https://www.nairaland.com/6514332/she-pregnant-another-guy-love

Following the above post and the poster's encounter with the said lady and more issues surrounding married couples which made me come up with this thread, What do you think could be the cause surrounding barrenness or complications before, during and after childbirth?

There are more Baby mamas nowadays than couples who legally got married traditionally.

I was having discussion with a group of friends about family and child bearing before this question came into me and I threw it to the audience which they found difficult to come up with an answer. And before creating this thread, I just asked my married friend whose reply is "This question is meant for the highly intelligent".


I've known many guys who had kids outside wedlock successfully and their baby mamas had no complications whatsoever.

I've also known many baby mamas who are still alive after childbirth.

I've seen most married couples give testimonies after many years of marriage. Why must it take that long for the legally married? Why?

And I've seen baby mamas not give testimonies after giving birth like the "Hebrew women". They can be yawning and a baby will drop out.

They can be sweeping or playing whot and a baby will stroll out and it's not a Biggie for them.

The big picture is that baby mamas don't usually experience miscarriages sef. That's the most surprising part.

There's this couple who moved into our family house as tenants some years ago, they were traditionally married. They had expected a baby together but the results had been miscarriages after miscarriages. They were later advised to get wedded as they had sought God's presence before then. After the mass wedding, it's been many years again without conception. Miscarriages after miscarriages. I became very sorry for the couple.

I do know God works in mysterious ways. But there are something I do not understand at all.

This thing don tire me. I'm thinking between having kids and not get married though.

WHY DO MOST LEGALLY MARRIED COUPLES EXPERIENCE COMPLICATIONS DURING CHILDBIRTH?

I believe the reason you hear of pregnant baby mamas is because of the scandals attached to it.

The same way you hear about couples struggling to have children is because we notice they don't.

It doesn't mean there are single girls having sex without protection but have never gotten pregnant. It's when such women get married that they realize they have infertility issues.

In most cases, the women are not the problem. In our part of the world, we blame the women for infertility meanwhile, there are cases where the man is the one with issues.

Some single women live reckless lives and don't have children when they marry, some marry and have plenty children. It is not anyone's fault.

Romanoff:
I believe the reason you here of pregnant baby mamas is because of the scandals attached to it.

The same way you hear about couples struggling to have children is because we notice they don't.

It doesn't mean there are single girls having sex without protection but have never gotten pregnant. It's when such women get married that they realize they have infertility issues.

In most cases, the women are not the problem. In our part of the world, we blame the women for infertility meanwhile, there are cases where the man is the one with issues.

Some single women live reckless lives and don't have children when they marry, some marry and have plenty children. It is not anyone's fault.

Lol. You are very wise. While dating the boyfriend might be thinking his pull-out game is A+. It is in marriage either of them would realize there is a problem.

Romanoff:
I believe the reason you here of pregnant baby mamas is because of the scandals attached to it.

The same way you hear about couples struggling to have children is because we notice they don't.

It doesn't mean there are single girls having sex without protection but have never gotten pregnant. It's when such women get married that they realize they have infertility issues.

In most cases, the women are not the problem. In our part of the world, we blame the women for infertility meanwhile, there are cases where the man is the one with issues.

Some single women live reckless lives and don't have children when they marry, some marry and have plenty children. It is not anyone's fault.

Your ascertion is not far fetched.

I practically have 2 guys who one of them has 2 baby mamas with a kid each and the other guy has just gone for his woman's traditional marriage this year after 2 kids. I do not know when the first guy would tie the knot.

Yet, I've seen a sane couple who did their rites accordingly but no kid. The woman wasn't promiscuous. She was a decent lady.

Like I said, there are things I do not know yet.

lalasticlala front page please for more audience and contribution.

The way I see it is that most baby mamas are still in their fertile period and some of those married ladies are usually no longer as fertile and also have past "secrets" hence the urgent need to settle down.

pocohantas:


Lol. You are very wise. While dating the boyfriend might be thinking his pull-out game is A+. It is in marriage either of them would realize there is a problem.

You are one of the wisest people around here. You made me see his reasons clearer. Nwanne m nwaanyi.

Romanoff's posts are always backed with wisdom.

My friend's opinion about seeking from "intelligent people" is not bad afterall.

yomi007k:
The way I see it is that most baby mamas are still in their fertile period and some of those married ladies are usually no longer as fertile and also have past "secrets" hence the urgent need to settle down.

Not particularly.

I am a baby mama too,i have had a still birth and 2 miscarriages.my friend comfort(R.I.P)died with pregnancy in d year 2014.Baby mamas also have pregnancy complications but we are not proud of talking about it because getting pregnant before marriage is a shame on its own.

bjprodint1:
I am a baby mama too,i have had a still birth and 2 miscarriages.my friend comfort(R.I.P)died with pregnancy in d year 2014.Baby mamas also have pregnancy complications but we are not proud of talking about it because getting pregnant before marriage is a shame on its own.

it's very sad hearing about your experience. I commend your bravery, input and transparency.

Thank you for shedding light on this topic.

aboyaji:
it's very sad hearing about your experience. I commend your bravery, input and transparency.

Thank you for shedding light on this topic.

Smiles

Aside from some valid points above, you should know that the devil is not happy when two become one, he feels threatened by what it could produce.
Marriage is under attack by the devil and while some of these problems are due to natural causes, a huge percentage is as a result of devilish manipulations..
Tell you what, a couple having fertility issues, God forbid but if the man sleeps with a woman outside, she will most likely get pregnant, if the wife does same, it will most likely result also in pregnancy.
There are forces beyond the physical eyes and that's why one should be spiritually alive.

There aren’t more birth complications outside of marriage than in it. That’s unfounded “statistics “

cococandy:
There aren’t more birth complications outside of marriage than in it. That’s unfounded “statistics “

The OP confused the topic I think.

He meant to type "Why are there more birth complications in marriage than outside marriage"

The truth is, the same reason those people got married first is what's holding them down for years "decency" and faith.


A girl that got pregnant outside marriage is probably having sex with different men. So, if man A is impotent, man B can get her pregnant. Same with the guys.

In marriage, chances are one of the couple is the one with the fertility problem but because they are decent and don't want to cheat on each other, they will continue to do the same thing for years while expecting different result.

BTW, there's no way to know the fertility status of a single person. It's only when they have a child that you will tag them a single parent.

As for why they don't experience complications while giving birth, it can be attributed to life in general. People mostly have what they don't want and what they desperately need run far away from them.

The very first comment of this thread by Romanoff is the answer to this social milieu.

You take notice of one group because they in position to fulfill that role according to social order and we pay less attention to the other group of female because of societal taboo nature of pregnancy outside wedlock.

because outside marriage, people don't usually look forward to having kids like in marriage and as such, no need to put keen attention to complications

Some see kids as fruits of marriage.

some of the complications in marriage are results of incidences or actions some took when they were single.

Again, this is Africa, sh*ts happens in this part of the world and don't forget that people; family, friends, neighbours etc put eye in married couples more than the singles.

etc

Pacesetter2021:
Aside from some valid points above, you should know that the devil is not happy when two become one, he feels threatened by what it could produce.
Marriage is under attack by the devil and while some of these problems are due to natural causes, a huge percentage is as a result of devilish manipulations..
Tell you what, a couple having fertility issues, God forbid but if the man sleeps with a woman outside, she will most likely get pregnant, if the wife does same, it will most likely result also in pregnancy.
There are forces beyond the physical eyes and that's why one should be spiritually alive.

well said

PuZZyNegro:


The OP confused the topic I think.

He meant to type "Why are there more birth complications in marriage than outside marriage"

The truth is, the same reason those people got married first is what's holding them down for years "decency" and faith.


A girl that got pregnant outside marriage is probably having sex with different men. So, if man A is impotent, man B can get her pregnant. Same with the guys.

In marriage, chances are one of the couple is the one with the fertility problem but because they are decent and don't want to cheat on each other, they will continue to do the same thing for years while expecting different result.

BTW, there's no way to know the fertility status of a single person. It's only when they have a child that you will tag them a single parent.

As for why they don't experience complications while giving birth, it can be attributed to life in general. People mostly have what they don't want and what they desperately need run far away from them.

Corrections made. Your point is very valid.

Pacesetter2021:
Aside from some valid points above, you should know that the devil is not happy when two become one, he feels threatened by what it could produce.
Marriage is under attack by the devil and while some of these problems are due to natural causes, a huge percentage is as a result of devilish manipulations..
Tell you what, a couple having fertility issues, God forbid but if the man sleeps with a woman outside, she will most likely get pregnant, if the wife does same, it will most likely result also in pregnancy.
There are forces beyond the physical eyes and that's why one should be spiritually alive.

Thank you. That's true. I intentionally didn't include the spiritual aspect of it.

cococandy:
There aren’t more birth complications outside of marriage than in it. That’s unfounded “statistics “

That was actually a typo. I've made some corrections.