Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New
Stats: 3,143,480 members, 7,781,416 topics. Date: Friday, 29 March 2024 at 02:06 PM

I'm At Crossroads! ( Updated) - Romance - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / I'm At Crossroads! ( Updated) (2133 Views)

Am I Being Unlucky Or I'm At Fault / My Experience With A Bitch In Lagos(rate Me If I'm At Fault) / Advise Someone At Crossroads (2) (3) (4)

(1) (2) (Reply) (Go Down)

I'm At Crossroads! ( Updated) by Herbephe1(m): 1:45pm On Jan 29, 2022
Good morning elders!
It's really been a while I sought your wisdom,but today I'm doing so
My One-half year relationship is cracking!
I met this girl almost a couple of years ago at a friend's party, I met her mom weeks after the beginning of our relationship,as her mom insisted that she needed to know my family background before she could give us a-go-ahead in building the relationship. After all her consultations and investigations,she finally succumbed,and it'd been a bed of roses until recently when she travelled to hustle for her fashion designing graduation.

Not to keep you elders waiting, my fiancee who went to Ogun state in search for money to fund her graduation ceremony, returned on the eve of the new year. I paid her a visit the second day, and we discussed how much she was able to gather,in the middle of our discussion she told me that a guy(an apprentice) gave her 15k and his brother also gave her 3k. I paused for a while, thinking how possible it's for a struggling guy(apprentice) to give out 15k to a girl he just met less than a month. It's late already so I told her to her to visit me the following day for better discussion.
She visited me the following day,and through out the time we spent together,the guy was calling her repeatedly, after a while his brother joined the call 🤔. I was not at peace so I instructed her to switched off the phone.

Fortunately I noticed a ring on her finger and asked who gave her the ring,she told me the guy did. I asked her what did collecting the ring from him mean. She told me the guy proposed to her but rejected though she collected the ring from her just for friendship. I asked her if she understood what such ring signify and she said she did,that it signifies love. That she only collected the ring since she would not be going back again and there won't be chance of seeing the guy again. Though i have no qualms for collecting the ring, but putting it on her finger and wearing it to my house made me furious. after much argument, I maintained my calmness.
Then we found ourselves in romance play, there comes another bomb. She paused and told me she had a confession to make. I recomposed to hear the latest, after much waiting I came up with a statement" did that guy slept with you? How many times?? She responded with with yes that it's only two times. I put on a smiling face and gave her the affirmation that as far as she won't repeat such, that I have problem with that. Men are bound to making mistakes,I said this so that she won't change the narrative though she did. She stared at me for few seconds and said she's just trying to see my reaction that nothing of such happened though he collected the ring from him. Since then my feelings for her has started dropping.
The Crux of the matter is that, she'd be doing her freedom ceremony on Monday,though I'm a student, and I'm still planning to borrow 10k to support her as her mother and siblings would be looking forward to my own contribution.
To add this:
Last Friday I paid her an unanouced visit,I met her with a guy,the guy left when I arrived. I didn't mention it and she didn't either. I pretended as if nothing happened,because if I were to fight this now, won't her parent think that it's because of freedom ceremony that I don't have money to contribute, that's why I come up with such?? I'm also afraid of pouring my hard earned money down the drain
Spanking or criticism is welcomed….
Criticism and sparkling are welcomed.
I'm a poor narrator,pardon my unnecessary

2 Likes 2 Shares

Re: I'm At Crossroads! ( Updated) by helinues: 1:47pm On Jan 29, 2022
Expressway or not, make sure you check both road sides, if possible check up before crossing cos Boko Haram fit dey around

7 Likes 2 Shares

Re: I'm At Crossroads! ( Updated) by Truvelisback(m): 2:01pm On Jan 29, 2022
We are listening........Next episode pls.

2 Likes

Re: I'm At Crossroads! ( Updated) by FERNANDEZISBACK: 2:05pm On Jan 29, 2022
Nothing there don't be bothered aiit..
If you are too bothered speak to her again in a more polite manner..

Don't overthink it.. wink

1 Like 1 Share

Re: I'm At Crossroads! ( Updated) by Herbephe1(m): 2:57pm On Jan 29, 2022
updated

anticipating your pieces of advice (full if wisdom)

Ogbon ologbon ni ki i je ki a pe
agba l'omugo. (Other people's wisdom
would not let us call an elder
foolish )

Rocktation, farano front page please.... for public viewing...
Re: I'm At Crossroads! ( Updated) by obinna58(m): 3:05pm On Jan 29, 2022
My God grin grin grin grin

She's playing you obviously and you're pretending to be ok with it when you're not, surprisingly she knows you're not ok with it but will be cool with her sh!ts because you're a weak man who can't stand her.


You're a damn loser if you're spending on her.

10 Likes 2 Shares

Re: I'm At Crossroads! ( Updated) by Elporo(m): 3:11pm On Jan 29, 2022
I am like the sun.
I bring light where there is darkness,
Warmth where there is none,
I dry you up, when you are wet,
I stand where all would run,
but I am not your dump.

This should be your life principle.

Don't just desire better, seek it. And, don't be scared to abandon people; most of them are only looking for the next recycle bin.

1 Like

Re: I'm At Crossroads! ( Updated) by Bluezy13(m): 3:12pm On Jan 29, 2022
Wahala for who take women seriously.

2 Likes

Re: I'm At Crossroads! ( Updated) by Nobody: 3:17pm On Jan 29, 2022
For real,I'm 90% sure she cheated. She's gaslighting your emotion, cheating women do that alot.
Sorry bro,that nigga wasn't the only one lashing her while she was away. Better cross your road already!

2 Likes

Re: I'm At Crossroads! ( Updated) by Nobody: 3:21pm On Jan 29, 2022
grin grin grin grin

1 Like

Re: I'm At Crossroads! ( Updated) by Starz825(m): 3:23pm On Jan 29, 2022
helinues:
Expressway or not, make sure you check both road sides, if possible check up before crossing cos Boko Haram fit dey around
Infact kidnappers could be lurking around the corners..op need to be very careful
Re: I'm At Crossroads! ( Updated) by Herbephe1(m): 3:32pm On Jan 29, 2022
SmellySperm:
For real,I'm 90% sure she cheated. She's gaslighting your emotion, cheating women do that alot.
Sorry bro,that nigga wasn't the only one lashing her while she was away. Better cross your road already!



thanks for your response Sir.
l was thinking the same thing. l think I mistook her nice attitude she always displays most especially to the male,for being friendly.
Her mother and siblings are telling her to get married after her graduation despite the fact that they know I'm still a student, being sponsored by my parents.
could it be that,they(her mom and siblings) noticed that she might not be able to keep her body till I'm ready??
Re: I'm At Crossroads! ( Updated) by Nyascobar1414: 3:33pm On Jan 29, 2022
Op en do me like say ah for carry pepsi bottle waya that your skull... Why are you such a simp...

She has already done the cheating no two ways bout that... Girl you never marry you wan borrow 10k to Impress some shii...

Just GTFOutta here pls...

Your Ignorance is beyond my Understanding

2 Likes

Re: I'm At Crossroads! ( Updated) by Herbephe1(m): 3:38pm On Jan 29, 2022
obinna58:
My God grin grin grin grin

She's playing you obviously and you're pretending to be ok with it when you're not, surprisingly she knows you're ok with it but will be cool with her sh!ts because you're a weak man who can't stand her.


You're a damn loser if you're spending on
[/q









hmmmm... thanks for awakening me from my slumber
l promises her today, I'm very sure She would be coming today to collect the money grin grin grin grin grin
Re: I'm At Crossroads! ( Updated) by Savedday: 3:46pm On Jan 29, 2022
9ja girls are out to add more burden to your life instead of softening it.

3 Likes

Re: I'm At Crossroads! ( Updated) by Premiumwriter: 4:07pm On Jan 29, 2022
If you marry that girl, you'll be making a big mistake.

And she's not the problem. You are your own problem.

You have very low standards. A girl you are dating and even thinking about marriage plans came to you after a month away with a ring from another nigga and all you could do was keeping quiet.

It doesn't even bother or make you angry. The only thing that made you angry was her wearing it to your house.

That's like saying she can cheat but she shouldn't let you know.

And let me guess, she kept the ring?

You have very low standards and expectations.

Bro, you are a king and should never let anyone treat you like a nobody.

Keep your money. Never give her shishi (I know you'll still give it to her because you are a people pleaser).

F*ck her and when she's ready or you are ready please move on.

Please raise your standards man. If I even see my girl de talk with another nigga in secret she know wetin go sup for my side.

Talk more of a girl who cheated on you, accepted another man's ring and you are thinking of pleasing her? Guy you De make me vex. Like seriously!

7 Likes

Re: I'm At Crossroads! ( Updated) by Demigod22: 10:27pm On Jan 29, 2022
Most people don't understand the word loyalty and fidelity in relationship. Our generation doesn't value the sanctity of relationship. Maybe because of hunger I can't tell.

OP, you deserve more than you are getting. She cheated on you, disregarded and disrespected you. She went away for just one month, and she allow guys to shift her pants because of mere 15k. Sincerely ask yourself if you really want to have such a lady as a wife. Don't hope or try to change a grown woman. A cheat will always cheat if given the opportunity.

I don't romance with things that disrespect me, self respect and self value is my motto. Don't settle for less, always do away with toxic and unhealthy relationships.

1 Like

Re: I'm At Crossroads! ( Updated) by Nemesis0147(m): 10:59pm On Jan 29, 2022
You are still a student
Why are you complicating your life?
You are being sponsored by your parents too.

They will give you money and you will give the girl...even trying to borrow and I know say na from your parents you go take pay back.

Your children will do you too!!
Re: I'm At Crossroads! ( Updated) by Herbephe1(m): 1:37am On Jan 30, 2022
Nemesis0147:
You are still a student
Why are you complicating your life?
You are being sponsored by your parents too.

They will give you money and you will give the girl...even trying to borrow and I know say na from your parents you go take pay back.

Your children will do you too!!


Not really sir, I'm a teacher earning 10k per month,and I do this during my holidays.
Thanks for your response,I really appreciate it
Re: I'm At Crossroads! ( Updated) by Herbephe1(m): 1:41am On Jan 30, 2022
helinues:
Expressway or not, make sure you check both road sides, if possible check up before crossing cos Boko Haram fit dey around

I'm awaiting your response on this

Truvelisback
Re: I'm At Crossroads! ( Updated) by jayworld15(m): 5:14am On Jan 30, 2022
Alaye OP, love is an illusion, a game of two fools where one outsmarts the other and put him or her in fetters. I guess you understand this.


Don't lose your sanctity all because of illusion. Only God loves. Even that kind of love, it comes with a game of chess and "a bottle of righteousness."

1 Like

Re: I'm At Crossroads! ( Updated) by Truvelisback(m): 7:32am On Jan 30, 2022
Herbephe1:


I'm awaiting your response on this

Truvelisback
Do u still need a prophet to tell u that she isn't for u? Let her go.
Re: I'm At Crossroads! ( Updated) by Herbephe1(m): 7:32am On Jan 30, 2022
Premiumwriter:
If you marry that girl, you'll be making a big mistake.

And she's not the problem. You are your own problem.

You have very low standards. A girl you are dating and even thinking about marriage plans came to you after a month away with a ring from another nigga and all you could do was keeping quiet.

It doesn't even bother or make you angry. The only thing that made you angry was her wearing it to your house.

That's like saying she can cheat but she shouldn't let you know.

And let me guess, she kept the ring?

You have very low standards and expectations.

Bro, you are a king and should never let anyone treat you like a nobody.

Keep your money. Never give her shishi (I know you'll still give it to her because you are a people pleaser).

F*ck her and when she's ready or you are ready please move on.

Please raise your standards man. If I even see my girl de talk with another nigga in secret she know wetin go sup for my side.

Talk more of a girl who cheated on you, accepted another man's ring and you are thinking of pleasing her? Guy you De make me vex. Like seriously!



Thanks for your response,I brought the issue here because I don't want emotions or feelings to becloud my judgement on the matter.
Tomorrow is the ceremony, thank God she didn't show up to collect the money(which I'd already decided not to give ,if I don't attend the ceremony her mother is likely to call me. I think that's the better time to spit out all the shit
Re: I'm At Crossroads! ( Updated) by Nobody: 9:33am On Jan 30, 2022
To slap sense into you dey hungry me angry

1 Like

Re: I'm At Crossroads! ( Updated) by Premiumwriter: 10:36am On Jan 30, 2022
Herbephe1:




Thanks for your response,I brought the issue here because I don't want emotions or feelings to becloud my judgement on the matter.
Tomorrow is the ceremony, thank God she didn't show up to collect the money(which I'd already decided not to give , if I don't attend the ceremony her mother is likely to call me. I think that's the better time to spit out all the shit

This is what I'm talking about bro.

Stop being passive for chrisaake. You are a man.

Take active steps. Call her or meet her. Tell her what her daughter has done and your own resolution or next steps you want to take.

From the look of things, you are not in control of the relationship or even your own life.

Women hate that.

They want someone who leads them, tell them what to do even if he is clueless. The confidence is all that matters.
Re: I'm At Crossroads! ( Updated) by Privatepart00: 11:07am On Jan 30, 2022
Cc: Herbephe1

What sort of family is this girl from? Is obvious her family is below average. Mother expect you to contribute for her freedom ceremony? Lol... you are a student who intended borrowing #10,000 to give her ? Lol not even to use on yourself. The girl lashed another guy lol yet you still ain’t thinking. I need to know the university you studying in . Someone like me would have told the mum , I won’t contribute to the ceremony the day she mentioned it .
What a family the girl came from that can’t foot such bills .

Sorry
Re: I'm At Crossroads! ( Updated) by HopeNeverDies: 11:11am On Jan 30, 2022
Damnnn!!! ... With the way ur taking things.. I'm sorry, u deserve to be punished by the gods...

Ur seeing something clearly and ur still coming here for advice... Lmao! Who does that. Or maybe she's a kid,.. why wearing ring around and still come to her bfs place...


Lmao
Re: I'm At Crossroads! ( Updated) by Originalsly: 11:20am On Jan 30, 2022
Hmmm..... "she went to Ogun State to find money" ..... and you didn't ask how. On her return ... with what she told you ... and love ring as evidence... you are still clueless. You should give her the N10k .... be yourself.
Re: I'm At Crossroads! ( Updated) by Fmlao: 11:37am On Jan 30, 2022
Pus"y is meant to be knack but na d 10k part dey vex me.

Dont be emotional. Attend the freedom, eat, takeaway food and drinks.
Ghost the girl and be patience, she will come around. Dig her hole, dig her hole till she break up herself
Re: I'm At Crossroads! ( Updated) by Yohans(m): 12:54pm On Jan 30, 2022
You need to break up with your gf asap.
Re: I'm At Crossroads! ( Updated) by 22o62021: 3:12pm On Jan 30, 2022
Delete and block her number for now

Or

Invite her

Fück her overnight in a rough way

Tell her goodbye

(1) (2) (Reply)

I’m Tired Of Been Lonely I Want A Relationship / How Me and my guys Beat A Nairalander / Man Seeks Help Over Wife’s Habit Of Leaving Diapers In Plates (PICTURES)

(Go Up)

Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket

Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 53
Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland.