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What Can This Family Do? - Family - Nairaland

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What Can This Family Do? by Villa12: 5:09pm On Nov 28, 2021
Good day fellow Nairalanders

There's this neighbour of mine, a family with 6 kids (3 boys and 3 girls) and the couple, totalling eight. They lived in an uncompleted building (they couldn't afford getting a single room) though with the permission of the owner. I've known this family almost a decade. The children ain't going to school. Not even a public school. The children look so pale, malnourished and unkept. The husband is a bricklayer who hardly get job. Most of the job he had gotten in his lifetime was just a join man job. The wife goes to different places to wash clothes and get paid which isn't constant

Some of these children are becoming nuisance in the neighbourhood. They walk helmlessly in the street looking for what to eat. People took advantage of their predicament. Sending them errand at will, while their mates are in school. Their mother and father had been insulted severely for stopping them from turning their children to their messenger. These children doesn't listen to their parents to stop walking helmlessly, parabulating the street and being sent on an errand by anybody. They claimed their parents doesn't give them food to eat and they had to help people go on errand just to get something to eat. Even the church ain't helping. She had stopped attending her church. According to her, they mocked and make jest of her right in her presence. Why? Because of her condition, she wasn't contributing to the church. These children had become a street beggars. Infact, the first son (13 years old) was arrested last week for stealing a mobile phone. He confessed, claiming hunger led him to it. My dad had to plead on his behalf and he was released the following day having seen the phone

I'm from a humble background. There's little to nothing i could do to help this family. I teach in a secondary school with just 25k take home. I do talked to these children, tutor them, admonished and give them the little from me. My mother being a friend to their mother also help in giving foodstuffs (though occasionally). This family had been an eye sore to the public that i had to forget my own problem sometimes. According to the man, he claimed his wife had never disrespected him nor cheated on him for once. She was a good woman to him and his children. She was just unfortunate


This woman came to meet my mum yesterday, crying bitterly, hitting herself on the ground. She claimed her family had been for days without food (eating only unripe pawpaw) This was someone who had ulcer as a result of starvation. She cried prufesly, lamenting seriously, claiming she'd have to abandon her children and run away. Her tears moved me and i got teary. My mum scolded her, letting her know the implications. Also, that should be the last thing to ever do. Not that she herself (my mum) was enjoying in her matrimonial home. However, running away, abandoning her children is a pure suicide mission that she'd regret for the rest of her life

My worry was that, these children needed to go back to school. These children are even brilliant seriously. The first 2 boys are done with primary school, while the 3rd child a girl, supposed to be in basic 6, sitting for her common entrance exam

Is there any Agency/NGO or whataview that can help these children back to school? not minding public school? These children are more likely to end up badly if they keep roaming the streets while their mates are in school. They'd easily get exposed to all sorts of bad things including the girls amongst them. Sadly, the last 3 children hadn't been to school before. Yet, the last child is 4 years old.

Life was completely unfair to this family. They lacked the basic necessities of life. Moreso, these children doesn't deserve all these, as they are way too young for this. In a saner climes, i doubt if these children would be abandoned. Where can they go to? Who should they meet? These children mustn't end up on the street

Looking forward to your suggestions. Thanks!

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Re: What Can This Family Do? by anthonyuncle(m): 5:23pm On Nov 28, 2021
men, this is touching.

look for any Catholic church around you, ask for st Vincent de Paul society, and introduce the family to them

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: What Can This Family Do? by Kobojunkie: 5:39pm On Nov 28, 2021
Villa12:
Life was completely unfair to this family. They lacked the basic necessities of life. Moreso, these children doesn't deserve all these, as they are way too young for this. In a saner climes, i doubt if these children would be abandoned. Where can they go to? Who should they meet? These children mustn't end up on the street

Looking forward to your suggestions. Thanks!
How exactly is life to blame for a poor couple amassing 6 kids in a span of 9 years? Seems more like foolishness and greed is what happened to them. undecided

You may need to contact orphanages, or catholic programs around as well in case they can come take some of the kids off the hands of the parents abeg. undecided

18 Likes 4 Shares

Re: What Can This Family Do? by VTJN(m): 5:42pm On Nov 28, 2021
This is really touching.

2 Likes

Re: What Can This Family Do? by Spherical77(m): 5:58pm On Nov 28, 2021
Omo this is disheartening. Not even this period man!

I can't even imagine what that family is going through. May God turn their story to glory

2 Likes

Re: What Can This Family Do? by Spherical77(m): 6:03pm On Nov 28, 2021
Kobojunkie:
How exactly is life to blame for a poor couple amassing 6 kids? Seems more like foolishness and greed is what happened to them. undecided

You may need to contact orphanages, or catholic programs around as well in case they can come take some of the kids off the hands of the parents abeg. undecided
The parents are more likely to be illiterate or semi-illiterate. Average Nigerians had more kids than those doing pretty fine. They aren't greedy per se

1 Like

Re: What Can This Family Do? by NigeriaIsGreat: 6:07pm On Nov 28, 2021
That family needs rehabs

Those children should be sent back to school to avoid them turning bad and worse than their parents

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: What Can This Family Do? by Kobojunkie: 6:12pm On Nov 28, 2021
Spherical77:
The parents are more likely to be illiterate or semi-illiterate. Average Nigerians had more kids than those doing pretty fine. They aren't greedy per se
Illiteracy does not predispose men or women to making foolish choices. This is an issue of foolishness and greed , an issue that torments many in Nigeria irrespective of educational background. undecided

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Re: What Can This Family Do? by yomi007k(m): 6:22pm On Nov 28, 2021
Kobojunkie:
How exactly is life to blame for a poor couple amassing 6 kids? Seems more like foolishness and greed is what happened to them. undecided

You may need to contact orphanages, or catholic programs around as well in case they can come take some of the kids off the hands of the parents abeg. undecided

These are the issues.

I tell people that once you have 2 kids you need to do family meeting and discuss way forward,family planning as well as income/expenditure. This is because 3 kids is difficult to manage for majority in present day Nigeria.

Nigerians shy away from this topic of "number of kids". I see people that do this as not enlightened ,irresponsible and lazy.

Gone are the days of large numbers of children. If we want to develop , we should do what developed countries are doing.

As per solution, I think looking for orphanages and NGOs is all you can do.

I wish them goodluck.

5 Likes

Re: What Can This Family Do? by SportsHD: 6:35pm On Nov 28, 2021
They should've opted for family planning in the first place. Stupid parents, bringing kids to this life to suffer. The one that was caught stealing; that's a slippery slope. I hope he doesn't degenerate into something bigger.

The parents are to be blamed for this, fuvck!
I'm pained as I'm typing. And, this is the situation of millions of nigerians. Fuvcking poor couples with 6, 5 kids in this economy.

I don't have any solution to their Matter as I'm angry and just here to rant and blame the parents. I just wish the kids turn out well.

Which state are you though? I just hope it's not those states that's cultists reign there. Because, small time now, them go cut the boys.

6 Likes

Re: What Can This Family Do? by Spherical77(m): 6:44pm On Nov 28, 2021
SportsHD:
They should've opted for family planning in the first place. Stupid parents, bringing kids to this life to suffer. The one that was caught stealing; that's a slippery slope. I hope he doesn't degenerate into something bigger.

The parents are to be blamed for this, fuvck!
I'm pained as I'm typing. And, this is the situation of millions of nigerians. Fuvcking poor couples with 6, 5 kids in this economy.

I don't have any solution to their Matter as I'm angry and just here to rant and blame the parents. I just wish the kids turn out well.

Which state are you though? I just hope it's not those states that's cultists reign there. Because, small time now, them go cut the boys.
Seriously that's the problem at bolded. Hungry children with no education. If something is not done now, it will be disastrous later

The deed had been done already. You know they can't kill the children nor unbirth them smiley
Re: What Can This Family Do? by Nobody: 6:49pm On Nov 28, 2021
SMH..

It's high time Nigerian govt adopt the one child policy like China.

How can you know you can't fend for yourself and still go ahead to birth such large number of children you can't cater for?

These are the kind of things that cause increase in crime rate cos those children will start moving with bad gangs who will train them in a bad way and before you know it, they'll start terrorizing the community.

That was how I was advising one chicken brain those days to go for family planning after the 4th child. She ignored me. Went for the fifth. When she went for the sixth, she had twins. They are seven now.

The children are a big nuisance in the neighborhood. They steal her money every now and then and claim it's because they were hungry. The frolick around every uncle in the neighborhood.

I've since cut off from her because I don't like associating with chicken brains. Someone who doesn't listen to advice.

9 Likes

Re: What Can This Family Do? by sisisioge: 6:51pm On Nov 28, 2021
Life wasnt unfair to them....they were unfair to themselves! Poor people with 6 children! Gosh! Imagine the fockery! In this present Nigeria!

Well, there are no agencies set up to help clean manmade masses like the one you described. They are on their own.

The best she can do is to go and fix the boys above 10yrs old in an apprenticeship where she is sure they wont maltreat them. Very silly people! Whew....I'm sorry, family planning has been free in health centres since I was a child biko. This is their problem...they shouldnt expect the community to solve it for them. Imagine! Why wont church members mock them.....I'm sure their pastor does not have 6 children he could not afford. Silly!

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Re: What Can This Family Do? by sisisioge: 6:53pm On Nov 28, 2021
Mercychen:
SMH..

It's high time Nigerian govt adopt the one child policy like China.

How can you know you can't fend for yourself and still go ahead to birth such large number of children you can't cater for?

These are the kind of things that cause increase in crime rate cos those children will start moving with bad gangs who will train them in a bad way and before you know it, they'll start terrorizing the community.

That was how I was advising one chicken brain those days to go for family planning after the 4th child. She ignored me. Went for the fifth. When she went for the sixth, she had twins. They are seven now.

The children are a big nuisance in the neighborhood. They steal her money every now and then and claim it's because they were hungry. The frolick around every uncle in the neighborhood.

I've since cut off from her because I don't like associating with chicken brains. Someone who doesn't listen to advice.




Good thing you did....I find them seriously annoying! Hian! 7 kids in this era!

1 Like

Re: What Can This Family Do? by SportsHD: 6:57pm On Nov 28, 2021
Spherical77:
Seriously that's the problem at bolded. Hungry children with no education. If something is not done now, it will be disastrous later

The deed had been done already. You know they can't kill the children nor unbirth them smiley

When I was still at Abuja. There's was this couple living out of a missionary in my estate. The missionary gave them a place to stay. Not permanent though, but somewhere to lay their head. Now, I know businesses can go wrong and how the economic situation in Nigeria can bankrupt someone. But, the couples went and had two more kids, for bleeps sakes. Like they had the third kid in the missionary, In a poor, hand to mouth situation, they had the Fourth one again. I just don't understand. Family planning is free, condom is not that expensive. But no, they keep bringing kids to this life to suffer!


The mother and the last born sleeps on a makeshift bed while the other three daughters and the father slept on the cold bare floor. The woman has a make shift shop in front of the missionary. Husband is jobless. One day, I went to purchase something from them. I usually buy something from them because, I just buy from them from time to time because, I kinda pity them. There's this man that comes to buy from them also. I overheard him asking the oldest girl if she had a boyfriend. If she was still a virgin. The girl would be around 13 years old. If the girls gets raped now, I hope she doesn't, the rapist can offer the parents money to forget the matter. So and so, we keep on breeding fuvcked up individuals, they end up being prostitutes, ritualists, skull harvesters, kidnappers and all manner of things just to survive. Tragic, It's just tragic.

8 Likes 1 Share

Re: What Can This Family Do? by sisisioge: 7:03pm On Nov 28, 2021
SportsHD:

When I was still at Abuja. There's was this couple living out of a missionary in my estate. The missionary gave them a place to stay. Not permanent though, but somewhere to lay their head. Now, I know businesses can go wrong and how the economic situation in Nigeria can bankrupt someone. But, the couples went and had two more kids, for bleeps sakes. Like they had the third kid in the missionary, In a poor, hand to mouth situation, they had the Fourth one again. I just don't understand. Family planning is free, condom is not that expensive. But no, they keep bringing kids to this life to suffer!


The mother and the last born sleeps on a makeshift bed while the other three daughters and the father slept on the cold bare floor. The woman has a make shift shop in front of the missionary. Husband is jobless. One day, I went to purchase something from them. I usually buy something from them because, I just buy from them from time to time because, I kinda pity them. There's this man that comes to buy from them also. I overheard him asking the oldest girl if she had a boyfriend. If she was still a virgin. The girl would be around 13 years old. If the girls gets raped now, I hope she doesn't, the rapist can offer the parents money to forget the matter. So and so, we keep on breeding fuvcked up individuals, they end up being prostitutes, ritualists, skull harvesters, kidnappers and all manner of things just to survive. Tragic, It's just tragic.

My brother,it gets overwhelmingly tiring for me. That's how one squatting in her brother inlaws' house kept birthing kids like a rat while her inlaws struggled with infertility. Upon that,she was still picking fight with her benefactor. At last, na chase them chase them out and she had the audacity to wail. Hian! Life could be easy if we at least cut our coats according to our materials fa. Whew!

6 Likes

Re: What Can This Family Do? by Trios(f): 7:11pm On Nov 28, 2021
The truth remaina that, the poor will always breed more than they can cater for.. Sex is the only entertainment they enjoy.. Ratger than judge their already pitiable condition. Pls if you can help... Pls do so for GOD sake.. No one knows the fate of these kids... They could be brainy kids.. Please help if you can

1 Like 1 Share

Re: What Can This Family Do? by Kobojunkie: 7:16pm On Nov 28, 2021
Villa12:
I discovered the parents are illiterate and perhaps ignorance of family planning. It was my mum who educate her on the need for family planning and she was saying she had been told about it before but she doesn't have money for it. She was taken to the hospital and the needful was done
No be Illiteracy do them na ignorance and greed. Our forefathers and mothers before us had ways of preventing pregnancies - even abortion methods, so don't let anyone deceive you into believing such nonsense of those illiterate. undecided

In fact, you insult illiterate people by believing such jargon. undecided
Re: What Can This Family Do? by Kobojunkie: 7:20pm On Nov 28, 2021
Trios:
The truth remaina that, the poor will always breed more than they can cater for.. Sex is the only entertainment they enjoy.. Ratger than judge their already pitiable condition. Pls if you can help... Pls do so for GOD sake.. No one knows the fate of these kids... They could be brainy kids.. Please help if you can
That is not true of poor folks. There are the wise even among the poor people. Not all poor folks breed like rats abeg, make we no insult them. undecided
Re: What Can This Family Do? by VTJN(m): 7:29pm On Nov 28, 2021
Kobojunkie:
No be Illiteracy do them na ignorance and greed. Our forefathers and mothers before us had ways of preventing pregnancies - even abortion methods, so don't let anyone deceive you into believing such nonsense of those illiterate. undecided

In fact, you insult illiterate people by believing such jargon. undecided
I've seen where a man was saying he would have 7kids simply because his parents had 7. He was even indirectly insulting his neighbour who had just 2 kids

The difference was that the former was illiterate while the later had formal education

Mind you, you could check the factors responsible for the high population growth in Nigeria. I kid you not, illiteracy was among

Illiteracy is a very big disease man. Sorry to say this, illiteracy was one of the major problem up north (Nigeria)

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Re: What Can This Family Do? by Kobojunkie: 7:36pm On Nov 28, 2021
VTJN:
1. I've seen where a man was saying he would have 7kids simply because his parents had 7. He was even indirectly insulting his neighbour who had just 2 kids

The difference was that the former was illiterate while the later had formal education

2. Mind you, you could check the factors responsible for the high population growth in Nigeria. I kid you not, illiteracy was among

3. Illiteracy is a very big disease man. Sorry to say this, illiteracy was one of the major problem up north (Nigeria)
1. The man who had 7 because his parents had 7 is a fool. And you might be shocked to know this but there are plenty educated people out there who think like that fool. undecided

2. We call it illiterate because we want to sound politically correct. However, in Nigeria, it isn't just the illiterate that have more children than they can afford. Even the educated do this enmasse. Come here to America and you will see them too. undecided

3. But in the same North, you will find that both the illiterate and none breed in similar way. There are many out there with college degrees who maybe have more than 1 wife and more than a dozen kids too. It is not just the illiterate doing this but instead the foolish. undecided

2 Likes

Re: What Can This Family Do? by NigeriaIsGreat: 7:46pm On Nov 28, 2021
Trios:
The truth remaina that, the poor will always breed more than they can cater for.. Sex is the only entertainment they enjoy.. Ratger than judge their already pitiable condition. Pls if you can help... Pls do so for GOD sake.. No one knows the fate of these kids... They could be brainy kids.. Please help if you can
Yes the family needs help. Condemning them wouldn't solve anything. Instead, helping them inorder to avoid those innocent children joining bad gang involving in crime

2 Likes

Re: What Can This Family Do? by Nobody: 8:06pm On Nov 28, 2021
sisisioge:


Good thing you did....I find them seriously annoying! Hian! 7 kids in this era!

Hm, my dear. Annoying abi annoying?
Re: What Can This Family Do? by Spherical77(m): 8:12pm On Nov 28, 2021
SportsHD:

When I was still at Abuja. There's was this couple living out of a missionary in my estate. The missionary gave them a place to stay. Not permanent though, but somewhere to lay their head. Now, I know businesses can go wrong and how the economic situation in Nigeria can bankrupt someone. But, the couples went and had two more kids, for bleeps sakes. Like they had the third kid in the missionary, In a poor, hand to mouth situation, they had the Fourth one again. I just don't understand. Family planning is free, condom is not that expensive. But no, they keep bringing kids to this life to suffer!


The mother and the last born sleeps on a makeshift bed while the other three daughters and the father slept on the cold bare floor. The woman has a make shift shop in front of the missionary. Husband is jobless. One day, I went to purchase something from them. I usually buy something from them because, I just buy from them from time to time because, I kinda pity them. There's this man that comes to buy from them also. I overheard him asking the oldest girl if she had a boyfriend. If she was still a virgin. The girl would be around 13 years old. If the girls gets raped now, I hope she doesn't, the rapist can offer the parents money to forget the matter. So and so, we keep on breeding fuvcked up individuals, they end up being prostitutes, ritualists, skull harvesters, kidnappers and all manner of things just to survive. Tragic, It's just tragic.
No doubt those stupid boys often take advantage of these female children from extremely poor background. Some even get rape without doing nothing. The parents no try at all. Having more kids in such horrible condition

Their parents are to be blamed not the children. Public enlightenment on the need to stop seeing children as achievement and something to always brag about

This family shared by Op is really touching. They needed to be assisted to avoid doom smiley

Those children won't end well if something drastic is not done.

3 Likes

Re: What Can This Family Do? by DontBullshitMe: 8:27pm On Nov 28, 2021
Mercychen:
SMH..

It's high time Nigerian govt adopt the one child policy like China.

How can you know you can't fend for yourself and still go ahead to birth such large number of children you can't cater for?

These are the kind of things that cause increase in crime rate cos those children will start moving with bad gangs who will train them in a bad way and before you know it, they'll start terrorizing the community.

That was how I was advising one chicken brain those days to go for family planning after the 4th child. She ignored me. Went for the fifth. When she went for the sixth, she had twins. They are seven now.

The children are a big nuisance in the neighborhood. They steal her money every now and then and claim it's because they were hungry. The frolick around every uncle in the neighborhood.

I've since cut off from her because I don't like associating with chicken brains. Someone who doesn't listen to advice.
Nigeria is a democracy. China is an autocracy.

Unrealistic suggestion.
Re: What Can This Family Do? by Nobody: 8:32pm On Nov 28, 2021
Villa12:
I discovered the parents are illiterate and perhaps ignorance of family planning. It was my mum who educate her on the need for family planning and she was saying she had been told about it before but she doesn't have money for it. She was taken to the hospital and the needful was done

Yeah, you're right. It's common among the illiterates.. and even when you try to advise them, they won't listen.

This one deliberately didn't want to get a family planning done because she keeps saying her husband built a big house in the village. Who will occupy it. So when she had the twin boys, the doctors immediately fixed one for her without her consent because theyve been telling her to do it since. The husband too told the doctors to do it immediately they brought out the babies ( she had them through CS) cos he was tired.

Iliteracy is a disease.

5 Likes

Re: What Can This Family Do? by Nobody: 8:35pm On Nov 28, 2021
DontBullshitMe:

Nigeria is a democracy. China is an autocracy.

Unrealistic suggestion.
.

How is it unrealistic?

If I become the president today, it will become realistic by force.

3 Likes

Re: What Can This Family Do? by Ulunne777(f): 8:37pm On Nov 28, 2021
The truth is that this situation is everywhere.We all have ppl around us going through same.It becomes harder when the ppl have multiple kids while you the helper have 2 max.like you are stupid.

5 Likes

Re: What Can This Family Do? by DontBullshitMe: 8:42pm On Nov 28, 2021
Mercychen:
.

How is it unrealistic?

If I become the president today, it will become realistic by force.
Stop being deliberately ignorant. China's one child policy can never be replicated in Nigeria because Nigeria is a democracy.

Simple as ABC.

That can happen in countries such as China, Saudi Arabia etc.
Re: What Can This Family Do? by Nobody: 8:49pm On Nov 28, 2021
DontBullshitMe:

Stop being deliberately ignorant. China's one child policy can never be replicated in Nigeria because Nigeria is a democracy.

Simple as ABC.

That can happen in countries such as China, Saudi Arabia etc.

Democracy my foot!

Where and in what ways has it been evident?

Story!

2 Likes

Re: What Can This Family Do? by Kobojunkie: 8:58pm On Nov 28, 2021
Ulunne777:
The truth is that this situation is everywhere.We all have ppl around us going through same.It becomes harder when the ppl have multiple kids while you the helper have 2 max. Like you are stupid.
Nigerian society is still one where the wise are considered foolish because the foolish are the majority. undecided

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