Honestly, I don't understand this. Is this an act of hypocriacy or what truth are they really hiding from us?
They claimed marriage is not important, not for everyone, that you can stay single and be having children outside wedlock, so long as you can take care of them. Yet, they go about talking you down as soon as you're of age and have no wife/husband.

A girlfriend of mine in her late thirties just declared she's getting married and everyone is sharing her up, sending her congratulatory messages as if she has not been existing.

Does marriage really worth that hyping or what's so special about it that civilization is hiding from us?

It's worth it if you find the right person and you have also worked on yourself to be the right person, too.

1. You get a companion...sha e get some wey na thugs.

2. Free Sex till you tire

3.

Peace
Companion
Access to good food
Healthy environment
Unconditional love
Public display of love

wordapostle:
Peace
Companion
Access to good food
Healthy environment
Unconditional love
Public display of love

Haba na!!!
You can get all this things even without getting married ...

And besides sef, a lot of married couples lack one or more of what you listed on their homes...

How many couples do you see kissing in public and how frequent ((public display of love))??

Loxleyy:
1. You get a companion...sha e get some wey na thugs.

2. Free Sex till you tire

3.

Brotherly...
This thing wey you right so no apply to all marriages o ...

wordapostle:
Peace
Companion
Access to good food
Healthy environment
Unconditional love
Public display of love

In fact all these things you listed are lacking in most marriages I know.

Ive heard some complain that since they got married and started having children, theyve never had a good sleep. So where's the peace?

Some are married but the company level they offer each other is zero.

Not all married couples enjoy good food always or even have the luxury or skills to provide that for their spouses. I know of a man that his wife will be cooking at home and he'll carry plate to mama Togo to buy food. The woman has cried, fought and complained, still the man no send. Still does it till today.

Anybody can live in a healthy environment both singles. I wonder why anyone would wait until they are married before living in a healthy environment though.

As for public display of love. If that is the reason why anyone wants to get married, then that's childish and the person doesn't understand the essence of marriage because when the nitti-gritti of marriage starts hitting them left right and center, they won't even remember to move as a couple any longer.

So??...

To me, nothing really special about marriage because I've moved closely with married people and all i see is stress, stress and more stress!

Imagine the daily routine of a woman. Especially those who are not working.

Wake up early ( when youre not ready)
Prep the children for school.
Prepare their food breakfast.
If hubby is nice, he'll help drop them off otherwise, you do the school runs.

You get home and start putting the house in order. And attend to other chores staring you in the face. Time is ticking

Get ready to prepare lunch.
Then before you know it, it's time to go pick the kids.
Come back, freshen them up.
Serve them
Attend to their home work.

The you get set for dinner so hubby can have something to eat when he gets home. Before you know it, the day is gone and you're fagged out. Same thing continues tomorrow and on and on until....

Imagine if you're a working Mom and now have to combine all these with work...

Now tell me what will make a single viewing all these want to get married?

Truth be told, that's another thing I calculate and i relax and continue enjoying my single life.

Many married women are not happy. They are silently crying!!!
Forget all that fake smile they wear when they come out. They are not happy

Even the men are not 100% fulfilled. Responsibility wan break their neck.

Let's tell ourselves the truth. Even if you're rich, it's still not that easy.

I've seen a rich couple who both drove madly to school at the same time to pick their ward and were reigning heavy curses at each other at the gate because they both argued earlier on who's going to pick the son. So it's like non of them wanted to come and it was already evening and the boy was still in school.

I guess they called the house and the nanny who was babysitting their twin babies then, told them the boy was not home.

Omor.. see the speed they drove into the school compound with. Wify packed one side, hubby parked the other way and they both jumped out of their cars rushing Into the school and abusing each other.

Wife : " You shouldn't have come" useless man" As she stormed into the classroom

Man: ori e ko pe. why did you come? You should have remained at work"

Hmmm... So much hype about marriage. Abegi!

Mercychen:
To me, nothing really special about marriage because I've moved closely with married people and all i see is stress, stress and more stress!

Imagine the daily routine of a woman. Especially those who are not working.

Wake up early ( when youre not ready)
Prep the children for school.
Prepare their food breakfast.
If hubby is nice, he'll help drop them off otherwise, you do the school runs.

You get home and start putting the house in order. And attend to other chores staring you in the face. Time is ticking

Get ready to prepare lunch.
Then before you know it, it's time to go pick the kids.
Come back, freshen them up.
Serve them
Attend to their home work.

The you get set for dinner so hubby can have something to eat when he gets home. Before you know it, the day is gone and you're fagged out. Same thing continues tomorrow and on and on until....

Imagine if you're a working Mom and now have to combine all these with work...

Now tell me what will make a single viewing all these want to get married?

Truth be told, that's another thing I calculate and i relax and continue enjoying my single life.

Many married women are not happy. They are silently crying!!!
Forget all that fake smile they wear when they come out. They are not happy

Even the men are not 100% fulfilled. Responsibility wan break their neck.

Let's tell ourselves the truth. Even if you're rich, it's still not that easy.

I've seen a rich couple who both drove madly to school at the same time to pick their ward and were reigning heavy curses at each other at the gate because they both argued earlier on who's going to pick the son. So it's like non of them wanted to come and it was already evening and the boy was still in school.

I guess they called the house and the nanny who was babysitting their twin babies then, told them the boy was not home.

Omor.. see the speed they drove into the school compound with. Wify packed one side, hubby parked the other way and they both jumped out of their cars rushing Into the school and abusing each other.

Wife : " You shouldn't have come" useless man" As she stormed into the classroom

Man: ori e ko pe. why did you come? You should have remained at work"

Hmmm... So much hype about marriage. Abegi!

Dwelling too much on negatives...

It almost seems like you're trying really hard to validate yourself for being single.

crackhaus:

Dwelling too much on negatives...

It almost seems like you're trying really hard to validate yourself for being single.

Nothing like dwelling on the negative here. Its a normal phenomenon and thats only one aspect I just cited there, which most married people can attest to.

I like to say things the way they are. It's not negativity but reality., Onyen " negative".

As for my being single, it's a choice. And I won't join you and your lots to go into marriage just because others are going into it or without first calculating the cost,; only to get there and start wishing I never did.

You that is married, how far?
Are you any happier?
Uchu!



.

Mercychen:


Nothing like dwelling on the negative here. Its a normal phenomenon and thats only one aspect I just cited there, which most married people can attest to.

I like to say things the way they are. It's not negativity but reality., Onyen " negative".

As for my being single, it's a choice. And I won't join you and your lots to go into marriage just because others are going into it or without first calculating the cost,; only to get there and start wishing I never did.

You that is married, how far?
Are you any happier?
Uchu!



.

Dainy1:
Honestly, I don't understand this. Is this an act of hypocriacy or what truth are they really hiding from us?
They claimed marriage is not important, not for everyone, that you can stay single and be having children outside wedlock, so long as you can take care of them. Yet, they go about talking you down as soon as you're of age and have no wife/husband.

A girlfriend of mine in her late thirties just declared she's getting married and everyone is sharing her up, sending her congratulatory messages as if she has not been existing.

Does marriage really worth that hyping or what's so special about it that civilization is hiding from us?

Who is they? The people who say marriage is not important are probably not the same people who talk down on unmarried people so I see no hypocrisy here.

Whether she is getting married in her 30s or 20s people will congratulate her because under normal circumstances an upcoming wedding is a happy occasion. It means that someone has found love which is wonderful, isn't it?

Personally, I believe that Nigerians 'hype' marriage too much but I agree that being married to the right person can be a beautiful experience.

Mercychen:
To me, nothing really special about marriage because I've moved closely with married people and all i see is stress, stress and more stress!

Imagine the daily routine of a woman. Especially those who are not working.

Wake up early ( when youre not ready)
Prep the children for school.
Prepare their food breakfast.
If hubby is nice, he'll help drop them off otherwise, you do the school runs.

You get home and start putting the house in order. And attend to other chores staring you in the face. Time is ticking

Get ready to prepare lunch.
Then before you know it, it's time to go pick the kids.
Come back, freshen them up.
Serve them
Attend to their home work.

The you get set for dinner so hubby can have something to eat when he gets home. Before you know it, the day is gone and you're fagged out. Same thing continues tomorrow and on and on until....

Imagine if you're a working Mom and now have to combine all these with work...

Now tell me what will make a single viewing all these want to get married?

Truth be told, that's another thing I calculate and i relax and continue enjoying my single life.

Many married women are not happy. They are silently crying!!!
Forget all that fake smile they wear when they come out. They are not happy

Even the men are not 100% fulfilled. Responsibility wan break their neck.

Let's tell ourselves the truth. Even if you're rich, it's still not that easy.

I've seen a rich couple who both drove madly to school at the same time to pick their ward and were reigning heavy curses at each other at the gate because they both argued earlier on who's going to pick the son. So it's like non of them wanted to come and it was already evening and the boy was still in school.

I guess they called the house and the nanny who was babysitting their twin babies then, told them the boy was not home.

Omor.. see the speed they drove into the school compound with. Wify packed one side, hubby parked the other way and they both jumped out of their cars rushing Into the school and abusing each other.

Wife : " You shouldn't have come" useless man" As she stormed into the classroom

Man: ori e ko pe. why did you come? You should have remained at work"

Hmmm... So much hype about marriage. Abegi!

You have described the stress that comes with having very young children and not with marriage as such.

But kids grow! In my brother's house the three kids who are all in primary school prepare their breakfast alone. Their parents teach them how to take care of themselves and there is no longer 'I want this, I don't like this'. My brother enjoys his coffee.

And when you ask him what makes him happy, he will tell you that it is his family. They are currently considering having a fourth child.

If it was that bad, they would not. They aren't mad.

Different strokes ...

Hathor5:


Who is they? The people who say marriage is not important are probably not the same people who talk down on unmarried people so I see no hypocrisy here.

Whether she is getting married in her 30s or 20s people will congratulate her because under normal circumstances an upcoming wedding is a happy occasion. It means that someone has found love which is wonderful, isn't it?

Personally, I believe that Nigerians 'hype' marriage too much but I agree that being married to the right person can be a beautiful experience.

Well, except we are talking of Nairaland guys.

I agree with everything you said.

Lol @ found love.

Marriage is beautiful if you marry the right person.
Treat the right person right.
Don't let people's opinions shape your home.
Respect each other.
Take time out every week to enjoy yourselves. Don't have more kids than you can take care of.
Enjoy each other's company
No third party in anyway.

Hathor5:


You have described the stress that comes with having very young children and not with marriage as such.

But kids grow! In my brother's house the three kids who are all in primary school prepare their breakfast alone. Their parents teach them how to take care of themselves and there is no longer 'I want this, I don't like this'. My brother enjoys his coffee.

And when you ask him what makes him happy, he will tell you that it is his family. They are currently considering having a fourth child.

If it was that bad, they would not. They aren't mad.

Different strokes ...

I never said marriage was bad. Aunty Hathor5. Don't misquote me. I also replied someone that, what I cited was just an aspect of marriage. Besides, before they become independent, the couple will know the amount of trouble they would have gone through to achieve that.

Again, this is just an aspect of the so many cons of marriage life.

Your uncle had better continue enjoying his coffee and forget about having another baby. .
It's not easy to train children in old age.

Different strokes for different folks, if there is anything that has ever made me feel totally happy is my marriage and family, wonderful kids and an amazing hubby, what more could I asked?

I don't know about men, but as a lady marriage earns you lots of respect, take it or leave it, marriage is no childs play for the irresponsible ones, that's why if you don't prepare yourself ready, u will come out of it within six months.
I see no negative reasons any woman can dwell on if u are married to the right man, but one of the advantages of being single is your freedom to do as you like in ur life, cuz if u married u have to start viewing things from another angle of life entirely.

pocohantas:


Well, except we are talking of Nairaland guys.

I agree with everything you said.

Lol @ found love.

Because you smart.

No it isn't.

Advantages;

1. Someone to raise children with.
2. A partner to aid you through life's struggles.
3. A partner to share your highs and lows.
4. A reason to keep existing. Add children to the mix and you will want to live into your late sixties/ early seventies.
5. Shared financial expenses. This is based on luck because many women will look to you for handling bills.
6. Satisfying hypocritical and nosy people's expectations of you. In our country marriage is the highest form of responsibility.
7. Continuing your lineage and culture through the children.

Disadvantages;

1. A burden through life. Eventually most marriages devolve to this.
2. A reason to want to end life. A bad wife is a fate worse than death.
3. Finding out in the long run that matrimony and/or child raising is not for you.
4. Shame, constant shame, if your wife is a philanderer.

Shun what people say. If marriage is not in your plans there is no reason to jump into it. Make enough money to take care of future children and find someone willing to bear your seed. There is always a woman who likes you so much that she will.

Favfables1:


Haba na!!!
You can get all this things even without getting married ...

And besides sef, a lot of married couples lack one or more of what you listed on their homes...

How many couples do you see kissing in public and how frequent ((public display of love))??

Don't mind all these fuckers. Life is more enjoyable when u are single than married. I know a of people that are married but in bondage

The way the society polish it, is what surprises me

Babe

I feel like you are trying to consolidate yourself, which is fine. But the truth is that, married or not.. you will still encounter stress in your life. It’s something you can’t avoid. You will still have worries and sadness. The older you get especially as a woman, the less you will want to do it all on your own. It’s just in our nature. Most men of this generation are not going to sit back and allow you to do it all, contrary to what you read on social media. Most men help their wives, they just don’t come out to say it. When you have kids, taking care of them becomes like second nature. It becomes a part of you. Watching them grow is the happiest thing you will ever encounter in life, nothing can replace that feeling. I’m all for women choosing to stay single if that’s what YOU want to do. But what I find with a lot of single women, is that they try to comfort themselves with exaggerated lies, and it doesn’t make sense.

Mercychen:
To me, nothing really special about marriage because I've moved closely with married people and all i see is stress, stress and more stress!

Imagine the daily routine of a woman. Especially those who are not working.

Wake up early ( when youre not ready)
Prep the children for school.
Prepare their food breakfast.
If hubby is nice, he'll help drop them off otherwise, you do the school runs.

You get home and start putting the house in order. And attend to other chores staring you in the face. Time is ticking

Get ready to prepare lunch.
Then before you know it, it's time to go pick the kids.
Come back, freshen them up.
Serve them
Attend to their home work.

The you get set for dinner so hubby can have something to eat when he gets home. Before you know it, the day is gone and you're fagged out. Same thing continues tomorrow and on and on until....

Imagine if you're a working Mom and now have to combine all these with work...

Now tell me what will make a single viewing all these want to get married?

Truth be told, that's another thing I calculate and i relax and continue enjoying my single life.

Many married women are not happy. They are silently crying!!!
Forget all that fake smile they wear when they come out. They are not happy

Even the men are not 100% fulfilled. Responsibility wan break their neck.

Let's tell ourselves the truth. Even if you're rich, it's still not that easy.

I've seen a rich couple who both drove madly to school at the same time to pick their ward and were reigning heavy curses at each other at the gate because they both argued earlier on who's going to pick the son. So it's like non of them wanted to come and it was already evening and the boy was still in school.

I guess they called the house and the nanny who was babysitting their twin babies then, told them the boy was not home.

Omor.. see the speed they drove into the school compound with. Wify packed one side, hubby parked the other way and they both jumped out of their cars rushing Into the school and abusing each other.

Wife : " You shouldn't have come" useless man" As she stormed into the classroom

Man: ori e ko pe. why did you come? You should have remained at work"

Hmmm... So much hype about marriage. Abegi!

The most special thing about marriage is true companionship. It transcends having regular sex and eating homemade food.

One thing humans fear the most is being and dying alone.

Mercychen:
To me, nothing really special about marriage because I've moved closely with married people and all i see is stress, stress and more stress!

Imagine the daily routine of a woman. Especially those who are not working.

Wake up early ( when youre not ready)
Prep the children for school.
Prepare their food breakfast.
If hubby is nice, he'll help drop them off otherwise, you do the school runs.

You get home and start putting the house in order. And attend to other chores staring you in the face. Time is ticking

Get ready to prepare lunch.
Then before you know it, it's time to go pick the kids.
Come back, freshen them up.
Serve them
Attend to their home work.

The you get set for dinner so hubby can have something to eat when he gets home. Before you know it, the day is gone and you're fagged out. Same thing continues tomorrow and on and on until....

Imagine if you're a working Mom and now have to combine all these with work...

Now tell me what will make a single viewing all these want to get married?

Truth be told, that's another thing I calculate and i relax and continue enjoying my single life.

Many married women are not happy. They are silently crying!!!
Forget all that fake smile they wear when they come out. They are not happy

Even the men are not 100% fulfilled. Responsibility wan break their neck.

Let's tell ourselves the truth. Even if you're rich, it's still not that easy.

I've seen a rich couple who both drove madly to school at the same time to pick their ward and were reigning heavy curses at each other at the gate because they both argued earlier on who's going to pick the son. So it's like non of them wanted to come and it was already evening and the boy was still in school.

I guess they called the house and the nanny who was babysitting their twin babies then, told them the boy was not home.

Omor.. see the speed they drove into the school compound with. Wify packed one side, hubby parked the other way and they both jumped out of their cars rushing Into the school and abusing each other.

Wife : " You shouldn't have come" useless man" As she stormed into the classroom

Man: ori e ko pe. why did you come? You should have remained at work"

Hmmm... So much hype about marriage. Abegi!

Never condemn what you want.
Be true to yourself.
Marriage to the right person is a blessing.
Children in marriage give you a sense of purpose. They make life struggle worth it. They give meaning to life.

Marriage certificate is compulsory for promotion in certain work place. Also you cannot assume managerial/superintendent position in some offices unless you are married.

If I could right now.....
I would.
That is when u know u are up to something... I mean chasing something.

Been alone makes me think selfish and carefree.
But you can't be careless if your Son hasn't eaten. Son
Unless u are useless and irresponsible.

free nacks, cuddles and companionship. outside this three, nothing else for men

U are focused and dedicated to a family System that can be traced and identifyed and It’s not mandatory.