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After Being Single For Soo Long, Im Now Scared Of Getting Married. Please Help!! - Family (9) - Nairaland

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Re: After Being Single For Soo Long, Im Now Scared Of Getting Married. Please Help!! by ogwumgbe: 2:59pm On Jan 24, 2023
Kobojunkie:
Oh, but you didn't guess my age and status correctly at all. However, I did correctly diagnose your situation accurately after all. Please go get help immediately! undecided

I got the disease from you after having hot sex with you and the demon in you came to me also
Re: After Being Single For Soo Long, Im Now Scared Of Getting Married. Please Help!! by Kobojunkie: 3:03pm On Jan 24, 2023
ogwumgbe:
I got the disease from you after having hot sex with you and the demon in you came to me also
I am not gay so again you are lying! undecided

Please go get your mental checked before it it too late! undecided
Re: After Being Single For Soo Long, Im Now Scared Of Getting Married. Please Help!! by ogwumgbe: 3:11pm On Jan 24, 2023
Kobojunkie:
I am not gay so again you are lying! undecided

Please go get your mental checked before it it too late! undecided

You are the one that needs your head examined, you posted your shit here as a girl and now you are saying you are not gay. I thought I am talking to a sincere girl that needs help not knowing that I am wasting my time with a queer, Bleep off
Re: After Being Single For Soo Long, Im Now Scared Of Getting Married. Please Help!! by Kobojunkie: 3:14pm On Jan 24, 2023
ogwumgbe:
You are the one that needs your head examined, you posted your shit here as a girl and now you are saying you are not gay. I thought I am talking to a sincere girl that needs help not knowing that I am wasting my time with a queer, Bleep off
I am afraid the delusion is strong with you! undecided
Re: After Being Single For Soo Long, Im Now Scared Of Getting Married. Please Help!! by Saintmary(f): 3:14pm On Jan 24, 2023
EriMma1:
This may sound weird but it's my situation now.

I have been a single and independent lady for a very long time. Though I really looked forward to settling down in my 20s and thirties but because I was the over careful type, I couldn't as I kept being picky due to men's character and behavior.

Fast-forward to my lat 30s, I began to lose interest and started getting more comfortable as a single. The upheavals in today's marriage also got to me. As in the way marriages are packing up, the cheating aspect, abuse and domestic violence in marriages all further affected me and changed my whole perception of the union called marriage. So I unconsciously resolved to remain single as long as I'm happy, comfortable and financially independent.

Some of the reasons I also made up my mind are.
As a single, Im very much at peace, with no one dictating what and when I should do things or get out of bed. I love my bed.
No one is body shaming me when I add on some pounds due to excessive eating and no one is questioning my eating habits as its sometimes the case with some married women. Also running errands when you don't feel up to it just because hubby wants you to do it. Some men can send their wife on errand like crazy and me I hate running errands. angry

No one is disturbing me when I need time alone which could last for hours. I love my space and privacy. So the thought of having to give up all that scares the hell out of me.

Now, back to the matter.

Recently, some close spiritual leaders in my denomination have been trying to match make me with a single pastor and that one too is shining teeth that he has seen a jimjim sister. When they now openly mentioned it yesterday with the said man around and he too was nodding and agreeing to the proposal, it dawned on me that these people are not joking. When I got home, i sank into my comfy space and began to fret. I mean... The thought of giving up all that freedom is just so scary. I suddenly discovered that marriage no longer excites me and my inner self was fighting it.
Also, the thought of carrying pregnancy for nine months with all the stress of looking after babies, tending toddlers ( poo poo) and that motherhood life made me sick instantly. The thought of joggling my job with family life gave me the chills. I see how my married mates struggle with this. Huh. Men...

I don't know. I don't feel cool about this cos it makes me feel like I'm about to be put in a cage and everything about me is going to change.

Now, before you talk about me not loving the man, I think I fancy him and can love him cos he looks so much like my ex of years ago. So that is out of the question. He is a happening lovable man but....... I no longer feel excited about marriage. at least, from what played out yesterday.

Do I need any form of therapy cos my family won't hear of it but this is my situation now ooo... Hmmm



Yes, you have been very selfish by watching other marriages crumble, and protecting yourself from heart break, nothing wrong in that.


Now, please allow me to be very selfish and ask you to stay single, because maybe single life is the best, who knows?


See, love and marriage is for the brave, staying single is also for the brave, depending on your perspective.

The important part is that whichever side of the divide you are on, make sure it's what you really want, to avoid regrets.



Peace.

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Re: After Being Single For Soo Long, Im Now Scared Of Getting Married. Please Help!! by Thewesterner(m): 4:10pm On Jan 24, 2023
You already know/concluded that marriage thingy is not for you... So how do we advice/help you

1 Like

Re: After Being Single For Soo Long, Im Now Scared Of Getting Married. Please Help!! by Phyde: 5:32pm On Jan 24, 2023
shortgun:
Dey play.
You are just lazy, your body will pay for your lazy lifestyle in no distant time if you continue to indulge in what you think is comfort.
The human body is not made for a stress-free lifestyle so get your lazy ass to that teeth shining brother's house if you don't want to wither and die.
Words...
Re: After Being Single For Soo Long, Im Now Scared Of Getting Married. Please Help!! by 4ward4: 5:39pm On Jan 24, 2023
Listed Reasons aren't adding up.
I can only see a person who is scared of Responsibility and commitment.

2 Likes

Re: After Being Single For Soo Long, Im Now Scared Of Getting Married. Please Help!! by engrzico(m): 6:41pm On Jan 24, 2023
My dear, you don't need therapy.

Go and adopt a child legally maybe at age 3-4years.

And live a happy life.
Re: After Being Single For Soo Long, Im Now Scared Of Getting Married. Please Help!! by Kobojunkie: 7:22pm On Jan 24, 2023
shortgun:
Dey play.
You are just lazy, your body will pay for your lazy lifestyle in no distant time if you continue to indulge in what you think is comfort.
The human body is not made for a stress-free lifestyle so get your lazy ass to that teeth shining brother's house if you don't want to wither and die.
So it is OK that stress kills most Nigerians by age 54 then? undecided

OP, better seek to live a stress-free life or you are likely to end up dead before your 57th birthday. undecided
Re: After Being Single For Soo Long, Im Now Scared Of Getting Married. Please Help!! by Brystonluv19(m): 3:47am On Jan 25, 2023
Do what makes you happy
You can contact me for counseling or advice. This is my WhatsApp number 09013391597
Re: After Being Single For Soo Long, Im Now Scared Of Getting Married. Please Help!! by eepeepook: 8:33am On Apr 15, 2023
Every amount of water to him kettle.

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