan on sleeping with him. Unfortunately for me, he attended the same secondary school as Paul. One day, John posted my picture on his WhatsApp status, and Paul saw it. Paul asked how he knew me, and John told him everything. Paul forgave me, but I knew he was hurt.

The second mistake
In 2019, I finally got admission into University, but I somehow got scammed of my acceptance fee. I couldn’t tell my parents or Paul because I felt so stupid. Instead, lied to him that my parents couldn’t pay the acceptance fee, I couldn’t tell him the truth. Covid-19 came, so schools couldn’t resume and the deadline for payment was up. I was planning on running away cause of shame, so I wanted to break up with Paul. I was stressed. One day I went to see a friend, and I ended up drinking with him. We almost had sex, but I was on my period so it didn’t happen. I initially didn’t tell Paul about it, but I eventually told him about how I went drinking and how I almost cheated. He was disappointed but forgave me.

The third mistake
The money for the initial acceptance fee was something I eventually raised, but because I was paying late, the price had increased. I was so desperate, and because my parents were having financial issues, I was ready to sleep with anyone for money for my school fees. Then, I met this guy who promised to take care of me, and I slept with him thinking he’ll help. I keep texting and sexting him so he would feel interested, but hasn’t said anything. This led to me breaking up with Paul. I told him it was because I needed time to be alone, but it was really because I couldn’t tell him I cheated on him.

The end
Paul and I eventually got back together, but it was because he did not know I cheated. He found out after reading my chats, so he left. I tried explaining to him how I only did it because I was desperate, but he thought I chose the man over him.

I feel bad and selfish about what I did. He deserved better than me, and I wish he listened when I told him before we started dating. This is just the kind of person I am. When I think of the fact that the person I slept with didn’t even give me any money, I feel I lost both ways.

I will probably sink deeper into depression because I finally lost the only person that ever cared. Paul is a good person that didn’t deserve any of the things I put him through. If I say I love him, it’ll surely look like a lie because you don’t hurt those you love, but I love him. I should just have done better.

https://www.zikoko.com/her/i-lost-my-boyfriend-and-it-was-all-my-fault/
Re: I Lost My Boyfriend And It Was All My Fault by Emperor88(m): 11:29pm On Mar 30, 2021
GodWrites:


You need a chilled beer
Walahi He deserves a crate instead
Re: I Lost My Boyfriend And It Was All My Fault by annayawchee: 11:43pm On Mar 30, 2021
YoungDaNaval:
Gbam!!!!
I always wonder what this girls really want though...

Been good and gentle doesn't tick their box.
Lol they will take you for a ride and thank God I've moved on fully but something has changed...

I pity the next girl that will grace my life wink cheesy
Re: I Lost My Boyfriend And It Was All My Fault by Franklydes(m): 11:44pm On Mar 30, 2021
Please don't be harder on this girl, she is even bold enough to say the truth so don't judge her. She only needs help. Please you can WhatsApp me on this number for a therapy section 08173686165
Re: I Lost My Boyfriend And It Was All My Fault by Proflere: 11:50pm On Mar 30, 2021
Elliot2:
Circumstances help unveil our real colors. So my dear, na olosho u be. You, chastity, fidelity and true love no get any business for this life.
Yes sir, the holy spirit say I should tell you that with this kind of bluntness, you fit no enter heaven grin grin grin grin

1 Like

Re: I Lost My Boyfriend And It Was All My Fault by Elliot2(m): 12:00am On Mar 31, 2021
Proflere:
Yes sir, the holy spirit say I should tell you that with this kind of bluntness, you fit no enter heaven grin grin grin grin
I go create teñt for outside heaven gate.

1 Like

Re: I Lost My Boyfriend And It Was All My Fault by HacheNoire: 12:18am On Mar 31, 2021
Telegram234:
So what do u want us to do now?

Thanks for the question!

I appreciate you!

Of what essence is the whole epistle?

May be she should share his address so we all can go kneel down and beg on her behalf.
Re: I Lost My Boyfriend And It Was All My Fault by ZooOga: 12:53am On Mar 31, 2021
nollywood script story #9987654321. next. cheesy
Re: I Lost My Boyfriend And It Was All My Fault by udemzyudex(m): 1:20am On Mar 31, 2021
9jaRealist:


Because we both already know the answer? grin grin grin
>

I don't understand what you're talking about.
Re: I Lost My Boyfriend And It Was All My Fault by hartlyn(m): 1:57am On Mar 31, 2021
You've learnt your lesson. Just move on
Re: I Lost My Boyfriend And It Was All My Fault by Gr8Nez(m): 4:24am On Mar 31, 2021
okoroemeka:
actually someone can love his partner but still cheat, cheating to some people is just a reflex action that after the deed is done, they will not attach any emotional ties to his or her fellow cheater,many people can't just be judged with conventional morality to rate the percentage of love they have for their spouses,many good wife's really love their husbands but they will cheat for promotion,contracts, appointments,favours,etc,
you dey talk sha just read wetin you talk,na person like you go hang when dey cheat on am
Re: I Lost My Boyfriend And It Was All My Fault by dharmie135: 4:34am On Mar 31, 2021
OriginalZombiE:


The paul sef na mumu.
How many times them go cheat on u before u give yourself brain?
The guy fit never even straff the op
I mean wtf
It's not much of the guys fault. Girls like to play games at you alot.. It's up to him know for how long he's gon keep up... But Op seriously you messed up o. Well sha I won't judge you... But you look like person wey dem don over pamper to me my opinion my question is what valid reason why would you agree to sex cause of losing your acceptance fee and you didn't let your parents know? They won't have allowed you gone through such and it's most likely you usually don't weigh the consequences of actions with outcome at all?
Re: I Lost My Boyfriend And It Was All My Fault by Mac2016(m): 4:44am On Mar 31, 2021
Tonymegabush1:
Hard copy., Don't be too nice with a lady you are dating to avoid been taking for granted
It makes them feel you're not a prize to be won and all humans love what seems to be a prize to aspire for. Solution: make yourself so unpredictable... Reading "Art of seduction" might be to the rescue!

1 Like

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