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Long Distance Marriage: How Do You Cope Married Couples In Similiar Situation / See Photos Of Long Distance Marriage That Will Make Your Day, Also Fans Reaction / Lady Who Married After 3-Month Long Distance Relationship Speaks After It Ended (2) (3) (4)
|Long Distance Marriage by Yemialade(f): 10:18pm On Jun 21, 2023
My name is Juliet and live in Ibadan
I met my boyfriend in Ibadan last year December when he came for business in my town.
We started dating and we are now planning for marriage .
I work as a teacher in a big school in Ibadan ,I just got the job after working in all this small small school .
My boyfriend is a construction manager and he has his own side business also.
So as we are planning I told my boyfriend I will move to kwara and leave my job when we get married o.
He was like I can keep my job if I like it cause I told him how I feel concerning that I just gotten the job which has huge benefit and salary increasement as I will be given promotion too.
So I was like how will I be doing it
He agreed for me to keep the job and we plan that I will be travelling twice in a month to kwara to see my husband.
But this is hard ,it is easy for men to be doing this but it is not for women.
Will this long distance marriage thing destroy my marriage as I will be a travelling wife ,what if temptation came to place for my husband when am not around just because of my job
I want to be there for my family .
What should I do in this kind of situation
|Re: Long Distance Marriage by Abfinest007(m): 10:46pm On Jun 21, 2023
Let him join u in ur state shikena
|Re: Long Distance Marriage by HarunaWest(m): 11:39pm On Jun 21, 2023
Yemialade:Are you not aware that subsidy has been removed? Don't you have your own dreams in life or you are here to live a man's dream??
|Re: Long Distance Marriage by Worriedwife: 11:50pm On Jun 21, 2023
It won't work. Move to join him or u look for another husband to marry in Ibadan.
|Re: Long Distance Marriage by Klass99(f): 12:11am On Jun 22, 2023
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|Re: Long Distance Marriage by JeffreyJunior: 12:23am On Jun 22, 2023
For oga to say you can stay back in Ibadan after marriage and visit him twice a month in Kwara, two things are involved.
He is either making a promise he can't keep or he has resident sidechick there in Kwara.
Another scenario is if oga no too trust his job and don't want you to lose yours that seems to flourish at the moment. But in this case, he should be talking of moving to Ibadan instead.
New marriage suppose too sweet for couples to be thinking of staying apart even for a second.
If I ever use this my mouth tell my wife that eeh, just know that one of my numerous sidechicks don move into an apartment close to my house.
|Re: Long Distance Marriage by Starz825(m): 3:27am On Jun 22, 2023
Op ...this is the best advice and no 3 is the best option....
I say intelligent people full NL
|Re: Long Distance Marriage by Mindlog: 5:02am On Jun 22, 2023
After all those years you sweated through those smaller schools and now gotten a career upgrade, you want to walk away from it in Nigeria's present situation while not certain what Kwara state has in stock for you?
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|Re: Long Distance Marriage by Acidosis(m): 6:27am On Jun 22, 2023
Indicate your salary in your post.
|Re: Long Distance Marriage by bukatyne(f): 9:33am On Jun 22, 2023
Your concerns are valid and married couples should live together or make plans to live together as quickly as possible. Hence, your suggestion of resigning at your school after marriage is not out of place.
However, I have a number of reservations:
1. This is a very short long distance relationship. Do you know him well enough to vouch he doesn't have another family or a secret life at Kwara? In most cases like this, the husband either wants the wife to join him or he wants to join his wife (if her location presents better opportunities). When they unfortunately can't stay together, the wife's location is the family's base so the husband does the travelling.
2. How is the economic situation in Kwara? Have you been to Kwara before? Any idea of life there?
3. Piggybacking on point 2, do you know his financial capability? Do you know the kind of life he lives in Kwara? How viable are his businesses? Do you understand the basics of his business and how he makes money from them? E.g. Dangote produces goods and sell at a profit kind of base knowledge?
4. Are you convinced that this man is for you or you are desperate to marry due to age, his perceived wealth or any other reason?
I would advise you get to really know him more, his thought process and why he is eager for you to remain in Ibadan and come visit him in Kwara.
After you are convinced he is the one, research life in Kwara and if there are commensurate 'big schools' you can work in. Your school might even have a branch or sister school you can transfer to.
If you guys go along with this long distance marriage, what is the timeline for the family to consolidate and at where?
As for adultery, men with multiple wives still have side chicks. While I am not saying a wife shouldn't play her part, a husband who is inclined to commit adultery would do so 99% of the time.
|Re: Long Distance Marriage by akaahs(m): 11:40am On Jun 22, 2023
My dear long distance marriage isn't easy at all.
My wife just called me last night and was crying of loneliness, burden of taking care of the baby alone, infact everything is tiring to her because we are apart. I do the travelling, i have never allowed her travel to my place except on interviews or she decided to take the risk herself.
My take is, is either you stand on leaving ur job/career in ibadan to be with ur husband in advance or forget him, keep ur job in ibadan and pray for husband there.
|Re: Long Distance Marriage by Nobody: 2:57pm On Jun 22, 2023
OP, leaving a good job for a man you've only known for a few months would be
My suggestion: if you want to continue this relationship with him, don't quit your job and run to Kwara, but find a job in Kwara first and ensure it's a good-paying job that can sustain you there. You should also use that time to study this man's character more. OR better yet, look for someone closer to you in Ibadan that you can get to know well, who wants to be with you, then you take it from there.
|Re: Long Distance Marriage by fyzaila: 3:12pm On Jun 22, 2023
Beautiful advices are just flowing, op use your head o
|Re: Long Distance Marriage by Foodqueen(f): 4:26pm On Jun 22, 2023
Thank God holiday is around the corner.
Go and spend enough time with your guy, after then u can decide on what to do.
|Re: Long Distance Marriage by anthonyuncle(m): 9:25pm On Jun 22, 2023
how long will this arrangement last?
when is the agreed time for the family to start living together
|Re: Long Distance Marriage by Houseofglam7(f): 12:10am On Jun 23, 2023
|Re: Long Distance Marriage by Fiscus105(m): 5:49am On Jun 23, 2023
I biliv u read that the new school is a private school? And in private, no job security? You also aware that several ladies grow old without life partners in their lifetime?
Perhaps aunt age is thickening on secondly basis towards menopause.
NB. Working in private school is also uncertainty future as well, infact, it's even worse than Marriage uncertainty.
|Re: Long Distance Marriage by Candidlady: 5:50am On Jun 23, 2023
Ilike what you did there
So temptation can't come to your place lol
Ipray Allah guides and direct you
Anything concerning man and woman ino dey like put mouth
Idont move that way
|Re: Long Distance Marriage by Fiscus105(m): 6:16am On Jun 23, 2023
Tactically and if possible spiritually find out if.
1. Ur guy is a good man.
2. Know his goals
3 Does he align with ur goal?
4. Does he give generously towards his family affair? (ie. preparation towards wedding, how has he contributing? wen u ask him for things, (money, advice, prayers etc) what are responses.
If u can score him 60%, I will advice you to move in with him , immediately after wedding.
Private school is not one of jobs that should prevent u not to move in with ur hubby biko.
Thousand of private schools that u can work with in anywhere u find urself, remember urs is to compliment and not main financer.
|Re: Long Distance Marriage by Klass99(f): 7:49am On Jun 23, 2023
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|Re: Long Distance Marriage by Fiscus105(m): 8:07am On Jun 23, 2023
I will be very surprised if u re not single mother and if u re still married, I salute ur husband who housed embittered species.
You re only given sermon to demonlise me and pushing me towards what I didn't say nor my intention.
I think you should concentrate about OP's scenario and not Okonjo iweala or Obi Ezekwesilie among others.
The girl we are talking about, is not working in CBN nor NNPC not even govt sch but private that littered every clan in Nigeria.
I will advice u not to give advise base on ur own interests and fancies, perhaps, bitter experience.
The lady in her statement, u can read that, she would be the one who would like to be with her love and not a fan of feminist as u be.
What stops a lady working in private school to leave and move with her husband, private school she can easily get in Kwara, even if it's lower income. With that, it a win-win situation.
Did u also imagine that if she fails to marry this time around, she may miss for life?
Did u know what it means to be without husband and childless?
Madam in life, it's about compromise o. If u want to have it all, U may end up loosing it all .
If ur Marriage is bitter, it doesn't mean some wives are not enjoy their marriages maximally ok.
|Re: Long Distance Marriage by Klass99(f): 8:16am On Jun 23, 2023
5 Likes 1 Share
|Re: Long Distance Marriage by dboY1123(m): 11:36am On Jun 25, 2023
Hello OP, please can I get a teaching job in Ibadan too?
I studied Education Bsc(ed).
Thanks in advance.
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