| Re: Wedding Preparations Without A Job!! by XullySwt(f): 1:50pm On Aug 25, 2022 |
InshaAllah Thanks alot brother, God bless u . Jazakhallahu khairan mukthar2000:
is better u shine it sisterpls and pls don't be too despite of having partner, Allah no best plans for everyone of us, loving u for 2 or 10 years doesn't mean the be ur real partner, just be very carefully and be prayerful for Allah to choose the best for u inshAllah |
| Re: Wedding Preparations Without A Job!! by Danny5050: 1:54pm On Aug 25, 2022 |
You're about to make a big mistakes. Don't dare leave your job. You already said he's a job hunter, for now he has to grow financially before going ahead with married. Remember, you've a kid, so Stick to your job and be taking care of your children when he's financially okay to some extent you may now go ahead with the wedding. But pls don't leave your job. |
| Re: Wedding Preparations Without A Job!! by Fadoria: 1:57pm On Aug 25, 2022 |
spice123:
Let me give you a candid advice as a married man:
1. Maintain your teaching job. You are a mother with two lovely kids. Don't let those children suffer for your careless mistake.
2. Talk to him to move to Abuja with you. You are already settled with a job and stable so he too needs to support you by joining you to start looking for job opportunities at Abuja.
3. If he insists in staying in his comfort zone (Zaria) without making effort to get a job, please leave him and go back to Abuja and continue your job.
4. A man cannot be talking of marriage when he does not have a stable income. I was a teacher earning 30k in the east when I met my wife in Lagos. My wife was earning twice my salary. I had move down to Lagos because we wanted to get married. We postponed our wedding by 3 months until I got another job that was paying 45k. That was 8 years ago. No matter how little the salary is, let your man have something doing.
My one piece advice. well said ,more knowledge unto u 1 Like |
| Re: Wedding Preparations Without A Job!! by 2buffagain(m): 2:10pm On Aug 25, 2022 |
XullySwt:
Good evening everyone, thank God for life coz that alone is indeed a great blessing.
I will be brief with my post here i promise 
Indeed i have seen life at its worst....
After mourning my husband i decided to leave my city Kaduna to begin a new life with my kids,yeah a boy and a girl.
I started from the scratch here in Abuja, from lesson that paid not upto #6000 to a school that pays #20,000 and presently am working in a school that pays not less than #50,000 all these boils down to my hardwork and perseverance and above all God.
Alright this the main ishhh, i met this single, understanding and loving guy that have already paid for my dowry and wedding is coming up November this year 
Now my fear..... We love each other, he loves my kids so dearly we have been together for almost 2 years now that's why he decided to move the relationship further.
Ohh yes, i said my fear, his currently a job hunter ? 
we thought things would get better before the wedding but Nigeria got no chill sincerely so now i have to leave my job and follow him to his city where he base so as to help him with his little business hoping things would get better.
So now my question, Am i doing the right thing by moving to his city or i should continue with my job and wait till he gets a better job??
Adding that his in his mid 30's and willing to settle down.
Please my people advice me. Or if you can help him pass through this stage of life, blessings will follow you.....
He is a graduate and lives in Zaria. God bless you all.
Between sorry for any blunders or typo error, am just seeing double He sounds like an unwise man. You don't tell your woman to leave what she is doing and come and meet you until you have prepared a place for her. One thing before the other. |
| Re: Wedding Preparations Without A Job!! by frozen70(f): 2:16pm On Aug 25, 2022 |
XullySwt:
Oh dear, am happy this comment is coming from a female like me.
My dear we aren't planning for any big wedding, i do much appreciate ur advice i like it. Thanks for ur compliments. Thanks Sis Reading your post gave me some happiness for you I Wish you well |
| Re: Wedding Preparations Without A Job!! by XullySwt(f): 2:40pm On Aug 25, 2022 |
Is the other way round dear. He prefer relocating down here but the issue sm looking at is the cost of living in Abuja, Zaria is much better thus my idea of moving dr 2buffagain:
He sounds like an unwise man.
You don't tell your woman to leave what she is doing and come and meet you until you have prepared a place for her.
One thing before the other. |
| Re: Wedding Preparations Without A Job!! by XullySwt(f): 2:40pm On Aug 25, 2022 |
XullySwt:
Is the other way round dear. He prefer relocating down here but the issue am looking at is the cost of living in Abuja, Zaria is much better thus my idea of moving dr |
| Re: Wedding Preparations Without A Job!! by labelle123(f): 2:56pm On Aug 25, 2022 |
Even people with well paying jobs are not finding it easy let alone without one. He should just slow down and find sth to do first no matter how little |
| Re: Wedding Preparations Without A Job!! by okunola123(m): 3:33pm On Aug 25, 2022 |
There's nothing bad to move along with her once you both love each other and he's already pay your dowry. But try to tell him to make you work atleast 2month salary before wedding and also, you a teacher and you can teach in anywhere you found yourself if you are good at teach. |
| Re: Wedding Preparations Without A Job!! by sync(f): 3:44pm On Aug 25, 2022 |
Ok you are seeing double ko.
Go ahead and marry a jobless man, na triple you go see |
| Re: Wedding Preparations Without A Job!! by XullySwt(f): 3:50pm On Aug 25, 2022 |
ifihearam:
Your story is incoherent..he has no job yet he has a business? you have two kids and dated a jobless guy for two years? he paid your dowry and planning wedding for november on what budget? Please clarify.
No mater what you do, do not leave your job..your kids come first..beside that will still cause issues in nearest future because you wont want to fall pregnant anytime soon and when you eventually do,he will not treat the three kids as equal trust me.
P>S...From the stories I read recently on nairaland,I cant say for a fact who is more desperate to get maried between Nigerian men and woman lately. |
| Re: Wedding Preparations Without A Job!! by XullySwt(f): 3:53pm On Aug 25, 2022 |
He has a business his managing, yes he paid my dowry from that business and hard work. We were friends all dish while before it became serious last year ending. Thanks alot for ur advice, i appreciate. ifihearam:
Your story is incoherent..he has no job yet he has a business? you have two kids and dated a jobless guy for two years? he paid your dowry and planning wedding for november on what budget? Please clarify.
No mater what you do, do not leave your job..your kids come first..beside that will still cause issues in nearest future because you wont want to fall pregnant anytime soon and when you eventually do,he will not treat the three kids as equal trust me.
P>S...From the stories I read recently on nairaland,I cant say for a fact who is more desperate to get maried between Nigerian men and woman lately. |
| Re: Wedding Preparations Without A Job!! by XullySwt(f): 4:02pm On Aug 25, 2022 |
Oh my dear, not everyone think alike. I still wonder why he wants to marry an overused woman But then some overused unique women are rare and hard to come by maybe that's why he stick to me Savedday:
What am trying to understand is, what kind of a man will marry a woman, that has 2 kinds, when he has no income?
That man is not in his right senses, you have use juju for the man. That is why he want to marry an overused woman with two kinds.
What a shame! 1 Like |
| Re: Wedding Preparations Without A Job!! by XullySwt(f): 4:02pm On Aug 25, 2022 |
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| Re: Wedding Preparations Without A Job!! by XullySwt(f): 4:03pm On Aug 25, 2022 |
[quote author=XullySwt post=116052388[/quote] |
| Re: Wedding Preparations Without A Job!! by Wwwq: 4:23pm On Aug 25, 2022 |
Suffering offcourse after wedding |
| Re: Wedding Preparations Without A Job!! by olaodun: 6:40pm On Aug 25, 2022 |
People have said the best thing for u Abuja is safe and economic viable than Zaria , as a graduate in Abuja you can easily get driving job or a teacher . pls as a mother dont rely on any man to train your children always have more than |
| Re: Wedding Preparations Without A Job!! by harmony75: 6:45pm On Aug 25, 2022 |
You're a widow with kids still you have time for a jobless man!? Must you marry? With what you have been through so marriage with a jobless person that's coming to make your life and that of your children miserable I have seen where step father come in to a woman's life and kill her children � even kill the woman. My sister you have make a big mistake in first place looking for love with a jobless man don't you know these set of people are always frustrated, sad and they make life unbearable for gentle and responsible people? Stay in Abuja till he gets that job or return the dowry and stay peacefully with your kids. He's coming for you bc he sees you're hard worker. So please stay single and look out for someone who is hardworking like you. Some men are cunning you move in with him now na pepper you go see sebi he's pretending to love your kids now you're happy, you better retrieve your steps dey your own jeje he's not employ and he want to marry?! Who does that this guy's a wicked person. I don't know why people don't learn so even in this your condition na suffer you like!? Abeg run � � � away from that man so he can get a job to care for you, you will see that he will run away if he's not genuine. If am in your shoes it is the BEST I will go for bc me too I'm not lazy. Why are you rushing into marriage for s*x abeg stay single and take care of yourself and your kids and enjoy your life!!!! ❤️ |
| Re: Wedding Preparations Without A Job!! by ashewoboy(m): 8:43pm On Aug 25, 2022 |
XullySwt:
Good evening everyone, thank God for life coz that alone is indeed a great blessing.
I will be brief with my post here i promise
Indeed i have seen life at its worst....
After mourning my husband i decided to leave my city Kaduna to begin a new life with my kids,yeah a boy and a girl.
I started from the scratch here in Abuja, from lesson that paid not upto #6000 to a school that pays #20,000 and presently am working in a school that pays not less than #50,000 all these boils down to my hardwork and perseverance and above all God.
Alright this the main ishhh, i met this single, understanding and loving guy that have already paid for my dowry and wedding is coming up November this year
Now my fear..... We love each other, he loves my kids so dearly we have been together for almost 2 years now that's why he decided to move the relationship further.
Ohh yes, i said my fear, his currently a job hunter ?
we thought things would get better before the wedding but Nigeria got no chill sincerely so now i have to leave my job and follow him to his city where he base so as to help him with his little business hoping things would get better.
So now my question, Am i doing the right thing by moving to his city or i should continue with my job and wait till he gets a better job??
Adding that his in his mid 30's and willing to settle down.
Please my people advice me. Or if you can help him pass through this stage of life, blessings will follow you.....
He is a graduate and lives in Zaria. God bless you all.
Between sorry for any blunders or typo error, am just seeing double How old are you@op? |
| Re: Wedding Preparations Without A Job!! by XullySwt(f): 10:23pm On Aug 25, 2022 |
This comment caught me aha I will do as you said, i appreciate the way you took out ur time to write this in details, God bless Powersurge:
1. What business is he doing?
2. How was he able to live for two years when he has no job? Does he have other sources of income?
3. What skills does he have?
People get mind sha. I am in my mid 30s I am currently earning around 200k yet I won't dare marriage unless my wife is earning something as well (at least 50k).
I perceived you guys are from the north. Things could be different over there (cheaper things, food might not be a problem etc). If not, person no get source of income won marry a woman with kids. Hian!
My advice. Study the business. Is it yielding something? If you guys put more effort can it sustain you? How are other people doing the same business performing? If you even forget your career and marry him are u sure after growing the business he wouldn't bring other people that will be benefiting from your labor? Do you see him as ambitious person? How badly do you need the marriage? Do you think your children need a father figure? Sit down and sincerely answer these questions. Then make your decision. 1 Like 1 Share |
| Re: Wedding Preparations Without A Job!! by XullySwt(f): 10:23pm On Aug 25, 2022 |
XullySwt:
This comment caught me sha
I will do as you said, i appreciate the way you took out ur time to write this in details, God bless |
| Re: Wedding Preparations Without A Job!! by XullySwt(f): 2:25pm On Aug 26, 2022 |
Ameen Thank you dear Newyorkitis:
Plan a tiny wedding.
Leave the crowd out of it.
Or postpone the wedding till when things gets better.
May God bless the works of the both of you. 1 Like |
| Re: Wedding Preparations Without A Job!! by XullySwt(f): 2:25pm On Aug 26, 2022 |
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| Re: Wedding Preparations Without A Job!! by sekem: 9:37am On Aug 27, 2022 |
XullySwt:
Good evening everyone, thank God for life coz that alone is indeed a great blessing.
I will be brief with my post here i promise
Indeed i have seen life at its worst....
After mourning my husband i decided to leave my city Kaduna to begin a new life with my kids,yeah a boy and a girl.
I started from the scratch here in Abuja, from lesson that paid not upto #6000 to a school that pays #20,000 and presently am working in a school that pays not less than #50,000 all these boils down to my hardwork and perseverance and above all God.
Alright this the main ishhh, i met this single, understanding and loving guy that have already paid for my dowry and wedding is coming up November this year
Now my fear..... We love each other, he loves my kids so dearly we have been together for almost 2 years now that's why he decided to move the relationship further.
Ohh yes, i said my fear, his currently a job hunter ?
we thought things would get better before the wedding but Nigeria got no chill sincerely so now i have to leave my job and follow him to his city where he base so as to help him with his little business hoping things would get better.
So now my question, Am i doing the right thing by moving to his city or i should continue with my job and wait till he gets a better job??
Adding that his in his mid 30's and willing to settle down.
Please my people advice me. Or if you can help him pass through this stage of life, blessings will follow you.....
He is a graduate and lives in Zaria. God bless you all.
Between sorry for any blunders or typo error, am just seeing double Abort! Abort! Suicide mission! Do you read me loud and clear?! I say abort! 1 Like |
| Re: Wedding Preparations Without A Job!! by Godsownfc(m): 11:20pm On Nov 18, 2022 |
Nigeria is not smiling, be careful o |
