Hmmm .. People still dey love? My mindset after my last heart pieces is ,any girl who calls me love or baby wants something from me.She has plans. So,I start calculating ,so that I don't fall for it.. Love when do me shege in the past.. I no do again o.. The worst thing that can ever happen to a man is to fall in love with a girl o.. The day you fall in love,a new mumu is born..

Liliantalks:
Please I need advice on this, help me

Be more selective of the person you are loving

Senoiret:
Hi Lilian for the sake of you bearing the name of the first girl I fell in love and I've always loved until now makes me feel weird... You see controlling your emotions is as difficult as rejecting the urge to eat whenever you see food, our neuron has been wired to secure emotional attachment in degree of ways..


I was the kind of guy that fell in love with almost any girl I see or get closer to, I couldn't handle a friendship without getting emotional after a while, it got to a point I began asking my female colleague In school to give me some space as I was always close to many of them....

Today I will fall in love with amaka, tomorrow blessing, nextweek bunmi, not until I got cautious of myself, took a deep connection to my ideology and found out I was attatched to people based on looks and sensory perception, also your heart could be deceptive into tricking you you love someone, it could be based on looks, gesture from that person or a series of event placing you into an emotional discord, so in trying to find that acceptance, you get over emotional to people you aren't supposed to...

Also if you look from a science perspective, Your dopamine level is actually high and the neurons carrying receptors for emotions may be oversaturated and releasing a high volume of feeling whenever you get emotional, it's like a safe bunker for you, it's what gives you joy...


But regardless you are the only one that can save yourself from getting attached if not you will cry sotey, your tears will create a crease on your cheek....
Read more from the link
https://sitn.hms.harvard.edu/flash/2017/love-actually-science-behind-lust-attraction-companionship/

I love this your write up but how one save herself from getting emotionally attached to someone since it's natural.

Lollittaa:

and when she puts herself and her needs first, she's then a "selfish b***ch"

K

fuckboys:
Always have sex with different girls, oloshos and esteemos alike, I bet you you'll hardly fall in love, you'll take all girls as a joke.

Works for me tho, fuk em and unto the next.

This here, is a very bad advice especially for married men but, it works like magic

Victerica:



Are you very logical?

yes. why?

zexy2030:

Guy, calm down, you treat emotional issues with selflessness. She wouldn't need this, if she had accepted herself. But she doesn't want to be trapped by love nest anymore and after be jilted.

Emotional maturity is giving without expecting a return. Just give what you can loose. That's how to go about emotional imbalance and feelings of not being loved. Love boomerangs if u give it to those the society never cares if they exist.

Though don't start what you cannot finish.

She needs to love herself first before trying all these things you mentioned. You can't give what you don't have. No matter how good or kind she is to others....their love won't drive her demons away in her lonely moments.

first of all you need a heavy heartbreak that will put your heart assunder



When this happens there'll be leackages in every part of your heart that'll make it unproof to hold any strong emotion again


When this happen you'll be free

You can still love any way

But it won't cost you a heartbeat

I mean you'll easily let go whenever however

You'll be neutral and uncaged by philial entanglements

Learn to write at leat a programming language and assign yourself a complex task

Haipre:
Let me just say this but on a normal note, I won't suggest this with those that are emotionally unstable...

If I want to avoid having emotional attachment or loving someone, I will definitely look for one flaw the person has... Everyone has one flaw or the other... I will just expand it in my mind that can make me have a distaste for that person.. from there, I have lost all emotional touches to the person... Anytime I see the person, I will just remember that flaw and how it has been expanded in my mind.. nothing can make me go back to loving that person...

#PS: like I said.. just the way I do mine, not advisable for everyone

This is the method I use also.
It's very helpful.

So yesterday, I was with Hadiza who I guess is love struck or what I couldn't place my hands on professing how she loved me and want us to be together. Well, I acted out the roles, told her what her itching ears have been clamoring for but deep inside I know there is nothing coming out of this relationship.

After I was done with Hadiza, went to see Anna though she was a bit sick had to help her with the medications and all that and Madam was feeling funky too, that I'm romantic and all that but deep inside she don clear me say she no fii marry my kind so we just dey zuzu ourselves.

OP, tori plenty but you see ehnnnn, when abobi been dey secondary school dey pen poetry for Bisoye and maybe Tina thinking that he would end with Bisoye but plan change and LDR no follow na him I comot hand for emotions and commitments matter, as I dey so every of my relationships na based on wetin I fii see not on emotions and that had helped me a lot.
I will be lying if I don't give the credits to Ubunja and all the pillers on this forum, you guys are the best.

Chase money.. when you hit your fire target, your utmost priority will be to protect it away from these luciferin hedonistic charlatans called women.

Any man that refuses to guard themselves in this new age of open glorification of thotery and non committal co dependencies will only have themselves to blame.

To do that always see things the way they are: Women are to be feared while men are to be respected only if they don't act like women. If you're overwhelmed by emotion use it as an act of meditation don't be a fool and go past your boundaries

Liliantalks:
Please I need advice on this, help me

Come to me let me teach you how....the expo ain't on NL

Commit suicide.

It is impossible to stop loving

I guess this slove it all....thanks egbon

fuckboys:
Always have sex with different girls, oloshos and esteemos alike, I bet you you'll hardly fall in love, you'll take all girls as a joke.

Works for me tho, fuk em and unto the next.

Franzinni:
I guess he is seeing the sidekick. That is why you are emotionally distressed

But I most likely am wrong however my advice is start to love yourself and you will not need it from any external medium ... but as long as you seek love from external means you have to 've prepared for thethem baggage that comes with it

Wisdom here!

I recommend this as it is what one need to stop emotionally hurt. Nothing more than loving oneself.
Everything begins and end with you..

Sometimes Distance is no barrier.. in the realm... When emotional attachment is involved.

Pray not to have for the wrong person or someone who is not meant to be!!!

Liliantalks:
it’s really not that easy , especially when sex get involved

you already have the solution, don't allow sex then. That's the easiest way for ladies to emotionally connect to guys

this is a 100 million dollar topic. let me have a seat pls

IJEYdiamond:
Sometimes Distance is no barrier.. in the realm... When emotional attachment is involved.

Pray not to have for the wrong person or someone who is not meant to be!!!

how do you know the right person when it's all pretence from the start

Liliantalks:
Please I need advice on this, help me

Don't learn to stop loving and having emotional attachments. Instead, learn to accept and cope with them.

If you have a problem with codependency (addiction to someone or infatuation), learn how to love yourself truly and deeply

When you truly and deeply love yourself, being emotionally attached to others won't affect you at all. It will be easier to let go. It will be easy to get back up if you get hurt

zexy2030:

Just one advice for you: Distract yourself with positive impacts on the less privileged.

Forget yourself and develop the less privileged than you. Give a selfless service to those who can't pay you back nor can they give back or you expect anything in return.

Always show that you expect nothing in return.

In doing this, you will understand emotions and attract the right persons.

Women think wearing sexy dresses is what makes them attractive.

It is selfless service to those who can't pay you back that is the sexiest.

Do it passionately but exclude romance from your thoughts entirely.

Drop food for hungry widows.

Pickup an orphan and train in school, not a guy o. But a kid. Definitely let it be a female child.

Adopt a family to bless.

Gifts to gifted children who feels unloved, just like you feel.

The emotion that flows back is much more than what you get from a guy.

This is very very very bad advice!

Being too selfless or too selfish is toxic. Being either extremes would make you live a very miserable life

The key is to find a healthy balance in between

luminouz:
Redpill mudafucker.

That's the single greatest advice I will give any man out there. For a woman, put YOU first as a priority. No one will ever love you more than you love yourself,so love yourself. If you don't love yourself enough, you fall prey to sweet mouths. The key is to LOVE AND BE HAPPY WITH YOURSELF.


Know these and know peace

You're halfway there

Genuine love requires vulnerability. Being vulnerable comes with the risk of getting hurt

The key is to love yourself enough. To be a complete whole and happy individual. That way, heartbreaks won't hurt much

And being too selfish is toxic. Being too selfless is also toxic. The key is the find a healthy balance

Protecting yourself from heartbreak protects you from love. If you do everything you can to avoid heartbreak, you will never experience love

Teerach:
By loving yourself first. Putting yourself first and be selfish with yourself.
If you love yourself highly, you won't give space for hurt cos you'll be too busy loving yourself to care.
Try by affirming "I love you" everytime you catch yourself free. Do it as much as you can. Feel the feeling. Tell yourself all the good things you want to hear from another.

You're halfway there

Genuine love requires vulnerability. Being vulnerable comes with the risk of getting hurt

The key is to love yourself enough. To be a complete whole and happy individual. That way, heartbreaks won't hurt much

And being too selfish is toxic. Being too selfless is also toxic. The key is the find a healthy balance

Protecting yourself from heartbreak protects you from love. If you do everything you can to avoid heartbreak, you will never experience love

ruffkenny:
1)By knowing that anyone that say they love u might hurt u,

2)By knowing that the best way to love anyone is to realise that u might loose them at anytime

3)By knowing that there is a thin line between love and hate

4)By going after those who have feelings for u and not just the ones who u feel sth for.

5)By not allowing anyone be the reason why u will be happy but finding happiness even within urself and knowing things that make u happy and doing them by yourself..

6)By not letting feelings be the reason u are with someone but
Compartibility, chemistry, connection,moral values,shared ideas,disciplines, friendship...

7)By learning not to miss anyone and be busy doing sth worthwhile,maybe Ur job,Ur dreams,Ur goals and vision..

These might help u be unattached to anyone emotionally...

Quote: BE NICE TO EVERYONE,
BE KIND TO ALL PEOPLE
BUT BE ATTACHED TO
NONE,
& ALSO TRUST NO ONE

You're halfway there

Genuine love requires vulnerability. Being vulnerable comes with the risk of getting hurt

The key is to love yourself enough. To be a complete whole and happy individual. That way, heartbreaks won't hurt much

And being too selfish is toxic. Being too selfless is also toxic. The key is the find a healthy balance

Protecting yourself from heartbreak protects you from love. If you do everything you can to avoid heartbreak, you will never experience love

One principle you must imbibe is to always love yourself even if there is no reason for that, purge and move away from negative people that will not add any value to your life. Above all, positive socialization will boost your inner belief.

Lol... It's not impossible man. Just zero your mind. Been that way for a minute. I just hope I can restore emotions when I want it back.

Liliantalks:
Please I need advice on this, help me

This is coming from a heart that loved without material reason, but just for the soul and being of the other person... Sorry that soul didn't love you back. Its Life and the lessons you have to learn. You'll be stronger, you'll be better.. Use this as a form of internship for your heart. May God grant you your Best. Amen

bepositive11:


You're halfway there

Genuine love requires vulnerability. Being vulnerable comes with the risk of getting hurt

The key is to love yourself enough. To be a complete whole and happy individual. That way, heartbreaks won't hurt much

And being too selfish is toxic. Being too selfless is also toxic. The key is the find a healthy balance

Protecting yourself from heartbreak protects you from love. If you do everything you can to avoid heartbreak, you will never experience love

well said!
Courage is knowing it might hurt,and doing it anyway. Stupidity is the same.
And that's why life's hard.