Maxwell775:
My cousin sister (from my mother's side) who just got admitted into the university have been staying with me for the past 4 months now. I live in a 2 bedroom flat, and my house is just a throw stone to the university school gate.

Due to financial issues she couldn't rent an apartment, so she goes to school from my house. She's 20yrs old, I'm way older than her with abt 10yrs.

Before she started living with me, it was my mother who told her parents that she could stay with me, without my knowledge or permission.

The very first day she was on her way coming to my house, my mother called me and was like her sister's daughter is coming to stay with me bla bla bla.. At first I was upset, atleast she would have informed me. Am not really close to my mom's family people, we have this distance relationship (no hate, no grudges)

Now here is the problem. She likes wearing mini skirts, short gowns and tight trousers or leggings. Infact what she wears indoors is worse, she will put on very hot bum short, crop top and all manner of rubbish!!

Truth be told, I use to have strong erection whenever she walks. @20 if you see her banging body?? Slim, figure 8, coco-cola bottle shape. Her nyash dey clap if she dey walk. I don't wanna be emphasizing on that...But seriously she's tormenting me. Make I no go shift her pant, I don't wanna commit abomination. But mind you, I have a girlfriend.

Nairalanders please, How do I talk to her about dressing decently, without her feeling insecured or impression of a pervert.

It is normal to have erection, she is just like every other girls on the street after all you are not close.
It's like bringing a stranger to you and then termed her cousin.
If you two grew up together, you wouldn't have erection.
As far as I know you are completely normal and fine. Na just the title "cousin" that's is making you think twice.
If you want to bang her and she agrees go ahead, it isn't incest or anything. People marry their cousins, the only reason it is not advisable to do so is because of the risk of giving birth to child that might not be normal, the risk is low for cousins now because of diversity in genes.
It is not an abomination, sleeping with your sister is abomination and not cousins.

Op if you get money rent house for her, maybe small apartment like 50k otherwise you will later fuc.k the girl and it's abomination like you said

Kobojunkie:
Having high libido has nothing to do with what OP described. If you don't understand what libido or sex drive means, I suggest you make Google your friend..

Any man getting an erection from seeing his own daughter naked needs to go see a psychiatrist,
not make the gal feel self-conscious for a fault that has absolutely nothing to do with them. In fact I recommend such a man should not be left anywhere around female children at at point unto he has been mentally certified as being safe.

You can't stand bum shorts meaning your daughters are not safe wearing underwear or swimming trunks around you, abi? Go see a shrink abeg!

Nigerians and there lame excuses ehn.....

I am not talking about erection mind you,it is all about modesty and decency,one day I was in the sitting room with a friend and my daughter came into the place to plug her power bank as she bent down her pants were clearly visible through the bum shorts,what type of nonsense is that,so I will keep calm and pretend that it is ok and it is civilization,it is not ok,i really talked to her seriously on that issue,she can do that in their lodge in school but in my house you must be decent,it is offending to some people and you are talking about erection,you cannot go about semi naked and everybody will be avoiding to look at you,even her brothers are complaining bitterly,

godlessmind:



You're a bleeping pervert

Shebi with this comment, you have solved his issue

okoroemeka:
I am not talking about erection mind you,it is all about modesty and decency,one day I was in the sitting room with a friend and my daughter came into the place to plug her power bank as she bent down her pants were clearly visible through the bum shorts,what type of nonsense is that[/b] ,so I will keep calm and pretend that it is ok and it is civilization,it is not ok,i really talked to her seriously on that issue,she can do that in their lodge in school but in my house you must be decent,

it is offending to some people and you are talking about erection,you cannot go about semi naked and everybody will be avoiding to look at you,even her brothers are complaining bitterly,

OP is talking here of having an erection.

If you had seen that the man you were with had and erection in reaction to seeing your daughter's underwear when she was plugging her powerbank, would you have allowed him anywhere near your daughter or house after such an episode?

People go about semi-naked in most civilized nations, yet you don't here of their men walking around with erections , do you? Not that they look away ... they don't need to, and ever wonder why they don't?

Kobojunkie:
OP is talking here of having an erection.

If you had seen that the man you were with had and erection in reaction to seeing your daughter's underwear when she was plugging her powerbank, would you have allowed him anywhere near your daughter or house after such an episode?

People go about semi-naked in most civilized nations, yet you don't here of their men walking around with erections , do you? Not that they look away ... they don't need to, and ever wonder why they don't?

In Nigeria, semi naked isn't something you see everyday. People get used to stuffs u know.
If we start dressing semi naked like the Westerners do, it's only a matter of time and it becomes normal and men will stop having erection from seeing naked women.

Ichabodcrane:

In Nigeria, semi naked isn't something you see everyday. People get used to stuffs u know.
If we start dressing semi naked like the Westerners do, it's only a matter of time and it becomes normal and men will stop having erection from seeing naked women.

Please stop with the inane excuses abeg! No be the same Nigeria wey everyone grow up in be that again?

During the time of our ancestors, women walked around with exposed breasts and short skirts and there were no problems then.

No be Nigerians dey live for west wey no dey get erections working with scantily clad individuals in various places?

To start now pretending your general mental indiscipline which is the reason behind your uncontrollable erections has to do with Nigeria is bullsheet and you know. Time has nothing to with any of this. This issue has to do with personal lack 0f mental discipline and only people like OP can help resolve their lack for themselves before it is too late. .

Kobojunkie:
Please stop with the inane excuses abeg! No be the same Nigeria wey everyone grow up in be that again?

During the time of our ancestors, women walked around with exposed breasts and short skirts and there were no problems then.

No be Nigerians dey live for west wey no dey get erections working with scantily clad individuals in various places?

To start now pretending your general mental indiscipline which is the reason behind your uncontrollable erections has to do with Nigeria is bullsheet and you know. Time has nothing to with any of this. This issue has to do with personal lack 0f mental discipline and only people like OP can help resolve their lack for themselves before it is too late. .

You got a point though. But like I said, You get used to naked people when you see them too much. Olden days, our ancestors were used to seeing breasts, that explains it. Nigerians in the west get to see the same thing, no option but to get used to it. U are correct when you said OP need to help himself, but remember, not all can help themselves. Have u wondered why these married men in their 50s go after young girls when their wives are there? They are tired of seeing the same thing, that's why.
Apparently, Op can't help himself, that's why he made this thread. We just need to assist him in every way we can, to avoid another thread that might say OP raped ad killed his cousin

Ichabodcrane:

You got a point though. But like I said, You get used to naked people when you see them too much. Olden days, our ancestors were used to seeing breasts, that explains it. Nigerians in the west get to see the same thing, no option but to get used to it.

1. U are correct when you said OP need to help himself, but remember, not all can help themselves.

2. Have u wondered why these married men in their 50s go after young girls when their wives are there? They are tired of seeing the same thing, that's why.
Apparently, Op can't help himself, that's why he made this thread. We just need to assist him in every way we can, to avoid another thread that might say OP raped ad killed his cousin

1. This is all about mental discipline and the only one that can help mentally discipline a grown man at this man is the man himself. It is a choice to react sexually to an image of another human being, whether man or woman. And that choice starts in the mind - the body only reacts to the mental state. So, mental discipline is individual responsibility.

2. If Op can't help himself it means OP is mentally unstable and probably needs to be locked away before he becomes a rapist... that is how adults who refuse to develop mental discipline through self training typically end up.

Those old perverts you hear and read of raping children do so because they refused to lend themselves some mental discipline from their youth. Many of them got married believing marriage would cure them of the perverted feelings they struggled with as a result of their lack of mental discipline, but marriage is not meant to be used to cover up issues even of the mind.

In the end, they eventually men got tired of running away from themselves, giving in to the urge and we know how many of their stories end up.

Kobojunkie:
I was waiting for someone like you to stupidly quote the bible.

So here are two things. According to Jesus Christ, the fact that you are around by a woman who is not your wife is counted as sin against you.... Matthew 5 vs 27 - 28. By that standard, lusting after any woman you are not married to is a sin. This while you contradict by claiming it is OK for OP to lust after his cousin. See how foolish your attempt is?

And the same scripture also tells you that when your body part causes you to sin, that you should cut that your body part off - not someone else's body part ooo. - Matthew 5 vs 29 - 20

Where Paul suggests you should flee temptation, he didn't say you should warn other people. Instead in this case, his suggestion to you would mean that you stop lusting in your hearts after women as this is a sin and all sin is condemned as unholy to God.

Please stop quoting bible foolishly abeg!

Thank you did displaying ur higher level of stupidity. Being blinded by religion and not acknowledging the facts or reality is why this part of the world has remained backward. So cos he acknowledged the challenge he's facing by being seduced by his cousin is something not to address objectively? I gave my advice to the OP. You should give urs. My making reference to the bible doesn't nullify my statement. Give Ur own advice to the OP and quit being an e-nuisance.

F0olish ignoramus

At OP, that is a normal biological response your body is giving you but you shouldn't allow your mind dwell on it. Everytime that thought come, debunk it straight up. Lemme give you a lil solution, when ever that thought come, always tell yourself that "incest in your generation will never start from you". You need a serious time mental discipline but the way you describe the girl sef, you na bad guy . But on a serious note, na your blood.

Smartgeek:
Thank you did displaying ur higher level of stupidity. Being blinded by religion and not acknowledging the facts or reality is why this part of the world has remained backward. So cos he acknowledged the challenge he's facing by being seduced by his cousin is something not to address objectively? I gave my advice to the OP. You should give urs. My making reference to the bible doesn't nullify my statement. Give Ur own advice to the OP and quit being an e-nuisance.

F0olish ignoramus

Oh forget that you stupidly attempted to drag the standard that is the Bible into this in the first place,I am the one blinder by religion in this?

Your advice was to tell him to relax and instead scold the gal, maybe even as far as reporting her to her mum even? That is what constitutes advice in this day and age, with all the information available to you at your finger tips about such conditions as expressed by OP here?

Mentioning the bible essentially revealed the level of ignorance you yourself are operating on, something no different from where OP is in his situation. .

Kobojunkie:
Oh forget that you stupidly attempted to drag the standard that is the Bible into this in the first place,I am the one blinder by religion in this?

Your advice was to tell him to relax and instead scold the gal, maybe even as far as reporting her to her mum even? That is what constitutes advice in this day and age, with all the information available to you at your finger tips about such conditions as expressed by OP here?

Mentioning the bible essentially revealed the level of ignorance you yourself are operating on, something no different from where OP is in his situation. .

Mr Bible advocate. So having spent 2 years of your life online on Nairaland, you cannot bear the thought of someone having an opinion other than yours? So u intend driving home a point with insults, vulgarity cos u want to claim and prove to be all knowing? U keep emphasising on people abroad seeing almost clad ladies walking on the streets forgetting that it doesn't corrolate to the situation at hand. Someone wakes up in the same house almost everyday, gorgeously dressing skimpy, remotely related by blood and cos he's reacting to it, but not wanting to take action and seeking help, other people's opinion do not matter, only urs? Reiterating that he should have self discipline mental this and dat... Mehn shussh. Jumping from one thread to another typing gibberish... Carrying cane to force ur opinions down people's throat like a dictator. What kind of man are u? Claiming perfect? See ehn, don't ever jump on my mentions if u cannot address an issue headlong. Such immature and obnoxious being U are. I should have known that only trash can be received from a junkie!

Smartgeek:
Mr Bible advocate. So. Having spending 2 years of your life online on Nairaland, you cannot bear the thought of someone having an opinion other than yours? So u intend driving home a point with insults, vulgarity cos u want to claim and prove to be all knowing? U keep emphasising on people abroad seeing almost clad ladies walking on the streets forgetting that it doesn't corrolate to the situation at hand. Someone wakes up in the same house almost everyday, gorgeously dressing skimpy, remotely related by blood and cos he's reacting to it, but not wanting to take action and seeking help, other people's opinion do not matter, only urs? Reiterating that he should have self discipline mental this and dat... Mehn shussh. Jumping from one thread to another typing gibberish... Carrying cane to force ur opinions down people's throat like a dictator. What kind of man are u? Claiming perfect? See ehn, don't ever jump on my mentions if u cannot address an issue headlong. Such immature and obnoxious being Ur are. I should have known that only trash can be received from a junkie!

I see this one is now stuck on stupid...

Again....Oh forget that you stupidly attempted to drag the standard that is the Bible into this in the first place,I am the one blinder by religion in this?

Your advice was to tell him to relax and instead scold the gal, maybe even as far as reporting her to her mum even? That is what constitutes advice in this day and age, with all the information available to you at your finger tips about such conditions as expressed by OP here?

Mentioning the bible essentially revealed the level of ignorance you yourself are operating on, something no different from where OP is in his situation. .

This story is too sick, too rubbish to internalize.

Maxwell775:
[s]My cousin sister (from my mother's side) who just got admitted into the university have been staying with me for the past 4 months now. I live in a 2 bedroom flat, and my house is just a throw stone to the university school gate.

Due to financial issues she couldn't rent an apartment, so she goes to school from my house. She's 20yrs old, I'm way older than her with abt 10yrs.

Before she started living with me, it was my mother who told her parents that she could stay with me, without my knowledge or permission.

The very first day she was on her way coming to my house, my mother called me and was like her sister's daughter is coming to stay with me bla bla bla.. At first I was upset, atleast she would have informed me. Am not really close to my mom's family people, we have this distance relationship (no hate, no grudges)

Now here is the problem. She likes wearing mini skirts, short gowns and tight trousers or leggings. Infact what she wears indoors is worse, she will put on very hot bum short, crop top and all manner of rubbish!!

Truth be told, I use to have strong erection whenever she walks. @20 if you see her banging body?? Slim, figure 8, Coca-Cola bottle shape. Her nyash dey clap if she dey walk. I don't wanna be emphasizing on that...But seriously she's tormenting me. Make I no go shift her pant, I don't wanna commit abomination. But mind you, I have a girlfriend.

Nairalanders please, How do I talk to her about dressing decently, without her feeling insecured or impression of a pervert[/s].

You're mentally sick to even think of such about your cousin . Ewu

Abovebest:
Cover your face with shame bro

Why will your cousin be tempting you

Imagine your blood sister giving you erection

Honestly he's sick. I don't even get attracted to my community gals BC I view them as sisters let alone of a cousin who's a blood relative

Sarsaproko:
Just bang her if she let you. Sanusi Lamido married his cousin..So kini big deal

There is a big deal. That's why the north is a mess with almajiri children and terrorism . Islam is not the standard to follow

I mistakenly brushed my hand against my cousin’s boobs, I immediately apologized. The next thing she did was place my hand on her boobs, I had an instant erection. Prior to then, I never thought of her sexually. But after that moment, I was always getting hard around her.

Maxwell775:
My cousin sister (from my mother's side) who just got admitted into the university have been staying with me for the past 4 months now. I live in a 2 bedroom flat, and my house is just a throw stone to the university school gate.

Due to financial issues she couldn't rent an apartment, so she goes to school from my house. She's 20yrs old, I'm way older than her with abt 10yrs.

Before she started living with me, it was my mother who told her parents that she could stay with me, without my knowledge or permission.

The very first day she was on her way coming to my house, my mother called me and was like her sister's daughter is coming to stay with me bla bla bla.. At first I was upset, atleast she would have informed me. Am not really close to my mom's family people, we have this distance relationship (no hate, no grudges)

Now here is the problem. She likes wearing mini skirts, short gowns and tight trousers or leggings. Infact what she wears indoors is worse, she will put on very hot bum short, crop top and all manner of rubbish!!

Truth be told, I use to have strong erection whenever she walks. @20 if you see her banging body?? Slim, figure 8, Coca-Cola bottle shape. Her nyash dey clap if she dey walk. I don't wanna be emphasizing on that...But seriously she's tormenting me. Make I no go shift her pant, I don't wanna commit abomination. But mind you, I have a girlfriend.

Nairalanders please, How do I talk to her about dressing decently, without her feeling insecured or impression of a pervert.

Guy!!!
Your Own KONJI is on another level. To prevent stories that touch, just leave the house for am, go rent another one. Or you call your GF make she park in. Because I no wan see headline tomorrow say "Male Cousin Dokes & Gives Female Cousin From Mother's Side Belle", if e happen, we go DRAG you for this space, to be forewarned is to be forearmed

Favfables1:
Chief OP...
Honestly dude...
You need help ...
But first...
Let her know that you're not comfortable with her kind of dressing...

Wait!!! Is it abnormal to have errection for your cousin sister you have never know before?

Cousins sometimes are like those girls you meet out there that you like... They are purely distance blood so sometimes arousals around them pops up. Especially those that are beautiful enough to be admired. For me I can be very jovial , thats something I do naturally and me I'll jovially tell her the truth of how tempting she's looking to me and she should help me help her before we hear another lindaikejis hot gossips and trust me no one gets offended and the message is passed.

Stedygrowth:
Op, what you're going through is normal. The response you're experiencing is completely biological in nature, remember, you have not met her before. She, being your cousin's sister, does not in any way, stop from being a woman she is. The problem here is that, there is no conditioning between you two that establish the fact that you guys are sisters, as such, there is a clear prediction that if you have opportunity, you will make love to her.
Based on the above submission, I will suggest you help her find a place to stay. Even if she changes the way she dresses from now on, it will not still change anything, because you have been conditioned already. Until you will not rest. So, to be on the safe side, find a place for her as quickly as possible.
This does not require discipline, it require removing or staying away from the source of the stimulus. If you keep staying, you will do it one day.

The most sensible comment here

Most comments here are just full of Hypocrisy. Don't you all know that a man is moved by sight? People just make comments just for trolling purpose without being logical. Op you better tell her to dress properly and don't ever feel offended by your statement. The way things are going, it's definitely you guys will eventually have sex. Having two adults of different gender if not your direct siblings in same house is not good especially if one gender is making efforts to look nasty. It's either you give an excuse you are traveling somewhere just to discharge her or you rent another accommodation for her. We are all humans and are prone to temptation. Even some men of God dey fall for the sight of women let alone a regular guy. Na blood dey your body and not water.

Kobojunkie:
OP is talking here of having an erection.

If you had seen that the man you were with had and erection in reaction to seeing your daughter's underwear when she was plugging her powerbank, would you have allowed him anywhere near your daughter or house after such an episode?

People go about semi-naked in most civilized nations, yet you don't here of their men walking around with erections , do you? Not that they look away ... they don't need to, and ever wonder why they don't?

you are funny,so I will be monitoring my elderly tenant that came to me for an important discussion if he had an erection or if I see a semi naked woman I will be starting at her like zombie,do you think everyone in nairaland is still a teenager that walk around with erection all the time like high tension pole if they see a naked woman,if you have a daughter let her wear bikini and go to the market outside it is civilization.

True.
A young man then a student of Abuja University once impregnated his biological mother because they were sleeping on same bed naked.
He was an only child.

Kolenda:

Very mature response you've got here. Not all these ones thinking it's a taboo that OP's biological activity is taking place.
Like the OP said, he's not close with the cousin and their family. So it's possible that his mind has not been conditioned to accept the girl as his cousin sister

Stedygrowth:
Op, what you're going through is normal. The response you're experiencing is completely biological in nature, remember, you have not met her before. She, being your cousin's sister, does not in any way, stop from being a woman she is. The problem here is that, there is no conditioning between you two that establish the fact that you guys are sisters, as such, there is a clear prediction that if you have opportunity, you will make love to her.
Based on the above submission, I will suggest you help her find a place to stay. Even if she changes the way she dresses from now on, it will not still change anything, because you have been conditioned already. Until you will not rest. So, to be on the safe side, find a place for her as quickly as possible.
This does not require discipline, it require removing or staying away from the source of the stimulus. If you keep staying, you will do it one day.

the only sensible person on this thread

iLoveYouToo:
Who says ‘Cousin sister’ ? SMH

i thought i was the only one that hates hearing that thing "cousin sister" and "cousin brother"

candidladyTemp:


Do iknow you

Please stay outta my mention please

stop all these nonsense.

You comment on a public forum, it doesn't matter if you know or don't know the person.


And try to grow up abeg

When did having erection become a crime again, The crime is allowing the erection to control your behaviour/reaction. Men are moved by what they see which is perfectly normal, the cousin is a woman first before being a family to him. Decency should be encouraged rather than passing blames, the man must be decent and so should the woman too.

Some are here using civilised country to judge this matter but they forgot that incest is also common over there too than in Africa. We have also seen celebrities having erection while on stage, footballers having erection on the pitch, this is just a biological problem with men.

Here in Africa the only nude we are used to is our own personal nude we see on our bathroom mirrors and of course those from porn. Any other nude we see are as a result of sexual exposure or mistakes.

@OP read the riot act to her and let her know that her actions are bad, make sure you record the audio when you are doing this for future defence should it result in a blackmail. If she refuse tell her to get a new accomodation before you lose it.

Abovebest:
Cover your face with shame bro

Why will your cousin be tempting you

Imagine your blood sister giving you erection

It’s not his blood sister. Hypocrite.


Also, OP, note that she’s doing it on purpose because she likes you.

If she didn’t like you, you will not even see her legs, talk more of tummy