SGANIVA:
My wife is with her family for the past one month now , when there call and pleasure becomes too much ,I went to my in-laws place and explain to her parents why is not really possible to hold an occasion now because of the major shake up and no capital for now . no kind of insult I didn't received from her parents ,

Which is ,oga why do you marry our daughter if you know you are not rich and capable of marrying our daughter , with so many other bad mouthing

You must be from Anambra too. It's pressure not pleasure

SGANIVA:
Well my wife lacks nothing , my business can't even collapse even if I stay at home for a year but there response towards this issue is so disheartening , seems she married me for the wrong reasons .

This is not the kind of response I expect from my surpose in-laws and there daughter , and definitely this is not the kind of woman I wanted

You're insane. Do the rites, you said your business is shaking yet you're having empty boasting here about how strong your business is

Marriage is not by force Kings... Marriage doesn't make you a responsible man... Or woman..

Y'all stay away from that sh*t



Motor shafts? Check my signature

Lvgirl:

I know the man go don knack her before. That is the truth.

I don’t understand this stupid statement. So if you use your hand find babe, e mean say them never knack am?

I wonder how u will married someone without knowing their culture... Is marriage by force?
Anyway,go and finish what you started


You can as well leave her with her family... When they are tired they will send her back shikenan

Am not boasting ,I suspended any other ceremonies till next year but backlash and words am hearing from this people is uncalled for .a person that sells tricycle and even empower youth with it , with more than 30youth empowered can't be boasting

Tunjibalogun:

You're insane. Do the rites, you said your business is shaking yet you're having empty boasting here about how strong your business is

Bride price paid , with all due traditional rite ,this alone cost 800k ,I wanted settle all this with money but the refused, that the usual traditional marriage ceremony and wedding must take place within this period of a Time because there daughter is pregnant, while I put the date next year but the are threatening to seazed my child

imadiyi:

I have a few questions to ask before I can be able to give precise solution that will quell their pressure.

1. Did you pay her bride price?

2. Have you institutionalized the marriage? and

3. Prior to the traditional rite, were you informed that the Igba Nkwu must be done before she can be recognized as your wife?

With these questions answered, you will get the answer you seek.

Kobicove:
Oga in Igbo land if you have not done Igbá nkwù then you have not officially married the lady

Please go and complete the journey you started!

The occasion where you spent 800K is not the main one therefore you should not have spent so much money on it!

Stop lying please, once a lady's bride price is paid, she's officially as good as married. igba nkwo or white wedding is just merriment

SGANIVA:
Well my wife lacks nothing , my business can't even collapse even if I stay at home for a year but there response towards this issue is so disheartening , seems she married me for the wrong reasons .

This is not the kind of response I expect from my surpose in-laws and there daughter , and definitely this is not the kind of woman I wanted

Some inlaws are not family...they are fvckimg parasites from the day one especially from some Nigerian tribes...

u will pay and its not paying thats the problem
.its the inconsiderate and entitlement behavior thats annoying.... watch how they will still send brother inlaws and sister inlaws to your home for you to sponsor.....

Before paying the bride price , you have to bring or buy whatever that is on that list , some list go humble you ,igba nkwu and wedding is merriment, and if to say the agreed to collect Cash ,I could have settled them same day knowing fully well is wedding that is remaining ,but my wife became pregnant just under two months , that is why the are giving me this problems, which I don't know maybe is there plan with there daughter.

RomanGreen:


Stop lying please, once a lady's bride price is paid, she's officially as good as married. igba nkwo or white wedding is just merriment

See y we say they are useless? Kindly dissolve the marriage, if not, you are on your way to early grave .

9ja girls don't love and dey will never love u.

They are nothing but useless. All of them...

Know this and know peace

SGANIVA:
Before paying the bride price , you have to bring or buy whatever that is on that list , some list go humble you ,igba nkwu and wedding is merriment, and if to say the agreed to collect Cash ,I could have settled them same day knowing fully well is wedding that is remaining ,but my wife became pregnant just under two months , that is why the are giving me this problems, which I don't know maybe is there plan with there daughter.

Bros, since your wife is pregnant... you're in he position to dictate the tune, normally them suppose dey beg you to come do the rites and if your supposed inlaws aren't helping cut down the bill, baba check well o, they may be seeing you as a cash cow. Think about it and consider also the attitude of your wife

Savedday:
See y we say they are useless? Kindly dissolve the marriage, if not, you are on your way to early grave .

9ja girls don't love and dey will never love u.

They are nothing but useless. All of them...

Know this and know peace

Hahahaha, e be like say them don too do you

I don't know if many people here even understand what am saying ,I sell tricycle, Keke and also gives out on hire purchase bases here in onitsha,I got married and full fill all traditional rite , now fix my wedding and traditional ceremony next year but with look of things and money that is involved .

I approached my in-laws to inform them my plans for ceremony the next year but the refuse because the know there daughter is pregnant already threatening me or all type of foul languages , now with lough calculation this things might cost extra 2milion , first Na season we dey , second as a business man , you will fix things that is convenient for your business , but with all this am afraid to continue with this kind of in-laws and wife ,I don't know maybe the think my business collapse because of the ones we did ,by asking me why I should marry there daughter if I know I don't have money

SGANIVA:
Am not boasting ,I suspended any other ceremonies till next year but backlash and words am hearing from this people is uncalled for .a person that sells tricycle and even empower youth with it , with more than 30youth empowered can't be boasting

But you just complained you don't have money, hence reason for delay. You're confused speaking from both sides of your mouth

I thought once you pay the bride price you are married already in igbo land.

I honestly don't understand what the issue is about.

Maybe there's something else or their family has some specifications to it. Because I am not understanding. And I know lots of Ibo people do the traditional stuff now and the other white much more later so what's the matter?

SGANIVA:
I don't know if many people here even understand what am saying ,I sell tricycle, Keke and also gives out on hire purchase bases here in onitsha,I got married and full fill all traditional rite , now fix my wedding and traditional ceremony next year but with look of things and money that is involved .

I approached my in-laws to inform them my plans for ceremony the next year but the refuse because the know there daughter is pregnant already threatening me or all type of foul languages , now with lough calculation this things might cost extra 2milion , first Na season we dey , second as a business man , you will fix things that is convenient for your business , but with all this am afraid to continue with this kind of in-laws and wife ,I don't know maybe the think my business collapse because of the ones we did ,by asking me why I should marry there daughter if I know I don't have money

please don't do anything that is inconvenient for your business, don't allow your business to collapse because if it does, they'll eventually collect there daughter from you, carry your people to go and have discussion with them on when you want to do and the reason,if they refuse then leave her with them,till the convenient time for you.

SGANIVA:
Bride price paid , with all due traditional rite ,this alone cost 800k ,I wanted settle all this with money but the refused, that the usual traditional marriage ceremony and wedding must take place within this period of a Time because there daughter is pregnant, while I put the date next year but the are threatening to seazed my child

Having paid the bride price, which is traditionally recognized by custom, the marriage had been sealed, and she's your wife. The traditional ceremony, otherwise known as refreshment in the social cycle of aggrandizement, can be postponed and later done at a convenient date. However, it is very paramount in the eyes of your in-laws and the public, because it command respect.

Here are your possible solution:

1. If they insist, tell them you don't have much, and you would like to do it in a smaller form. When meeting with them, It will be wise for you to involve some senior members of your family.

2. Since your wife decided to stay back with her parents/family, it means she had taken side with them. In this case, go to the family, tell them you need to register your wife for prenatal/antenatal. If they insist on having their way, go to a competent lawyer, file a legal action for endangering your unborn child. This case is possible even if their daughter is not customary or legally married to you, as far as the seed in her womb is yours. Note: this may caused you your relationship with the family. But it's very effective. After giving birth, you may decided to dissolve the marriage if the relationship becomes sour.

Among the two possible solution above, I will advise you to go for the first. Even if it's a small gbedu, just give it to them as their last supper.

Thanks,

imadiyi:

Having paid the bride price, which is traditionally recognized by custom, the marriage had been sealed, and she's your wife. The traditional ceremony, otherwise known as refreshment in the social cycle of aggrandizement, can be postponed and later done at a convenient date. However, it is very paramount in the eyes of your in-laws and the public, because it command respect.

Here are your possible solution:

1. If they insist, tell them you don't have much, and you would like to do it in a smaller form. When meeting with them, It will be wise for you to involve some senior members of your family.

2. Since your wife decided to stay home with her parents/family, it means she had taken side with them. In this case, go to the family, tell them you need to register your wife for prenatal/antenatal. If they insist on having their way, go to a competent lawyer, file a legal action for endangering your unborn child. This case is possible even if the woman is not married to you as far as the seed is your. Note: this may caused you your relationship with the family. But it's very effective. After giving birth, you may decided to dissolve the marriage if the relationship becomes sour.

Among the two possible solution above, I will advise you to go for the first. Even if it's a small gbedu, just give it to them as their last supper.

SGANIVA:
Please I need an advise ,I want dissolve my four months old marriage .

If you follow my post on nairaland you will see where I posted about looking for a wife some months ago ,yes someone later introduced me to this girl who's from anambra state dunukofia local government . I guess she's beautiful and possess some of the qualities I wanted from my own view , the person that introduced me to this lady already told her family all about me and my business . so no need of wasting time , we went to her place for the traditional rite with my people after three weeks of knowing her
.
Everything was successful after I have spent 800k on traditional rite , there elders insist I must do traditional marriage for the community (igba nkwu ) which my people argue but to no Vail ,well the later release my wife to me .
To God be the glory my wife became pregnant the second month ,there family started mounting pleasure on me again for the igba nkwu (traditional marriage ) and wedding , well this time my business was having a major shake up because is December already, we need to settle out with partners including financial institutions

Brother please calm down.

Please note that every Igbo home takes marriage very serious even if their daughter is wayward

All those advicing you to divorce your pregnant woman Don't mean well att all.

You see eh! I don't want to call it pride from the side of the parents but it's like a norm in most Igbo communities.

Believe me, your wife and her parents loves you but they are acting in such manner because they are scared you might dump their daughter tomorrow, so a traditional marriage at least would have saved you from most of this bashing.

Try as much as you can to initiate at least the traditional Marriage an see how everyone would be happy.

Please don't leave the girl as suggested by some bachelor's here

The are doing this at of pride ,there positions in church and pride in there village, but the knows all this and insist I buy all the things in the list without removing even a single Kobo , with just little above 800k I spent , adding small money or a million could have settled all this

klonboi:


Brother please calm down.

Please note that every Igbo home takes marriage very serious even if their daughter is wayward

All those advicing you to divorce your pregnant woman Don't mean well att all.

You see eh! I don't want to call it pride from the side of the parents but it's like a norm in most Igbo communities.

Believe me, your wife and her parents loves you but they are acting in such manner because they are scared you might dump their daughter tomorrow, so a traditional marriage at least would have saved you from most of this bashing.

Try as much as you can to initiate at least the traditional Marriage an see how everyone would be happy.

Please don't leave the girl as suggested by some bachelor's here

RomanGreen:


Stop lying please, once a lady's bride price is paid, she's officially as good as married. igba nkwo or white wedding is just merriment

See him claiming to be Igbo yet he's calling it "Igbá nkwo" instead of "Igbá nkwú".

Where and when is the bride price paid if not during the Igbá nkwú?

Go back and check the OP's original post and show me where he stated specifically that he has paid the bride price!

SGANIVA:
I don't know if many people here even understand what am saying ,I sell tricycle, Keke and also gives out on hire purchase bases here in onitsha,I got married and full fill all traditional rite , now fix my wedding and traditional ceremony next year but with look of things and money that is involved .

I approached my in-laws to inform them my plans for ceremony the next year but the refuse because the know there daughter is pregnant already threatening me or all type of foul languages , now with lough calculation this things might cost extra 2milion , first Na season we dey , second as a business man , you will fix things that is convenient for your business , but with all this am afraid to continue with this kind of in-laws and wife ,I don't know maybe the think my business collapse because of the ones we did ,by asking me why I should marry there daughter if I know I don't have money

Like i use to say without problems men are nothing
The deed has been done

Options

¹ Finish what you started (suffer pro max) well men love suffering

² Stand on your ground ( at worse they will likely claim your wife child and the baby will bear their name)

The ball is in your court

Lvgirl:
You are funny brother. Someone introduced a lady to you. A man like you. In this modern age.
I know the man go don knack her before. That is the truth.
Just one semester (four months) you are already looking for a way out. Stay there write exams first and see Ur result.

Come back after the results are out

ASUU never call off strike.

lanre9ja:
That why u have to know one another and their family background is very important in any relationship before u proceed in marrying her. At least 6month of courtship.....very important.

Exactly!

Bad in-laws will render your life useless faster, than a bad wife.

Sucre6:
The following red flags u ignored showed u are a simp

1. U can't find a woman to settle down with by yourself, u had to employ the services of friends and family to help u do that?

2. You didn't date this lady to know more about her and her family, u skipped the terms and condition and just clicked on accept

3. Who gets married to a lady after knowing her for just 3 weeks, are we back to stone ages

4. Your desperation in settling down makes your inlaw to see you as a cash cow to take any shit thrown at you.

How can u do Just introduction with 800k plus?

Omo Nah u do yourself abeg

Some men are just daft, if I say my mind now they will say I am rude.

I am sure OP is the kind of man that can't talk or toast a lady.

Na men dey desperate for marriage now no be women again

Marriage and plenty palava...
I dnt even know what to say.

Chai relationship or courtship is very important but not my line

Mr poor man... u haven't paid complete for the package yet you're fuckiiing and straffiing their daughter all the styles u know and can think of


U even went a step further to impregnate her



Pay complete or get lost sir

SGANIVA:
The are doing this at of pride ,there positions in church and pride in there village, but the knows all this and insist I buy all the things in the list without removing even a single Kobo , with just little above 800k I spent , adding small money or a million could have settled all this

Brother Please when it comes to marriage 800k is money for yoghurt and it's not something you drink and tell the whole world.
Though I don't know your level of income but
please stop emphasizing on the 800k you paid, you did it for your wife and she deserves more than that sef. Also whatever ceremony you do regarding your union is done just once in life, you don't repeat traditional marriage or white wedding.

Finally their is pride in bringing up a child to a marriageable level, trust me their are so many ladies that don't want to get married rather they prefer keeping several men or sampling several dks, I had one sometime ago. you found someone that wants to marry you please appreciate their parents for bringing her Up to be a wife. this you will find in every Godly home. Please appreciate the parents by doing at least a traditional celebration

Life of a SIMPle man. It's a misery all-round. Ehya, sorry ehn

klonboi:


Brother Please when it comes to marriage 800k is money for yoghurt and it's not something you drink and tell the whole world.
Though I don't know your level of income but
please stop emphasizing on the 800k you paid, you did it for your wife and she deserves more than that sef. Also whatever ceremony you do regarding your union is done just once in life, you don't repeat traditional marriage or white wedding.

Finally their is pride in bringing up a child to a marriageable level, trust me their are so many ladies that don't want to get married rather they prefer keeping several men or sampling several dks, you found someone that wants to marry you please appreciate their parents for bringing her Up to be a wife. this you will find in every Godly home. Please appreciate the parents by doing at least a traditional celebration

Which kind nonsense be dis ?
Op! Be proud of every Naira and Kobo of that 800K, people who spent less than 50K are having peace.
You deserve the peace especially in these times of rarely serious men (even tho you're still ignorant).

I think now you'll be forced to learn about female nature and how it will affect you.