Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New
Stats: 3,148,845 members, 7,802,697 topics. Date: Friday, 19 April 2024 at 07:12 PM

What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? - Jokes Etc (8) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Entertainment / Jokes Etc / What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? (58744 Views)

What’s The Worst April Fool Prank That Almost Made You Cry? / #WorstBeatingOfMyLife: Nigerians share worst beating of their lives / Fully Coded Armed Guy's Stole The Worst Thing Ever (2) (3) (4)

(1) (2) (3) ... (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) (Reply) (Go Down)

Re: What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? by MartinsOlaeuyi: 8:47pm On May 30, 2021
well, mine was my father.
I was pretending to be sleeping on the couch in the living room. He was on phone with someone and he called my name just to confirm if I was sleeping or not.

While I was eavesdropping on his conversation, I heard him telling someone else I love you, kisses on the phone and reminding the person that he's going to be at her place the following day. Meanwhile, my mum was in the kitchen cooking.

As papa cut call, I just normal normal standup.

26 Likes

Re: What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? by Nobody: 8:50pm On May 30, 2021
michaelpop50:

Jesus. 9 years is such a long time oh.
Yea, i was 10 then

3 Likes

Re: What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? by SefunmiHookups: 8:52pm On May 30, 2021
poshestmina:


Yes.
Igbo
Yoruba.
My native language.
Ibibio
a little Hausa(I understand but can't speak fluently).

Haa. Oti oh.
Pls, come teach me my language (Ibibio)for free oh, ejor edakun.
I'm half Ibibio and half Omoluabi .
I abandoned learning Hausa language. The aim was defeated already (to win over hearts of fine Hausa girls) That's in the past.

3 Likes

Re: What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? by AMI3(m): 8:53pm On May 30, 2021
t2u234:
Have you ever thought of the possibility of watching YouTube videos and using other Android apps and streaming movies on your flat screen TV?

Yes! It is very possible.

Read on.

With this massive 4gig RAM and 64gig ROM Android TV box, your TV watching experience changes into something completely new!

This particular model goes for 30-35k in the market, but we're selling it to you at 25k!

Just call or Whatsapp Teninteni Stores Nig Ltd on 09076097877 to make your order.

We're based in Ibadan but can ship to anywhere in Nigeria.
Does it require data
Re: What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? by Plebian(f): 8:54pm On May 30, 2021
AdeOri99:

No b only US.
as i am presently, havn't tasted no food since morning, that is to show you how i am suffering presently.

but i am still in my early 20s, full of hope and working towards achieving my dream.

Some people are just bitter and intollerant, i can't begin to explain how much i suffered in the hand of this woman.
She literally killed me.
my brother is scarred from the years of torture he endured from my father's wife, I do not understand why people have so much hate, or why the world is the way it is, all I can say is it will get better.

3 Likes

Re: What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? by SefunmiHookups: 8:56pm On May 30, 2021
michaelpop50:


Na you sabi. I dey take my revenge here on earth.
hahahaha grin grin grincheesy cheesy
Evils...
Re: What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? by Nobody: 8:59pm On May 30, 2021
Plebian:
my brother is scarred from the year of torture he endured from my father's wife, I do not understand why people have so much hate, or why the world is the way it is, all I can say is it will get better.
It's actually leads to psychological damage, i had to go through a lot of experience, before i am able to overcome mine.
Thank you

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? by SefunmiHookups: 9:00pm On May 30, 2021
Damn

1 Like

Re: What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? by UDUJ(m): 9:04pm On May 30, 2021
MartinsOlaeuyi:
well, mine was my father.
I was pretending to be sleeping on the couch in the living room. He was on phone with someone and he called my name just to confirm if I was sleeping or not.

While I was eavesdropping on his conversation, I heard him telling someone else I love you, kisses on the phone and reminding the person that he's going to be at her place the following day. Meanwhile, my mum was in the kitchen cooking.

As papa cut call, I just normal normal standup.

grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin Your dad is a guy man cheesy

2 Likes

Re: What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? by NewDelhi(m): 9:05pm On May 30, 2021
michaelpop50:


My dad spoke all the languages in Nigeria when he was alive.
It's one thing to speak fluently and hold fluent conversations, it's another thing to understand just a few words. Moreover do you know how many languages there are in Nigeria? Lol stop exagerrating.

8 Likes 1 Share

Re: What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? by SefunmiHookups: 9:05pm On May 30, 2021
Nothing
Re: What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? by NewDelhi(m): 9:07pm On May 30, 2021
poshestmina:


My dad speaks 8 Languages.
I speak 5 kiss kiss kiss, hoping to learn more especially french and German. Amen.
It's not just about speaking a few words, can you hold conversations fluently? That's what we mean.

1 Like

Re: What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? by hosemujica: 9:08pm On May 30, 2021
AdeOri99:

Ok sir, thank you very much
you welcome bro.

1 Like

Re: What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? by Nobody: 9:09pm On May 30, 2021
NewDelhi:

It's one thing to speak fluently and hold fluent conversations, it's another thing to understand just a few words. Moreover do you know how many languages there are in Nigeria? Lol stop exagerrating.

Take am

Re: What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? by donem: 9:10pm On May 30, 2021
poshestmina:


No...no international one yet.
I'm hoping to learn them soon.
U speak Hausa?
Re: What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? by Clicked: 9:25pm On May 30, 2021
NewDelhi:

How many times will I tell you people, get your own apartment and stop squatting with people even if he's a family member. For the first few weeks/months, they'll be kind and nice but It's only a matter of time before they start getting tired of you and thinking of ways to send you parking.

So true, they will be nice for some weeks or months, then after that little things will become big issues.

The ones I was staying with because of work came right out to ask me when I was moving. Me too, I was tired of them and I had already found an apartment. I quickly told them that I was moving out that week.

This squatting thing can bring disrespect.

6 Likes

Re: What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? by Pofgrace(m): 9:25pm On May 30, 2021
AdeOri99:

For real?
I shall be very grateful.

6031397078
Keystone bank
sorry it's coming late I just get back to nairaland manage the token bro I be hustler too

7 Likes

Re: What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? by alfajohn: 9:40pm On May 30, 2021
AdeOri99:

For real?
I shall be very grateful.

6031397078
Keystone bank
.
Sent 10k just use hold body it is well. Nairaland one happy family irrespective of the abuses.

24 Likes 1 Share

Re: What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? by Nobody: 9:41pm On May 30, 2021
Pofgrace:
sorry it's coming late I just get back to nairaland manage the token bro I be hustler too
Thank you very much sir.
Re: What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? by Nobody: 9:42pm On May 30, 2021
alfajohn:
.
Sent 10k just use hold body it is well. Nairaland one happy family irrespective of the abuses.
Thank you very much sir, just seen it.

5 Likes

Re: What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? by Rita33(f): 9:49pm On May 30, 2021
alfajohn:
.
Sent 10k just use hold body it is well. Nairaland one happy family irrespective of the abuses.



Boss do me small thing.... We in same shoes cry cry cry
Re: What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? by Kingzjayzee: 10:05pm On May 30, 2021
Ishilove:

Very legit. 100%
no problem na. Since it's coming from the one and only ishilove. I'll give it a try. Thanks anyways.
Re: What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? by simplesearch: 10:07pm On May 30, 2021
Ugandatales:


Wow! So, your mom cried when your stepmom died. What a great family. Dad must be a great man.


Polygamy is not God's will, those thinking they can make anything good out of what has rejected like the offering of cain are only deceiving themselves. If you're a second wife and reading this no matter your investment in that relationship, for your eternity sake divorce the man and get on with the Lord and he'll definitely make a way for you, but if you refuse and stick out your neck you are only wasting your precious life, God only see you as a parasite and a thief, and no thief will inherit the kingdom of God.
Polygamy only thrive for a while, it always create and engineer more problem later in life for those involved than it can solve. Some problem may even surface after the man is gone, some might even be unpremeditated or unthought of.

3 Likes 2 Shares

Re: What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? by hakeemhakeem(m): 10:13pm On May 30, 2021
respectfully:
Hahahaha mek I laugh first. When I was 10years old, I went to visit my elder brother in his one room apartment just to spend two days because that time he was a fresh graduate. In the night he called his girlfriend to come they were all in bed while I was sleeping on the mat, they pretended as if they didn't want to to anything. Me as a bad boy , On my mind I was like today na today I must see how una go take do am. Around past eleven, I started soft snoring, both of them whispered in a low tone, "he is sleeping " "he has slept off". After few minutes, my brother took style and called me twice, I didn't respond, I was snoring, he told his girlfriend that I slept off. They started their football game, I heard a voice like pussy cat crying , I was laughing in my mind, after a while, she stopped crying like pussy cat. I later heard okay put it by yourself �����
The last sentence ring Louder
Re: What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? by aviationguy: 10:17pm On May 30, 2021
A quality service assured....08032387510

Re: What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? by hakeemhakeem(m): 10:34pm On May 30, 2021
AdeOri99:

No b only US.
as i am presently, havn't tasted no food since morning, that is to show you how i am suffering presently.

but i am still in my early 20s, full of hope and working towards achieving my dream.

Some people are just bitter and intollerant, i can't begin to explain how much i suffered in the hand of this woman.
She literally killed me.

Hold on to the lord a journey of a thousands mile start with taken a step.
Re: What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? by hakeemhakeem(m): 10:36pm On May 30, 2021
UDUJ:


cheesy grin cheesy These are the types of stories I love reading. Nice thread cool
Correct! no abuses
Re: What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? by samonak(m): 10:38pm On May 30, 2021
My elder brother telling my immediate senior brother that " no be person like me suppose go NMS that I was too soft and lazy. ( men it really crushed my spirit, cos my childhood dream then, was to attend military school in Zaria)
Re: What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? by hakeemhakeem(m): 10:46pm On May 30, 2021
Dwayne22:
I heard my younger brother promising his girlfriend that he won't mind killing his whole family because of her.. Na so I use cutlass pursue the two of them comot for our house

You should know his was just keying the girl to to his bidding

1 Like

Re: What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? by freemandela4(m): 10:48pm On May 30, 2021
simplesearch:



Polygamy is not God's will, those thinking they can make anything good out of what has rejected like the offering of cain are only deceiving themselves. If you're a second wife and reading this no matter your investment in that relationship, for your eternity sake divorce the man and get on with the Lord and he'll definitely make a way for you, but if you refuse and stick out your neck you are only wasting your precious life, God only see you as a parasite and a thief, and no thief will inherit the kingdom of God.
Polygamy only thrive for a while, it always create and engineer more problem later in life for those involved than it can solve. Some problem may even surface after the man is gone, some might even be unpremeditated or unthought of.
It depends on your religion and where you came from.....

1 Like

Re: What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? by Lighthammer(m): 11:15pm On May 30, 2021
had to stay with my dad friend sometimes ago when i travelled to imo state,his children were behaving somehow and they started abusing me in spanish and they dnt knw i understant it and german and when saying those words they will be smiling,i just maintain a poker face,the day i was to leave,i decided to instill fear in them,the older female was wishing me a safe journey and i told her callate perra(shut up bi t c h)
her reaction was priceless

16 Likes 2 Shares

Re: What's The Worst Thing You've Overheard While Pretending To Be Asleep? by EzeAnambra: 11:27pm On May 30, 2021
AgentGoat:



wetin you con do next?
I didn't let them know I understood what dey were discussing.

(1) (2) (3) ... (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) (Reply)

When Your Ex Is Your Wedding Planner (Pictured) / Photo: When He Says He Lives In A Storey Building / Lagoon Bus! Strictly For Ibo Passenger (photo)

(Go Up)

Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket

Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 58
Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland.