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Is it Wrong to Call Your Friend's Wife by her first name? - Family (9) - Nairaland

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Re: Is it Wrong to Call Your Friend's Wife by her first name? by goodmike7: 7:54pm On Feb 21, 2023
sharone21:


Obodo too far.... Ordinary Cameroon for backyard, u are called your name by way younger folks.... If u are too respected, u hear Mum...Mami boy.....Madame....But get used to being called your name... Small child can call his grand father's age: Uncle without proper greeting first.

lOL UNCLE. THATS RESPECT
In south afrca, there is nothing like uncle..a child of 4 or 5 only says hello to you..thats it.

1 Like

Re: Is it Wrong to Call Your Friend's Wife by her first name? by WackyJ1(m): 8:42pm On Feb 21, 2023
Cromagnon:
wait till you're married and they call your wife by her name. This is Africa not America

I am a Nigerian in Africa, and you can call my wife by her first name if you knew me before I met my wife.

Thanks.

1 Like

Re: Is it Wrong to Call Your Friend's Wife by her first name? by WackyJ1(m): 8:47pm On Feb 21, 2023
bukatyne:


Ha!

It is clear where the problem is now. Your pride would not let you admit you did something wrong nor let you understand people's boundaries.

Your friend is better off without you.

You seem to have the same mental capacity as the Poco girl.

You've made inferences about my character based on my response to a troll and not the others to similar respectful people.

It shows your sense of poor judgement and thus your contributions are meaningless.

4 Likes

Re: Is it Wrong to Call Your Friend's Wife by her first name? by WackyJ1(m): 8:49pm On Feb 21, 2023
Klass99:


Wow was it that easy and simple? I am happy for you. 1,000 naira is not a big deal so long as you recovered more than that.

So, is this friendship over for good or is there hope for a reconciliation? Well done for requesting your money and getting it back, the fact that he gave it back without drama indicates he is not a terrible person either

No the friendship is dead.

He might have returned the money because of his pride. He didn't want someone to keep holding him because of money.

Regardless of his actions, the friendship is over.

If I start listing things about our past friendship that should have stopped him from going that far, then you will understand why the friendship cannot continue.

2 Likes

Re: Is it Wrong to Call Your Friend's Wife by her first name? by WackyJ1(m): 8:53pm On Feb 21, 2023
Tony4000:
Personally I wouldn’t call my friend’s wife by her name, it’s just the normal Naija concept. I would rather call her madam, or oga wife, in my dialect “Nwunye oga” in proudly Igbo and we don’t call our friends wives by their names. We just accord them some respect not withstanding the age difference. If she done born u can call her mama Peter or whatsoever name their child bears. Na so we see am for my region ooo

You're the first Igbo guy I am seeing say this.

I'll understand if it is Yoruba.

So, let me ask you, will you stop calling your female friends by their first name when they get married?

If your friend of 5 years gets married to a lady, and you call her by her first name, does it warrant the guy warning you in such a manner.
Re: Is it Wrong to Call Your Friend's Wife by her first name? by WackyJ1(m): 8:56pm On Feb 21, 2023
Klass99:


Lol 🤣, your yeye dey boom sha. Is that how they find love these days? His story interested me because I couldn't see what he did wrong.

You call a man's wife by her name and the man chooses to be a jackass about it, forgetting all the times you were there for him and you came through when he needed you.

The Iast sentence of my post which you quoted was directed at another user (ferhyntola) and not the original poster.

I forgot to mention how the Wife has called me her padi.

I've interacted with her several times, but now just after traditional wedding, I cannot call her by her first name again?

2 Likes

Re: Is it Wrong to Call Your Friend's Wife by her first name? by WackyJ1(m): 8:58pm On Feb 21, 2023
id4sho:

B4 I vex for you, collect that money. Send him SMS on how you need that cash.

I don collect am

No vex Sir
Re: Is it Wrong to Call Your Friend's Wife by her first name? by WackyJ1(m): 9:01pm On Feb 21, 2023
acewines:



Is ur friend kind of paying for your needs in this wedding?

The way he sounded na like one big one talking to someone that's not in his level

I can call my wife's name,my brothers' wives names as long as .1, they are not way older than me, my friend's wife own,I can call her by her name, or our wife or madam etc

Now whereby I dey come there come chop and frequent visit, see finish go enter na den someone go dey tell me to put aunty or tell me what to call her....

IT'S NOT WRONG TO CALL ONE BY HIS OR HER NAME, BUT IF THE PERSON IS WAY OLDER THAN YOU, TO SHOW RESPECT IT'S EITHER YOU CALL OGA JOHN OR MADAM BOSE OR AUNTIE OR UNCLE ...

This same friend got upset that I rented my own hotel room when I travelled to the state he was holding his wedding.

I have only been to his house once.

He was owing me far more money than he has ever spent on me.

I am far older than the girl.

I simply called her by her birth name and referred to my own woman with the same name.

1 Like

Re: Is it Wrong to Call Your Friend's Wife by her first name? by WackyJ1(m): 9:03pm On Feb 21, 2023
StrongAlphMale:


Read my previous comment Bros, dey don see you finish na why Dem dey treat you anyhow.

Dude you have a pussy ass SIMP man as a friend and you seriously need to cut him off after collecting your money. Else you'll continue receiving insult on a steady.

Who's the stupid girl that they can't call her name? Even queen Elizabeth Dem dey call her, her name, Buhari's Wife Dem dey call her Aisha, who then is she that they can't mention her name? Bros your friend is plain stupid and a complete simp man who will do anything possible to fight for a woman.

In your write up talked about how you helped him to typed his ex project. Can you imagine the stupidity? Oga your friend is a simp and he's obviously trying to make you one. Cut him off completely to retain your value and respect

You're right.

He's a SIMP.

The relationship is already over.

When I think back to what the guy told me about his relationship with the girl, I remember so many other simp incidents.
Re: Is it Wrong to Call Your Friend's Wife by her first name? by StrongAlphMale: 9:10pm On Feb 21, 2023
WackyJ1:


You're right.

He's a SIMP.

The relationship is already over.

When I think back to what the guy told me about his relationship with the girl, I remember so many other simp incidents.

You knew all along that the dude was a simp and you still choose to hangout with him? Even after all our teachings here on why you must never make a SIMP your friend?

Dude, you're lucky you brought this here to seek help on time, else that guy and his werey wife would have planned and beat you up.

Ogbeni Your friend is clearly a simp man. And you must discard him off completely else you too will start simping like him.
Re: Is it Wrong to Call Your Friend's Wife by her first name? by Imjustagirl(f): 9:13pm On Feb 21, 2023
sharone21:


In USA, your first name.... And with 'Hi'.

Even when you are in your 60s and 70s working with them or as a neighbor.

Because they give you permission and you're familiar with them. Simple
Re: Is it Wrong to Call Your Friend's Wife by her first name? by rickpat(m): 9:15pm On Feb 21, 2023
0monnak0da:

Africans?
You lack exposure
You know nothing and think you know everything
Go and spend the rest of today studying international etiquette
e pain you abi...oya drink insecticide and die... international etiquette for you comes in when it's an issue between two friends...if you even know anything about international etiquette you would know how to address or readdress people's opinion...for the records I don't know everything..you are just a low life that goes about nairaland noticing who thinks he knows it all... anyways,your life,your time... SHALLOW minded imp
Re: Is it Wrong to Call Your Friend's Wife by her first name? by rickpat(m): 9:20pm On Feb 21, 2023
DriveByKiller:
Another Western Puppet.
african Tribalistic donkey spotted
Re: Is it Wrong to Call Your Friend's Wife by her first name? by id4sho(m): 9:23pm On Feb 21, 2023
WackyJ1:


I don collect am

No vex Sir
Correct Guyman
Re: Is it Wrong to Call Your Friend's Wife by her first name? by rickpat(m): 9:25pm On Feb 21, 2023
Imjustagirl:


Even in western world, you can't call someone by their first name without their permission. Either you use Mr, Miss, Mrs
in this context..the guy and his friend's wife are all friends and he calls her by her name before they married
Re: Is it Wrong to Call Your Friend's Wife by her first name? by rickpat(m): 9:55pm On Feb 21, 2023
0monnak0da:

Africans?
You lack exposure
You know nothing and think you know everything
Go and spend the rest of today studying international etiquette
nairaland w
rickpat:
in this context..the guy and his friend's wife are all friends and he calls her by her name before they married
0monnak0da:

Africans?
You lack exposure
You know nothing and think you know everything
Go and spend the rest of today studying international etiquette
nairaland watch dog..you can't type again right?..even if you feel offended by a post.. can't you be sensible enough to correct or go be a better view about the issue?..look here..if you ever in you miserable life mention my Nick again..the thunder that will fire your cursed generation will be worst than a volcano...bloody fool..cus I ignore you guys means you can throw words around as you wish...idiot.. continue building your life on nairaland...dirty pig
Re: Is it Wrong to Call Your Friend's Wife by her first name? by 0monnak0da: 10:00pm On Feb 21, 2023
rickpat:
nairaland w nairaland watch dog..you can't type again right?..even if you feel offended by a post.. can't you be sensible enough to correct or go be a better view about the issue?..look here..if you ever in you miserable life mention my Nick again..the thunder that will fire your cursed generation will be worst than a volcano...bloody fool..cus I ignore you guys means you can throw words around as you wish...idiot.. continue building your life on nairaland...dirty pig
Ogun will kill your mother
Her poor will cry up
Re: Is it Wrong to Call Your Friend's Wife by her first name? by 0monnak0da: 10:01pm On Feb 21, 2023
rickpat:
african Tribalistic donkey spotted
Your father will have an epileptic seizure and fall in front of a truck
Re: Is it Wrong to Call Your Friend's Wife by her first name? by President2001(m): 10:13pm On Feb 21, 2023
Very wrong and disrespectful
Re: Is it Wrong to Call Your Friend's Wife by her first name? by 0monnak0da: 10:16pm On Feb 21, 2023
rickpat:
e pain you abi...oya drink insecticide and die... international etiquette for you comes in when it's an issue between two friends...if you even know anything about international etiquette you would know how to address or readdress people's opinion...for the records I don't know everything..you are just a low life that goes about nairaland noticing who thinks he knows it all... anyways,your life,your time... SHALLOW minded imp
Your mother will drink insecticide and die in agony
Re: Is it Wrong to Call Your Friend's Wife by her first name? by Nobody: 10:27pm On Feb 21, 2023
WackyJ1:


This same friend got upset that I rented my own hotel room when I travelled to the state he was holding his wedding.

I have only been to his house once.

He was owing me far more money than he has ever spent on me.

I am far older than the girl.

I simply called her by her birth name and referred to my own woman with the same name.


My guy, try to withdraw or limit the way you guys relate, give them space

Or summon up courage and talk to your guy that you can't bring your level down for someone you are far older than, if he doesn't like it den make everyone dey him dey
Re: Is it Wrong to Call Your Friend's Wife by her first name? by rickpat(m): 10:27pm On Feb 21, 2023
0monnak0da:

Your mother will drink insecticide and die in agony
when you are done making a nuisance of your frustrated self,you get some sleep..dwarf goat
Re: Is it Wrong to Call Your Friend's Wife by her first name? by 0monnak0da: 10:30pm On Feb 21, 2023
rickpat:
when you are done making a nuisance of your frustrated self,you get some sleep..dwarf goat
Your mother will did shamefully
Re: Is it Wrong to Call Your Friend's Wife by her first name? by johnnyn1(m): 10:33pm On Feb 21, 2023
brain54:
You ain’t wrong…


But since that’s what he wants then respect his wish!

Very wise…
Re: Is it Wrong to Call Your Friend's Wife by her first name? by johnnyn1(m): 10:39pm On Feb 21, 2023
rickpat:
africans and their foolishness...western world that everybody goes by their first name have they died...if I were you,that friendship ends tonight...calling people their name is not disrespectful,it's their name ain't it?

be careful though,cus one day he will tell you to call the wife "aunty"(you know say Aunty get two meanings for naija)

USE YOUR TONGUE COUNT YOUR TEETH,THE WORST Thing WHEN FIT HAPPEN TO A MAN "NA SEE FINISH"...bounce before him and him wife see you finish bro

goodluck


Here goes another one..
Sometimes I ponder on how we reason stuffs.
His friend asked that his wife should not be called by her name anymore since they are married now. is that too much to ask from a friend?

The fact that you brought the shit here depicts the so called friendship you claim you have with your married friend.

What happened to Mutual Understanding??

Omo Nawao.

1 Like

Re: Is it Wrong to Call Your Friend's Wife by her first name? by Tony4000: 10:41pm On Feb 21, 2023
Okay I get you. It depends though, but you can actually call her by her name while having a direct conversation with her being that she has been your friend over the years but while talking to her hubby about his wife, never call her by her name.
WackyJ1:


You're the first Igbo guy I am seeing say this.

I'll understand if it is Yoruba.

So, let me ask you, will you stop calling your female friends by their first name when they get married?

If your friend of 5 years gets married to a lady, and you call her by her first name, does it warrant the guy warning you in such a manner.
Re: Is it Wrong to Call Your Friend's Wife by her first name? by Nobody: 10:42pm On Feb 21, 2023
WackyJ1:
Is it a crime to call the Wife of your friend by her first name?

I've known this guy since 2018. He met his wife in 2020.

They've done traditional wedding.

I once followed this guy to law faculty of our school during our Masters program and spent 6 hours typing the project of his then ex.

The same ex ended up blaming him for her misfortune.

I'm the best man for his white wedding tomorrow.

Yet, he's warning me for calling his wife her first name in the same sentence where I also referred to my girlfriend by her own first name.

He claims I was wrong and he has refused to apologise.

I need this one the front page.

Was I wrong?

MORE DETAILS
https://www.nairaland.com/7563621/it-wrong-call-friends-wife/2#120932806
The thing with text speak is you cannot interpret the tone in which it was typed.
He could have been joking and it was just a banter between friends.
If it bothers you ring him up and asks if he meant it and if he did then oblige and not call her by her name even if you do your girl.
It all boils down to the nature of your friendship with him.
Please don’t lose sleep over it there are more pressing problems to worry about in our Nigeria today.
Re: Is it Wrong to Call Your Friend's Wife by her first name? by Tony4000: 10:50pm On Feb 21, 2023
Then again, the guy wasn’t so polite telling you that, some people have problems with communication so at the end of the day don’t take it to heart so much, but the right thing you should have done was address her as “your wife” or “your woman”
WackyJ1:


You're the first Igbo guy I am seeing say this.

I'll understand if it is Yoruba.

So, let me ask you, will you stop calling your female friends by their first name when they get married?

If your friend of 5 years gets married to a lady, and you call her by her first name, does it warrant the guy warning you in such a manner.
Re: Is it Wrong to Call Your Friend's Wife by her first name? by WackyJ1(m): 11:00pm On Feb 21, 2023
StrongAlphMale:


You knew all along that the dude was a simp and you still choose to hangout with him? Even after all our teachings here on why you must never make a SIMP your friend?

Dude, you're lucky you brought this here to seek help on time, else that guy and his werey wife would have planned and beat you up.

Ogbeni Your friend is clearly a simp man. And you must discard him off completely else you too will start simping like him.

I'm done with him

And I can never SIMP.

I've already done my time.
Re: Is it Wrong to Call Your Friend's Wife by her first name? by donhils: 11:09pm On Feb 21, 2023
Your friend might be a simp, otherwise I don't see anything in you calling her by her name. They met in 2020, so from 2020 till date what have you been calling her? That all of a sudden you must call her his wife? Really nigga? Well, all my friends that have wives, I call them by their first names and nothing's gonna change it, and none ever complained or saw it as anything
Re: Is it Wrong to Call Your Friend's Wife by her first name? by DkJay: 12:50am On Feb 22, 2023
grin grin

Wackyj1

The matter funny sha. But I've picked up a thing or two from reading through all the comments from the beginning.

When I think about it, it's not common for my parens' friends to refer to either of them by their names, but it happens.

In my own little experience, my babe is a family friend. She has her own relationship with everyone in my family and they all address her by her name.

I doubt that's gonna change when we get married

I think this name calling matter is dependent on two factors.

1. How your friend wants his wife to be addressed.

2. The closeness between you and your friend's spouse.

But between these two factors, methinks the wishes of the man carries more weight.

Like it or not, marriage is an accomplishment in this side of the world so yeah, people attach a lot of things to it.

It is also true that every man wants to guard his territory, even women. "Your wife", "your husband", "Madam", "Oga" and other similar titles do that for people, i.e., guarding their territories.

And as someone said, with the emotional blindness people develop in the area of marriage, it is not far-fetched for anyone to jump into conclusion that you're sleeping with their wife, that's why you can afford to be so familiar with them.

About the friendship, na man you be.

If you want to cut it off, it's up to you. But I don't think you should hide it.

Straight up tell him that he effed up and tell him your grievances. You guys might be able to come to a better understanding and respect for each other or you reach a compromise.

Even if you don't, at least everyone is clear on where the other person is.

I no dey like any funky business. If you no rate me, tell me to my face. Don't hide about it or beat around the bush.

That said, for the sake of peace, do as he says.

If you can't, let everyone go their separate ways.
Re: Is it Wrong to Call Your Friend's Wife by her first name? by Bilquiss: 1:31am On Feb 22, 2023
What matters is what your friend wants..he wants my wife,call her his wife,simple.

A friend of ours calls his wife sugar..we all call her sugar too,no one calls her by her name and yet this man does not play with his wife, carries her like an egg and everyone accords her same respect.

We call other friends wives madam,our wife,or her name,depends on context.. When we ask after her,we can say how madam etc. If we are told to call her Mrs x,y,z, we comply.

I don't know why this is an issue and you're insisting on calling name wey husband no want. The victim may not even know you both de exchange insult over her name.
E just be like say fight dey hungry una since

1 Like

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