iamyemiakins:

I no think say this one dey Nigeria

Oh, I was raised like that by my own parents in that same Nigeria, so don't bother trying to turn this into some sort of "us vs them" issue abeg!

Ishilove:

Yes, a woman whose posts are often very strange

Lol... Tpia was Tpia.

artimisfowler:
So, a distant relative of mine was brought from the village to come live in my house, about 17, 18 or so, ever since she came I have been noticing some things.

Some street boys who have never greeted me before have started to greet me even from far, they offer their unsolicited help, like directing traffic on the street when I’m driving out. A particular boy stares at me like he can’t wait for me to go out every morning.

When I first noticed the connection was one evening I came home a little earlier, parked outside and was rushing to get some documents, I ran into her with some neighbour’s son in my staircase standing in front of each other, later that evening after I gave her a dirty slap in five sec. she narrated that the boy came upstairs to inform us that he had returned our wheel barrow but no one was at home and on his way out they bumped into each other in the fairly dark staircase while she was returning from the market, I knew she was lying because this a girl that wouldn’t confess to guilt even at gun point, she has a 1st class in lying but that’s story for another day. And yea every chance she gets she also dishing out too much of my food for male visitors particularly and serve them drinks I chilled for myself, lastly she is in the habit of wearing tight fitting clothes. I seized her trousers and shorts, in fact I don’t allow that in my house, but she will cut her long skirts into mini skirts and also cut the sides and lie about doing that.

To cut the story short, I just don’t understand what these guys see in her, she’s not a very attractive girl, though she may have kind of oversized backside for her age and narrow hips, but that’s rubbish, she’s just a little girl and I still have memories of her when she’d weewee on herself and cry with running nose whenever we traveled to the village in Christmas, it all seems like yesterday, I guess she is all grown now and it sickens me to imagine her doing the unimaginable in my house.

Sincerely, I don’t know what to do, wether to send her back to the villa, she can work alright, she’s very protective of my family and properties too, she knows everything happening in the neighbourhood and has made me understand things I didn’t understand before in the neighbourhood, tells us the latest dramas, who’s not talking to who and why, all kinds of gossips, once in my presence she even told dss officers jaw dropping lies and discharged them when they came because electricity was illegally tapped from high tension and we got petitioned. But, in all these “good outlook” or advantages of having her, the look in her eyes make us unsettled, who knows what she can be capable of or turn out to be tomorrow, how she commands men’s attention can bring insecurity to my home, her influence is just uncomfortable, I don’t know if anyone can relate but I need some suggestion, family people only!

You said to cut the long story short and still went to write two paragraphs. That's not fair.

"What did they see in her, someone that is not atteactive", that is too low of you, what she is doing is wrong and at the same time is expected of her, slapping her is not the way to go, just send her back to her people because you lack the emotional intelligence as to how to handle such case especially with you expecting her to still be the baby you used to know like she won't grow.

Your pikin sef go dey that age range one day, and besides you were once a teenager or in your youthful days you never experienced such?

She’s very smart and probably smarter than you guys. For her to know everything happening in the area and also discard Dss.

To cut the story short, I just don’t understand what these guys see in her, she’s not a very attractive girl, though she may have kind of oversized backside for her age and narrow hips...

...she can work alright, she’s very protective of my family and properties too, she knows everything happening in the neighbourhood and has made me understand things I didn’t understand before in the neighbourhood, tells us the latest dramas, who’s not talking to who and why, all kinds of gossips, once in my presence she even told dss officers jaw dropping lies and discharged them when they came because electricity was illegally tapped from high tension and we got petitioned. But, in all these “good outlook” or advantages of having her, the look in her eyes make us unsettled, who knows what she can be capable of or turn out to be tomorrow, how she commands men’s attention can bring insecurity to my home, her influence is just uncomfortable

Verryy fascinating bits. Na these parts concern me. They are interesting to me, lol - if they are actually true, and simply not the OP's perception.

Great advice, by the way, Acidosis. I completely agree with you. The lady isn't necessarily a bad person or a future candidate for failure, single motherhood, prostitution and whatnot like some alarmist and judgemental comments here are making her seem.

She simply needs GUIDANCE and ADVICE and watching over. Not the restrictive kind that'll push her further down a wrong way and definitely she doesn't need to be left alone, to end up the way she'll end up.

The OP should just establish a connection and relationship with her, be a mentor sort of. The girl is already open to you. I don't see any big deal here. Ask her questions. Converse with her. Know what she'll like to do or wants to be in the future, any goals... and gently motivate her in that part.

And like someone up there said, it's NORMAL. Teenagers will like each other and will get attracted to each other, and some will even feel the need to go all out exploring. What'll make the difference is in how you handle it as a guardian. Whether it is your influence that'll hold sway over her or that of her peers, that might eventually push her down a wrong path.

And I think you should apologise to her for slapping her, and then change the way you interact with her completely.

If she shows no sign of heeding to your guidance after all these, and obstinately want to continue in the way she deem fit, then you can let her go, send her back.

Magnoliaa


Great input ^

artimisfowler:

Be catching cruise with someone’s cousin e fit be yours tomorrow and hope sey you go post her photo and address?

My cousin go dey do house help for my house? Guy.. e no fit happen to me..

The guy even called her house help...

artimisfowler:
So, a distant relative of mine was brought from the village to come live in my house, about 17, 18 or so, ever since she came I have been noticing some things.

Some street boys who have never greeted me before have started to greet me even from far, they offer their unsolicited help, like directing traffic on the street when I’m driving out. A particular boy stares at me like he can’t wait for me to go out every morning.

When I first noticed the connection was one evening I came home a little earlier, parked outside and was rushing to get some documents, I ran into her with some neighbour’s son in my staircase standing in front of each other, later that evening after I gave her a dirty slap in five sec. she narrated that the boy came upstairs to inform us that he had returned our wheel barrow but no one was at home and on his way out they bumped into each other in the fairly dark staircase while she was returning from the market, I knew she was lying because this a girl that wouldn’t confess to guilt even at gun point, she has a 1st class in lying but that’s story for another day. And yea every chance she gets she also dishing out too much of my food for male visitors particularly and serve them drinks I chilled for myself, lastly she is in the habit of wearing tight fitting clothes. I seized her trousers and shorts, in fact I don’t allow that in my house, but she will cut her long skirts into mini skirts and also cut the sides and lie about doing that.

To cut the story short, I just don’t understand what these guys see in her, she’s not a very attractive girl, though she may have kind of oversized backside for her age and narrow hips, but that’s rubbish, she’s just a little girl and I still have memories of her when she’d weewee on herself and cry with running nose whenever we traveled to the village in Christmas, it all seems like yesterday, I guess she is all grown now and it sickens me to imagine her doing the unimaginable in my house.

Sincerely, I don’t know what to do, wether to send her back to the villa, she can work alright, she’s very protective of my family and properties too, she knows everything happening in the neighbourhood and has made me understand things I didn’t understand before in the neighbourhood, tells us the latest dramas, who’s not talking to who and why, all kinds of gossips, once in my presence she even told dss officers jaw dropping lies and discharged them when they came because electricity was illegally tapped from high tension and we got petitioned. But, in all these “good outlook” or advantages of having her, the look in her eyes make us unsettled, who knows what she can be capable of or turn out to be tomorrow, how she commands men’s attention can bring insecurity to my home, her influence is just uncomfortable, I don’t know if anyone can relate but I need some suggestion, family people only!

By the time she starts commanding your husband, body go tell you.


Men don't need a fine face to get down with a girl. Whenever testosterone comes calling, all manner of sense flies out the window.





Send her back home immediately.


If your husband objects, you should know you're in big trouble.


Who advised you to bring fresh girl to your house in the first place? It's like bringing meat to a cat. Sophistication or not, she's attractive and that's trouble for you if you don't return her ASAP.

Acidosis:

Magnolia

Great input ^

Haha. I literally screenshotted your own comment.

The last paragraph was really so insightful I feel it is something I have to go back to digesting all over again.

advanceDNA:


My cousin go dey do house help for my house? Guy.. e no fit happen to me..

The guy even called her house help...

And house help is a fowl language in your village abi? Nigerian mentality has made us lose the intended meaning of words, we twist everything.

I think breaking sentences apart will help eg. House = domestic, help = assist/assistant. So you can’t assist your spouse domestically? Or help your parents around the house? Anyone can be a house helper especially when it’s not their legal home. Next time make distinctions btw helper and maid, servant or slave, choice of words make a difference. You need to grow up.

Magnoliaa:


Verryy fascinating bits. Na these parts concern me. They are interesting to me, lol - if they are actually true, and simply not the OP's perception.

artimisfowler:


And house help is a fowl language in your village abi? Nigerian mentality has made us lose the intended meaning of words, we twist everything.

I think breaking sentences apart will help eg. House = domestic, help = assist/assistant. So you can’t assist your spouse domestically? Or help your parents around the house? Anyone can be a house helper especially when it’s not their legal home. Next time make distinctions btw helper and maid, servant or slave, choice of words make a difference.

U grammar too mush..
If she was that much of a cousin in your heart, you would give her the cousin tag...u called her a house help in the title of your thread..

. and u kept mentioning my house, my house, my house, like she was not family, like she was an outsider....in case you don’t know ur tone of narration sent an “house-girl message” to we the readers..

You are clearly in need of her, I know how easily attached one can get with a house helper, especially when they can give gist for Africa . As a woman , sit her down and explain to her what your noticing , the consequences of her actions and how it will bring her disgrace and send her back to the village .(its always hard to listen at that age ,teen girls feel on top of the world when giving much attention by men

Magnoliaa:




Verryy fascinating bits. Na these parts concern me. They are interesting to me, lol - if they are actually true, and simply not the OP's perception.

If you didn’t think they weren’t true, why would you bother writing us so long a letter?

Magnoliaa:

I don't see any big deal here.

No one said there was a big deal here, there doesn’t have to be a big deal before I sample opinions on NL my dear.

I also noticed you highlighted someone’s comment about her being smarter than we are without understanding the context of what I meant, I think many on NL are just dumb and immature.

artimisfowler:
If you didn’t think they weren’t true, why would you bother writing us so long a letter? “not simply the OP’s perception” what does that even mean?

No one said there was a big deal here, there doesn’t have to be a big deal before I sample opinions on NL my dear.

I also noticed you highlighted someone’s comment about her being smarter than we are without understanding the context of what I meant, I think most of you guys here are dumb and immature.

Why the fùck are you being defensive and convulsing all over the thread? ''Writing US so long a letter?'' On whose behalf are you speaking? You get beef with me?

Ogbeni, gerrout with you and your (likely fake) stories and insecurities. Shey you've gotten a response from me now after modifying your erstwhile asinine insinuation and mentioning me TWICE, saying the same thing.

Mtcheeewww.

Magnoliaa:


Why the fùck are you being defensive and convulsing all over the thread? ''Writing US so long a letter?'' On whose behalf are you speaking? You get beef with me?

Ogbeni, gerrout with you and your (likely fake) stories and insecurities. Shey you've gotten a response from me now after modifying your erstwhile asinine insinuation and mentioning me TWICE, saying the same the same thing.

Mtcheeewww.

I can mention you as much as I want, lekwa ndi fúck.

kobo and magno always beat me to it. smh! una no dey sleep?

it still wont surprise me if the OP himself no ho be the one to first knack "village aunty"

kkins25:
kobo and magno always beat me to it. smh! una no dey sleep?

Who is 'magno?' And beat you to what? What are you still doing awake yourself?

kkins25:
it still wont surprise me if the OP himself no ho be the one to first knack "village aunty"

You sound like a demented pervert, look for one of your village aunty to “knack” sick boy. This my “village aunty” go even expose pass you.

artimisfowler:

You sound like a demented pervert, look for one of your village aunty to “knack” sick boy. This my “village aunty” go even expose pass you.

I am a pervert alright. Sexual abuse factually begins from the victims closest relatives like yourself who has already observed her sexual features.
One day, your "Jerome" shall rise when it senses her presence. hopefully, you'd be sensible enough to do the right thing. i. e knack. lol!!!

Magnoliaa:


Who is 'magno?' And beat you to what? What are you still doing awake yourself?

how can i sleep when you're out there on some adventure

kkins25:
I am a pervert alright. Sexual abuse factually begins from the victims closest relatives like yourself who has already observed her sexual features.
One day, your "Jerome" shall rise when it senses her presence. hopefully, you'd be sensible enough to do the right thing. i. e knack. lol!!!

Do you even know if I am male or female and what makes you think everyone is sick like you, you already know how you started.

That's why people go for elderly house helps, if you are not ready for drama, then never employ a teen. As long as you employ a teen there will always be drama. According to you she does her chores, so she has some positive sides, but her telling of lies/craftiness is a big NO for me. So talk to her, and monitor her for the next 3-6months, if there is no improvement, then you send her back home. Bear in mind, that the moment you had taken her from the village, you must have raised her parents hopes towards giving their daughter a better future. SO IT WOULD NOT BE GOOD TO SEND HER BACK EMPTY HANDED. If possible give some financial help or establish her, by paying for her to learn a trade, that way, she/her family will feel less devastated when she is returned.

Las las she go elope I know her type..

artimisfowler:


May your life be cut short!
Do you even know if I am male or female and what makes you think everyone is sick like you, you already know how you started. I wish I can identify you in real life if I don’t lock you up for some months God knows, if you want to try me drop your address and photo or dm me. Idiot

Never did i know, that i shall find an even greater idiot.
instead of praying for my life to cut short, channel that energy into transforming your energy into something we all can be proud of. huh!
you want to lock up the eye witness abi? you want to keep the puna for yourself abi?
lock up all the boys in your area na, uncle-aunty.

The sexual threats to your cousin are; yourself, and neighbours- But you first. lol!! no be me talk am oh its just statistics.

considering where you reside and where i do, technically speaking- my life span on average is longer as compared to yours.
pray first for longer life before asking God to do my job.

The face of a deluded pervert

artimisfowler:

Hehehehe you’re obviously a little boy as I imagined. Can a weak boy like you possibly drop your address here?
After eating your mother’s food you woke up at this ungodly hour to do keyboard battle abi.. my curse on you still stands if you don’t drop that your address or phone number, may your life be cut short!
The people that will pick you up won’t hurt you oo but you’ll be brought here in Abuja, even your parents will beg till they exhaust their strengths, they won’t even recognize you by the time you’ll come out. You’ll think you’re playing with your mate until it dawns on you, as you’re typing with that your small phone now you think you’re safe? E go shock you! Continue!

I won’t spare you anymore words but I’ve noted you and unless you delete this account, I promise you that one day you’ll stand before me, it doesn’t matter how long it’ll take.

See as you even look like a HIV patient, I’ll find you

bleh! bleh!! bleh!!! you took from my Nairaland profile which i put there, and you're feeling like one hacker. You be olodo, real olodo..
just go ahead nd do what you intend to do with your cousin abi na house help.

you nd i both know why you see her more as house help than as cousin.. no be konji? for here?

cayorday89:
"What did they see in her, someone that is not atteactive", that is too low of you, you lack the emotional intelligence as to how to handle such case especially with you expecting her to still be the baby you used to know like she won't grow.

You talk too much, and you’re clueless, your type is usually empty in real life.

artimisfowler:
I pray you pass through half of I’ve seen and may your daughter (or a relative whose only parent entrusted to you before passing away) bring the opposite sex to your home and probably fornicate with them while little kids cry in the next room, steal your money/food and give to them and if you ever raise your hand to reprimand him or her even for once, I hope that that your hands hangs in the air.

Again, if you can't handle this young gal... send her back to her parents so they can look after their daughter abeg!

Kobojunkie or whatever your name, you’re obviously a child, shut your mouth. Wetin person no know pass am. Jobless boy

Kobojunkie:
Again, if you can't handle this young gal... send her back to her parents so they can look after their daughter abeg!

Kobojunkie or whatever your name, you’re obviously a child, shut your mouth. Wetin person no know pass am. Jobless boy