I am sorry, I am not quite sure where to post this but its back and pain so I figured heath section would work. Dear Mods, no dey offended if I make mistake. If no be here put am where e need be.

Hey guys, so my back has been killing me of late. I initially thought this was caused by my recent increased consumption of Schweppes (Virgin Mojito flavor). However, after cutting off my supply and riding my bike about 40km over the last few days…guess what? My back still hurts.

Time to hit the oracle and find out what is doing me. I open up google and type “LOWER BACK PAIN). You know there is a reason they tell you not to google your symptoms, right? You don’t listen. We neither do I. Apparently my problem may require surgery if symptoms don’t clear out within four weeks. I’m already rounding off the second week!!

So clearly google dey mad!

So I do the next thing any educated young man with mind bending back pain will do. I open up WhatsApp and ask a friend for advice. You know how we all have that one idiot that is in super shape, can’t get fat and seems to always never get sick…no? Well, I have one of such and he tells me to take this agbo (herbal concoction). I take it o. I take it like it’s a six-pack of my favorite Schweppes (which by now I am beginning to doubt was responsible for my predicament). Do I need to mention that it tastes like bile? No? Good. It was so bitter even my teeth tasted wrong for an hour after.

I am very amazed. This has to be science. Apart from the very embarrassingly smelling incident that occurred a bit too frequently in the rest room the next day, I would say the AGBO DID NOT WORK!! I think I lost some weight though. (To Do list: Get a scale) (To Do List to Do: New blog post about weighing 90kg to the Glory of God).

I admit I was really stumped at this point. The pain was getting worse and there was no end in sight. I don’t take painkillers, mostly because I am superman’s junior brother but also because I fear I may abuse them, and I don’t think I would make a very attractive drug addict.

Then I had a conversation with a friend and just like that the cause revealed itself.

Guess what was causing my back pain…MY OFFICE CHAIR!!!

Honestly, e shock me. I use it every day. Admittedly, the chair is in terrible condition. The rollers are broken unevenly which makes the chair wobble, the cushion is all but flat and the lumber support is more a requirement than actual support. I have been spending a lot of hours in this chair over the last few weeks o. My poor back.

I finally decided it was time to change my trusty old bumbum device. I hope into jumia and what do I see? The chair costs 95,000 Naira and is on discount from its 120,000 Naira original price!!! Wait o, it is chair I want to buy o not conference room. I do some more searching and to my dismay, no be scam o. Chairs are expensive.

I have decided to go to the market tomorrow and see for myself.

Meanwhile, the takeaway from my back pain for you is this: Chairs are expensive!!
Please stop using them anyhow. When your employer has spent all this money to provide you with such a basic and most important work tool (that protects you from back pain), the least you can do is use It properly.

• If you are in the habit of leaning back in awkward angles that may break the struts, stop.
• If you are on the big side, get a chair that can carry your weight. The smaller chairs with smaller frames tend to break after a while if you are too heavy.
• It is not a toy. Stop spinning in your chair
• It is also not a car. Get up and walk to the photocopier Brenda. Stop rolling the chair all the way.
• Mr Michel, you and your sweaty bumbum will spoil the leather, use a cotton cloth between your sweaty self and the chair.
• It is one person to a chair, stop sitting on the arm of the chair.

Look I know you lot wish you had better jobs and salaries and you may feel taking care of your chair is not your business after all they will change it. But just think for a moment, if it was you buying the chair for over 100,000 Naira, how would you treat the chair now?

To all the employers out there. God will bless you for protecting our backs.

Now I am accepting donations for my new chair. The one I like costs 150,000 Naira.

Thank you for attending my TedTalk!!!

Lala, please move to front page so others can learn.

Most guys are just careless about their health they wait till it's worse before they act.

And I guess you didn't do an intensive Google search on your back pain because if you did you wouldn't have gone through all those stress.

I mean I just search the term "major causes of back pain" and amongst the results that popped up includes 'prolonged sitting'

See the image attached.

... But then you missed it like Yakubu Aiyegbemie.

Google is actually one of the best places to seek first aid from especially if you're isolated or can't access healthcare immediately.

It was even Google that taught me it was better to use cold/ice compress on inflammations like when you have Koko on the head, or sprained ankle. Before na so so hot water press. Injury wey suppose last 2/3 days go take almost 2 weeks because of say we no sabi use Google

When using Google for health issues, use elimination method to remove the options or suggestions that are far off from the symptoms you feel till you have 1 or 2 options that best suits your case
.

Then move with those 2 till you figure shit out

CandyOps:
Most guys are just careless about their health they wait till it's worse before they act.

And I guess you didn't do an intensive Google search on your back pain because if you did you wouldn't have gone through all those stress.

I mean I just search the term "major causes of back pain" and amongst the results that popped up includes 'prolonged sitting'

See the image attached.

... But then you missed it like Yakubu Aiyegbemie.

Google is actually one of the best places to seek first aid from especially if you're isolated or can't access healthcare immediately.

It was even Google that taught me it was better to use cold/ice compress on inflammations like when you have Koko on the head, or sprained ankle. Before na so so hot water press. Injury wey suppose last 2/3 days go take almost 2 weeks because of say we no sabi use Google

When using Google for health issues, use elimination method to remove the options or suggestions that are far off from the symptoms you feel till you have 1 or 2 options that best suits your case
.

Then move with those 2 till you figure shit out

We learn everyday. Thank you sir

BadyBoy:
Indeed, back and knee pains happen to many sportspeople. Even if you subconsciously let go of the pain and your body is fully recovered there can appear phantom pains. Several years ago, I injured my knee and treated it for a long time. I did physiotherapy, massages, took medicine, and even ordered a knee brace for regular use https://remaininthegame.ca/product-category/orthopedic-bracing-support/knee-brace-support-splint/. I was lucky, and my leg stopped hurting over time, and I was able to return to my usual way of life. But sometimes, it seems to me that it aches and hurts, and I try to understand why I feel it.

Thanks for sharing. You are right. Could you tell me some more information about it? Let’s talk in PM