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The Harsh Things Your Wife Has Ever Told You. - Family (7) - Nairaland

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Re: The Harsh Things Your Wife Has Ever Told You. by Nobody: 2:50pm On Nov 19, 2021
janvier27:
Jobs are never there for ever. Invest for the future when the opportunity is there. OP, it's also tough on wife & she's human. More than one child is there to cater for. If I were you OP, I would never have returned home to be fed by wife no matter what I'd done for her in the past. Rather I'd have relocated to somewhere with good prospects & struggle it out. If you knock head continuously on wall, one thing must give way; the head breaks or the wall opens. You'll keep in touch with family from wherever & send whatever you can till you find your feet. Every problem has expiry date where there's discipline and determination. Best wishes.

Boss man...

You made a very interesting contribution...
However please don't excuse the wives behavior under the pretext of "it's tough on her and she's only human"...
The man too is also human!!! And it's also tough on him!!!

He's facing lots of societal pressure right now ((you should know how the society sees jobless married men)) , the least thing he wants now is disrespect from the one person who vowed to stand by him "in sickness and in health...in want and in plenty"...

When things were awk, the man was treating her well ((at least we can draw that much from his post)), if the man wasn't, then he definitely deserves this... And now that things are bad, shouldn't she be supportive?? Isn't now the perfect time to put her vows to work?? Why is she acting like, it has always been like this??

It's not fair na...

5 Likes

Re: The Harsh Things Your Wife Has Ever Told You. by JohnAOne: 2:51pm On Nov 19, 2021
faoogoke:
I was jobless for over 5 years.

Me and my wife struggled through it.

It was very hard and tough but we struck together.

Now God did it for me beyond our imagination.

I brought her a car for her faithfulness.

All women at not the same
Nice testimony. From your experience, what should one look out for to find a woman like your wife? Thanks.
Re: The Harsh Things Your Wife Has Ever Told You. by membranus: 2:52pm On Nov 19, 2021
Lucas4903:
It's often funny how it's easy to put blame on the women when. Situation like this rises. Bro please just like someone said, try to invest more on urself and I pray ur situation changes. I remember when my dad was in ur shoes and mumsy use to give attitude cos she expected him to do some certain things and meet some certain people which could have changed everything but then that's life and women see things from a diff perspective sometimes. We thank God we are past that stage of life and mum and dad are still together living their life.

Please reach out to me let me see if my few contacts can do some tricks.

God Bless You.

I hope the OP will read this.
Re: The Harsh Things Your Wife Has Ever Told You. by chinchonglee(m): 2:54pm On Nov 19, 2021
Useku:
This is always the case when a guy loses his job or business.

Action plan, apply for your 25% pension fund.

Start a biz immediately, no matter how small.

Channel all your energy on the biz and provide only feeding allowance for now while your wife takes other bills or fork off from your house.

If your below 40 try searching for another job but if your above 40 face the biz squarely and grow it.

Lesson

If you got a job under 30, ensure you get a land on the outskirt of your city and fight to build at least a miniflat before spending any rubbish money on wedding!

Take a loan, suffer, but have a place you can hibernate in the event of any unfortunate incident.

Wives are never good back up plans,they will definitely desert you when life gets tough!

Don't spend a dime on marriage until you have secured yourself!

And if you are already married now with a working spouse, cut your current family expenses, force your wife to pick bills while you hurriedly get a small house for the family.

Any woman wet no gree cooperate,discard her sharply.

If you sacrifice your all,and nothing to fall back on,woman go abuse you,leave you when better option shows up while you fit develop bp,stroke and finally poof.

Stay woke bras!

Happy international men day!



Come meet me for marina make i finish you with bottles of your brand plus Nkwobi to back it up...

Some men are fools no matter how you advice them..
They jst dnt have sense...
I won't spend a dime on wedding or stupid bride price when i haven't secured myself... I jst dey watch some of my school mates dey run go marry.. one was earning jst 100k and went into marriage kon dey tell me to marry with the little i have now. I jst laugh.

6 Likes 2 Shares

Re: The Harsh Things Your Wife Has Ever Told You. by marsup: 2:55pm On Nov 19, 2021
Hope you are not the type that will sit at home all day, and expect her to come back from work, cook and clean the house? It's possible she has a different story to tell.
Try and get another job, don't be quick to bring marital problems to the public. All is well that ends well.
Good luck.
Re: The Harsh Things Your Wife Has Ever Told You. by Maj196(m): 2:56pm On Nov 19, 2021
The earlier you know there's no true love the better. Women are only out there to milk the next victim. I always advice guys love and work on yourself first. Those vagina people doesn't love us

5 Likes

Re: The Harsh Things Your Wife Has Ever Told You. by Nobody: 2:56pm On Nov 19, 2021
Bola146:
She is human being, pray for her. I pray that you see a good job, a married man who lost his job is like someone who lost half of his life. You can tell people here who can help you to get a job. Best luck

So the man is what?? A robot?? And who should pray for who more in this case?? The man?? Or the woman?? And if the man should pray for her, what would the content of his prayer point be?? "Father Lord, help my wife respect me... Amen"

That man is under serious pressure right now... And when you're under pressure, face facts, sometimes even to pray is difficult!! What that guy needs from his wife is her support and understanding not all this crap she's doing...

Was the man treating her like this when things were awk?? So why all this attitude now that things are a bit shaky??

Sighs and shakes head...
At least now we know why she got married to him...

2 Likes

Re: The Harsh Things Your Wife Has Ever Told You. by djon78(m): 2:57pm On Nov 19, 2021
Denvacandy:
We got married in 2018 and things where going smooth, i was working with a company in port harcourt and i can bodly say i was very okay, taking flight is not an issue.

When she wanted to give birth to our first child, it was through CS and i paid every damn bills amounting to 500k or so.

We moved down to ogun state and i was taking flight monthly to see her from port harcourt.

Fast forward to 2020, the comapny fold up and i lost my job, i came down to ogun fully with my wife and everything went down, feeding was hard and my savings is drying up.

You know how woman do and how to satisfy them so my savings eventually dried up and the reality was down.

She applied for a teaching job at govt school and she got employed and i was always at home.

Do she was supportive but its didnt took long when she changed and started treating me badly.

I was so sad the day she utter all terirble words to me, on how have not been a good husband and how i have not been dropping money for food and co.

how i have not been taking care of her, i almost moved to tears and i refused to eat her food for some period, i was being supported by a street friend.

How can someone you have sacrificed so much for all of a sudden change and bring out thier true color.


True test of life is not when things are going Rosy. But you know reality when things are not going fine.

I believe it is even better for a man to start his marriage from when things are tough

That way, you will know your spouse early enough. Know her antecedents, so you will not be surprised

3 Likes

Re: The Harsh Things Your Wife Has Ever Told You. by na2016: 2:57pm On Nov 19, 2021
habsydiamond:
Uncle the best way of bringing peace to ur home is by gaining ur position back as the head of the family.... When women are put in such position they can't handle it cos they were not made to be so.. That's for married couples oo.. Try getting a job or go into business that will give u an edge over her... With that u will have ur home back... If not oga u never see anything ooo...

You are just justifying RUBBISH and I pity everyone that liked this rubbish you wrote.
It is the duty of the wife to ensure that the house and her husband are doing fine at such a period that the husband is yet to have a job. She has absolutely no reason to treat the husband as shit just because he is not bringing in money again. This is a major reason so many men die very early.
Husband, what you need to do now is to look for any job and start again. This time, be careful since you know the kind of wife you have.

7 Likes

Re: The Harsh Things Your Wife Has Ever Told You. by Tenshades(m): 2:57pm On Nov 19, 2021
cloud:
you will understand better when you get married

So every married man must have disrespectful woman as a wife in the name of being married?

BTW, that's your opinion and there's nothing wrong with it grin
Re: The Harsh Things Your Wife Has Ever Told You. by Stomoney(m): 2:58pm On Nov 19, 2021
Issokay cry
authority2006:


You still need to heal yourself from the betrayal and disappointment and get over it because you're yet to.
Re: The Harsh Things Your Wife Has Ever Told You. by Useku(m): 2:58pm On Nov 19, 2021
chinchonglee:

Come meet me for marina make i finish you with bottles of your brand plus Nkwobi to back it up...

Some men are fools no matter how you advice them..
They jst dnt have sense...
I won't spend a dime on wedding or stupid bride price when i haven't secured myself... I jst dey watch some of my school mates dey run go marry.. one was earning jst 100k and went into marriage tell me to marry with the little i have now. I jst laugh.


Thanks brother, I full ground, we go still gather dey!

Cheers
Re: The Harsh Things Your Wife Has Ever Told You. by Dizzyyish: 2:58pm On Nov 19, 2021
Tenshades:
I believe you saw a red flag before marrying her but you chose to ignore the obvious signs that she was going to belittle you when you're financially down.

Now it has happened...emm...

Over to the elders in the building...

"When you wear rose-tinted glasses, red flags just look like flags"

Sex and looks are two of the major reasons men overlook red flags, and then later it 'appears' as if the woman just "changed".

2 Likes

Re: The Harsh Things Your Wife Has Ever Told You. by Nobody: 2:59pm On Nov 19, 2021
dancewith:
Na so. This is relatively common. Your sin is to have lost your job when you have a wife ready to spend the money therefrom
This is a warning to all men. Never ever lose your job, you have a wife that won't tolerate the loss of money. Like hell, what do you want her to do?

Seriously her mates are wearing Bone Straight and pinner four. How dare you go broke

Op better hijack a job at SPDC and make her happy again

Case closed, Problem solved

What are you talking?!
Didn't you read that the company folded up?? Was that his fault??
Re: The Harsh Things Your Wife Has Ever Told You. by Oceanfield: 3:02pm On Nov 19, 2021
Pidginwhisper:
#TeamForeign

Hahahaha shocked
Re: The Harsh Things Your Wife Has Ever Told You. by taylormed2(m): 3:03pm On Nov 19, 2021
Same thing my mother did to my father, when my dad retired in my year one, she started getting annoyed at everything looking for the smallest reason to blame him for not planning financially. Me, I knew all those were excuses cause I read her messages, and she had been seeing someone else. She was just looking for a reason to justify her departure do that people would blame the man instead. Since then I told myself marriage no go near me angry

15 Likes 1 Share

Re: The Harsh Things Your Wife Has Ever Told You. by Nobody: 3:04pm On Nov 19, 2021
A million likes to this!!!
"Wives are never good back plans"
As much as I hate generalizing, this quote happens to be true in almost a 100% of the time...

Nice one...

Useku:
This is always the case when a guy loses his job or business.

Action plan, apply for your 25% pension fund.

Start a biz immediately, no matter how small.

Channel all your energy on the biz and provide only feeding allowance for now while your wife takes other bills or fork off from your house.

If your below 40 try searching for another job but if your above 40 face the biz squarely and grow it.

Lesson

If you got a job under 30, ensure you get a land on the outskirt of your city and fight to build at least a miniflat before spending any rubbish money on wedding!

Take a loan, suffer, but have a place you can hibernate in the event of any unfortunate incident.

Wives are never good back up plans,they will definitely desert you when life gets tough!

Don't spend a dime on marriage until you have secured yourself!

And if you are already married now with a working spouse, cut your current family expenses, force your wife to pick bills while you hurriedly get a small house for the family.

Any woman wet no gree cooperate,discard her sharply.

If you sacrifice your all,and nothing to fall back on,woman go abuse you,leave you when better option shows up while you fit develop bp,stroke and finally poof.

Stay woke bras!

Happy international men day!



Re: The Harsh Things Your Wife Has Ever Told You. by kenchop: 3:04pm On Nov 19, 2021
THE BOTTOM LINE IS THAT YOU MARRIED A BAD WOMAN. THERE ARE UPS AND DOWNS IN LIFE , EVERYONE GOES THROUGH ROUGH PATCHES ,EVEN THE BILLIONAIRES YOU HEAR OF TODAY HAD THEIR ROUGH PATCHES. SO WHEN YOUR WOMAN CHANGES SIMPLY because YOU ARE GOING THROUGH A ROUGH TIME IT MEANS YOU MADE A MISTAKE IN MARRIAGE. LET ME ASK YOU, IF YOU GET BACK ON YOUR FEET NOW AND BECOME RICH AGAIN WILL YOU STILL LOVE HER THE WAY YOU DID INITIALLY? I GUESS YOUR ANSWER IS NO, COS YOU HAVE SEEN HER TRUE NATURE.
THANKS




Denvacandy:
We got married in 2018 and things where going smooth, i was working with a company in port harcourt and i can bodly say i was very okay, taking flight is not an issue.

When she wanted to give birth to our first child, it was through CS and i paid every damn bills amounting to 500k or so.

We moved down to ogun state and i was taking flight monthly to see her from port harcourt.

Fast forward to 2020, the comapny fold up and i lost my job, i came down to ogun fully with my wife and everything went down, feeding was hard and my savings is drying up.

You know how woman do and how to satisfy them so my savings eventually dried up and the reality was down.

She applied for a teaching job at govt school and she got employed and i was always at home.

Do she was supportive but its didnt took long when she changed and started treating me badly.

I was so sad the day she utter all terirble words to me, on how have not been a good husband and how i have not been dropping money for food and co.

how i have not been taking care of her, i almost moved to tears and i refused to eat her food for some period, i was being supported by a street friend.

How can someone you have sacrificed so much for all of a sudden change and bring out thier true color.

3 Likes

Re: The Harsh Things Your Wife Has Ever Told You. by Dagr8tosyn: 3:05pm On Nov 19, 2021
@devacandy, please erase the mindset of Joblessness or you lost your Job and face life for real...Go to the street as a man and prove to the world you can make it, there are more than 1m Jobs waiting for someone to grab and so many businesses also waiting for someone to start doing them depending on the area. There are areas in Lagos as big as it is without phone repairer, if you go to Computer Village and sleep there for two to three months you will become a champion in phone repair if only you can humble yourself to learn, get the knowledge and move to where there is no phone engineer and make cool money. That is just one out of so many hustles. You can also be sourcing for another employment to bounce back on the other hand.

When you make it or get some balance then you can get a better woman, the lesson from your past relationship is that there are fake lovers for real, a lot of women love men for what they see in them or hope to get now or in future. Only very few Nigeria ladies will love you for who you are for real. It has always been what is in it for me from their side too, so watch it, life is a game, play wisely and live better. Do not fall for their tricks, pretty make up look, sweet voice, curves, front or back but what can they also put on the table in the name of real love too. Cheers!

2 Likes

Re: The Harsh Things Your Wife Has Ever Told You. by Asour: 3:05pm On Nov 19, 2021
Nyanabo:
When money dey friend go dey, when money no dey friend go go.

Go an look for a job. Stop wallowing in self-pity.

Looking for a job does not preclude him for airing his views/grievances. He can do both.

1 Like

Re: The Harsh Things Your Wife Has Ever Told You. by Nobody: 3:05pm On Nov 19, 2021
She's acting according to the training she received, if care is not taken she may left you,
Next time when you want to invest in your partner you need to study such a person very well though we have not heard from her
Re: The Harsh Things Your Wife Has Ever Told You. by Useku(m): 3:07pm On Nov 19, 2021
Favfables1:
A million likes to this!!!
"Wives are never good back plans"
As much as I hate generalizing, this quote happens to be true in almost a 100% of the time...

Nice one...


Thanks my brother, i knew that in time and it really paid off,
Re: The Harsh Things Your Wife Has Ever Told You. by showafrica(m): 3:08pm On Nov 19, 2021
Useku:
This is always the case when a guy loses his job or business.

Action plan, apply for your 25% pension fund.

Start a biz immediately, no matter how small.

Channel all your energy on the biz and provide only feeding allowance for now while your wife takes other bills or fork off from your house.

If your below 40 try searching for another job but if your above 40 face the biz squarely and grow it.

Lesson

If you got a job under 30, ensure you get a land on the outskirt of your city and fight to build at least a miniflat before spending any rubbish money on wedding!

Take a loan, suffer, but have a place you can hibernate in the event of any unfortunate incident.

Wives are never good back up plans,they will definitely desert you when life gets tough!

Don't spend a dime on marriage until you have secured yourself!

And if you are already married now with a working spouse, cut your current family expenses, force your wife to pick bills while you hurriedly get a small house for the family.

Any woman wet no gree cooperate,discard her sharply.

If you sacrifice your all,and nothing to fall back on,woman go abuse you,leave you when better option shows up while you fit develop bp,stroke and finally poof.

Stay woke bras!

Happy international men day!




Best advice so far...
Re: The Harsh Things Your Wife Has Ever Told You. by Asour: 3:09pm On Nov 19, 2021
Mavor:
MGTOW bro!!!! I'm single and I love my peace of mind right now.

Singleness =\= MGTOW.

And please stop following labels. Just my suggestion. All labels (on human grouping & behaviour) are wrong & lack nuance.

1 Like

Re: The Harsh Things Your Wife Has Ever Told You. by Nobody: 3:09pm On Nov 19, 2021
Mariangeles:


So, your idea to marry a wife is to exploit her?
You don't want a wife, you want a slave.

He is right to register the business in his name as long as its his money.

Don't tell me that two become one crap, na for only man money that one dey happen.

We can actually see how she's treating her husband with her own money.

1 Like

Re: The Harsh Things Your Wife Has Ever Told You. by Epeegee(m): 3:10pm On Nov 19, 2021
I pity that man that's planning to marry you
Re: The Harsh Things Your Wife Has Ever Told You. by Lush100(m): 3:10pm On Nov 19, 2021
How much red flag do you want to see during courtship.
Except maybe laziness and anger and maybe lying. She would put a good behavior all through
You aren't likely to detect any red flag.
Bro, that's what women do,(short memory and worshipper of money forming holy)
Even when i lost my job, abt 10 yrs go she took a teaching job while i was still paying her salary of abt 20-30k evry month back then, she still treated me badly.
When i got a job later,
I stayed away from the house for 3 months Dec to feb. She was now asking me why i was not coming home.
Things aren't too well in Nigeria economically so you would see many homes experiencing such

3 Likes

Re: The Harsh Things Your Wife Has Ever Told You. by millionboi(m): 3:12pm On Nov 19, 2021
Quaddafi29:
Marriage to Naija woman is hellish. Only a handful of them are humans. If you can avoid it, please do and get your kids somehow.
Are you married?
Re: The Harsh Things Your Wife Has Ever Told You. by Useku(m): 3:12pm On Nov 19, 2021
showafrica:


Best advice so far...

Thanks brother
Re: The Harsh Things Your Wife Has Ever Told You. by msrcusgarvey6(m): 3:14pm On Nov 19, 2021
[/i]So you don't feel how unstable incomes are these days. From our days of working as teachers in primary, secondary schools,sorting letters at P&T, joining ITF or working as a cashier in a high street bank while awaiting WASC results to this times you know better than me as graduates, post graduates. Would anyone ever look more mature and compatible as it was? No!
NotBeenPaid:

[i]The complains from couples is becoming too much these days. Seems more like they're no compatible spouses out there. People get married these days not because they're matured enough but because they feel they're old enough to. And the peer pressure too.

Re: The Harsh Things Your Wife Has Ever Told You. by almarthins(m): 3:14pm On Nov 19, 2021
Gwan2:
OP, allow me to indulge you.

Most times, women love, romance and respectful gestures are usually associated with the ability of the man to provide sustainably. Know this and know peace.

Now, you could afford to earn just a little of those aforementioned gestures, not completely though, if you were sincerely faithful and honest with her during your hey days. Not just with your finance…your attention, friendship and companionship with her.

But, you will encounter the full wrath of the woman when the table turns, and you were not fulfilling those aforementioned obligations, or probably not so efficient, regardless of the financial empowerment.

Honey na money
Re: The Harsh Things Your Wife Has Ever Told You. by Integrafamoo: 3:14pm On Nov 19, 2021
Denvacandy:
We got married in 2018 and things where going smooth, i was working with a company in port harcourt and i can bodly say i was very okay, taking flight is not an issue.

When she wanted to give birth to our first child, it was through CS and i paid every damn bills amounting to 500k or so.

We moved down to ogun state and i was taking flight monthly to see her from port harcourt.

Fast forward to 2020, the comapny fold up and i lost my job, i came down to ogun fully with my wife and everything went down, feeding was hard and my savings is drying up.

You know how woman do and how to satisfy them so my savings eventually dried up and the reality was down.

She applied for a teaching job at govt school and she got employed and i was always at home.

Do she was supportive but its didnt took long when she changed and started treating me badly.

I was so sad the day she utter all terirble words to me, on how have not been a good husband and how i have not been dropping money for food and co.

how i have not been taking care of her, i almost moved to tears and i refused to eat her food for some period, i was being supported by a street friend.

How can someone you have sacrificed so much for all of a sudden change and bring out thier true color.
99% of our ladies would behave similarly. May God restore your losses

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