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How Necessary Is Marriage? - Family - Nairaland

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Poll: Marriage is necessary in the Nigerian culture?

True: 88% (117 votes)
False: 11% (15 votes)
This poll has ended

Is Marriage A Measure Of Success In Life? / Is Marriage An Achievement? / Is Marriage Worth It For Guys? (2) (3) (4)

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How Necessary Is Marriage? by luuvbuuh(f): 3:34pm On Aug 23, 2007
HOW NECESSARY IS MARRIAGE?

The whole rave about meeting the right person and settling down i do not get, how many married couples are actually happy? especially the youger couples, I would like to hear your opinions,
Re: How Necessary Is Marriage? by ritchboi: 4:36pm On Aug 23, 2007
I gues ur female
Re: How Necessary Is Marriage? by lifegal(f): 8:21am On Aug 24, 2007
Marriage is necessary ohhhhhhhhhhhh!

go and read Genesis 1:28 no be me talk am ohhhhhhhhhhh!

so many people are not happy in thier marriage cos thats the way they want it or i would say depending on want foundation was laid. ok

so! so! so! The book of proverb 14:1 says and i quote " Every wise woman buildeth her House, but the foolish plucketh it with her hands.

so girl be WISE.
Re: How Necessary Is Marriage? by luuvbuuh(f): 5:38pm On Aug 24, 2007
I plan to marry, but when I look around me i am very discouraged, yet we all scamper to the alter, the bible supports marriage alright but do we as humans do it the the Bible meant it? Why cant two people meet fall in love, get married and be faithful to each other, respecting matrimony and keeping it sacred? As soon as the wedding ends and the dancing and merryment ends it is another matter alltogether, it is sad! so dearie its not like i dont support marriage I just wish people had more respect for the insttution, men especially![color=#990000]
Re: How Necessary Is Marriage? by xele: 8:50pm On Aug 24, 2007
Ewo! Guys, dis babe don fall we hand ooo! She talk am say we no dey respect matrimony. Ngbo? Na true?
Re: How Necessary Is Marriage? by HisMichele(f): 9:17pm On Aug 24, 2007
[color=#770077][/color] Marriage is a very IMPORTANT part of our society. I think that we have a tendency of looking at it as a fairy tale, and that all you have to do is fall in love, get married and live happily every after. I have been married once, when I was very young, and had NO idea realistically of the commitment and work it takes to make a marriage. It takes dedication, honesty and trust. We seem to not be able to do any of these things with the little things in our lives, let alone anything as important as marriage. I think society as a whole must start living life with those attributes in EVERYTHING we do, and if we can be dependable, trustworthy, dedicated, and honest with our jobs, our family, our everyday life, then they will spill over into the marriage aspect of our life as well when we meet the right person.
Re: How Necessary Is Marriage? by lifegal(f): 10:24am On Aug 27, 2007
@ Poster

Yes i agree with u, is not all about the ceremony is all about love, trust, patience, endurance, faithfulness etc.most of our men lack some of these qualities, but what we have to do as christians is to pray to god to give a God fearing spouse. Finish.

@ HisMichele

i agree with u.
Re: How Necessary Is Marriage? by opokonwa(m): 10:19am On Aug 28, 2007
Marriage is as necessary to you as you deem it!
Re: How Necessary Is Marriage? by Afariogun1(m): 10:04am On Aug 31, 2007
Guys, it is good to be married and there is a natural set of blessings that follow it. The major problem is getting involved with the wrong person. It makes your life a living hell and if you are lucky to get it right, you are on top of the world.

So, how do we tackle this major problem?

I suggest you marry your friend because, when love fades out, friendship remains and friendship can refresh the fading love like we refresh our browsers.

The most important thing in my conclusion is prayer before and during.

Cheers
Re: How Necessary Is Marriage? by Aladunni(f): 10:32am On Aug 31, 2007
Marriage concept is like houseflies by the window, the ones inside wants to get out, the ones outside wants to come in. but more importantly preprare for the worst and hope for the best weneva u tink of getting married. i hope this keeps u at bay a little
Re: How Necessary Is Marriage? by Afariogun1(m): 11:48am On Aug 31, 2007
Thank you
Re: How Necessary Is Marriage? by vigasimple(m): 11:25pm On Sep 05, 2007
Marriage is necessary for so many reasons.

1. Biblical or even according to the Quaran if you are a muslim.

2. Marriage is the foundation of which a family is built upon, family is the foundation of which community and ultimately a nation is built upon.


The more I think about God and the bible, the more I think he is just a perfect God. He knew without marriage and all the laws that goes with it , there will be a lot of heart breakers and everybody will be chasing others wife/husband and we will become like a lesser animals that sleep around-like dogs, he goat etc.

Institution of marriage has been brought so low that a lot people have lost faith in it, thank God the majority still do believe in it.

If your find your bone of bone, flesh of flesh you will surely be on top of the world. with marriage, the 'DNA' of both husband and wife must match, and if they do, the two will become one like friends, brother and sister and father and mother.

There is man of God called Dr. Sola Fola-Alade and his wife, they are both pastors. They said that if you are going to drive, you will go to driving school, if you want to become a doctor you will go to medical schl for 7 years and to become a lawyer you will spend the next 5 years at both university and law school.

Marriage should also have a school that you learn the practical and the spiritual aspect, most people only spend a very short time to go for 'counselling' and this only happens most when there is a crises.

In my conclusion marriage is not only necessary, essential but should be the most important in life, unfortunately one of the party usually abuses it when they knew the other would do anything to make the marriage to work.

Modern day has not make marriage to stand up well as some people even now celebrate separation and divorce epecially in the west.

May God help us to make the right decision with prayers and find our own life partner.
Re: How Necessary Is Marriage? by luvlawyer(f): 6:19pm On Sep 06, 2007
that depends on you
Re: How Necessary Is Marriage? by realdosh: 6:27pm On Sep 06, 2007
luuvbuuh:

HOW NECCESSARY IS MARRIAGE?

The whole rave about meeting the right person and settling down i do not get, how many married couples are actually happy? especially the youger couples, I would like to hear your opinions,



My sister i am dont intend to marry either, its just like caging yourself in the name of love.
Its not by force.

The thing is when you say u dont wanna marry ppl say maybe you want to be a reverend father or holy sister, thts shit more cage-in.

Some of us just are better off alone and free like me and u.

Michael.
Re: How Necessary Is Marriage? by obonyunmi1(f): 6:28pm On Sep 06, 2007
@poster

re - write the bible then.
Re: How Necessary Is Marriage? by realdosh: 6:41pm On Sep 06, 2007
obo.nyunmi:

@poster

re - write the bible then.



Are you telling me that a person should kill her joy in the name of christianity and what the bible says.
Re: How Necessary Is Marriage? by geegee(f): 5:15pm On Sep 08, 2007
marrage is not a do or die affair someone is telling u to read the genesis,what has the bible got to do with it? some people in the bible never got married and they were great preacher of the gospel of jesus ex paul,john the babtist, and many other.u can be married and still not be happy and u can be single and be fufilled.
Re: How Necessary Is Marriage? by gna101(f): 3:16am On Sep 15, 2007
An 8-yr old girl recently asked me, at a Bible Study roundtable discussion, why I didn't pray for a husband. I was at a loss for words - how do you tell a child that marriage is not necessarily the [i]raison d'etre[/i]of every female?

Don't get me wrong, I am not against marriage. I guess it is as necessary as you make it out to be. I place more emphasis on finding the right one. If it's not quite right, any question of marriage is null and void.

Especially when you don't have to hear that biological clock ticking anymore.
Re: How Necessary Is Marriage? by ginnie(f): 9:31pm On Sep 15, 2007
@ poster

My sista you just took the question out of my mouth. I wonder wat is really happening?

There is this mad rush of girls wanting to get married at all cost. Some say they just want to change their surnames. Some want to marry cos the society expects you to be married. One begins to wonder - is that what marriage is all about?
Where is the love, the happiness, the friendship and all that constitutes a happy marriage and a happy home.

Morality has been thrown to the winds. You walk on the streets and out of 5 people that asks you out, 3 are married men. We don't seem to have married men anymore wat we have now are MARRIED BACHELORS.

It now seems that it is a norm that every married man should have girl friends outside his matrimonial home.

You begin to ask your self - how about the marital vows they took at the altar before God and man.

God have mercy O!

For me i think if you find the right person, you get married, if not, move on with your life happily.

Cheers.
Re: How Necessary Is Marriage? by dJOozz(m): 11:55am On Jan 16, 2008
the institution is NOT nessecery to have a happy relationship
Re: How Necessary Is Marriage? by Nobody: 10:54am On Jan 17, 2008
u see we nigerians pick the passage of the bible that most suits us or defines the situation we are in. can all these pple that quote the bible give me one verse where it says marriage is compulsory?

to the best of my knowledge, the bible encourages marriage but no where in the bible did it make it compulsory.

na wa for our naija pple
Re: How Necessary Is Marriage? by Esss(m): 10:59am On Jan 17, 2008
Na wah, wich kine ajuju be dis biko?? Just ask ur parents dis question and see/hear their response. Na slap dem go use correct ur head.

My dear, I use to ask this same question back in the days but not anymore. It is very important o! shikina.
Re: How Necessary Is Marriage? by sagitarius(m): 11:36am On Jan 17, 2008
I thinkits necessary,just dat it shuld be with d rite person. most ppl just jump into it just 4 d fact dat they want 2 get married & only end up being sad.
Re: How Necessary Is Marriage? by silodel: 12:06pm On Jan 17, 2008
Marriage is just like a school as in institution where you get admission into and learn, it s you to determine the department you want and once you made mistake you go back to the square one.
Before jumping into marriage examine your self first and ask your self that did i really need it now or i should hold on, and you must be able to learn from others mistake.
Re: How Necessary Is Marriage? by hanen(f): 12:27pm On Jan 17, 2008
It's not necessary, and that's just the truth. If anyone wants to go Biblical, they wil not gfind nay line where God goes, "You must marry". Fine, it's a blessing and all, and it comes with its own rewards and issues, but as Paul also said, 'it's not by force'.

In Nigeria however, I'm afraid we're still victims of our own backward mindset. It saddens me the way girls fall over themselves for a simple 'Mrs' attached to their names. We dont help ourselves, you see women looking down on other women simply because they left school 2 years ago and are still single. Is there an award somewhere that one gets when they marry? We women of nowadays need to stand firm in our beliefs and goals, instead beign scared of what others will think.

I have nothing against marriage, I'd like to settle down and have kids one day, but frankly I don't see the RUSH, URGENCY or the NECESSITY to do so before one's psychologically ready. THAT's why marriages fail. You have two immature people living together thinking it'll sail because they had a wedding where 5 governors attended.
Re: How Necessary Is Marriage? by flyKUDE(m): 12:32pm On Jan 17, 2008
be fruitful and multiply, Biblical injunction, and no fornication/adultery, from ten commandments, so from inference,marriage is neccesary.
Re: How Necessary Is Marriage? by johnbush(m): 12:47pm On Jan 17, 2008
marriage is still very much relevant to our society. however, i think the reason most young couples end up unhappy and disappointed in the institution of marriage is that they go into marriage with false expectations. they think that marriage is this blissful union where couples get to live happily all the time, where either spouse is supposed to be perfect, but this is not the reality most times. and rather than work through their problems, most times such couples prefer to split up. I WANNA SAY THAT THERE AIN'T A THING AS LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT! you cannot love somebody you don't know. pls, people should really get to know each other very well and build up a relationship based on trust, mutual understanding and respect before deciding to tie the knot, and shouldn't get married just because they have great sex together 'cause believe me(and i know what i'm talking 'bout), sometime in the not too distant future after marriage, sex isn't gonna matter all that much.
Re: How Necessary Is Marriage? by doracle4(m): 12:53pm On Jan 17, 2008
The institution of marriage was deemed necessary by the Almighty God whom  I hope no one would say made a mistake. For the fact that so many marriages are failing, we need to question the moral altitude of our generation, where good behaviour and decent living is for only those we call "Holy Holy".
Our great grand parents held life with high regard hence their respect for the institution but our generation, where stuffs are packed into our heads by technology and the hype for liberation and freedom, marriage is seen as nothing. If its nothing, then what kind of kids do u expect to get from such nothingness?
Nobody is patient anymore with anybody. If u dont like what i do, GO AWAY! No one understands what it takes to love and what commitment means anymore. If u truly love someone, why are u so afraid to spend the rest of urself with that one?
Re: How Necessary Is Marriage? by oziomatv(m): 12:57pm On Jan 17, 2008
To Me Marriage Is Not Necessary.
      I'm not ready to be forced by the law to  leave a house I suffered to get to a woman who will
one night get fed up of my love. a man in the uniform will come knock at the door to tell me
", gentleman pick your valuable things and stay hundred meters away from this building, "
then another young boy will step in to enjoy my sweat.
     I'm into what is called COHABITATION for years now and still enjoying it. the moment you sign that death certificate called
 marriage certificate you start living in fears cause you don't know what tomorrow will bring.
     But as I'm now if anything happens you take what belongs to you I take what belongs to me.
         

       
                                marriage reduces the quality of love
Re: How Necessary Is Marriage? by choco4life(m): 1:03pm On Jan 17, 2008
Marriage is divine as most christian know, ordained by God.
But lately, this divine institution is being taken for granted,which
makes me develop a cold feet for marriage myself.
Most people especially the female folks go in the marriage because the
society(Nigerian to be precise) frowns at ladies who have outgrown
marriageable age and still single or those who decide not to marry after all.
It would take a long time before the Nigerian society in general accepts females who prefer to
be single than get married, with the rate of divorce now on the high side i don't blame ladies
trying to stay away from this once loved institution.
Re: How Necessary Is Marriage? by klan(f): 1:04pm On Jan 17, 2008
@
Re: How Necessary Is Marriage? by MISSWORLD1(f): 1:09pm On Jan 17, 2008
I BELIEVE MARRIAGE IS BLESSED UNION,CAUSE HE WHO FINDS A PARTNER,FINDS A FAVOUR, I'LL LOVE TO GET MARRIED SOONEST ,BUT THE GUY IS NOT READY, NO JOB,NO HOUSE,NO SERIOUS PLANS, JUST FICTION, I REALLY WISH WE COULD TAKE THE RELATIONSHIP TO THE MARRIAGE LEVEL,
WE'VE BEEN DATING FOR 7 YRS, undecided,THOUGH I'M STILL YOUNG, BUT I'VE GOT LOTS OF TOASTERS AND ADMIRERS,,BUT I STILL LOVE THIS GUY.
I NEED TO SETTLE, AND YES I DO, HELP

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