I am asking on behalf of a friend who is trying to consider divorce as last option, who is going to have custody of the kids, Mom or Dad..

Is their any way to go about it considering any legal way or traditional way to make the woman have custody, they are Yorubas.

Please note! the woman in question is the one I'm concerned about...

Your Opinion will be appreciated, thanks...



@ lalasticlala

The age and gender of the kids will determine. If they are small less than 10, females, disabled. They will likely go to the mother.

Another factor is who are they currently with?, and does either spouse have a character/habit that may be harmful to children

Richy4:
How old are the children and who is the primary caregiver between the two? Care giver ie (waking them up, bathing, feeding, cooking, taking them to school, visiting hospital, playing with them etc)

Mother does all that extended to major home financing......

HeyHey:
The age and gender of the kids will determine. If they are small less than 10, females, disabled. They will likely go to the mother.

Another factor is who are they currently with?, and does either spouse have a character/habit that may be harmful to children

Less than 10yrs, but you know Yoruba culture where the man stands to claims the right to have the children....

ibrutex:




Less than 10yrs, but you know Yoruba culture where the man stands to claims the right to have the children....

Individual's culture is not what the courts considers but what is of the best interest of the child(ren).

Mindlog:


Individual's culture is not what the courts considers but what is of the best interest of the child(ren).

Does it matter if court wedding was not done, the couple's had religious wedding , sorry I'm naive on this part

ibrutex:




Does it matter if court wedding was not done, the couple's had religious wedding , sorry I'm naive on this part

Even if court wedding was not done. Let her get a lawyer involved.

Useless man.
Allow that woman to go in peace and leave those children to be trained by their father.

You are plotting to destroy another person's marriage. Your life will be wrecked.

This is how single mothers train most badly behaved idiots we have in the society today.

The father must train those children in the way they should grow.
We can't allow the proliferation of simps as a result of disgusting single mothers we have everywhere.

ibrutex:




Does it matter if court wedding was not done, the couple's had religious wedding , sorry I'm naive on this part

Even if court wedding was not done, or traditional “Egbe yawo “. If she goes to customary court or a district customary court, she will still get the kids on those grounds, with maintenance (money) . Just get a good lawyer

satandeterrible:
Useless man.
Allow that woman to go in peace and leave those children to be trained by their father.

You are plotting to destroy another person's marriage. Your life will be wrecked.

This is how single mothers train most badly behaved idiots we have in the society today.

The father must train those children in the way they should grow.
We can't allow the proliferation of simps as a result of disgusting single mothers we have everywhere.

Who is this shrimp??

Must you transfer your frustration on every topic ......... Go back to your quarters in yaba left mumu

ibrutex:




Who is this shrimp??

Must you transfer your frustration on every topic ......... Go back to your quarters in yaba left mumu

You should have read his moniker, so you don't bother replying him.

ibrutex:




Does it matter if court wedding was not done, the couple's had religious wedding , sorry I'm naive on this part

Having custody of children does not mean they no longer belong to their dad.


If they were properly married,

(in my opinion, proper marriage means bride price has been paid, dazzall)


The father has a claim to them also, if the couple has issues, they should sort it out between them and not drag the kids into their squabble.


That said, custody means living with them and taking care of them.


So, yes, she can have custody and care for them while they are young, then when they grow up, they can make their choices. If she doesn't want it, she can hand them over to him while she monitors their growth.



Now, if he is not taking care of them presently, what you should be doing is to try to get him to do more, not discard him.



Let her think very deeply before making decisions.

The woman should be the one to have full custody of the children, unless proven that she's not fit to be their legal guardian, maybe because she's a drug addict or an alcoholic, and etc.

They belong with their mother, but the two parties can agree to have a joint custody of the children, therefore, the children would still be able to see both their mother and father even though they're divorced.

This can also apply to those couple who didn't do a civil wedding or those who have never married before.

Saintmary:



Having custody of children does not mean they no longer belong to their dad.


If they were properly married,

(in my opinion, proper marriage means bride price has been paid, dazzall)


The father has a claim to them also, if the couple has issues, they should sort it out between them and not drag the kids into their squabble.


That said, custody means living with them and taking care of them.


So, yes, she can have custody and care for them while they are young, then when they grow up, they can make their choices. If she doesn't want it, she can hand them over to him while she monitors their growth.



Now, if he is not taking care of them presently, what you should be doing is to try to get him to do more, not discard him.



Let her think very deeply before making decisions.

Thanks for your contribution,

It has been a one sided relationship all this while,she pays all the bills while the man has refused to work ever since marriage or assist in caring for the children, now she's having some health issues due to too much thinking and she feels the husband doesn't love her anymore, all other persuasive means has been tried to talk to the husband who has refused to change.....for her sanity sake that's why she wants divorce

ibrutex:





Thanks for your contribution,

It has been a one sided relationship all this while,she pays all the bills while the man has refused to work ever since marriage or assist in caring for the children, now she's having some health issues due to too much thinking and she feels the husband doesn't love her anymore, all other persuasive means has been tried to talk to the husband who has refused to change.....for her sanity sake that's why she wants divorce

Technically, she has been living like a single mom all this while.



The first stage is separation if all other measures have failed, she should get another apartment and leave this one to him so it won't look like she's kicking him out.



Let her report him to the police, they will refer her to the necessary authorities. Now, before reporting to the police, she should brace up because he will never forgive her even though he's at fault. She has made a complete end of whatever is left of that marriage. (I'm just telling her the reality)



The Police will help them with the next step to take. She might not need to go to court after all.




Now, as for custody, she will automatically get it since she's more financially capable.



Good luck.