Rosement:
I'm just scared because anybody can change. My friend is enduring her marriage, she married my grand aunt son, she was a virgin before her marriage and she has a very good character. My mother was the one that recommended her when my cousin said he needed a wife, he is based in US, they have been married for more than five years now but she is still in Nigeria. The embassy denied her visa two times, I feel something is fishing, it seems he is the one doing things wrongly. If it is just courtship, I would have personally broken it but it is marriage, there is nothing I can do about it, she has to keep enduring.

All those long distance marriages are a pain in the arse!

Jayrockk:
I feel this way sometimes, but I believe mine is because of lack of money

I can relate bro. Nowadays girls no send u ooo, if u no get money. But u can still find girls(financially independent girls) who are willing to stick to u irrespective of ur financial state. Bro, It is well.

Rosement:
You are kind of confused, you are probably commenting on the wrong post, I am not blaming any gender or saying I am perfect. I only stated my fears.

No, I'm not confused..... you are the one confused about marriage and that's bringing your fears.From your response, the writing is clear.You are afraid of your future partner and what he will bring to the table but you are refusing to accept that you yourself could be the future problem or person to fall apart.....

Trust... lol... you talk about trust? Can you yourself be trusted?

Please aunty read the post first so you can understand, I started with if you have a recovery story, please share. We are talking about gamophobia, this is not a gender war. Gamophobia is the fear of getting married or the fear of commitment.

chii8:



No, I'm not confused..... you are the one confused about marriage and that's bringing your fears.From your response, the writing is clear.You are afraid of your future partner and what he will bring to the table but you are refusing to accept that you yourself could be the future problem or person to talk apart.....

Rosement:
Please aunty read the post first so you can understand, I started with if you have a recovery story, please share. We are talking about gamophobia, this is not a gender war. Gamophobia is the fear of getting married or the fear of commitment.

Aunty, you don't get it,do you? you are afraid your partner would not be committed in a relationship but are you yourself going to be committed in that same relationship.We tend to blame everyone and everything but ourselves....If we,as humans works on our weakness.... the world would be a better place.

Madam, phobia is an extreme fear of something, anybody can be afraid of anything, you can be good at something and still be afraid of it.

chii8:



Aunty, you don't get it,do you? you are afraid your partner would be committed in a relationship but are you yourself going to committed in that same relationship.We tend to blame everyone and everything but ourselves....If we as humans works on our weakness.... the world would be a better place.

Rosement:
Madam, phobia is an extreme fear of something, anybody can be afraid of anything, you can be good at something and still be afraid of it.

Madam,what is triggering your fear?Quite funny how you can define key words but have refused to agree that you are the reason for your fear(s).....

Mine sis, this is not a blaming game but you are still very confused, listen to yourself you are asking me to leave my own fears and focus on my guy's strength. When you have a phobia, it means you are scared of something, that thing doesn't have to be scary for you to be scarce of it, fear can be caused by anything, even trauma can trigger fear. Other people that have been commenting understand what I am saying, there is no point explaining to you, you won't understand, if you want to enlighten yourself read more on phobias.

chii8:



Madam,what is triggering your fear?Quite funny how you can define key words but have refused to agree that you are the reason for your fear(s).....

dawnomike:
@Pweetiedude has said it all

Hello Dawnomike. Long time

McStoic:


Hello Dawnomike. Long time

I'm fine and you?

dawnomike:
I'm fine and you?

Good bro. Nice to see your moniker. Been a while. You are one of the few guys on Nairaland whose tm monikers always cause a certain sense of good feeling and memories. Keep on keeping on bro.. God bless

Rosement:
She is a Christian sister, she has taking the marriage vows there is no turning back. According to him, he is still interested in her, he speaks to her over the phone and sends money to her monthly.

If he sends money,that means she is enjoying...not enduring,women loves money.

Rosement:
If you have a recovery story, please share.
Seven years ago, I met a responsible guy that wanted to marry me, I convinced myself that I was too young. While responsible guys kept showing up I thought I was not ready.
When I started meeting difficult ones, I became so troubled and I started praying so hard for a responsible guy to show up, he finally shows up but now I am beginning to feel so anxious.
My parent opened up their concern about my relationship when I was marking my 26th birthday this month, I couldn't tell them that I am in a relationship, I just told them that I am still searching because I feel they might speed things up.

When you are 30 ....you ll definitely come to terms with any form of commitment

Rosement:
Mine sis, this is not a blaming game but you are still very confused, listen to yourself you are asking me to leave my own fears and focus on my guy's strength. When you have a phobia, it means you are scared of something, that thing doesn't have to be scary for you to be scarce of it, fear can be caused by anything, even trauma can trigger fear. Other people that have been commenting understand what I am saying, there is no point explaining to you, you won't understand, if you want to enlighten yourself read more on phobias.

My dear, I'm not asking you to do anything, I'm not also blaming you for anything but if you are afraid of commitment in a marriage relationship,then look within yourself......

femi4:
When you are 30 ....you ll definitely come to terms with any form of commitment

Exactly......they don't want to hear the truth....it will all end in Shiloh Las Las....

If a man is caught having an extramarital affair does that mean all men are unfaithful and if a woman marries a man because of money does that mean all women are gold diggers. We did not come from the sky, we have all got family members, if you believe you have good males and females in your family, don't generalise things.
There are good men and good women and there are also bad men and bad women. Every individual be it a male or female have their own individual personality. Another man's food is another's man poison. Let's try to intervene in situations without being bias If I was bias I would be supporting my cousin and not my friend because he is my blood.

Youngpo413:
If he sends money,that means she is enjoying...not enduring,women loves money.

Thanks for understanding, some people think gamophobia is a crime or sin.

Pweetiedude:
Once you acknowledge the fear and realize that it’s within your power to change, you’ve taken the first step.

If you’re in a relationship, be totally honest with that person to avoid leading them on. Let them know that this is about you and your history, and you’re learning how to deal with it.

Explore the reasons behind your fear. Are past events sabotaging your present happiness?

Think about what you want and need in a relationship. You might come to realize that long-term commitment isn’t your cup of tea after all. Or you might discover that despite the fear, that’s exactly what you want.

That realization may be all you need to start overcoming your fear.

Your own truth is gamophobia is an offensive. Anyway, the good news is my life is in the hands of God and not in your hands. God will determine my fate not you. Mama, thanks for your concern.

chii8:




Exactly......they don't want to hear the truth....it will all end in Shiloh Las Las....

Rosement:
Please aunty read the post first so you can understand, I started with if you have a recovery story, please share. We are talking about gamophobia, this is not a gender war. Gamophobia is the fear of getting married or the fear of commitment.

Maybe you're a Sagittarius or a Gemini.

Cc: Powefly

Rosement:
Your own truth is gamophobia is an offensive. Anyway, the good news is my life is in the hands of God and not in your hands. God will determine my fate not you. Mama, thanks for your concern.

Sure, your life is in the hands of God........

You're welcome ma'am!!!

McStoic:


Good bro. Nice to see your moniker. Been a while. You are one of the few guys on Nairaland whose tm monikers always cause a certain sense of good feeling and memories. Keep on keeping on bro.. God bless

Thanks so much my brother... I really appreciate your compliments

chii8:
The earlier you come to agree that you yourself is not perfect,the better.Who told you that the negative changes you are afraid of won't be coming from you.In marriage, you work on your selves to fit in.Women changes faster than men.

Welcome back Chi. How was your long break?

Bro, thanks for the compliment but I really don't deserve to be complimented because I am one of the imperfect human beings on earth.

The truth is, I cannot be mute when people are ignorant about something, if I don't enlighten other people, it means I am selfish because I am also learning from other's comment.
When we make a comment, somebody is learning one or two things from it, that is why we have to think properly before we comment.

Some people frown at corrections, when you try to correct them they pick up a fight with you but the truth is nobody is above corrections. Anybody can be corrected.

Whenever, somebody corrects me on nairaland, I don't reject the correction as long as I know the person is giving the right correction. I have also learnt things from my argument on this forum. I am the kind person that accept corrections but I don't accept words of ignorance.

Whenever, I am arguing with somebody and the person enlightens me and proves to me that I am wrong, I am always very happy, I use to stop the argument and like the person's comment because I love and respect people that are knowledgeable.

Knowledgeable people, do not only pass on knowledge, they also learn from others because they understand that they are not always right.

Karlifate:


Maybe you're a Sagittarius or a Gemini.

Cc: Powefly

Rosement:
It is the marriage vows that bound them together not the money, I wish he could divorce her himself so that the sin can be on him.

She is her own problem. Tell her, he should send his sperm refrigerated to her for insemination, that she can no longer bear it. Or involve elders in both family. Otherwise, she may be surprised she is having selfish relations. Who just want the money and not her happiness.

Her energy for living is too cold, even God hates, lack of initiatives, animals were created for Adam, God never told him to name them, but he did and it became a rule till date. Yes, patience is key. But wisdom is the principal. The wisdom is this: she fears God. She can't fornicate, commit adultery. Tell her to the use essence of technology to get herself pregnant, 5yrs is too much for someone who is no longer a virgin, but she is burning with affection over a faraway husband, she should take things forcefully. find a way for insemination. Then if he doubts he can do DNA after birth at least the baby would keep her waiting company.

Rosement:
Bro, thanks for the compliment but I really don't deserve to be complimented because I am one of the imperfect human beings on earth.

The truth is, I cannot be mute when people are ignorant about something, if I don't enlighten other people, it means I am selfish because I am also learning from other's comment.
When we make a comment, somebody is learning one or two things from it, that is why we have to think properly before we comment.

Some people frown at corrections, when you try to correct them they pick up a fight with you but the truth is nobody is above corrections. Anybody can be corrected.

Whenever, somebody corrects me on nairaland, I don't reject the correction as long as I know the person is giving the right correction. I have also learnt things from my argument on this forum. I am the kind person that accept corrections but I don't accept words of ignorance.

Whenever, I am arguing with somebody and the person enlightens me and proves to me that I am wrong, I am always very happy, I use to stop the argument and like the person's comment because I love and respect people that are knowledgeable.

Knowledgeable people, do not only pass on knowledge, they also learn from others because they understand that they are not always right.

Rose everyday I read your comment I've grown to respect you more and more.

Rose please send me a DM on WhatsApp 08100553547

MisterKennedy:


Rose everyday I read your comment I've grown to respect you more and more.

Rose please send me a DM on WhatsApp 08100553547

Thanks for the compliment

Rosement:

Thanks for the compliment

You're welcome Rose

Please WhatsApp me. Please Rose

Rosement:

Thanks for the compliment

You're welcome dear.

Merry Christmas to you in advance.

Rose please send me a message on Whatsapp 08100553547

Rosement:
If you have a recovery story, please share.
Seven years ago, I met a responsible guy that wanted to marry me, I convinced myself that I was too young. While responsible guys kept showing up I thought I was not ready.
When I started meeting difficult ones, I became so troubled and I started praying so hard for a responsible guy to show up, he finally shows up but now I am beginning to feel so anxious.
My parent opened up their concern about my relationship when I was marking my 26th birthday this month, I couldn't tell them that I am in a relationship, I just told them that I am still searching because I feel they might speed things up.

I didnt know you were in a relationship already

Awkabigboy:

I didnt know you were in a relationship already

It's alright.

Merry Christmas to you all.

To those that I have offended, I am very sorry.
I ❤ you all and Jesus ❤❤❤❤❤❤s you more.

Thank you Jesus

The owner of my soul

Alpha Omega

You are worthy to be praised

In all generation

There is No One like You

Alpha Omega

You are worthy to be praised