Hello everyone...I'm in dire need of your critical and honest opinions. It is going to be a long read, I deeply apologize in advance.

My relationship of about four years ended a week ago and the circumstances surrounding the break up were highly unforeseen, everything happened too quickly.

So my boyfriend and I have been together for about four years, we were very intentional about each other. Our love was a very deep one, we connected on a lot of levels, shared mutual friends, I know his family and he knows some of mine and we hardly had issues save for the usual petty squabbles which we resolved ASAP.

But the whole trouble started less than 3 weeks ago. We had our usual conversations the Sunday preceeding the week everything went downhill, everything was absolutely well between us. By the following Monday evening, I tried reaching out to him to catch up on how his day went, he didn't answer his phone. I chatted him up but his response was very unlike him. I thought he was just stressed from work and would get back to himself in no time.

However, he failed to do as I expected and I became very worried and disturbed, this was already going to 2 weeks. I had to call him up one night and asked him to tell me what ever the problem is, I honestly felt he was going through some deep stuff. He later got in touch with me and promised to come by my place the next day so he could explain himself in person.

He came as promised, he appeared very gloomy and was far from his normal self. We got talking in his car, he kept saying he doesn't understand himself anymore and he messed up badly this time around.

He dropped the news that he had something with another girl in that space of less than two weeks. He said it was going to be an innocent hangout but he can't even tell how everything went down eventually, the girl later slept over at his place.
He broke down in tears, told me that he couldn't stand the guilt of what he did, didnt want to drag me into the mess and that was why he couldn't bring himself to talk to me or act like nothing happened.

There's a more disturbing side to what he later told me. He said he had what seemed like a spiritual attack in the middle of the night. Apparently, the girl was in the house when it happened (he stays in the house alone). According to him, the inverter in the house went off and he left the room where they were together to sleep in one of the sitting areas in the house because of heat. He was asleep when he sensed something very heavy and unusual, he opened his eyes and right in front of him was a dark, tall and hairy creature. The thing kept staring at him and he felt being drained, couldn't move or say a word till it walked away. He was completely scared, he summoned strength, stood up , ran into another room and made some frantic calls to their church priests and they prayed with him. He insisted it wasn't a dream, that he was wide awake when he saw what he saw. He also added that he looked into the room the girl was sleeping, she was still asleep and most likely didn't know what happened to him.

He told me he hasn't been himself since that experience and would genuinely not have told me anything but he has been really scared.
I got really worried at this point and had ask who the girl is. He finally opened up that he met her last year, they chatted for a while but they somehow lost contacts since last year, only for them to reconnect not too long ago this year, hence, the initial hangout. I asked how well he knows her but he broke down again and said he barely knows her, doesn't know her school or anything.

I was completely heartbroken and wondered how he could soil four years in less than 2 weeks. We cried together and he pleaded with me, that I have done nothing but loved and stood by him throughout the years.
At that point to be honest, I was pained but I was less concerned about the fact that he cheated on me, I was deeply scared and worried about the attack. He said he has been having some routine prayer sessions and he also asked me to pray with him in the car, I did pray for him with all of my heart. He thanked me profusely and burst into another heart-rending crying session. I had to console and encourage him, that he should try to draw closer to God this period and he is going to be fine again.

Since the night he told me everything, we've just been checking on each other and he said he's been indoor a lot since then and still can't sleep or stay alone in the dark.
Now to the very ending part of my tale, I asked him to come around my place last night. He came and whilst we were talking, his phone rang and he got out of the car to receive the call. He came back in to the car and again, his phone rang and he had to tell me the girl was the one calling. I became very livid and surprised that he's still in touch with her even after the whole attack episode cos we can't even tell where it came from.

I asked him to show me her name, he succumbed. My people, my boyfriend saved this girl's name and added kissing emojis. Something he never ever does, he is the type that saves every contact with their full name, including his siblings. Save for the nicknames he saved my number and his bro with, I hardly saw nicknames on his contact list talk less of adding emojis. I knew that was the height of it all and asked him how, he said it was the girl that took his phone and saved her number like that. I'm like, what? In a space of how many weeks and she's got that kinda control on you already?

I told him the action any right thinking person would have taken after the attack would be to, atleast keep away from her and even me cos who knows where it all came from. He said he tried cos he hasn't even been getting jobs since this whole thing started but the issue now is, the girl is claiming she's pregnant for him and has been all over him, professing love and all in the space of less than 3weeks. According to him, he has told just a friend apart from me..he hasn't informed any of his siblings and been keeping to himself, trying to figure how he got into all the mess.

I know my story doesn't add up But then, this guy is someone I can vouch for his integrity and bluntness, he'd never stoop so low and start telling all these scary lies just to do away with me. It costs him absolutely nothing to just tell me, he's done with us and walk away.

We knew we were completely done with each other last night and I'm just thankful that I didn't get myself into any mess with him, no bad feeling at all. I feel more of pity for him cos this incident could totally change the course of his life, he is a struggling young guy still trying to find his right footing in life. I'm more worried that he hasn't told his brother any of this, (they are pretty close but his bro doesn't stay in the country) more like he is shielding everything and dying in silence.

He betrayed my love for him and I'm moving on fine, albeit, hard. I just don't want a situation whereby the whole thing is beyond mere eyes and he is weak, he is keeping to himself without talking out so his loved ones could take necessary actions.

I'm not even sure I want this to get to the front page, I only want honest and critical views
.

In any case, wishing you all the best. I could not read the long essay.

He too long wetin self... But I go try read am

Airnigma:

I'm really sorry about the length of my post..please read and give your opinion. Thanks

My sister... Something must happen for another thing to happen... It's so unfortunate ur now ex guy failed or fell by the way side of ur kind, she played her game well and she won the match so comfortably... Your guy will forever regret this action... But there's little or nothing he could do, when a woman is out there to destroy she can do anything...

As for spiritual attact bla bla bla... I will leave that to the more I experienced people... But you should be thanking God you are not part of the mess... It would be hard dear, but you just have to pick up urself and move on with life... I just pray God will guide you well next time...

Bigredmachine:
He too long wetin self... But I go try read am

I'm really sorry about the length of my post..please read and give your opinion. Thanks

amnesty7:
In any case, wishing you all the best. I could not read the long essay.

Please do, I'm sorry.

Let me be real with you OP;

This matter strong like agbo and erujeje mixed together.

I believe beyond relationship, you guys are friends, and what does a friend do when his/her friend needs help? They don't abandon them.

Help him. In anyway you can. Do so, while making it clear that the relationship is over.

Shalom.

The matter tie wrapper

Become a lesbian, and you will never have to worry about boys again.

End time relationship

The truth is alot of girls are desperate. And when they notice a guy is weak they grabbed him with all might, charms or whatever. They don't play games or wait for marriage. They jump in with strategies.

And most guys don't know when a girl is desperate they mistake it as love. It only tells on them after babes coming in.

The girls use iron hand to snatch or get hold of men. And the truth is she has succeeded with the look of things. Just only prayer and God himself can change anything for him at this moment.

The girl has been living in his house all this two weeks he was not in contact with you. Cook for him and shows him love. And they have been banging all the while with the girl intension to get pregnant for him.

It was when the girl got pregnant he was trying to get back to his senses but it's too late.

The guy still want the girl. Even if for the baby.
The handwriting is on the wall.

Sorry dear. Just move on. You have lost this one except you want to fight dirty and don't even dare a pregnant woman. She can go far to achieve anything at this moment.

Not gonna lie, you write really well and your punctuation usage is 10/10.

I think you’ve made the right moves so far.

You gave him a second chance, prayed for him, he still went back.

I have nothing to type than


OMO!!

Bigredmachine:
He too long wetin self... But I go try read am



My sister... Something must happen for another thing to happen... It's so unfortunate ur now ex guy failed or fell by the way side of ur kind, she played her game well and she won the match so comfortably... Your guy will forever regret this action... But there's little or nothing he could do, when a woman is out there to destroy she can do anything...

As for spiritual attact bla bla bla... I will leave that to the more I experienced people... But you should be thanking God you are not part of the mess... It would be hard dear, but you just have to pick up urself and move on with life... I just pray God will guide you well next time...

Thanks for your words. It is very hard I must say, I didn't know heartbreak felt this bad. I definitely trust God to strengthen me through this period

Ocholu:
Let me be real with you OP;

This matter strong like agbo and erujeje mixed together.

I believe beyond relationship, you guys are friends, and what does a friend do when his/her friend needs help? They don't abandon them.

Help him. In anyway you can. Do so, while making it clear that the relationship is over.

Shalom.

We were friends even before we started dating and that's why I'm looking beyond the betrayal. But as it is now, my hands are tied. There's very little I can do to help other than to continue praying for him if he is really in a mess

This your matter too choke.
Wait, make I go drink water first.

fineboynl:
The truth is alot of girls are desperate......Sorry dear. Just move on. You have lost this one except you want to fight dirty and don't even dare a pregnant woman. She can go far to achieve anything at this moment.

I really don't know what to think of the situation, it was too drastic and sudden, he gave me no soft landing at all...like 4years gone just like that??
I wish I could fight for him but nah, I can't tread that path for him again. I hold absolutely nothing against him and I hope he finds true peace

SenecaTheYonger:
Not gonna lie, you write really well and your punctuation usage is 10/10.

I think you’ve made the right moves so far.

You gave him a second chance, prayed for him, he still went back.

Thanks for the compliment and input.

greencard:
The matter tie wrapper

seriously

He was hallucinating because I don't think there actually was a tall dark hairy whatever.

Take him to a shrink. I don't know if this country has any

Before I read to that part of pregnancy I already predict it, my guy don Japa.
Aunty this is one those long Con.

Aunty leave that nigga and move on

Move on asap

As in asap

E go be

Modified: Omo I just checked your dp , Omo you sef fine now

Airnigma:


I really don't know what to think of the situation, it was too drastic and sudden, he gave me no soft landing at all...like 4years gone just like that??
I wish I could fight for him but nah, I can't tread that path for him again. I hold absolutely nothing against him and I hope he finds true peace

then take it like it was never yours.

This story long and whenever a story gets spiritual, I become bored therefore I cannot finish the story thank u

The guy knows what he is doing…if you’ve known him for 4 years as someone that is level headed, calm and straightforward, how can he just change overnight?

I dare say he had all of this ‘guy man’ traits all along, just maybe you didn’t notice. A babe can’t have such a strong hold on you within a very short time without you letting her. By letting her, I mean giving her the signs to say ‘ I’m yours for the taking’.

Airnigma:
Hello everyone...I'm in dire need of your critical and honest opinions. It is going to be a long read, I deeply apologize in advance.

My relationship of about four years ended a week ago and the circumstances surrounding the break up were highly unforeseen, everything happened too quickly.

So my boyfriend and I have been together for about four years, we were very intentional about each other. Our love was a very deep one, we connected on a lot of levels, shared mutual friends, I know his family and he knows some of mine and we hardly had issues save for the usual petty squabbles which we resolved ASAP.

But the whole trouble started less than 3 weeks ago. We had our usual conversations the Sunday preceeding the week everything went downhill, everything was absolutely well between us. By the following Monday evening, I tried reaching out to him to catch up on how his day went, he didn't answer his phone. I chatted him up but his response was very unlike him. I thought he was just stressed from work and would get back to himself in no time.

However, he failed to do as I expected and I became very worried and disturbed, this was already going to 2 weeks. I had to call him up one night and asked him to tell me what ever the problem is, I honestly felt he was going through some deep stuff. He later got in touch with me and promised to come by my place the next day so he could explain himself in person.

He came as promised, he appeared very gloomy and was far from his normal self. We got talking in his car, he kept saying he doesn't understand himself anymore and he messed up badly this time around.

He dropped the news that he had something with another girl in that space of less than two weeks. He said it was going to be an innocent hangout but he can't even tell how everything went down eventually, the girl later slept over at his place.
He broke down in tears, told me that he couldn't stand the guilt of what he did, didnt want to drag me into the mess and that was why he couldn't bring himself to talk to me or act like nothing happened.

There's a more disturbing side to what he later told me. He said he had what seemed like a spiritual attack in the middle of the night. Apparently, the girl was in the house when it happened (he stays in the house alone). According to him, the inverter in the house went off and he left the room where they were together to sleep in one of the sitting areas in the house because of heat. He was asleep when he sensed something very heavy and unusual, he opened his eyes and right in front of him was a dark, tall and hairy creature. The thing kept staring at him and he felt being drained, couldn't move or say a word till it walked away. He was completely scared, he summoned strength, stood up , ran into another room and made some frantic calls to their church priests and they prayed with him. He insisted it wasn't a dream, that he was wide awake when he saw what he saw. He also added that he looked into the room the girl was sleeping, she was still asleep and most likely didn't know what happened to him.

He told me he hasn't been himself since that experience and would genuinely not have told me anything but he has been really scared.
I got really worried at this point and had ask who the girl is. He finally opened up that he met her last year, they chatted for a while but they somehow lost contacts since last year, only for them to reconnect not too long ago this year, hence, the initial hangout. I asked how well he knows her but he broke down again and said he barely knows her, doesn't know her school or anything.

I was completely heartbroken and wondered how he could soil four years in less than 2 weeks. We cried together and he pleaded with me, that I have done nothing but loved and stood by him throughout the years.
At that point to be honest, I was pained but I was less concerned about the fact that he cheated on me, I was deeply scared and worried about the attack. He said he has been having some routine prayer sessions and he also asked me to pray with him in the car, I did pray for him with all of my heart. He thanked me profusely and burst into another heart-rending crying session. I had to console and encourage him, that he should try to draw closer to God this period and he is going to be fine again.

Since the night he told me everything, we've just been checking on each other and he said he's been indoor a lot since then and still can't sleep or stay alone in the dark.
Now to the very ending part of my tale, I asked him to come around my place last night. He came and whilst we were talking, his phone rang and he got out of the car to receive the call. He came back in to the car and again, his phone rang and he had to tell me the girl was the one calling. I became very livid and surprised that he's still in touch with her even after the whole attack episode cos we can't even tell where it came from.

I asked him to show me her name, he succumbed. My people, my boyfriend saved this girl's name and added kissing emojis. Something he never ever does, he is the type that saves every contact with their full name, including his siblings. Save for the nicknames he saved my number and his bro with, I hardly saw nicknames on his contact list talk less of adding emojis. I knew that was the height of it all and asked him how, he said it was the girl that took his phone and saved her number like that. I'm like, what? In a space of how many weeks and she's got that kinda control on you already?

I told him the action any right thinking person would have taken after the attack would be to, atleast keep away from her and even me cos who knows where it all came from. He said he tried cos he hasn't even been getting jobs since this whole thing started but the issue now is, the girl is claiming she's pregnant for him and has been all over him, professing love and all in the space of less than 3weeks. According to him, he has told just a friend apart from me..he hasn't informed any of his siblings and been keeping to himself, trying to figure how he got into all the mess.

I know my story doesn't add up cos he could be lying about everything. But then, this guy is someone I can vouch for his integrity and bluntness, he'd never stoop so low and start telling all these scary lies just to do away with me. It costs him absolutely nothing to just tell me, he's done with us and walk away.

We knew we were completely done with each other last night and I'm just thankful that I didn't get myself into any mess with him, no bad feeling at all. I feel more of pity for him cos this incident could totally change the course of his life, he is a struggling young guy still trying to find his right footing in life. I'm more worried that he hasn't told his brother any of this, (they are pretty close but his bro doesn't stay in the country) more like he is shielding everything and dying in silence.

He betrayed my love for him and I'm moving on fine, albeit, hard. I just don't want a situation whereby the whole thing is beyond mere eyes and he is weak, he is keeping to himself without talking out so his loved ones could take necessary actions.

I'm not even sure I want this to get to the front page, I only want honest and critical views
.
Lalasticlala, Pocohantas, cococandy, Dominique, ishilove etc

This guy is completely finished o.
I left an angel and fell into something worse than this 10 years ago.
We had 3 kids together before eyes clear me o.
Even the eye wey clear me Na because she and the mum wan poison me and failed.
I pray this guy comes out of this alive...

Report the spiritual matter to his parents and siblings before you move on. There are charms some women adorn which can capture a man's soul just by sight. Sleeping with the woman makes the matter worse.

If you ever loved the guy, speak to his people.

Your guy is just looking for a way to chance (dump) you.
The spiritual story are all made up lies.
His actions and silent behaviours are all acting.
No right thinking man will sleep with a girl "once" notice all is not well and still continue with her.
To paint a story of meeting a ghost is massive.
My dear if he's truly traumatised as he said he won't even contemplate to stay in that house alone neither day nor night.
If truly he saw a ghost and he thinks the girl is associated with it, by now he must have blocked her number not to talk of being reachable. Then you said "the girl called and he left the car to answer the call" my dear herein lies the answer to your problem.
.
.
.
.
There's something serious going on between them and it has been for long.
#myopinion

All I see is a well planned lie, deceit and betrayal.

God knows best nevertheless.
I wish you both the very best in your different lanes.

Airnigma:

We were friends even before we started dating and that's why I'm looking beyond the betrayal. But as it is now, my hands are tied. There's very little I can do to help other than to continue praying for him if he is really in a mess

That's good. Please continue to pray for him.

Meanwhile, stay strong yourself. Don't allow his action get to you much. As the street always say "bet wey go cut, go cut". Dust yourself up, and move on!

One secret and fact I'm going to share about guys is that

Men actually have a final decision or thought about settling down with any lady within the first 5hours you guys met..

Just 5hours and they know the results and hav already made the decision...

The next is to play a follow-up game ...
It's a pity the game can last for 4years until they pussy-oout with a tangible excuses...

Ladies?! You cannot detect or know his intentions towards you at the end...so you can only play along too and wish for the best or rather... You dicck-out as soon as it's clock a year relationship without any hope...

Goodluck

Ocholu:
Let me be real with you OP;

This matter strong like agbo and erujeje mixed together.

I believe beyond relationship, you guys are friends, and what does a friend do when his/her friend needs help? They don't abandon them.

Help him. In anyway you can. Do so, while making it clear that the relationship is over.

Shalom.

Are u kidding me right now?

Op kindly move on, they no born una together, he foolishly destroyed a beautiful relationship because of one Jezebel.

Since he didn't inform you by taking the girl home, getting her pregnant and the whole spiritual momo jumbo that happened after wards, you owe him no obligation of any kind.

babavik:
Your guy is just looking for a way to chance (dump) you.
The spiritual story are all made up lies.
His actions and silent behaviours are all acting.
No right thinking man will sleep with a girl "once" notice all is not well and still continue with her.
To paint a story of meeting a ghost is massive.
My dear if he's truly traumatised as he said he won't even contemplate to stay in that house alone neither day nor night.
If truly he saw a ghost and he thinks the girl is associated with it, by now he must have blocked her number not to talk of being reachable. Then you said "the girl called and he left the car to answer the call" my dear herein lies the answer to your problem.
.
.
.
.
There's something serious going on between them and it has been for long.
#myopinion

You literally took the words outa my mouth

#myopiniontoo

Stay off him completely,all those ghost fairy tales nah way of dumping ur sorry ass.. He and d girl av something serious ways back but u didn't notice.. Count ur loss and bounce